Oral Sex for Every Body: Giving and Receiving for Men and Women

GIVING AND RECEIVING FOR MEN AND WOMEN

TIN A ROB B INS

TR A NS L ATE D
BY
TI M BA R A LI
S

Skyhor
s
n
c
Publishing

Original title: DEVÓRAME

© 2008 by Editorial Océano, S.L. (Barcelona, Spain)

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Illustrations: Xavier Bou

English translation © 2014 by Skyhorse Publishing

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Cover design by Rain Saukas Cover photo credit Thinkstock ISBN: 978-1-62914-476-4

E-book ISBN: 978-1-63220-077-8

Printed in the United States of America

Contents
INTRODUCTION FOREPLAY

GOOD COMMUNICATIONS PROCEED WITH CALM USING ALL FIVE SENSES THE ART OF CARESSING

TANTRIC MASSAGE FOR COUPLES TURNING UP THE HEAT

TANTRIC CARESSES AN ADDED PLEASURE SAFE ORAL SEX

KISS ME AGAIN AND AGAIN! SOUL KISSING

DEVOUR HIM/HER WITH DIFFERENT KINDS OF KISSES

DO YOU KNOW THE THREE P’S + C?

SKIN DEEP

YOU’VE GOT TEETH, USE THEM! AN EXPLOSIVE PROCESS SETTING THE STAGE

LOOK AT YOURSELF, LOOK AT YOUR PARTNER THE POWER OF DÉCOR

SEXY UNDERTHINGS LINGERIE FOR ALL TASTES YOUR “DOWN THERE” LOOK THE SCENT OF SEX TANTRIC AROMAS

THE FENG SHUI OF SEX POSITIONING THE BED BREAKING THE ROUTINE OLD FRIENDS EROGENOUS TERRITORY SKIN

HAIR

EYES AND FACE LIPS

NECK, NAPE, AND SHOULDERS EARS

BACK RUMP ARMS WRISTS HANDS BREASTS ABDOMEN NAVEL CROTCH THIGHS ANKLES FEET

KEEP TOUCHING ME!

ORGASM: AN EXPLOSION OF PLEASURE

THE BEST TECHNIQUES OTHER RESOURCES MASSAGING THE “YONI” JUST ABOUT HIM

CENTER OF HIS UNIVERSE

MASSAGING THE “LINGAM”

FELLATIO: MAKE HIM MELT WITH PLEASURE! DIFFERENT FELLATIO TECHNIQUES

HOW DOES SEMEN TASTE? TASTES AND SMELLS TRICKS OF THE TRADE ERRORS TO AVOID

GET COMFORTABLE ORAL KAMA SUTRA

POSITIONS FOR CUNNILINGUS ADVICE FOR GUYS

POSITIONS FOR FELLATIO RED HOT!

INDECENT PROPOSALS BREAKFAST IN BED THE “BLACK KISS” CHANGE OF SCENERY

HOW TASTY!

DOUBLE YOUR PLEASURE THE MOST SENSUAL PIERCING HOW ABOUT A SHOWER?

NAUGHTY PHONE SEX DEEP THROAT

TWO FOR THE PRICE OF ONE ORAL TANTRA

Introduction

When we are eating something we enjoy we often say: “This melts in your mouth.” We are satisfied and we “savor” the experience. Enjoyment, savor, mouth, and satisfaction; I cannot find better words to begin this hopefully provocative guide about one of the most pleasurable sexual practices there is: oral sex.

Leave all timidity behind and prepare to take advantage of the most thrilling techniques, the most voluptuous kissing and caressing, all designed to drive your lover absolutely wild. This is a complete guide to learning how to both give and take, the most important aspect of oral sex being to join with your partner in climactic union, and getting there by engaging the five senses in a total communion.

Often we find ourselves burdened with inhibitions, taboos, or bouts of shyness, all of which hinder our relationships. If this is the case with you, then you have found the perfect book. Keep reading, and you will learn to free your body to go beyond your mental limits and completely enjoy an exciting session of oral lovemaking. Passionate sexual play enables us to explore our partner’s body and feelings. It is a time for letting the imagination fly and for abandoning oneself completely to caresses, kisses, whispers, nibbles, and massages, all of which are part of the thrilling art of oral sex.

