Out of Exodia (26 page)

He offers me Eli and I scoop him into
my arms and rest my trembling lips on his head. Gresham whips his
head around to watch us. Lydia holds her hands open to him and he
doesn’t hesitate to leave his grandfather’s arms and cuddle up to
her; her smile is irresistible.

Katie introduces her husband to us and
then she asks for help to shepherd their sheep that trail behind
them. They don’t respond to her singing, she says, like they did to
Kassandra’s. She drops her voice on her sister’s name. I lift my
mouth from my son’s scalp and call out to several people nearby who
were good with the horses and assign them to help her. I’m glad for
the interruption in this upsetting reunion.

Chapter 18 The End

From the last page of the
fourth Ledger:

The shepherd led them in. He
made them lie down in the green pastures. Their souls were
restored.

THIS HAS BEEN the best and worst week
of this journey for me. Days are spent helping to care for my sons
as Katie relinquishes her unwanted maternal role and Lydia accepts
her step-sons with more love than I could wish for. The days, even
though we travel through some rough areas, are the best. The nights
are the worst. Gresham and Eli cry for their mother and wake me
from nightmares of a hellish fire. Night after night I return to
dreams that make my soul howl. Fears, regrets, deaths, failures.
Faithlessness. Always I am comforted as I hold my sleepless sons
and savor their innocence.

“
You were pretty restless
last night,” Lydia says, coaxing me to speak. “Dreams, nightmares,
or visions?”

I hadn’t thought of these episodes as
visions. I’ve had visions before, conscious scenes that play out
before my eyes, but now I wonder about these nighttime tableaus.
Another gemfry trait?

“
I saw Harmon’s death,” I
say. “Clearly it was a vision. The whole Red community set out from
the iron lodges, headed to the mountain. God met us at the fence,
spoke from the cloud.” I look away as I remember the emotion that
filled my sleeping heart.

“
Go on.”

“
The voice said that Harmon
would not enter the land prepared for us. He would not enter
because he and I rebelled against the commands. The voice told me
to take Harmon’s shirt and put it on his son. I was to take Harmon
and his son up the mountain. All the Reds watched us ascend. When
we got to the top Harmon died.”

“
How?”

“
I don’t know. He just
died. There. On top of the mountain. And I came down with his
son.”

“
And then what?” Lydia
pulls the story from my reluctant lips, her own lips graze the head
of Eli as she holds him.

“
And then we mourned him
for thirty days.”

“
The dream means something.
Why did he die and not you, if you both broke laws?”

“
I don’t know. Maybe I was
next.”

“
Well, it was just a dream.
He hasn’t died.”

I nod my head. Just a dream. Right. But
it was something else, too. I can’t explain it. It’s like my vision
was of a path that split off in two directions and I could see
where the trail would have ended in the path I didn’t
take.

The last vision was even worse. But now
is not the time to tell my beautiful wife.

Katie’s husband, Jessie, nears our
tent. He has a favor to ask.

* * *

By the week’s end the Reds found their
way to the hilltop where the twelve scouts had spied on the land.
Josh and Blake told everyone the place had a name, at least
according to what they could figure out when they explored. But
they weren’t sure of the pronunciation. It didn’t matter what it’s
name was, most agreed, just as long as they were far enough away
from Exodia.

“
We march down right now,”
Bram hollered. Malcolm’s box amplified his voice to reach every
ear.

The cloud spread out above them and
then floated down the hillside. It swept out over the expanse of
land as far as they could see, hid the land from their eyes for a
moment, and then melted into the earth. Malcolm’s box thrummed
louder than ever and caused the people’s anxious and excited shouts
to carry down into the farthest parts of the valley. They didn’t
waste another moment. They charged down like warriors, leading the
horses and sheep where the incline was most dangerous. They went
faster than they should have but they never stopped shouting. The
thunderous entrance of the thousands of Reds was met with fear and
retreat. The giants took off in swarms on foot, or on bikes, cars,
even planes, and abandoned the lush ready-to-be-harvested land
without putting up a fist or aiming a weapon.

“
Just like that?” Harmon
laughed. “It was that easy?”

Mira began to dance.

* * *

My sister pulls me forward and dances
around me. She waves her arms and moves her feet to rhythms only
she can hear, but there’s a seductive cadence to her steps and soon
a line of people join in. They twirl and jump and clap. Women bring
out twelve banners and I notice they are new with intricate
designs: a lion, a horse, and a lamb are boldly outlined on three
of them. Three others in shades of green show a mountain, a train,
and an iron lodge. I wonder how they managed to sew these and keep
them secret from me. I suspect that Onita used her talent to quilt
these works of art. Five more banners show five more important
events of our months on the trail. The last one shows a snake on a
pole. It must have been created just this past week.

The judges each grab a banner and head
in different directions, some toward the farms and orchards, some
toward the cities, some farther on, intent to settle in as quickly
as possible. The people follow their own judge. Vinn and Carter and
their friends join Malcolm as he locks step behind Harmon. I’m glad
they choose to be with us.

Suddenly my breath catches in my chest.
The loathsome second vision presses to the forefront of my mind. I
drop the reins and let my horse follow them on his own.

“
Bram. Bram.” Lydia’s voice
pierces my trance, but I can’t come out of it. I see two paths.
Clear as anything. Two paths. But one leads to something
horrendous. Flames lick the feet of people of every race and
culture, Reds, Blues, Grays, giants, men, children, me, Lydia, my
sons. Souls. Alive. Dying but alive. The flames curl upward and
devour these live souls midst anguished bawling. A silvery voice
blackens my thoughts with a perverse phrase:
“Here in fire wild, live souls howl.”

“
Bram!”

At last I see the reality before me
again: Lydia’s beautiful face, worried; her mother, Jenny, staring
at me with heightened concern; Harmon waving the rod in front of my
face, the banner limp; and Raul nodding, smiling, jiggling my sons.
He knows what I’ve seen.

“
Sorry,” I say, turning my
head to fill my eyes with Lydia’s comforting beauty. “It was like
the shadow of death flew over me as soon as we made it to this
valley. I wasn’t supposed to make it, was I?” I look to Raul. “You
must have read this in the stars.” His scarred face scrunches tight
and he slowly shakes his head.

“
No,” he says. “But
Kassandra read it to me from the first ledger. There are two paths
to every man’s life. You choose.”

“
The ledger?” I look around
at all the faces staring at me, all from my brother’s tribe. Lydia
fusses with a sack on her horse and produces the pages I stole over
four years ago.

I don’t know why I didn’t see it
before. I reread the first page of the first ledger:

The black voice said, “Live
in fire, wild, souls howl here.”

There are two paths to every
man’s life. Some choose hell when heaven is a father’s house. The
upright say aloud, “I will dwell in his house forever.”

So I say it aloud, the perfect anagram
to what the black voice said and the first line of the ledger, “I
will dwell in his house forever.”

“
Whose house?” Jenny
asks.

I look at the city before us, so
recently abandoned by men bigger than I. A certain building stands
out, a place of worship.

“
That house.” I wasn’t
supposed to make it. I’ve been faced with two paths every minute of
my life; I saw in a vision how my life might have ended. And how
Harmon would have died, too. Outside. We wouldn’t have been allowed
to enter this promised land. But here I am with a wife and two sons
and all the happiness my heart can hold and I know exactly where I
will dwell forever.

Other Books by Debra
Chapoton are available at
Smashwords
and other online
retailers:

EXODIA

A SOUL’S KISS

SHELTERED

THE GUARDIAN’S DIARY

EDGE OF ESCAPE

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