Only for You (19 page)

Son of a bitch.

Disgusted with my lack of
loyal thoughts for Violet, I miss getting rid of two jellies before
I’m out of moves, and toss the iPad on the seat beside
me.

My driver has the radio on,
but its talk radio—NPR, I think. Either way, I’m not interested, no
matter what the polls say about my generation. From what I can
tell, both sides talk out of their asses, and both want to own you
in some way.

Rolling my eyes, I get up
and head to the back, nodding at my drummer. He has his ear buds
in, sticks drumming along the beat. He tips up his chin in
answer.

So much for conversation. I
was hoping to learn the guy’s name before we rehearse
tonight.

I crash into my bunk and
pull the privacy screen, putting my hands behind my head and
closing my eyes.

Last night hadn’t been the
best, even if I had gotten laid. I wasn’t that into it and
she
kept intruding into
the whole process. Which should be a big indicator that it sucked,
because….
process
, really?

Honestly, this is all
Violet’s fault. She’s the one who made Bliss forbidden fruit. She’s
the one that made my dumbass libido start chanting Bliss’ name.
Before now, Bliss was just another part of our crew, just another
chick that I couldn’t bang because I like drama-free tours and the
rules Everett had set in place.

“
Screw the fans, not the
help,” my dad had drilled into my head.

What he should have
added:
You can also screw the up and
coming stars—they like that kind of attention.
Because that’s exactly what he did, with almost every female
he produced.

Except Violet. For whatever
reason, I’d mistaken his normally lecherous ways for just that,
instead of fatherly concern. My skin still crawls at the thought of
my dad pimping her out.

Listen to me, shit for
brains. Violet was my present to you

“
We’re stopping for grub,”
the driver yells, and my eyes pop open.

My stomach growls. Despite
the snacks I wolfed down an hour ago, I’m still hungry.

Leaving the privacy of my
bunk, I join my band mates and wait for the light to
turn.

“
Dude, I could eat
everything in this place.”

“
That’s because you’re
fucked up.”

“
Screw you.” The bassist
punches the drummer in the shoulder, and the drummer hits him back.
I flash a grin, not sure if I should contribute to the
conversation. Yet another reason why I resent Everett.

Just as I get to know the
band, my dad decides it’s time for a new drummer or bassist. One by
one, he trades out the old for the new, which leaves me out in the
cold once more. The guys practice together a lot and most of the
time it doesn’t include me, since I’m still singing the same songs
with the same beat to the same moves.

It’s getting old, and
downright embarrassing. Should a twenty-four-year-old be singing
the same songs that he sung at sixteen?

My answer:
No
.

Everett’s answer:
Can’t disappoint your fans
.

The driver parks the bus in
the parking lot of one of those chain restaurants that are always
located right by a hotel.

On the way out, I grab my
glasses, sliding them into place, and make sure my phone is in my
pocket, along with my wallet.

I have no idea if Everett
will join us and pay for this business expense, and I don’t want to
be caught empty-handed or looking like an asshole.

Supposedly, my trust fund
and my earnings have been kept locked up tight in the stock
exchange and banks in various forms. Supposedly, Everett was to
give me full control of it all two month ago, when I turned
twenty-four. But he hasn’t. And I haven’t had the time to go to a
bank and check everything out.

However, as soon as this,
“Look who’s back together tour” is over, I’m taking control of
everything.

And I have the flash drive
to help me.

Bliss slides into focus,
her curly brown hair bouncing in a high ponytail. She’s walking
with Violet, but I barely notice my ex-girlfriend, too intent on
the way Bliss’ thighs show each time the wind blows her skirt to
the side.

“
Damn, I want to hit
that.”

“
Get in line, bro. Those
big tits are mine.”

Seeing red, I stop suddenly
and turn, facing my new band mates. “What did you say?”

The drummer holds up his
hands. “Dude, we weren’t talking about your girl.”

“
Yeah, it’s
Bl—”

“
Not another word. Bliss
Davenport is off-limits,” I growl.

The bassist smiles
knowingly. “We get it… you like a little strange on the side. Don’t
worry, we keep it all hush-hush.”

I shove him before I even
know what I’m doing. “Seriously, bro, shut up. Don’t think about
Bliss, don’t talk about Bliss… don’t jerk off to images of
Bliss’
big tits
when you’re all alone at night. Stay away from her. Hell,
don’t even talk to her.”

“
She’s not worth the
trouble you’ll get in,” I add, so that I don’t seem all Edward
Cullen possessive. I’m just Jaxon, asshole protector of innocent
girls like Bliss.

I hear a gasp, and I turn
around, already knowing who’s going to be standing there. The sun
shines on the lenses of her glasses. New ones with new frames.
She’s looks cute as hell with them on and still has no clue that I
had them made for her.

Not that she would believe
it, especially after that speech. Jaw clenching, I try to think of
a way out of this. But I know I can’t so I stop thinking at all.
Instead, I smirk. “Something you need?”

Her pretty face turns red,
full lips parting as if she’s about to tell me off. She should tell
me off, in front of God and everybody, but she won’t. In the couple
of months I’ve known her, she never has.

“
No,” she says softly,
that one little word doing more damage than any cursing out would
have ever wrought. She spins around, wrapping her arms around her
middle, and heading in the opposite direction of everyone,
especially me.

Violet marches up to me,
her lips all smashed together. “What did you say to
her?”

“
Nothing. Just like you
said, Vi. I’m staying the hell away.” Then I brush past her,
heading into the restaurant.

It’s the quickest and
quietest meal of the tour, yet.

