Outbreak (5 page)

I hadn’t expected that, but it doesn’t do much to dampen the sting of betrayal. “Why should I believe you?”

“I don’t know, Harper! Maybe because I’ve done nothing except protect you since the day I met you. Why would this change anything?”

“It changes everything!” I cry. “I can’t trust you!”

Eli closes his eyes and lets out a frustrated growl. “What was I supposed to do? I had to get you out of here, and lying was the only way to make you leave.”

“It doesn’t matter! When two people are together, they aren’t supposed to lie to each other. And you’ve lied to me
twice
now.”

Eli’s eyes widen in surprise. I know bringing up his lie about my recruitment is a low blow, but that isn’t the part of my rant that captures his attention.

“Together?” he repeats.

Oh god.
My face glows bright red, and I try to backpedal. “I just mean . . . it doesn’t even . . .” I let out a burst of air. “I know you only did what you did to protect me, but I can’t be with someone who’s going to lie to me just because it’s more convenient than the truth.”

“
More convenient
? Are you serious? If I hadn’t lied, you could be rotting away in the dead level by now. Would that be better?”

“No!” I splutter. “I know why you did it, Eli, but it doesn’t mean it was the right thing to do.”

Now he looks truly furious. Those blue eyes I could get lost in for days have turned cold and empty. His warm, kissable mouth has tightened into an angry line, and he’s doing his signature “towering over me” thing. 

When he speaks, his voice is barely audible — and deadly serious. “It
was
the right thing to do, Harper. I don’t
care
if you’re too stubborn or pissed off to see it. Go pout about it . . . talk it over with Sawyer or whatever. I don’t care. But you need to get out of this compound — with or without me.”

He takes one last second to let his words sink in and then brushes past me into the training center. A few mutinous tears are stinging in my eyes, but I wipe them away furiously and whip around to follow him at a distance.

By the time I join the other cadets in line, Eli is already giving instructions in his cool detached way. It’s as though the last few minutes never happened. 

I find it infuriating that it’s so easy for him to compartmentalize, but I’m more angry with myself. I
hate
letting my emotions run the show, and lately I haven’t been able to control them. True, there have been some unusual circumstances — getting the rug pulled out from under me with my placement in Recon; finding out that the entire VocAps system was a lie; getting on Constance’s bad side; getting shot at and blown up on the Fringe; killing people and nearly getting killed myself — but it’s no excuse. 

I need to get my shit together. Otherwise, Jayden’s going to have no trouble manipulating me.

My own fucked-up fixation with Eli is the reason I was so hurt and angry about his life-saving deception. He’s right. It
was
the right thing to do. I never would have left the compound if he’d told me the truth, and there was no question that I needed to.

“Riley!”

I jump at the sound of Eli’s voice.

“Yes, sir?” I
hate
that I have to call Eli “sir.”

“Did you hear what I just said?”

I bite the inside of my cheek to keep myself from rolling my eyes. “No, sir.”

Eli drags in a big breath as though he’s gearing up for some big douchey display of authority, but then the fight leaves his eyes. “I said that you’d work with Adams on the sim course today. He needs some extra work there to prepare for deployment.”

“Yes, sir.”

Eli dismisses us, and I look down the line for Blaze. With his serious new haircut, he looks tougher and more intimidating, yet there’s this raw terror in his eyes I recognize from my first deployment: It’s the sudden realization that you’re woefully unprepared for what you’re about to face and that your days could be numbered.

I offer him a weak smile and jerk my head toward the double doors. “Ready?”

Blaze breaks into a grin and follows me toward the exit.

As soon as we’re out of the noisy training center, he quickens his stride until he’s right at my shoulder. “What was all that about?”

“What?”

“The thing with Parker. I saw him drag you out of the training center. He looked pissed.”

“Oh . . . you saw that?”

“Yeah. It was kind of a dick move . . . yanking you out in front of everybody like that.”

“Yeah, it was.”

“So . . . why did he?”

I sigh and throw my body against the heavy door leading to the simulation course. I don’t want to make up some lie to get Blaze off my back, but it’s not as though I can tell him what’s really going on.

