Once Around (20 page)

He wore a dinner jacket instead of his usual denim work shirt. His shiny black hair was neatly combed. But it didn
't fool her. She'd have been surprised if it fooled anyone. He radiated danger. Pure shimmering sexual danger. He was every mother's nightmare, the erotic dream come to life.

Her dream.

"Don't be silly," she said, all light and breezy and insincere. "I've been looking forward to this for weeks."

"
She has," said Spencer. "That's all she's talked about"

Rafe turned away from them and said something to Jessy that turned the woman
's cheeks, bright red. She hadn't considered Jessy in that light before. Both Rafe and Jessy were unattached. They could walk out that door and head straight for a motel on Route 1, and it wouldn't be anybody's business but their own.

She linked her arm through Spencer
's. "They're playing my song," she said, even though she hadn't the foggiest notion what song it was. "Care to dance?"

#

"He never shuts up," Rafe said to Jessy as they watched Molly and Spencer out on the dance floor. "Look at him. That mouth is always moving."

"
He's a wonderful conversationalist," Jessy said, without taking her eyes off the lawyer. "You should be half as good."

"
He's a talker," Rafe said, glowering as the lawyer danced Molly in the general vicinity of the patio. "I don't trust talkers."

"
Wearing your heart on your sleeve tonight, are you?" Jessy's Mississippi drawl softened the sting of her words.

"
Look who's talking. I know what you're thinking, but you're not in his league, kid. Not even in your pretty new clothes."

Jessy turned to him
, her brown eyes wide with hurt. "You're not number one on her dance card either, in case you haven't noticed."

"
You're right," he said, leaning back in his seat until he was balanced on the two rear legs of the chair. "We've got that much in common."

Molly
's laughter drifted toward them over the music and conversation.

"
I hate that sound," Jessy said.

"
I'm not crazy about it myself."

"
Back home, a gentleman would have asked me to dance by now."

"
Yeah," said Rafe. "The lawyer's got a lot to learn."

"
I'm not talking about Spencer," she said. "I'm talking about you."

"
You don't want to dance with me."

"
That's right," she said, "and you don't want to dance with me." She inclined her head in the general direction of Molly. and Spencer. "But we both want to dance with them."

Why hadn
't he thought of that? He stood up and held out his hand to Jessy. "Come on, Doc. Let's give them a run for their money."

He and Jessy must have looked like father and daughter out there on the floor. They were comically mismatched in size and dancing ability.

"This isn't a waltz," Jessy said to him.

"
It isn't?"

"
It's a fox trot. Didn't you know that?"

"
No," he said. "Where did you learn so much about dancing?"

"
My mama, Jo Ellen, teaches ballroom on Tuesday nights at the senior center."

"
So what now?" he asked. "Should we bump into them?"

Jessy sighed loudly.
"Do I have to spell everything out? We'll just dance up to them and casually suggest changing partners."

"
What if they say no?"

"
They won't say no. They're too polite for that."

Maybe that snake Mackenzie was too polite to say no
, but Molly wasn't. He'd seen flashes of her temper on more than one occasion. She wouldn't hesitate to leave him standing there in the middle of the dance floor. "You've got it all planned, haven't you?" The little doctor was more complicated than he'd figured.

"
I'm goal-oriented," she said as he steered them across the dance floor. It was clear Spencer was her goal.

She reminded him a bit of Karen toward the end of their marriage. Karen had had that same single-minded quality
, and it had paid off for her. She'd managed to catch her man. Too bad the man she caught wasn't her husband. He'd never regretted letting Karen go without a fight, but lately he found himself wishing he'd fought for his daughter.

The sense of loss would grab him by the throat when he least expected it. He
'd be working on Molly's deck and happen to catch sight of her profiled in the window, her graceful hands resting on her round belly. He'd find himself wishing those were his hands on her belly, his child growing within her body, their future she dreamed about. He could ease her loneliness. He knew how.

He knew she could ease his pain.

They danced alongside Molly and the lawyer, and Jessy sprang into action.

#

Spencer was charming and personable and a wonderful dancer. He held her close but not too close. That wasn't her choice. She wanted to be held close, pressed up against his body. She wanted Spencer to kiss the side of her throat, to nuzzle her ear, to make her forget Rafe even existed. She leaned closer to him, and the baby chose that second to kick hard against her belly. He pulled away, looking startled.

"
Don't worry," she said, "The baby's not a black belt yet."

"
You're sure?" He laughed, but she caught a note of uncertainty in the sound.

"
Positive." She leaned closer to him again, and 'although he didn't pull away, she could feel his discomfort, which made her feel lonelier than she ever had when she was alone.

This is who
I am, Spencer,
she thought as he guided her around the floor.
Like it .or not, the baby is part of me.

He guided her around the floor with skill and flair. Lush music
, romantic atmosphere, a handsome partner, a child growing inside her womb—Molly had everything she could possibly want, and it wasn't close to enough. There was a deep, yearning emptiness inside her heart that not even the baby could fill. Maybe nothing ever could.

