Out of The Box Awakening (37 page)

“Jocelyn, you heard the man, get the hell out of here...now! You really don’t want to mess with me, trust me! Comprende sweetie?”

Ash steps in between us. “Jocelyn, why don’t you go get your things and we’ll have Ellen call a cab for you. It’s really time for you to go home.”

“Well, fuck you both! And Ash, you don’t know what you’re missing! Good luck with your little hick bitch. You two fucking deserve each other!” She turns, loses her balance, falls off of her high heels while leaving the room and we hear her stumble going down the stairs.

Ash takes me into his arms. “Honey that was one can of whoop-ass you opened on her! Damn, Liv!”

“Yeah, but she really deserved that. She needed to be put in her place, and I’ve been wanting to do that to her for quite a while. It felt good, and very liberating.”

Ash laughs, “My little kung fu! Coming to my rescue, protecting what’s yours! Have I told you that I love you, lately?”

“No. Tell me, because I really need to hear it about now.”

“Well, you fighting, ass-hot woman, I love you! Happy New Year!” He lifts me up in the air.

Ellen comes up to see what’s going on. “What the hell is going on with Jocelyn? She’s trashed!”

“Yeah, she just made a blooming fool of herself. I think it’s time she goes home. Maybe you can call her a cab?”

“David’s doing that right now. Man! What the hell came over her?”

“She was up here putting moves on Ash. It was disgusting!”

“Olivia almost whooped her butt! You should have seen it, Ellen!”

“Olivia, I’m so sorry. She’s had it bad for Ash for such a long time. He’s never given her the time of day, thank God. She’s a piece of work. We probably shouldn’t have even invited her. We know how she gets when she drinks. Sorry about all of this. I’ll go make sure the cab comes to get her.”

After Jocelyn is carted out in the cab, we all have coffee and dessert. Ellen has a martini ice cream bar set up, and it is fabulous! The band is still playing, so of course we take advantage and do some more dancing. Some of Ellen’s friends are talking about what an ass Jocelyn made of herself.

“Yeah, she’s something else when she gets a few drinks in her.” Libby says. “She’s such a drama queen! Always craving attention. She’s been like that since I’ve known her.”

Ash has the car brought around, and we head home. I have a missed text from Lainey. “Happy 2013 Mom and Ash! Having a blast! Stop by the club on your way home! We’ll be here for a while.” I tell Ash, and he suggests we do stop by for a little bit.

“You up for it?”

“Of course!”

When we get to the club, the kids are having drinks and enjoying the night.

“Olivia! Damn, look at you! You look friggin hot!” Todd says.

“Well, thank you, Mr. Bert!”

“So, gonna start calling me Bert?”

“No, nothing like that. Just messing with you!”

“So, wanna go grab a smoke?” he asks. “I’ve got a fresh pack.”

“Sure, big guy, that actually sounds pretty good. I’ll have to fill you in on my drama tonight.” I tell him about Jocelyn.

“No shit? The bitch was coming on to Mr. H.?”

“Oh, you have no idea how she was coming on to him. It was disgusting and I went off on her! I threw my drink in her face and slapped the crap out of her.”

“Damn! Wish I could have seen that! Seriously? You really slapped her in the face?” I nod yes. “Way to go, girl! Protecting what’s yours!” He tells me that they had a full house at the club. “You should have seen your daughter gettin’ down. She can fine-ass dance, Olivia! Must be hereditary.”

“So, Tommy and Emily? A good night?”

“Yeah, they were pretty much suckin’ face at midnight.”

“Awesome. So how’d it go with Wesley and Hayden?”

“The dickheads?” he asks. “Ha. Yeah. Well, I think they had a pretty good time. They tried to be all WestPoint at first, but then they kinda got into it. They danced with some girls and I think they had fun, actually. So tell me what you said to them to knock their asses off their thrones.”

I shake my head. “No can do. It’s a secret. It worked, and that’s all that matters!”

