Authors: Stephen R. Donaldson
She knew now that he would live. Though he had shown no hint of consciousness, the
diamondraught
was vivid in him—antivenin, febrifuge, and roborant in one. Within the first day, the swelling had receded from his right side and arm, leaving behind a deep mottled black-and-yellow bruise but no sign of any permanent damage. Yet he did not awaken. And she did not try to reach into him, either to gain information or to nudge him toward consciousness. She feared that perhaps the sickness still gnawed at his mind, exacting its toll from his bare sanity; but she was loath to ascertain the truth. If his mind were healing as well as his body, then she had no reason or excuse to violate his privacy. And if he were being corroded toward madness, she would need more strength than she now possessed to survive the ordeal.
The venom was still in him. Because of her, he had been driven right to the edge of self-extirpation. And even then she had risked him further for another’s sake. But she had also called him back from that edge. Somehow through his delirium and looming death he had recognized her—and trusted her. That was enough. Whenever the continuing vulnerability of his sopor became more than she could bear, she went to tend the injured Giant.
His name was Mistweave, and his hardiness was vaguely astounding to her. Her own restless exhaustion, the inner clench of her tension, the burning of her red-rimmed eyes on the salt air, made him seem healthier than she was. By the second day of the squalls, his condition had stabilized to such an extent that she was able to attempt the setting of his fractured ribs. Guiding Galewrath and Seadreamer as they applied traction to Mistweave’s torso, she bent those bones away from his lungs back into their proper alignment so that they could heal without crippling him. He bore the pain with a fierce grin and a flask of
diamondraught
; and when at last he lapsed into unconsciousness Linden could hear the new ease of his breathing.
The Storesmaster complimented the success of the manipulation with a blunt nod, as if she had expected nothing else from the Chosen. But Cable Seadreamer lifted her from her feet and gave her a tight hug that felt like envy. The flexing of his oaken muscles told her how severely the Master’s brother ached for healing—for the Earth, and for his own misery. The scar under his eyes gleamed, pale and aggrieved.
In recognition and empathy, she returned his clasp. Then she left Saltroamrest, where Mistweave lay, and went back to Covenant.
Late at night after the third day of squalls, he began to rouse himself.
He was too weak to raise his head or speak. He seemed too weak to comprehend where he was, who she was, what had happened to him. But behind the dullness of his gaze he was free of fever. The venom had returned to latency.
Propping up his head, she fed him as much as he could eat of the food and drink which Cail had brought for her earlier. Immediately afterward, he slipped away into a more natural sleep.
For the first time in long days, Linden went to her own chamber. She had stayed away from it as if it were still full of nightmares; but now she knew that that darkness had receded, at least temporarily. Stretching out her exhaustion in the hammock, she let herself rest.
Throughout the next day, Covenant awakened at intervals without fully regaining consciousness. Each time he opened his eyes, tried to lift his head, she fed him; and each time he drifted almost at once back into his dreams. But she did not need her health-sense to see that he was growing stronger as his flesh drank in sleep and aliment. And that gave her a strange easement. She felt that she was linked to him symbiotically, that the doors of perception and vulnerability which she had opened to him could not be closed again. His recuperation comforted her in more ways than she could name.
This baffled her lifelong desire for independence, frustrated her severe determination to live at no behest but her own. If she had ever permitted herself to be thus accessible to someone else’s needs and passions, how could she have survived the legacy of her parents? Yet she could not wish herself free of this paradoxically conflicted and certain man. The knots within her softened to see him healing.
Early the next morning, she fed him again. When he went back to sleep, she ascended to the afterdeck and found that the squalls had blown away. A steady wind carried Starfare’s Gem lightly through the seas. Overhead the sails curved like wings against the untrammeled azure of the sky.
Honninscrave hailed her like a shout of praise from the wheeldeck, then asked about Covenant. She replied briefly, almost dourly, not because the question troubled her, but because she did not know how to handle the unwonted susceptibility of her answer. Something within her wanted to laugh in pleasure at the breeze, and the clean sunshine, and the dancing of the waves. The
dromond
sang under her. And yet, unexpectedly, she felt that she was on the verge of tears. Her innominate contradictions confused her. She was no longer certain of who she was.