I will explain it all, step by step, without any hurry. Haste, indeed, is the worst enemy of sex. We are going to relish every moment, every gesture, each caress, allowing ourselves to unlock the most carefully guarded secrets of our deepest

desire. Chapter by chapter we will go forward, sorting out the preliminaries, the different techniques (whether for him or her), different positions, the erogenous zones so enthralling to your lover, and a long list of fantasies and role playing which will enable you to enjoy sex as never before.

All will be presented in a form that is both pleasant and fun, for this is exactly what we are talking about: having great fun, and freeing oneself from hang ups, allowing yourself to be carried away by the moment. Oral sex is the most intimate and sensual form of contact, more so even than intercourse itself. To be brought to orgasm or to bring someone else to orgasm requires certain skills. No one is born with these skills and too many times we feel inhibited in communicating to our lover what we like or what excites us and ignites our passion. This play of strokes, rubs, kisses, wandering hands, lips, and tongue over the most sensitive parts of your partner will make your relationship much more fulfilling.

I suggest that you and your lover read this book together. I offer it for couples who wish to bring more creativity into their relationships, for self-conscious lovers who have yet to allow themselves to fully let go, for singles who want to try new things, and, generally, for all those who love good sex, in all its splendor!

Foreplay
‌

Many couples believe that foreplay, that magic opportunity for seduction when the five senses begin to awaken sexual desire, starts with direct stimulation of the genitals, or, worse still, oral sex itself.

Oral sex, as its name clearly indicates, is sex, and therefore doesn’t count as foreplay. Sure, sometimes you crave a “quicky,” and this certainly can result in a satisfying experience. But, in general, a sensual and slow dalliance helps open up our senses as well as better prepare us for orgasm.

We are talking here about caressing, kissing, murmurings, erotic massage, which, by themselves, can make for fulfilling sex without the need for penetration. Sex based on these “preliminaries,” without intercourse itself, is known as “petting.”

GOOD COMMUNICATIONS

For starters, good communication, using both verbal and visual cues, is essential—just as essential as stretching out comfortably in the bed, turning off the lights, and letting go of any worries before getting started. It is important that each partner appreciates and praises the appearance and desirability of the other. It is the time to leave behind all fears of looking foolish and to break through any barriers of false modesty. Leave behind all taboos and prejudices, tell him or her what you like, what you want him or her to do, how he or she can give you more pleasure. Do this with words, looks, and little signals to indicate your wants and needs.

In the case of oral sex, fears and embarrassments often come up, which are easily overcome if we learn to communicate more clearly with our partner. There are men who love to get fellatio, but do not like to give cunnilingus, as well as women who feel ashamed to ask for it when the opportunity presents itself. It also happens that there are men who dive right into “69” without clearing it first with their lover. All of this provokes uneasiness which could be easily avoided with a simple look, gesture, or word.

PROCEED WITH CALM

In general, a man requires between two and three minutes of direct genital stimulation to achieve climax. This is not the case with the ladies, who need twenty to thirty minutes of sexual sport to reach orgasm. In addition, women usually require an extra dose of foreplay: kisses, caresses, sweet nothings, and glances make for a more fulfilling and satisfying act. We can employ any of these at any time during intercourse. Experienced couples know how to dole out these delights; they know when to hold back, they know when to speed up; they give them out affectionately as required to the different parts of their lover’s body. The key is to listen, to sense your partner’s desires and totally satisfy his or her need.

Haste can be the worst enemy of sex. Take your time. Savor the moment and relax. Anticipation is erotic and one of the most exciting factors in a relationship. Above all, avoid routines. There is nothing less exciting than a couple caught in predictability. Surprise your lover with new moves and different positions. Don’t tip off your moves beforehand! Present your lover with new experiences. This is the best-kept secret to being a good lover.

USING ALL FIVE SENSES

Using our senses is the best aphrodisiac, as long as you don’t squander the multiple possibilities they offer and discover the secrets of how to make the most of them.

Smell. This sense plays a most important role in sex, above all when it comes to oral sex. The human brain detects aromas, smells, and essences, which either increase or diminish the attraction between two people. The olfactory sense is powerful and very sensitive. It is the only sense that directly accesses the cerebral cortex; therefore, it is the quickest of the senses and determines, based on odor, whether we find another person attractive or not.

Smell operates differently in every person. What can excite one person can make another cringe. As in so many other things, everyone has their own preferences regarding smells.