“He was mad that I took the fight with Marta.”

Blaze’s eyes widen in surprise, and for the first time, I notice they’re an unusual blue-green color. 

“Why? He does illegal fights. And I thought Parker was in on that whole thing.”

“He was at first, but he didn’t want me to fight Marta. He thought she was too dangerous.”

“Well, he was right.”

I try to ignore the twinge of irritation that statement provokes. I still have a black eye to remind me of that fact; I don’t need everybody telling me how wrong I was.

But instead of taking my frustration out on Blaze, I slide the bolt into place and flip the heavy switch. The stage lighting flickers on corner by corner in the gigantic open space, and I get a slight pang of nausea when the fake cars and rock formations come into view. 

The course is designed to provide realistic target practice, with painted outlines of people jumping out from behind obstacles and returning fire with harmless pellets. I spent a lot of time here before my first deployment — and every week since — but the simulated attacks don’t come close to the real thing.

I run over to the door that connects the sim course to the armory and swipe my key card. I select a weapon from the touchpad and check out an extra rifle for Blaze.

As soon as I finish, there’s a loud buzzing sound, and the drawer below the counter clicks into place. I open the small metal door and find two rifles and several extra mags ready to go. 

I toss Blaze some goggles and don a pair myself. He stretches the band absently, as though he wants to say something but isn’t sure if he should.

“Just so you know . . . I’m not as oblivious as everybody else is,” he murmurs. 

I feel my mouth fall open but quickly school my expression. “What?”

“People forget who my father is.”

I bite the inside of my mouth to keep myself from letting out a stream of vial words about Shane. He sent his men to kill me on Jayden’s orders. They dragged me to the dead level, bound me, and beat me. They would have finished the job, too, if Eli hadn’t intervened.

I know Blaze is nothing like his father, but it still awakens that fight-or-flight instinct inside me. “Trust me, I know who your father is.”

“Well, then you understand how being his son would give me a talent for knowing when people are lying to me. Parker wasn’t yelling at you because of the fight.”

“Sorry to disappoint you,” I say, choking out a fake laugh. “But you know how Eli is. Everything has to be his way.”

Blaze’s eyes flicker up to mine, and he’s wearing a knowing look that throws me off balance. It isn’t as intense or intimidating as Eli’s gaze, but his eyes reveal an unsettling amount of intuition and empathy. 

He
knows
there’s something going on with me and Eli — he just doesn’t know what.

It occurs to me that everybody underestimates Blaze because he’s quiet and easygoing, but he’s probably the most prepared for deployment. He’s fast and fit and surprisingly smart, but it’s his instincts that will save him out there.

Blaze lowers his gaze but still doesn’t put on his goggles. He seems to be lost in thought, battling some grand internal debate.

“Okay,” he says finally. “Just let me know if Parker gets to be too much for you.”

“Too much for me?”

He grins. “I know you’re tough, Harper. But he’s way too intense sometimes, and I don’t want him pushing you around just because he thinks he can.”

“Eli doesn’t —”

“Yeah, he does,” says Blaze, an uncharacteristic note of anger in his voice. “He thinks he can push you just because you push back, but that doesn’t make it right. He can be a real asshole sometimes.”

I can’t argue with that. Then again, I can be a real asshole, too.

Staring at Blaze, I suddenly have the feeling that I could tell him everything and he would understand. But I don’t.

He pulls on his goggles, and I can tell this conversation is over.

“Let me know,” he murmurs. “I’m not scared of him.”

five

Eli

“Explode off your feet!” I say for what feels like the hundredth time. “You’re gonna keep doing it until I see some real power, Horwitz.”

Across the training center, Lenny lets out an angry battle cry and aims a wild kick at the standup punching bag.

“Save it,” I say sharply, forcing myself to summon some patience. “You’re stuck here until you nail the whole sequence.”

Since Harper is working with Blaze on the sim course, today is the Lenny Horwitz show. Jayden plans on deploying Lenny and Blaze within a few weeks, and right now, Lenny is horribly unprepared for the Fringe. 