*** *** ***

Violet

After the disastrous lunch
in which no one said anything, I managed to get Bliss to ride with
me, instead of the conversion van that followed us in our two buses
and one tractor-trailer convoy.

Pressing a glass of sweet
tea into her hand, we sit down at the table near the kitchen area.
She sets the glass down and then takes off her glasses, rubbing the
indentions along her nose.

“
You have very pretty
eyes,” I say, thinking that it’s always best to start out with a
real compliment. “Glasses on or off, they’re very pretty. I bet you
had all the guys back home chasing you.”

“
Thank you,” she says,
then slips her glasses back on and takes a sip of tea. Her nails
are cut short, bright pink tips with a layer of green at the
bottom.

So much for compliments
breaking the ice. I mean, we have talked a few times, nothing
personal or beyond asking about her day or if she needed anything.
Maybe she thinks I don’t mean those things, that if she does ask,
I’ll say no or laugh at her.

It’s what Callie did before
the judge sentenced her to months of community service and house
arrest. I brush the thoughts of my ex-best friend aside and
concentrate on the girl sitting across from me—friendless and, from
what I can tell, family-less, too. She doesn’t have a cell phone
and she’s never made a call to anyone at any of our
stops.

I’m not ashamed to say that
I’ve had one of my bodyguards follow Bliss around for her own
safety. She’s about the same age as me, but unlike me, she’s not
aware of her surroundings or the crazies that follow
celebrities.

“
So how’s the internship?
Everything college has been preparing you for?” Everett had
introduced Bliss as the girl who would be assisting the head of
wardrobe for college credits. A part of me envies that opportunity,
and as soon as this tour is done, I’m applying for
school.

Though I guess I’ll be
living on my own, instead of with Cole, like we’d planned. Unless,
by some miracle, he changes his mind.

Bliss blinks at me, and
then straightens. “Yes, thank you for the opportunity.”

“
Thank you for dressing me
so stylishly.”

Her cheeks turn red.
“You’re welcome.” She takes another sip of her tea and set it down
again. “Did you want to talk about what you’re wearing tomorrow
night?”

“
Uh, no. I’m sure whatever
you’ve picked out will be great.” I clear my throat. This is really
going well.
Not
.
In my mind, I imagine Cole laughing at me, his blue eyes all
teasing. My heart pinches in response. “So… about Jackson or the
artist known as Jaxon Hunter.” I give the x in his name an extra
hard pronunciation. “Has he been making you
uncomfortable?”

She looks down at the
table, her hands squeezing her glass tonight. “I swear I haven’t
been flirting with him.”

“
It wouldn’t matter to me
if
you
were,” I
say, and her head jerks up. The new glasses Jaxon had made for her
look really cute. They are a dark green instead of black and I had
to tell her that it was a tour perk, instead of the truth, when I
returned them to her.

“
But it would to me. I’m
not here to sleep with him.” She nods once. “I’m here to earn a
living.”

Earn a living? Is that how
a college student would view an internship? Sure, this one is paid
and she has all her expenses taken care of, but still… “I didn’t
think you were, but I wanted to check on you and make sure he
hasn’t done or said anything inappropriate.”

Gosh, I sound exactly like
my mother at this moment, but I don’t care, Bliss is like a baby
bird with broken wings. I should know, I was once broken, and then
Cole came into my life.

But now he’s gone. Tears
prick at the back of my eyes.

“
Jaxon is always saying
something inappropriate. But doing something—he saves that for
groupies, not me,” Bliss says with a frown.

I laugh at her frown
instead of crying over Cole. “Do you want him to be inappropriate
with you?”

Bliss’ face goes cherry
tomato red. “Sometimes.”

My laughter fades away, and
I sigh. “He’s not a nice guy right now, Bliss.” Then again,
thinking of his confession not too long after our tour started,
he’s not as bad as I’d thought either.

“
Nice or not, haven’t you
ever met a guy that made you want things you didn’t think you could
have or deserve?” she asks.

The first time Cole and I
made love comes to mind, bittersweet memories washing over me. I
wish I could drown in them, make them fill up the emptiness that
lives inside of me now.

I smile sadly. “Just
one.”

Chapter
Twenty-Five

Jaxon

Tonight’s show in Raleigh
went off without a hitch, partly due to Rae’s visible excitement
and my ability to pretend it’s me she’s excited about.

But it’s not me.

It’s like the closer we get
to the Charlotte show, the more amped up she gets, which might
explain why she’s actually in my bus, practically dancing around
the place with two of the female backup singers.

“
Damn, girl, have a seat,”
I laugh when she bumps into me. I’m sitting at the booth near the
kitchen, playing cards with Tripp, the drummer.

She shakes her head.
“Can’t. Another day down and another day closer.”

Tripp puts his cards on the
table, facedown. “I need to take a piss.” He leaves and Violet
takes his place, peeking at his cards and flashing a
grin.

“
You’re gonna lose,” she
says, all sing-songy. Her eyes are bright, and for once, she’s not
looking at me like I’m the devil bent on ruining anything innocent.
But I know it’s because she’s buzzed from the itty-bitty glass of
champagne she drank, and not from a sudden change of mind. “Like
you always do.”

Still, where there’s a
smile, there’s a way in.

“
Lightweight,” I tease,
hoping like hell she’ll stay in this good mood of hers.

I glance at the female
backup singers. They’re sitting on the couch, with Trip sandwiched
between them. Judging by the look on his face, I’d have to dynamite
his ass to make him move.

“
Can we have that talk
now, Vi?”

She shrugs. “If you
want.”