But there is one thing on which all sexologists agree, and that is the important role pheromones play in sexual attraction. Every human body gives off odors. Some of them are perceived readily, such as the odor of sweat or the genitals. But there are others which elude the threshold of consciousness. Pheromones are part of this class of imperceptible odors. They are emitted by glands which are found in the armpits and around the sexual organs. Passing across the vomeronasal organ, which is located in the posterior part of the nose, pheromones trigger signals which go directly to the brain, where sexual excitement and attraction are produced.

• Enticing aromas. These are, par excellence, part of the erotic arsenal used in the sensual arts. You can choose among floral fragrances such as citrus blossom, bergamot, jasmine; fruit essences such as tangerine or lemon; exotic spices; sea scents made from fresh herbs; or musk perfume for men. Choose the one you like most, but remember, the natural scent of your body can also be very arousing, so don’t overdo the use of perfumes.
  

  If you prefer, you can also scent the room. For example, scented candles of ylang-ylang essence, sandalwood, and cinnamon produce bewitching effects on the sexual appetite. Try, also, different types of incense or simply put out a bouquet of fresh flowers. Use your imagination; sprinkle petals on the bed sheets and in the bath water.
  

  Hearing. The sounds of pleasure. Learn to heed your partner’s desires. His or her moans, breathing, and sighs are the best stimulants and an infallible guide for knowing what turns him or her on. Silent sex is liable to be very boring. This is not the time to be uptight. Whisper sweet words in his or her ear, cry out in pleasure, boss them around, beg them tenderly. Words can be a source of extremely pleasant arousal for our senses.
  

  Sight. Turn on the lights. Set shame aside and let your partner behold you in your nakedness. Sex in the dark can often be very provocative, but there is nothing more exciting than to be able to see and touch each and every curve, bend, and corner of your lover’s body. Watch how your partner gets excited, how he or she moves, how your partner touches him–or herself. Tell your lover what parts of his or her body you like the most. The room will heat up—count on it. Pay attention to your intimate apparel. There’s nothing more
  

  sensual than a sexy ensemble of good quality. Let your partner kiss, caress, and contemplate your body.
  

  Touch. Please touch. Caress your lover with the tips of your fingers, with your feet, with your thighs, with the inner part of your arms, with your breasts, with your tongue. Later I will explain the technique of how to give a good sensual massage.
  

  Choose to make the bed with sheets of satin or silk. These are special fabrics whose smooth texture provides an added glamour and irresistible degree of sensuousness.
  

  Taste. The taste of pleasure. Suck, lick, run your tongue over every inch of your lover’s body. How does your partner’s body taste? What do his or her lips taste like? Would you be willing to play with edibles such as honey or chocolate?
  

  Remember, too, that many foods have aphrodisiac qualities: tomatoes, celery, figs, cacao, plantains, ginseng, nutmeg, and shellfish, among others.
  

  According to research conducted by the Spanish Association for Sexual Health, a romantic supper is the preferred prelude to lovemaking favored by Europeans, and more than half of them invite their partner to dine with this end in sight. As you probably already know, sharing an enticing dinner can be the start of a great session of foreplay with an opportunity to introduce aphrodisiac recipes. Being mindful of this, remember that excessive alcohol consumption does not mix well with lovemaking!
  

  THE ART OF CARESSING
  

  Erotic massage is one of the most exhilarating forms of foreplay. It relaxes the muscles, dissipates tensions, calms the mind, and prepares us to totally let go in a session of torrid sex. It is an opportunity to share tenderness, affection, and unhindered skin-to-skin contact. Caressing is the most important element of foreplay.
  

  The technique of erotic massage requires good timing and a calm approach. The ideal situation involves a quiet period of time when you won’t be disturbed. Turn off the cell phone, make sure the thermostat is set to a comfortable temperature, around 75˚ Fahrenheit (25˚C), and include, if it suits your fancy, some soothingly appropriate music, red roses, incense.
  

  . . .
  

  Aromatic oils and massage lotions will be your best friends. There is a huge range of choices available in the marketplace; just make sure that whatever you buy is quickly absorbable. Remember that creams take longer to be absorbed and can leave a disagreeable taste if, once the massage is underway, you wish to switch to using lips or tongue to stimulate your partner’s body. So try pure oils such as olive oil, almond oil, and sunflower oil, all of which you can apply directly to the skin or mix with essential oils of sandalwood, ylang-ylang, patchouli, etc. If you want to make your own massage oil, it will suffice to add a couple of drops of essential oil to two tablespoons (30 ml) of any oil you use for a base. For mixing, it is better to choose an oil base that is odorless. Don’t use virgin olive oil for mixing, since its odor is too strong and it doesn’t mix well with the various essential oils. Besides, it will outlast any other aroma you happen to use.
  