This, by far, was one of my favorite New Year’s Eves. I think back over the years and realize that Alan and I almost never went out. He didn’t like crowds or confusion and was content just watching TV and going to bed before midnight. He said he had to go out enough because of his job and staying at home was much better than going out. Matter of fact, I can’t remember the last time I was romantically kissed at the stroke of midnight. Another first for me tonight. Ash and I head home, both of us pretty tired and partied out. I change out of my beautiful Cinderella dress and am in just my panties. I pass by the bathroom and see Ash standing at the commode going to the bathroom. Suddenly, I get an idea.

I can do this, I think to myself. I walk up behind him, putting my arms around his waist, and we are skin to skin. The sensation is heavenly. He remarks, in his sexy voice, “Well, well, well…what a nice surprise! Miracles do happen.”

I smile and think to myself. “Oh, you have no idea!”

He carries me to bed and we are lying in my favorite position, his back to my front, skin to skin. “Liv?”

“Yesssss? Let me guess. You love me more than New Year’s?”

“No.”

“Well, what, then?”

“I was gonna tell you that I love you more than Christmas and New Year’s.”

“Ash?”

“Yessss?”

“I love you back, everything you just said and more!”

“Liv?”

“Yes?”

“I still believe you. Happy 2013!”

I’m getting really sad realizing that the kids have to head back home. And I mean the twins, as well as my kids. What started out as a really ugly situation has miraculously worked itself out. I feel comfortable that everyone had a good Christmas, including as me. My kids have exchanged numbers and social networking with the twins, and swear they will keep in touch. I think this really made Ash feel good. I know it was so hard for him to share his painful secret with me, and he seems to be a bit different, since. In a good way, I mean. It seems as though a load has been lifted off of his heart. I feel so bad that he’s kept this secret for so long. I can’t even imagine what he’s gone through.

As we head to the airport, I realize that the airport has become two things to me. My favorite place and my least favorite place. Favorite because I love when the kids arrive. It brings me such joy and happiness. Least favorite when we have to say goodbye, if only for a few months. It’s really been an adjustment for me to not have Lainey in the same city as me, because we used to talk or see each other every single day. Now, even though we do text every day, our conversations are not as frequent.

So, as I’m staring out the window on the way to my least favorite place, Ash asks me, “Honey, you okay?”

“Hmm? Oh, yes, of course. I was just thinking…”

He whispers, “Thinking of what a bummer it is that everyone’s leaving?”

“Yeah, something like that.”

He takes my hand and squeezes it. “I know, hon. It’s tough, but I think everyone had a nice time. You can take credit for that.”

I smile.

When we get to the airport, Ash drops Lainey and me off. The skycap comes to get all the luggage. He goes to park the car. Lainey and I venture into the airport, and she looks me in the eye.

“Mom, this was a wonderful Christmas! Please, I can tell by the look on your face that you’re getting all ‘Mom’ on us. We’re going home, yes, but you’ll be coming when the baby is born. You and Ash can come in for a weekend before, too. I know he’ll be down for that!”

“Yeah, I know. I just…I’ll just miss you guys so much!”

Ash and the guys find us. My boys both grab arms around me.

“Mom, stop freaking out! Geez! We’re only a flight away. You and Ash are welcome to come visit any time you want.”

“Y’all are coming in when the baby is born, aren’t you?” The way Lainey puts it, it’s not a question, it’s a command.

“Oh, hells yeah!” Bradley says. Dalton tells her, “I’ve already put the office on notice. I’ll be there for sure!”

Bradley has a two-hour wait for his flight, and Dalton leaves forty-five minutes after Lainey.

“So, Dalton, you excited about moving into your new place?” Lainey asks.

“Yeah! For sure. So glad to be back in the states. Oklahoma is close, so I’ll fly in whenever I can, and y’all have to come visit me. And Lainey, you’re only about seven hours from Tulsa. We can meet in Dallas or Fort Worth. Billy Bob’s Baby!”