"
You haven't said a word," Spencer remarked as they danced closer to the patio doors at, the far end of the dance floor.

"
I'm enjoying the music," she said, then caught herself. "And the conversation, of course." Light and bright. Glib and facile. As insubstantial as cotton candy. Silence would resonate more deeply than this.

"
Is it the handyman?" Spencer asked. "I'm as surprised as you are that he showed up."

"
Of course it's not Rafe," she said.
Amazing, Molly. You lie like that, and your nose didn't grow a millimeter longer. Somebody up there mist like you.
"He's welcome to be here with us. I did give him the ticket, didn't I?"

"
You were hard-pressed to do anything else, given the situation. Four people in the room, four tickets in your hand. Most men would have realized you were being polite and refused."

"
He did refuse." She heard the snappish note in her voice and did nothing to soften it. "I wouldn't let him give back the ticket."

If that surprised Spencer
, he didn't let on. "Fine," he said, "but that didn't mean he had to show up."

"
Oh, for heaven's sake, Spencer, will you stop going on and on about this? From what I can see, he's Jessy's problem now, so why don't we just shut up and dance?"

She didn
't want to think about Rafe. She especially didn't want to think about him dancing with Jessy. Jessy looked doll-like in his arms, fragile and lovely. Molly looked anything but fragile these days. She was too ripely pregnant, all hips and breasts and hungers. The sight of them dancing together caused her physical pain.

"
Fancy meeting the two of you here." Jessy sounded almost giddy with delight as the two couples danced next to each other.

"
Small world," Spencer said, looking down at Jessy. "You'd think we shared a dinner table or something."

The remark didn
't warrant Jessy's gales of laughter. Jessy made another remark that didn't register on Molly.

It was spoken too low
for her to understand anything more than the slightly flirtatious tone of the words. Spencer said something back. Jessy laughed again and, a second later, Spencer and Jessy danced off together, leaving Molly and Rafe standing in the middle of the dance floor, looking at each other. As always, his expression was unknowable. It made her angry. She didn't want unknowable. She wanted passion and warmth and tenderness and everything else the human heart had to offer. Unknowable wasn't on the list.

The urge to
turn and run was almost overwhelming.

"
Looks like they served dinner," Molly said. "Maybe we should--"

"
Later."

He didn
't ask. He pulled her into his arms, and she didn't resist. She could have but she didn't. There was a moment when the decision was hers, when she could have pulled away and he would have let her go, but she let that moment pass.

"
Relax," he said as they started to sway to the music. "I won't hurt you."

You might
,
she thought. If she gave him that power over her, he might even break her heart.

She angled her body so that there was space between them. She didn
't want to give him the chance to pull back the way Spencer had. She wasn't sure she could handle a second rejection. Especially not from Rafe.

He moved forward slightly. She drew back. He increased the pressure of his hand against her back
, just enough to urge her closer to his body. To her surprise, her eyes filled with tears, and she looked down, desperate to regain control of herself and the situation. But it was too late for that.

"
You don't want to dance with me," he said, looking down at her.

"
I don't know what I want," she said honestly. She only knew what she didn't want. She didn't want him to turn away from her.

"
I'm a lousy dancer," he said, "but I do better if I can feel my partner."

She moved closer on a sigh. Her belly pressed against his intimately
, and he grinned. "That wasn't so hard, was it?"

She shook her head. The baby shifted position then
kicked hard. Rafe's eyes widened comically.

"
The baby kicked me," he said.

Her breath caught as she realized he hadn
't moved away from her. Their bodies were still locked in a dancers' embrace.

"
I know," she said cautiously. "Imagine how it feels from the inside."

He chuckled. The sound warmed her heart.
"What does it feel like from the inside?"

She thought about it for a moment.
"Normal," she said. "Isn't that strange? Another person is kicking me from the inside, and it feels utterly natural."

The baby launched a series of jabs that made both of
them laugh.

"
Boy or girl?" Rafe asked.

"
I don't know. The angle was wrong on the sonogram."

"
What are you hoping for?"

"
A girl," she said, "I've always wanted a daughter."

"
I hope you get your little girl."

"
Me, too," she said. It was such a nothing of a conversation. Why on earth was it having such an astonishing effect on her? "Don't tell anyone, but I'm knitting a pink-and-white sweater."

"
Pretty risky proposition," he said. "You have a fifty percent chance of being wrong."

"
And a fifty percent chance of being right," she said. "I'm the optimistic sort." She hadn't been for a very long time, but tonight, for the first time, she remembered how it had felt to be hopeful and happy. "Besides, I'll be just as happy if it's a little boy. The way I see it, if the baby's healthy I can't lose."

His touch changed. He didn
't pull her closer but he pulled her deeper. She couldn't explain it any other way. She rested her forehead against his shoulder and shut her eyes, letting the music wash over her like a benediction. He smelled wonderful—clean and male, with the slightest hint of something fresh and outdoorsy. Did he always smell like that? She could easily get high on that smell. It made her feel light-headed and loopy with pleasure. She wondered if you could fall in love with the smell of a man's skin. She'd never heard of such a thing but she was sure it was possible.