  Begin to undress your partner or have him or her do it themselves. The ideal position for them is face down with the head tilted to the side and arms half-bent at the same level as the head. It’s important that your partner feel comfortable throughout the whole process. Cover the buttocks with a soft towel if he or she feels a little chilly at the start (the idea, however, is to get them warmed up in a hurry).
  

  Since it is bound to be quite cold, warm a bit of aromatic oil in your hands before letting it contact your partner’s skin.
  

  Slide your oil-soaked fingertips over the skin of your partner’s back and try out the following motions:
  

  Circular. With the palms of your hands, employ different pressures on the back, making circles using a clockwise motion.
  

  Sliding. Place your hands at the base of your partner’s spine, with the fingers pointing upwards towards the head. Using your body weight, slide both hands along the length of the spinal column.
  

  In our sexual massage, we can begin by caressing and gently rubbing the extremities, the hands, the feet, and the face. Later on, try out a gentle head massage. Pay careful attention to the back of the head, since it is extremely sensitive, and this way you will cause your lover to melt in ecstasy. Pay attention, as well, to the temples and crown of the head. Little by little we get into massaging the back, the neck, the shoulders, the legs. With the next pass we work the thighs, then inside the thighs, and then the breasts. And finally, the genitals.
  

  Remember that you are not confined to using just your hands, but can also use such objects as feathers, a fringe, a silk handkerchief, etc. There are, besides, specific areas very sensitive to gentle rubbing, such as the earlobes, the cheeks, the neck and its nape, the inner part of the arms, the navel, the calves, and between the fingers and toes of the hands and feet.
  

  You can also use your saliva and light blowing to cause differences in temperature on different areas of the skin such as the back or nape of the neck.
  

  It’s important that during erotic massage we avail ourselves of the sensations that are offered through the touching of our partner’s body, exploring its curves, how it tenses here and there, its shapes, experiencing contact with the naked skin, taking note of the slightest details, while expressing complete gentleness and passion.
  

  TANTRIC MASSAGE FOR COUPLES
  

  If you wish to bring an exotic touch to your massage session as a couple, try out this pleasant ancient technique. Inspired by Hindu philosophy, it is a ritual of stroking the erogenous zones so as to achieve equanimity of spirit, as well as an orgasm which involves all the senses. For the one who practices Tantra, physical and sensory pleasures are the key to spiritual development; you can’t have one without the other.
  

  We can begin the session either standing or sitting face to face, totally nude. Here, also, it is important to have available a tranquil environment with soothing music and lit incense. We breathe slowly, giving full attention to our surroundings and all of our sensory impressions.
  

  Touching the Roots. Anoint the feet of your partner with aromatic oil and massage them, pressing into and rubbing the muscles of the entire foot. Switch feet every two or three minutes.
  

  Journey to the Privates. Using both hands, squeeze the thigh and continue upwards, very slowly, as far as the crotch.
  

  Let It Happen. One of you relaxes an arm totally while the other massages it. Repeat with the other arm, then switch roles.
  

  Spreading the Wings. The couple embraces and, each using both hands, kneads the upper region of the other’s back from the shoulder blades to the neck.
  

  Wave of Pleasure. Place both hands beneath the navel and slide them all over the solar plexus up to the shoulders. Then slide the hands all over the upper arm down to the hands.
  

  Kissing the Chakras. Seated with backs pressed one against the other, each rocks the body gently, thereby experiencing the stimulating warmth of the spinal column. You will be surprised how exciting this exercise can be!
  

  Final Relaxation. At the end of the session, both partners stretch out on the ground, facing each other with legs apart. She then places her legs over his legs. Next they grasp hands and allow the energy to flow between them. Breathing slowly, they reflect on all the pleasure they have just shared.
  

  TURNING UP THE HEAT
  

  A good massage, to be truly erotic and sensuous, cannot neglect the most sensitive and arousing zones of the body. Just remember that at this point in the process, we are not going for orgasm. If you see your partner is starting to get too excited, hold off from caressing them until they cool off a bit.
  