Scanning the afterdeck, she saw Pitchwife near the place where Covenant had lain in his cocoon. Vain still stood in the vicinity—he had not moved at all since Covenant’s rescue—and Pitchwife ignored him. The deformed Giant bore a rude slab of rock over one shoulder. In the opposite hand, he carried a stone cauldron. Impelled partly by curiosity, partly by a rising pressure of words, Linden went to see what he was doing. He seemed to have a special empathy for confusion.
“Ah, Chosen,” he said in greeting as she approached; but his gaze was distracted, and concentration furrowed his brows. “You behold me about my craft.” In spite of his preoccupation, he gave her a smile. “Doubtless you have observed the workings of Starfare’s Gem and seen that each Giant serves the needs of the ship. And doubtless also you have noted that the exception is myself. Pitchwife rides no rigging,
bears no duty at Shipsheartthew. He labors not in the galley, neither does he tend either sail or line. What purpose then does he serve among this brave company?”
His tone hinted at humor; but most of his attention was elsewhere. Setting down his rock and cauldron, he examined first the wild magic scars in the deck, then the damage done to the roof of the housing. To reach the roof, he ascended a ladder which he must have positioned earlier for that purpose.
“Well,” he went on as he studied the harmed granite, “it is plain for all to see that I am inaptly formed for such labor. My frame ill fits the exertion of Shipsheartthew. I move without celerity, whether on deck or aloft. In the galley”—he laughed outright—“my stature poorly suits the height of stoves and tables. A Giant such as I am was not foreseen by the makers of Starfare’s Gem. And as to the tending of sail and line—” With a nod of satisfaction at the condition of the roof, or at his thoughts, he returned to the cauldron. “That is not my craft.”
Reaching into the stone pot, he stirred the contents with one hand, then brought out a rank brown mass which looked like partially-hardened tar. “Chosen,” he said as he worked the mass with both hands, “I am condignly named Pitchwife. This is my ‘pitch,’ which few Giants and no others may grasp with impunity, for without Giant-flesh and Giant-craft any hand may be turned to stone. And the task for which I mold such pitch is ‘wiving.’
“Witness!” he exclaimed as if his work made him gay. Climbing the ladder, he began to form his pitch like clay into the broken wall at the edge of the roof. Deftly he shaped the pitch until it filled the breach, matching the lines of the wall exactly. Then he descended, returned to his slab of rock. His mighty fingers snapped a chip the size of his palm off the slab. His eyes gleamed. Chortling cheerfully, he went back to the roof.
With a flourish, as if to entertain a large audience, he embedded his chip in the pitch. At once, he snatched back his hand.
To Linden’s amazement, the chip seemed to crystallize the pitch. Almost instantly, the mass was transformed to stone. In the space between two heartbeats, the pitch fused itself into the breach. The wall was restored to wholeness as if it had never been harmed. She could find no mark or flaw to distinguish the new stone from the old.
The expression on her face drew a spout of glee from Pitchwife. “Witness, and be instructed,” he laughed happily. “This bent and misbegotten form is an ill guide to the spirit within.” With precarious bravado, he thrust out his arms. “I am Pitchwife the Valorous!” he shouted. “Gaze upon me and suffer awe!”
His mirth was answered by the Giants nearby. They shared his delight, relished his comic posturing. But then the First’s voice carried through the jests and ripostes. “Surely you are valorous,” she said; and for an instant Linden misread her tone. She appeared to be reprimanding Pitchwife’s levity. But a quick glance corrected this impression. The First’s eyes sparkled with an admixture of fond pleasure and dark memory. “And if you descend not from that perch,” she went on, “you will become Pitchwife the Fallen.”
Another shout of laughter rose from the crew. Feigning imbalance, Pitchwife tottered down the ladder; but his mien shone as if he could hardly refrain from dancing.
Shortly the Giants returned to their tasks; the First moved away; and Pitchwife contented himself with continuing his work more soberly. He repaired the roof in small sections so that his pitch would not sag before he could set it; and when he finished, the roof was as whole as
the wall. Then he turned his attention to the fire-scars along the deck. These he mended by filling them with pitch, smoothing them to match the deck, then setting each with a chip of stone. Though he worked swiftly, he seemed as precise as a surgeon.