“I’m so down, brother!”

They all group hug and at this moment, I realize just how lucky I am to have kids who are so close. I only hope that Ash’s boys will keep in touch and develop or re-develop their
relationship. In spite of the nasty secret Ash has kept, they are still brothers. Maybe not biological, but still family.

All the flights eventually leave. It’s just Ash and me.

“So, Olivia, you okay?” He pulls me to his side and gives me a hug.

“I’m totally okay. It’s just that goodbyes are really hard for me.”

“They’re not goodbyes, hon, they’re ‘see you soons’! Come on. Let’s head home. Wanna grab some dinner first?”

“Ummm..I’d love that!”

We have a wonderful dinner at a local chophouse. In my mind, I’m thinking of how fast the holidays have gone by. It seems like just yesterday we were having Thanksgiving dinner!

“Ash, I think the twins had a nice Christmas after all, don’t you?”

“Olivia, to tell you the truth, I can’t believe it. I don’t know what you did, but it worked. What exactly did you do?”

“I’ll tell you just like I told Todd. ‘Not telling’. It worked, and that’s all that really matters.”

“Okay. I get it. Fair enough.”

We talk about the twins and Ash’s secret. “So, since I’ve told you everything, you don’t think any less of me, do you?”

I put my hand through his arm and look him straight in the eye. “Ash, I can honestly say that when you shared your secret, it made me love you all the more, if that’s even possible.”

“Honey, I want you to know that a huge burden has been lifted off me. I’ve been carrying that for so damn long. I was just afraid that once I told you, you would just bail on me!”

“There’s no chance of that, Ash! You’ve got me forever! I promise.”

As we’re waiting on the car to be brought around, Ash says. “Oh, I totally forgot to tell you. I don’t even know if Emily knows yet. Dominic called me earlier today. Seems Tony got into a fight in jail and was stabbed. Fatally, I’m sorry to say. It’s a shame that his life was so messed up. Dominic thinks the fight was drug related.”

“Do you think they’ll let Emily know? Because I know it will probably be a relief to her. Even though it’s a tragic end to his life, she can be assured that he won’t bother her anymore. I think she lives in fear that he’ll get out of jail and come after her again.”

“I’ll call Dominic in the morning and see if they’ve let her know. For sure though, we won’t have to worry about him again.”

We talk about the impending divorce and my health. I don’t know why, but the subject of my health has been something he just won’t back off of.

“So, hon, you promised me before Christmas that you’d make an appointment and get a physical. Don’t mean to hound you, but… “

“Well, you can cross that off your list, because I’ve scheduled appointments for next week. Happy?”

“Totally! Did you find out if you are still on Alan’s insurance?”

“Yes. Until the divorce he still has me on his policy. I also talked to Abbey and she said Alan has to keep me on his insurance until I can get another policy. I’ll start looking for coverage to be effective after the divorce. By the way, Abbey says that Alan has agreed to all the terms we’ve requested, so basically things are moving forward. She thinks we just may get this thing finalized by the first week in February.”

“Oh my God, honey! That’s wonderful! And as far as the insurance, I just don’t want there to be any lapse in coverage. I’m not trying to be a control freak or anything; I just think you need to get these things taken care of.”

“I don’t think you’re being controlling; I know you’re just doing this because you care about me.”

“Ummm, I more than care about you, honey! I want you healthy, so we can spend the rest of our lives together.”

He squeezes my hand and gives me that damn sexy wink. It has me every time!

During the night, I wake up and am nauseous. I can’t remember the last time I woke up during the night feeling sick. I lie there for a while, hoping it will go away. I haven’t felt like this in a very long time, and immediately, I think food poisoning. I try to go back to sleep but I can’t. I feel so yuck. I’m never sick. As matter of fact; I can’t even remember the last time I threw up.