  Pleasuring Him. With your partner completely undressed and lying on his back, kneel between his open legs. Rub a small amount of aromatic oil on your hands. Take his testicles in one hand and gently fondle them. With the other hand (well lubricated), stroke the shaft of his penis, starting at the root and going back and forth. Use the gentlest of pressures so as to induce greater excitation. With this massage, pleasure him with the aim of simply arousing him and not causing him to ejaculate.
  

  Pleasuring Her. Ask your partner to lie on her back. Kneel between her open legs and place a small cushion beneath her knees so that she is comfortable. Do not apply any oil to her vulva. Instead, use a liquid sexual lubricant, which has been warmed by rubbing it in your hands before you start. Begin by gently caressing your partner’s thighs, paying special attention to the inner parts of them. Continue, caressing her pubic hair and vulva with a gentle motion. Use your fingertips to lightly palpate the labia majora (big lips) of her vulva, maintaining a regular rhythm. With your other hand you can massage her breasts.
  

  TANTRIC CARESSES
  

  Tantric caresses are the best example of how one should start a sexual encounter. There are five phases of tantric caressing
  

  which, all together, should take at least an hour and a half to perform:
  

  1. Gentle Strokes. Begin by caressing each other with gentle motions, starting with circles and then up-and-down patterns, for fifteen minutes. This is about slowly exploring the nooks and crannies of our partner’s body, leaving the breasts and genitals for later.
     

  2. Silently Together. Make him lie behind you, so as to enjoy the closeness of your bodies, but without getting too worked up. If the temptation is too great, then position yourselves face to face. Dedicate the next fifteen minutes to gazing intensely into your partner’s eyes and gently kissing their body. Maintain skin-to-skin contact. This is an opportunity to realize that an intimate relationship precludes inhibitions, blockages, fears, or shame.
     

  3. Breasts and Genitals. Breathe gently, slowly, and deeply. The time has come to caress your partner’s breasts and genitals with gentle circular movements, first with the hands close together and then moving them farther apart. Don’t suppress any of your vocalizations; they too are an energy conduit and also a source of positive vibrations. Allow this phase to last for up to another half an hour.
     

  Total Energy. Each partner now moves their hands up and down the genitals of the other. Rub along the entire length of his penis and make sure he touches your vulva with sensitivity, sweetly. Remain calm and patient; experience the totality of sensations as if time has stopped. Feel the sexual energy pervading your whole body, not just the genital area.
  

  To further this, it is good to run your hands all over your partner’s back and spine, distributing that energy all around.
  

  AN ADDED PLEASURE
  

  Shared masturbation is one of the most thrilling and pleasurable forms of foreplay. In addition, combined with a hearty bout of oral sex, one can attain a very intense orgasm without the need for penetration.
  

  The perfect antecedent to oral sex is masturbation. Gentle rubbing, the heavy breathing which comes close but doesn’t touch, the first kisses, the tongue toying with our sex; these are most exciting preliminaries.
  

  Remember that you should pace your seduction. Part of the success of your session relies on delayed gratification. If you notice yourself about to place your mouth on your partner’s sexual part, stop, change your tack, and direct your attention to other erogenous areas on their body. Kiss the interior part of the thigh, caress their buttocks, have your tongue fondle the cup of their navel. Use your hands to rub between their gluteals, approaching the anus without touching it.
  

  Pleasuring Him. In general, women prefer foreplay more than men. Men usually go straight for the “gusto.” This happens mostly due to lack of knowledge or familiarity, but the truth is that once men discover what it’s all about, they enjoy it just as much or even more than the ladies! The combination of amorous advances, rubbing, and caresses prior to engaging in fellatio can result in something very exciting that enhances the sexual encounter.
  

  To reiterate: delayed gratification brings success. She can begin by kneeling at her lover’s feet and rubbing her cheek against the bulging “parcel” in his pants, maintaining constant eye contact with him. Surely, he might want to go on the offensive, but this is precisely the moment she must take charge and decide the course of events. Massage his butt, his thighs, and the “bulge” waiting to be loosened from his pants. Carefully unbutton his trousers, lower his fly (you can even do this with your teeth), and let him keep his underpants on. Rub your hands over his briefs, massage his butt cheeks, nibble his thighs, play with his navel, but at no time make the slightest contact with his impatient “tool.” Selfishly direct your attention to his legs, his inner thighs, the back of his knees, as well as his buns and navel.