Opposite Sides (43 page)

For the first time in
their relationship, Hans found this visit strained, not because
they were less friendly towards each other but because of the
suspicious nature of the political world that surrounded them.
There were now areas of discussion that were never to be entered so
much of what they had to say to each other revolved around the
children or fell back on the good things things they did together
when Caroline was alive.

By mid-afternoon, Hans
had returned to his room at the Inn. He knew in his heart that this
would be for the last time. He bought some flowers to put on
Caroline’s grave the following morning. The wind was cold and
chilled his shoulders. He sat in silence, a cold wind chilling his
shoulders and making the bones in his face ache. All the while it
threatened to rip his hat from his head and toss it high into the
air. He squatted and stared at the meagre bunch of flowers he was
holding between his freezing fingers. They looked almost pathetic
in number yet they had taken all his loose change and more to buy.
He stuffed them into the small ceramic grave vase beside Caroline’s
headstone and wished he could have brought more. It was a sombre
moment knowing that the waiting to be re-united with her would take
so long. He felt a burning longing to visit some of his old haunts
and re-live the memories of those happy earlier days yet he knew
that could never be.

Hans quietly said his
farewells and left. There did not seem much point in staying longer
among the cold and silent graves. He walked quickly through the
gateway, crossing the road and picking up the once familiar pathway
up the hill, first along side the outer wall of the college
grounds, then through the trees and up to the top where he had
first sat as a young, unsure foreign student. So much had happened
since that day: new language, new experiences, new friendships and
then Caroline and Andrea, and, finally a new friendship he had
found with Jan, for without her intervention and care, his
beautiful daughter would have been lost to him for ever. The
thought sent pangs of pain throughout his body.

Hans sat on the side of
the hill, hands deep into his coat pockets, looking out over the
rolling countryside until it levelled out and met a dark grey sea.
The keen wind whistled around his ears so he used one of his hands
to push his hat further on to his head. He was far away in thought
remembering the happy days, his love for Caroline and how he had
grown just as fond of this place as he had of Salzburg, when a
voice close behind him spoke.

“
What are you
doing up here on your own?”

For a moment he thought
it was Miss Turner. It sounded like her. But the voice was far
younger. He jumped to his feet and spun round like a gyro, almost
falling backwards on the uneven ground.

“
Jan!”

“
Hello Hans.”
She was only a step away from him, wrapped up to keep
warm.

“
I used to
come up here in my student days,” he added. He asked her what made
her come up the hill but she avoided giving him a direct answer.
Instead, she said,

“
Aunt said
that you’d returned for a few days. Anne phoned to say you’d
visited and asked if I had seen you. She told me that Gerald was so
pleased to see you again.”

“
Yes. They
appear to be very happy together.” He kicked at a clump grass
swaying vigorously in the wind. It was longer than the rest so
maybe the sheep did not like its taste. “It may be a long time
before I can get back here.” He watched for her reaction but she
indicated nothing.

“
What did you
think of their new house?”

“
Nice. The
children are very lucky to have all that countryside around
them.”

“
Cambridgeshire is a lovely county. Have you seen Andrea
today?”

“
Yes, but not
for long. I couldn’t have asked for a better child. Happy, polite
and so talktative. You have done well.”

“
Sorry I
missed you the other day. I only arrived from London last evening.
Aunt said Andrea was quite excited about your visit. That was a
lovely doll’s pram you bought her. She has been pushing it around
all day and her dolly loves it, too”

“
I am glad
she likes it.”

Jan turned away from him
and looked out over the landscape and towards the English
Channel.

“
It’s an
awful long way to France. You can’t even see the other
coast.”

“
It’s there.
Just over the horizon. Not that far at all.”

Jan gave a light cough,
not the kind where you think a cold might be coming but one from
deep in the throat when it emotionally sticks and is reluctant to
come out.

“
Do you think
there
will
be
another war?” she asked still looking out to sea.

“
Not if
England doesn’t want one,” he answered flat toned.

Jan turned around,
removing her thick gloves. She removed her glasses and cleaned them
on a dainty, frilly, embroidered handkerchief.

“
England
doesn’t!” He watched Jan set her glasses back over her ears and
then shove them back until they sat firmly across the top of her
nose. “I’m not so sure about Germany. It would be awful if there is
another war.” She grasped the brim of her hat as another gust tried
to snatch it away.

Hans did not comment.
They both waited a while, each one not wanting to make the first
move until Hans finally spoke.

“
I’m going
back down. Do you want to come too?”

He perceived a slight
turn up at the corners of her mouth. She adjusted her glasses very
thoughtfully.

“
Why not!
After all, we’re friends now, aren’t we?”

“
Agreed!
Friends we are!”

She laughed and slapped
her hands against her thighs before replacing her
gloves.

“
Well, come
on, friend. What are we waiting for?”

Together, they walked
back into town and Jan promised Hans that she would try to keep in
touch, come what may. Hans had a few more days left when he could
see Andrea and when the clouds lifted one afternoon, he and Jan
took the child to a nearby park.

The next morning when he
called, Jan was ready to catch the train back to work. Hans
accompanied her to the station, of his own free will this time, and
as they walked together, they talked of Andrea and of Jan’s nursing
studies and of her work at the hospital. Hans lifted Jan’s bag into
the train and stood on the platform, watching until the departing
train was only a thin line in the distance. He wondered how long it
would be before he would be able to visit the Turner house again.
That evening, he received a phone call ordering him to return to
Germany. Immediately.