To wear her down and push her to the next level, I set up a hellacious obstacle course that runs the entire length of the training center. Lenny’s bum leg has always held her back on running and footwork, and everything on the course is designed for explosive speed and coordination. 

I’ve lined up two rows of tires for her to hop through and a series of progressively higher box jumps. As soon as she sticks the last one, Kindra is supposed to attack her, and Lenny has to deploy one of the self-defense maneuvers we’ve worked.

Then Bear throws a rope around her waist, and she has to fight his considerable weight to keep moving down the course. It ends with a side kick powerful enough to knock over the standing bag.

That’s how it’s
supposed
to go, anyway. She hasn’t knocked it over once, and the other two kind of suck at tough love. 

Kindra advances for the attack as though she’s going in for a hug, and Bear is being too easy on her. He throws Lenny an apologetic look as she aims another pitiful kick at the bag, and a stream of angry curses floats back to me.

“If you spent
half
as much time running the course as you spend complaining, you’d be done by now,” I yell.

Lenny stiffens. I can’t see her face, but I’m sure she’s rolling her eyes.

Finally she turns and shuffles back to where I’m standing. I can feel the frustration pouring off her, and her face is beet red from exhaustion. She’s making an effort, but she’s overthinking everything instead of just blazing through it.

“Nice try, Parker,” says a voice behind me. “But even
you
can’t fix two left feet.”

I turn around and instantly wish I hadn’t. Jayden’s lapdog, Seamus Duffy, is coming up behind me. 

Seamus used to be one of those annoyingly positive officers who went through the motions of training without ever forcing his cadets to make any real progress. All the higher-ups liked him because he did everything by the book, but I always knew he was full of shit.

When I was deployed, he took over training my squad. Then Jayden got her claws into him and started using him as her personal errand boy. The power must have gone to his head, because he went from being Mr. Sunshine to a cocky douchebag overnight.

“Kiss my ass, Duffy,” I call as soon as he’s within earshot.

“Ooh. Somebody’s testy this morning.”

“Because I know Jayden only lets you out of your cage to come annoy me. So get on with it. Some of us have work to do.”

“I can see that.” Seamus eyes Lenny up and down and wrinkles his freckly face into a condescending stare.

She glares daggers at him, which I find hilarious for some reason.

“Working hard, I see,” Seamus muses. “That’s good. I think your deployment date is coming up pretty soon.”

I step carefully between them before Lenny hurls an insult at Seamus and gets herself court-martialed. “Like I said . . . lots to do. So if you’ve come to
summon
me, let’s get it over with.”

I should get a medal for my saintlike self-control. 

“Who’s she going out with?” Seamus asks, referring to her partner on the Fringe. By his tone, he might as well have asked, “Who’s getting stuck with her?”

That pisses me off. 

“I don’t know,” I say, acting casual. “I thought maybe I’d ask Miles to show her the ropes.”

Seamus’s light-blond eyebrows shoot up in surprise, and Lenny looks just as shocked.

“Really?” she asks.

It’s no secret that Miles and I are best friends, and I knew Lenny would see that matchup as a major vote of confidence. I’m not sure if I suggested it to make her feel better or to take the wind out of Seamus’s sails, but either way, Miles is going to kill me.

“Yeah, why not?”

Lenny smirks at Seamus, and I swear she grows about three inches.

Seamus looks a little taken aback and turns his full attention to me. “The commander wants to see you for your briefing. I already sent Riley.”

“Another briefing?” I snap. “We were just deployed!”

He shrugs. “Crazy times.”

“I’ll be back,” I say to Lenny. “Keep running the course until you get it perfect. Then I want five miles from everyone.”

Bear and Kindra deflate a little, but Lenny is still glowing with pride.

Seamus leads the way out of the training center, but instead of heading to Jayden’s office, he turns down the tunnel toward the escalator.

“Where are we going?”

“The commander has a busy day lined up. She asked that you come to her while she’s making her rounds.”

“Making her rounds
where
?”

Seamus doesn’t answer, but it soon becomes clear as he leads me up to the wing above ExCon. There’s nothing over here except the loading bay.