Ash is fast asleep, so I don’t want to wake him, but I think I have to throw up. I catapult out of bed and run into the bathroom. Thank God! I make it just in time and throw up the entire contents of my stomach and then some, I think. I have a horrible pain in my side and am heaving. Ash hears me, gets out of bed and comes into the bathroom.

“Hon, you okay?”

“Ummm, yeah, I think so. I don’t know what happened. I just woke up and I feel so bad. I’ll be okay, though. Just give me a minute.”

This is totally embarrassing. I’m puking my guts up, and right now, I just want to be left alone. I stay in the bathroom for a really long time. My face feels hot, and I think I have fever.

“Honey, I’m worried. Are you sure you’re okay?”

“Yes, Ash! Just give me a minute please!”

The one thing I don’t want to do right now is talk. Geez!

I think I’m finished; grab a damp washcloth, and head back to bed. As soon as I get back into bed, I realize I have to throw up again. I run back into the bathroom and Ash follows on my heels.

“Liv, maybe you have the flu. Here, let me wipe your head.” He feels my head. “Honey, you’ve got fever, you’re burning up! Let me get you something.”

“I honestly don’t think I can keep anything down, Ash. I just feel so bad. I haven’t thrown up in forever!”

I think I’m finished, so I get back into bed and I try to sleep, but my side is killing me. I start shivering. The pain gets progressively worse.

“Liv, did you just start feeling bad?”

“Yeah, kind of. My side has been hurting me for about a week, and I’ve been nauseous off and on for the past few days, but I thought it was just nerves. I’ll be fine, really. If I can just get to sleep I’ll be fine, really.”

Ash lies by me and keeps rubbing my head. I have to throw up again, and run back into the bathroom. He’s right behind me. I try to close the door but he holds it open with his foot. “Don’t close the door, Liv. Obviously, something’s wrong. This isn’t normal. We should go to the emergency room.”

“Absolutely not! I probably just have a virus, or like you said, the flu. I’ll be fine. Geez! Just let me puke in privacy please! Go back to bed. I’ll be in shortly.”

He goes back to bed, leaving me to my misery. I doze off and on, while hugging the commode. The pain is getting really bad. I can feel my fever getting worse and now I’m getting scared. This doesn’t feel like a bug or a virus. I cry out in pain and Ash comes running. “Honey, that’s it. I’m taking you to the hospital.”

“No! I’m fine. Please! Just go back to bed!”

“Well, I tried going back to bed, but you’re in here heaving your guts up and I can tell you’re in pain. This isn’t normal Liv! I know you know that, too. So stop being so stubborn!”

I try to get up, in an attempt to prove him wrong, but dammit! I fall down. The pain is now unbearable, and I start crying.

“Here, honey, hold on to me.” He props me up on the bed and quickly throws on a pair of sweats, a T-shirt and some flip-flops. He then carefully gets me into a pair of sweats, one of his button down shirts and my house shoes. He carries me downstairs and sits me in a chair. “I’m going to get the car. Just sit here.”

He brings the car, puts me in the front seat and reclines the seat back. I’m hurting so bad; I don’t think I can sit up straight. He’s on the phone while we’re driving. “Malcolm? Hey, buddy, it’s Ash Harper. Yeah, sure has. It’s been a while. Listen, sorry to call you so late. My girlfriend, Olivia, and I are on the way to Highland Park. Something’s wrong with her. I don’t know if it’s her appendix or gall bladder, but something’s definitely wrong. She’s in a lot of pain, fever, and has been throwing up nonstop for a few hours. Can you meet us there? Yeah, we’re probably ten minutes out. Okay, thanks, man! Appreciate it.”

I have to throw up again and start gagging. “Ash, I have to throw up! I’m so sorry! I don’t want to get it in your car! Can you pull over?”

“No worries, hon. Here.” He hands me a little trashcan. “You can use this. If you need me to pull over, let me know. It’s okay. Really.”

Arghhhhh! This is so humiliating! Another first, albeit a crappy one! We finally pull up at the emergency room entrance and the staff has been put on notice and is ready to assist. Ash is there with me all the way. He takes my purse as they put me in a wheelchair.