Sitting against the wall of the housing, Linden watched him. At first, his accomplishments fascinated her; but gradually her mood turned. The Giant was like Covenant—gifted with power; strangely capable of healing. And Covenant was the question to which she had found no answer.
In an almost perverse way, that question appeared to be the same one which so bedeviled her in another form. Why was she here? Why had Gibbon said to her,
You are being forged as iron is forged to achieve the ruin of the Earth
, and then afflicted her with such torment to convince her that he spoke the truth?
She felt that she had spent her life with that question and still could not reply to it.
“Ah, Chosen.” Pitchwife had finished his work. He stood facing her with arms akimbo and echoes of her uncertainty in his eyes. “Since first I beheld you in the dire mirk of the Sarangrave, I have witnessed no lightening of your spirit. From dark to dark it runs, and no dawn comes. Are you not content with the redemption of Covenant Giantfriend and Mistweave—a saving which none other could have performed?” He shook his head, frowning to himself. Then, abruptly, he moved forward, seated himself against the wall near her. “My people have an apothegm—as who does not in this wise and contemplative world?” He regarded her seriously, though the corners of his mouth quirked. “It is said among us, ‘A sealed door admits no light.’ Will you not speak to me? No hand may open that door but your own.”
She sighed. His offer touched her; but she was so full of things she did not know how to say that she could hardly choose among them. After a moment, she said, “Tell me there’s a reason.”
“A reason?” he asked quietly.
“Sometimes—” She groped for a way to articulate her need. “He’s why I’m here. Either I got dragged along behind him by accident. Or I’m supposed to do something to him. For him,” she added, remembering the old man on Haven Farm. “I don’t know. It doesn’t make sense to me. But sometimes when I’m sitting down there watching him, the chance he might die terrifies me. He’s got so many things I need. Without him, I don’t have any
reasons
here. I never knew I would feel”—she passed a hand over her face, then dropped it, deliberately letting Pitchwife see as much of her as he could—“feel so maimed without him.
“But it’s more than that.” Her throat closed at what she was thinking. I just don’t want him to die! “I don’t know how to help him. Not really. He’s right about Lord Foul—and the danger to the Land. Somebody has got to do what he’s doing. So the whole world won’t turn into a playground for Ravers. I understand that. But what can I do about it? I don’t know this world the way he does. I’ve never even
seen
the things that made him fall in love with the Land in the first place. I’ve never seen the Land
healthy
.
“I have tried,” she articulated against the old ache of futility, “to help. God preserve me, I’ve even tried to accept the things I can see when nobody else sees them and for all I know I’m just going crazy. But I don’t know how to share his commitment. I don’t have the power to
do
anything.” Power, yes. All her life, she had wanted power. But her desire for it had been born in darkness—and wedded there more intimately than any marriage of heart and will. “Except try to keep him alive and hope he doesn’t get tired of dragging me around after him. I
don’t think I’ve ever done anything with my life except
deny
. I didn’t become a doctor because I wanted people to live. I did it because I hate death.”
She might have gone on, then. There in the sunlight, with the stone warm under her, the breeze in her hair, Pitchwife’s gentleness at her side, she might have risked her secrets. But when she paused, the Giant spoke into the silence.
“Chosen, I hear you. There is doubt in you, and fear, and also concern. But these things pass as well by another name, which you do not speak.”
He shifted his posture, straightened himself as much as the contortion of his back allowed. “I am a Giant. I desire to tell you a story.”
She did not answer. She was thinking that no one had ever spoken to her with the kind of empathy she heard from Pitchwife.
After a moment, he commenced by saying, “Perchance it has come to your ears that I am husband to the First of the Search, whom I name Gossamer Glowlimn.” Mutely she nodded. “That is a tale worthy of telling.
“Chosen,” he began, “you must first understand that the Giants are a scant-seeded people. It is rare among us for any family to have as many as three children. Therefore our children are precious to us—aye, a very treasure to all the Giants, even such a one as myself, born sickly and malformed like an augury of Earth-Sight to come. But we are also a long-lived people. Our children are children yet when they have attained such age as yours. Therefore our families may hope for lives together in spans more easily measured by decades than years. Thus the bond between parent and child, generation after generation, is both close and enduring—as vital among us as any marriage.