1938, a hot summer day.
Hans had been to the Tirpitzufer to hand in a report. He wandered
along the canal bank and turned into Unter den Linden to make his
way to the station. He paused to soak up the moment: the deafening
screams and idolised chanting that electrified the air surrounding
the gigantic hanging red swastika flags that swayed effortlessly in
the slight breeze. The last words of Hitler’s speech had cut into
the air like a sabre, so that even the chatter of the birds fell
silent.

Czechoslovakia shall be wiped off the map
!

Resounding shouts rose to
a loud roar as the thousand voices chanted in unison:

“
Heil
Hitler!”

“
Sieg
Heil!”

“
Heil Hitler!
Sieg Heil!”

The crowd was mesmerised.
Their leader stood on the balcony high above the swaying sea of
adoring faces. Hitler wiped his hair back and nodded with
satisfaction so slightly that only the cameras had noted the
movement. What his fans saw next, was the movement of his right
arm, swinging rhythmically up and down like a vertical pendulum
from his elbow.

The plans were
implemented. On October 1st 1938, as agreed with the English Prime
Minister, Herr Hitler marched his soldiers into the Czechoslovakian
part, known as the Sudetenland. There were many celebrations that
had taken place that day as the Sudetenlanders became one with the
people of the Reich.

Hans knew he would never
forget making his way home later that evening, for the large crowd
of dancing people in the city centre had slowed all trafic progress
through there down to a crawl.

“
Did you see
any of it, Hans? Wonderful news!”

Renard was visiting
again. He broke the news as Hans barely had time to unlatched the
door and step into his uncle’s house. This time, Hans had noted
that Renard was in uniform. A wide black swastika armband over the
top of his jacket. It was plain to see that he had become one of
them; one of Herr Hitler’s admirers. How like Renard. He did
nothing done by halves.

“
I hope the
Führer knows what he’s doing.” Hans felt his jaw muscles become
taut. He removed his hat but kept hold of it as his brother came
towards him down the hallway. “Nobody wants war; this side or the
other side of the Channel.”

“
Oh, I
totally agree, brother!” Renard had reached the cupboard and held
the door open for Hans so that he could hang it up. Renard
grinned.

“
Mr
Chamberlain has shown that England has no wish to stand in
Germany’s way but will it necessarily lead to a better
Europe?”

“
Certainly!”
Renard was grinning so wide that Hans thought his ears might drop
off. “I’ve told you all along that the Führer knows what’s best for
everyone.” The two brothers made their way to the kitchen. “A
thousand year Reich. A German Reich for all Germans. It all makes
sense. Isn’t he a marvellous leader? You must admire him! England’s
Mr Chamberlain knows a good idea when he’s presented with one, eh?”
Renard gave a sly chuckle that did not go amiss.

Hans had not
answered.

If Renard
wants to believe
that, Hans
thought,
then he has been taken in more
than I suspected.
Even
though he now knew that Mr Chamberlain’s words had come true:
‘
Peace in our time
,’ and that he felt as if he had played some small part in
saving the world from another conflict, there was something deep
inside that had made him uneasy.

When Hans had returned to
Germany this time the idea of that peace was already beginning to
fall apart, whatever Mr Chamberlain may have said, appeared to be
coming true. The following year Herr Hitler sent his troops into
Bohemia and Maravia. The soldiers positioned their tanks in and
around the attractive bohemian city of Prague. No Czech voice had
the freedom of expression again.

Hans received a small
photograph of Andrea and another long letter from Jan. The
photograph had been taken on Andrea’s birthday. He could hardly
believe she was six. A lump stuck in Hans’ throat when he unwrapped
the picture from the letter paper he had taken from the envelope
with the British stamps.

How I hate
the sight of bedpans
now, Jan had
written.
I’ve been emptying them for the
entire week. I am looking forward to next week because I will be
working alongside doctors on the emergency ward. I think that will
be my forte in life.

Hope things
are well with you. Let’s hope things will settle down and we can
meet again.

Love from
Jan

Hans replaced
the letter and photograph in the envelope and tucked it securely
into his top pocket.
Andrea was synonymous
with Jan. How long would it be before he saw
either of them again?

Late in
August, 1939, the second large expansion was poised to take place.
When Hans made his usual visit to Tirpitzufer, he was informed
that
Case White
had been placed before the generals and areas of thrust were
in the process of being transcribed on paper. The attack on Poland
was set to begin. If Germany was to have a dominant position in
Europe, the Fatherland would need to expand.
Lebensraum
was needed to grow food
for an expanding population, as well as feed all the young boys and
soldiers who would become Germany’s new heroes. Like most of the
eligible men, Erwin Hans Resmel was called upon to do his
duty.

On the first day of
September, Leutnant Resmel was waiting close to the Polish border
for the field telephone to ring. It was a still, cool morning and
the sun had barely had time to make its appearance. A light mist
huddled close to the ground, a curtain concealing something that
wanted to remain secretive and unseen. They waited. The minutes
ticked on. The rays of the sun started to penetrate and shred the
veil until it began to reveal the men and their machines like
actors poised for action on a stage. The final moment had arrived.
It was almost five o’clock.

General’s
headquarters calling all units
.

The valves in the field
wireless hissed and crackled. The message was faint but
unmistakable to those who had been prepared to receive it: Prepare
to move forward to engage the enemy! Divisions one and three - move
to your positions and hold. Divisions two and four - begin your
advance at precisely five six and twenty hours. Divisions six and .
. . ”