“Ash, this isn’t necessary, really I can walk!”

“Don’t pull that crap with me, Olivia! It’s not gonna work. Sit still.”

They rush me back into an exam room and ask Ash to wait outside for a few minutes. Ash pulls out my phone to call Alan. They’ve given him paperwork to fill out, and he realizes that he knows nothing about my medical history or how to properly answer the information on the forms. He dials Alan’s number from my phone.

Alan answers.“Hey babe. What’s up?”

“It’s not Olivia, Alan, its Ash.”

“Uhhhh, hello Ash. Is everything okay?”

“Look. We’re at the emergency room. I think Olivia has appendicitis. I’ve got to fill out these medical forms and I need her medical history information.” Alan is silent.. “Alan? Can you answer these questions so I can fill out the forms?”

“Ummm…”

“Well, can you help me out here? They need medical information. You should also probably head over here in case they need authorization to treat. We’re at Highland Park Hospital on Park Avenue.”

“Well, Ash, honestly, I don’t know…what specifically do you need to know?”

“Her goddamn medical history Alan! Does she have allergies? Her birth date? Blood type? Medications? Prior surgeries? You know, the things a husband should know. Help me out here, Alan! I need to get this done fast.”

“Well, ummm let’s see…uhhh”

“Goddammit! Alan… tell me you actually know something about your wife! I’ve got to get these forms filled out and I goddamn need your help!”

“Uh, Ash, I honestly don’t know. I’m sorry, but I just don’t. We just never, well…”

“Forget it! I’ll call Lainey. She probably knows a hell of a lot more about her than you do anyway. I suggest you get your ass over here in case they need next of kin permission. Geez! I can’t friggin believe you’re such a big help! Just get here now!”

“Okay, I’m on my way!”

Ash hangs up the phone and calls Lainey.

“Mom?”

“No, Lainey, it’s Ash. Look, we’re at the emergency room. Your mom is sick. I think it may be appendicitis, but they don’t know for sure yet. She’s in the exam room now.”

“Oh, my God! What?”

“Look, honey, I’ll explain in a bit, but I’m trying to fill out these medical forms. I called your dad first. He’s goddamn clueless, and I just need some help here. Can you help me with this, honey?”

“Of course I will! What do you need to know? Start reading and I’ll give you the answers.”

Ash reads the forms to her and she helps him get them filled out. Of course she knows the answer to every single question.

“Okay, Lainey, let me get these forms turned in and I’ll call you right back. I’ve called a friend of mine who’s one of the top surgeons here, and he’s on the way. Don’t know anything now honey, but I’ll keep you posted.”

“Ash, what can I do? She’ll be okay, won’t she?”

“Honey, just sit tight. Nothing we can do until we know what’s wrong with her. She woke up during the night and couldn’t stop throwing up. She has bad pain in her side and a high fever. She’s exactly where she needs to be and I can promise you, she’s got the best doctors taking care of her. That’s all I know for now. Oh, and could you please call your brothers and let them know?”

“Of course! Just keep me posted. I can get a flight out whenever. Tell her that I love her. Please, call me as soon as you have any news!”

“Will do, honey. Let me go see what’s going on. I’ll be in touch!”

“Thanks so much Ash. Talk to you soon.”

The surgeon comes out to talk to Ash.

“Malcolm, thanks so much for coming. What’s wrong with my girl?”

“Well, first of all, she’s very, very lucky that she got here when she did. Looks like a ruptured gall bladder, and we need to get that sucker out ASAP. Look, Ash, I need to get scrubbed
and into surgery. Don’t mean to rush out, but we’ve got to get moving here. I’ll have someone keep you updated. They’re taking her up now to surgery. She’s sedated and comfortable. She’s in good hands, my friend.”

“Malcolm, can I just see her before she goes in?”

