Our First Love (24 page)

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Authors: Anthony Lamarr

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“I'm sorry,” Nigel responded. “I've been dealing with some personal problems today. I know I should have called, but…”

“Don't worry about it. I have you covered,” Hubert cut him off. “I rescheduled your exams for tomorrow since my schedule is open. I stopped by to pick up the exam, and to make sure you and Caleb were okay.”

“We will be,” Nigel said as he walked into the den. “Let me get the exams.”

“I spoke to Karen last week,” Hubert told Nigel.

I tiptoed into the hallway and backed into a shadowed corner. I saw Hubert standing near the door. I'd seen him during his class lectures on TV, but he looked different in person. Taller. More self-assured. And a decade younger than his forty-nine years. An aura of fulfillment resonated from within him. Clearly, he was a man who loved his life.

“How is she?” Nigel returned with a small box.

“She's heartbroken. Missing you.” Hubert smiled teasingly. “I promised her I wouldn't say anything, but I have to say this. You don't have to avoid her. She knows more than you think she does. And she understands.” Hubert grinned and patted Nigel on the shoulder. “She loves you even more now that she knows you spent a few weeks covertly pursuing her before you finally stepped to her.”

You could've scraped the embarrassment off of Nigel's face.

“Don't go getting uptight,” Hubert advised. “You have nothing to worry about. She loves you, Nigel.”

Nigel gave Hubert the box and said, “Thanks. I owe you.”

“Then pay me back by calling her. Like I told you before,
she's a keeper. Trust me on this.” Hubert smiled encouragingly. “I'll call before I bring the exams back tomorrow afternoon.”

“I assumed you were going to grade them, too.”

“When did hell freeze over?”

Nigel grinned and followed Hubert to the door.

“I told Karen you'd be in touch with her soon,” Hubert said.

I slipped back into my bedroom and closed the door. I didn't have to hear the front door open and close to know that Nigel and I were alone again…alone in our amputated world.

We're never unchained.

CHAPTER 27

T
ake care of your brother. Those were their mother's last words, and Nigel did as he was instructed. He took care of Caleb. Shared his life. Sacrificed dreams. Threw away ambition. And love. All unselfishly.

After learning the truth about that December night fourteen years ago, Caleb felt it was his turn to take care of Nigel because too much of Nigel's life had been lived behind briar-covered walls, too much of his life still unlived. Caleb saw the life he wanted for Nigel when Hubert stopped by the house. Hubert was cloaked in happiness, and Caleb wanted to see Nigel adorned in similar attire. So, he set about tailoring a new life for his brother.

Caleb knew from having shared it that there were two things missing from Nigel's life. The main thing missing from Nigel's life was the freedom to live his life unburdened by the past. The revelations of that December night fourteen years ago had already taken care of that. When Caleb learned the truth about that night, Nigel was released from the burden of secrecy. The only other thing missing from Nigel's life was someone to share it with. Caleb came up with a plan to change that.

That night, when he figured the odds were as close to even as they would get that Nigel was asleep, Caleb tiptoed out of his bedroom, down the hallway, into the living room. He took the phone off of the stand and walked over to the black recliner by the front window. His eyes were drawn to the closed curtains. He parted
the curtains with his index finger, and then, with some hesitance, he leaned forward and peered outside at the muddy bottom of Flatley Creek. He was even more convinced that what he was about to do was the only way to save his brother. He picked up the receiver and dialed her number. Since it was a few minutes past midnight, he figured she was sleep. And she was until the phone beside her bed rang.

“Hello,” she answered.

“Karen,” his voice wobbled. “This is Caleb. Nigel's brother.”

He could hear Karen the alertness in her voice when she asked, “Is everything okay, Caleb?”

“It is now,” he said. “I'm sorry about waking you.”

“Don't be,” she responded. “I'm glad you called.”

After Caleb and Karen had finished talking, Caleb lay in bed and scoured away the memories of making love to her. He said goodbye to the woman of his dreams and hello to his friend and their savior.

Karen drove past their house three times before her nerves and the morning traffic settled enough to let her turn into the driveway. As she pulled in the driveway behind the black Lumina, she glimpsed a man standing at the front window, staring out through the partially opened curtains. It wasn't Nigel. She was relieved.

A few seconds before the doorbell rang, Nigel heard Caleb run down the hallway and then he heard Caleb's bedroom door close. He debated whether he should get up and see who was at the front
door or pull the blanket back over his head and pretend he didn't hear the doorbell. The doorbell rang again, and again, ending Nigel's deliberation. He climbed out of bed and tottered toward the living room. Nigel didn't bother to look through the peephole before he opened the door. He wished he had.

“Good morning.” She greeted him with a timid smile. “Caleb invited me over for breakfast. May I come inside?”

“Of course,” he answered. “Come in.”

Neither Nigel nor Karen expected what happened next. But as soon as Karen stepped past Nigel and inside the doorway into their world, her repressed feelings spilled over. “I love you, Nigel,” she cried and flung her arms around him. “I love you.”

Nigel tried to speak, to tell her how he felt, but he couldn't.

So she spoke for him. “I know,” Karen professed. “I know that you love me. And that's why I'm here.”

The elation in his eyes validated her.

She kissed him, softly at first.

He pulled her closer. Close enough to feel her heart beating. He embraced her love, silently thanking God for her.

Caleb smiled as he stood in the living room staring at Nigel and Karen. The door was wide open, but the asphyxiating world outside 207 Circle Drive could not flow past the dams in the doorway. Love. Happiness. Hope. Tomorrow. All dams.

Welcome to our life.

EPILOGUE

After every ending there was a beginning, and this was how our next life would begin.

Fleeing yesterday. Surviving today. Chancing tomorrow. That was how we once lived. Constricted by time and enslaved by memories. But no more. We vowed to change the way we inhabited our stay here. We resolved to seek freedom from our lives. To venture without reason. Pursue possibility. Cater to love. And to not merely exist. No longer would we haul the burdensome heft of our yesterdays into today. This time we would live free.

Truth was all we're carrying into our new lives. Truth; it was an inescapable cage. And how well we accepted this reality determined the inviolable boundaries of our world.

This was the truth…the only truth that mattered.

My brother was beside me when our life ended.

He was with me when this new life began.

He is with me now.

And I will be with him always.

Always.

ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

I'm forever grateful to…

My Heavenly Father

For Life, Love, Blessings, and Dreams.

&

My Mother, Delores

My Grandmothers, Doris and Thelma

For being my unfailing rocks.

&

My Father, Tyrone

My Grandfathers, Willie “Bean” and Lester

For being my steadfast roots.

&

Mrs. Muriel Mixon

(my third-grade teacher)

For opening the door to the world of books with Amelia Earhart's story.

&

You

(one of my Blessings)

For loving me during the hours.

Credit: Wayne Dunwoody

Anthony Lamarr
is a native of North Florida, where he still resides. He is a graduate of the University of Florida College of Journalism and Communications. A novelist, screenwriter, and playwright, Lamarr is author of the novel,
The Pages We Forget.

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