“Sure thing, follow me.” He takes Ash to the elevator. Just as they’re wheeling me out, I look up and see Ash. I try to speak, but I’m too weak and lightheaded. I know tears are coming out of my eyes and I’m scared. Everything is happening so fast. He looks so worried as well.

“Liv, honey, don’t talk. Everything’s gonna be fine. I promise. I’ll be here. Remember that I love you!” He kisses my cheek. Dr. Scott gives Ash thumbs up.

“Okay. Ash, we’re outta here! Gotta get this little lady into surgery!”

“Just take good care of her!”

“Will do, my friend!”

Dr. Scott rushes back into the surgery area, where they take me as well.

“Olivia, I’m Dr. Malcolm Scott. I’m a good friend of Ash’s; I say that because I hope he considers me a good friend!” He chuckles. I can tell he is trying to make light of things so I won’t panic. “Anyhow, I promise, we’re gonna get that nasty gall bladder out soon. I know you’re in pain and we’ll make sure we take good care of you. Ash is in the waiting room, and I know he sure loves you.”

“Did he call my kids?”

“He’s taken care of everything. I can promise you. I’ve known the man for years, and he’s a stickler for details.” He laughs again, and then says, “You just relax and you’ll be fixed up in no time.”

I look up at the ceiling. This is surreal. I’ve never had surgery before. Never been in an operating room except for when I had my kids. There is classical music playing. Everyone is doing their job. Running around, getting instruments ready, and talking small talk. Dr. Scott is talking with the nurses. He is reading charts and x-rays, commenting to the nurses and doctors.

“Wow! This is some nasty booger!” Dr. Scott says.

I wonder what that means. The music is soothing. I can tell Dr. Scott is respected by his colleagues. They remove the blankets from me. They pull my hospital gown up and I and totally at their mercy. It’s cold, really cold in here. Nurses start by putting an IV in my hand. I start shivering and one of the nurses bends down to me. “Olivia, I know it’s cold in here. We’re just
about ready to get started. Dr. Scott is the absolute best surgeon there is! You’re in excellent hands. Are you ready?”

I nod yes. The anesthesiologist starts the drip.

“Olivia, okay, I need you to count backwards for me, honey.”

Everyone is calling me sweetie or honey. In my mind, I feel at ease and in good hands. They’re going to take care of me. In classic Olivia mode, I start to over-think things. There are so many things I didn’t get to say to everyone. What happens if I never wake up again? I didn’t get to talk to my kids. I didn’t get the chance to tell them how much I love them and just how much they mean to me. I didn’t tell Ash how much I love him. My affairs are not in order. I’m unorganized. Please, please, just let me wake up after this!

“Okay, Olivia, count with me…Ten, nine, eight…”

I start to count and am immediately under. My life is in their hands.

I wake up in recovery. My mouth is so dry and I’m nauseous. Why am I still nauseous? Oh my God! I have a tube in my mouth, and I gag.

“Olivia…you’re in recovery, sweetie. They removed your gall bladder. You’re fine now. Try and stay still,” the nurse says.

I motion to her that I need to throw up…I gag again. She comes over and helps me with the tube.

“It’s a reaction to the anesthesia, sweetie. Just relax.”

Somehow, I doze back to sleep, and when I wake up, I’m in my room. Even though I’m pretty groggy, I see beautiful flowers all over the room. Ash and Alan are both there. Ash is at my side, rubbing my head softly. He bends down and whispers in my ear.

“Hey there, Sunshine! You sure had me scared there for a while.”

I shake my head. Alan comes over to the bed.

“Olivia, hi. How ya doing?”

I know I look at Ash with a totally confused look on my face and I wonder what the hell he’s doing here. I realize Ash probably called him.

“Uggghhh. Feel bad. Hurt.”

I start to cry. Ash signals for the nurse to come in.

Alan steps to the door and says, “I think I’ll just step outside. I’ll be in the waiting room if you need me.”

Ash tells the nurse, “She’s really in pain; can you give her something please?”