Obsession (Magnetic Desires Book 4) (10 page)

I practically pounced on the bartender. “Scotch. Whatever you’ve got.”

He nodded, and I slumped back on the stool. I wanted off this carnival ride. It took several glasses of scotch and one long staggering trip to the bathroom for me to realize I wasn’t going anywhere. I couldn’t run away anymore. There were only two ways to move beyond the mess I’d clung to. The one my mother had taken the day I’d found her after she’d overdosed, or to push through it.

I didn’t want to spend the rest of my life trying to fill the holes in me with inconsequential shit. With dicks that didn’t matter, just so I could avoid getting hurt. There was supposed to be more to life than pain. Everyone else dealt with it. Lola had dealt with it and found happiness. My other friends, Clo and Birdie, had too. Holding onto it made everything worse, and Mike was offering a chance at happiness that might not come my way again. Was it worth taking? I could let myself find happiness with him again. I wanted that more than I’d ever wanted anything.

I pulled my phone from my purse to call him, surprised at how much time had passed while I’d sat here drowning myself in liquor. I’d told myself over and over again that I didn’t need anyone. I didn’t need my sister who’d ran away, I didn’t need my father who’d walked out on me, I didn’t need my mother who’d essentially been gone since the day Lola went missing, even if she clung on to life as long as she had. But it wasn’t true. It didn’t make me a better person, it didn’t make me stronger. It made me crazy, it made me cowardly, and it only added to the emptiness and fear that had been my constant companion.

And yet I didn’t think to run to Mike. I bolted. I let my emotions tumble out of control, spinning me around until I didn’t know which way was up or down. I’d told him we’d talk tonight, instead I found a bar I could destroy myself in. But that’s what I did, who I was. A never ending hurricane, ruining everything good in my life, and hurting the people I cared for. That’s why they’d given me the title. Because I was fucked up beyond all repair. Because damage was the only thing I was good at creating. How could I not be though, with a sperm donor like mine? Mike told me time and time again I didn’t have to be like my father, but I couldn’t help it, couldn’t change it. So why the hell try to combat it? I would never be good at being a person, I’d never be good enough to be with Mike. I’d destroy him if I got the chance, like everything else in my life. There was no happy ever after for him and I. It would be better if I nipped what we’d started in the bud. I’d always be a hurricane. There was no point fighting it.

“To letting the hurricane burn itself out,” I mumbled, lifting the glass of scotch to my lips and draining it, before waving it at the bartender. “More.”

I watched him pour more of the amber liquid into the glass. No, Mike

didn’t deserve a girl like me. He deserved so much better. Someone well adjusted. A perfect little princess, the type of girl I’d make fun of behind her back. That was what Mike deserved, not this hot mess staring at herself in the mirrors behind the rows of bottles at the back of the bar.

My phone vibrated across the bar top as a text lit up the screen.
Where the fuck are you hiding, Hurricane?

“Keep this filled please.” I said to the bartender, and turned on my stool to see if I could find anything that would tell me where I had ended up. Casablanca quotes lined the walls, and I smiled, remembering another time, when I’d come here with Mike. Those days had been heaven. I texted him back and shoved my phone in my purse. He deserved far more than I could ever give him. My heart hollowed out. Tonight I would turn those memories of heaven upside down. I’d do what it took to help him realize I wasn’t good enough for him. If he wanted a fucking hurricane, I’d give him one.

Mike

Everything was ready, the food prepared, the wine chilling. I’d run over every damn line of my explanation a dozen times. I checked my watch again as I wiped down the counter one final time. She’d finished work hours ago. I screwed up my brow. What the hell would be keeping her? She wouldn’t change her mind. That much I was sure of. I dumped the rag in the sink, and glanced out the window in time to catch Lola bolt from her car across the road. The two girls were identical, but Lola was quieter, her demeanor laid back compared to Mellie’s edginess. Even from a distance I’d be able to tell them apart and know which one pulled me to her.

I met her at the kitchen door. “Hey, Lola, what are you doing here?”

Slipping inside, she ran her hands over her ponytail, smoothing the fly away wisps before clasping them in front of her. “Is Mellie here?”

“No, she’s not.” I raised an eyebrow at her implication. “Why would you think she’d be here?”

“Because she was going to come here after she left my place. She said you were talking about…” Lola fluttered her hands like a butterfly’s wings. “Never mind. She kind of lost it, and she won’t answer her phone or anything. I just wanted to make sure she was all right.”

“What do you mean she kind of lost it?”

“Well, she saw our father—”

“Your father?”
Fuck, no wonder she lost it.
I rubbed at the back of my neck, my frustration ratcheting up at her announcement. “What’s that bastard doing in Reverence?”

She jerked back as though I’d snapped at her, then cast a glance at the floor before setting her jaw. “I asked him to come. Family is important, and I missed out on so much of it.”

“You’re damn right family is important, but that man didn’t give two fucks about your sister, or you, even after…” I trailed off, unsure how much Mellie had explained to Lola about their mother’s death.

“He’s made mistakes, but haven’t we all?” She shook her head. “Anyway, that isn’t the point. I didn’t get a chance to tell her he was here, before she saw him and she flipped the hell out. And now I can’t get a hold of her. She didn’t go home and she won’t answer her phone. Do you think she would have gone to Orion’s, or how about Birdie’s? I just want to make sure she’s all right.”

“Shit. No, not when she’s explosive.” I stalked away from her, leaned against the counter top, my shoulders bunched. An ache started in my temples. “Well, at least that explains why she didn’t show up.”

Clearing her throat, she shuffled over and put her hand on my arm. “I don’t know where to look.”

“Don’t worry about it.” I grasped her arm gently, leading her toward the door.
We’re only in the middle of a hurricane. Who knows what destruction the woman could wreak while she’s holed up God knows where.
“She’ll be okay. You’re best off going home.”

“Do you think?” Her attempt at a smile was tight, and didn’t last more than a fraction of a second before she dropped her head, her bangs falling in her face. “I should have warned her.”

“You should have, but you didn’t know how she’d react.” Ushering her along the porch, I led her down the stairs. “But I can tell you that if she wanted you to find her, she’d let you know. I’d let her be for a couple days.”

Exiting the yard, we crossed to her car, and I pulled open the door, holding it for her, my weight shifting from foot to foot. “She’s got some pretty strong feelings about that father of yours. You can’t expect her to want to see him after he walked out on her and your mother.”

“Okay. I guess.” She bit her lip, hesitating.

Blowing out a breath, I scratched the back of my head. Fuck it. Of course I was going to find her. “Look, I’ll see if I can track her down. If I find her, I’ll let you know.”

“Thanks.” Finally, she hopped in her car, and I jogged back inside to get my keys.

***

If there was one damn thing I’d change about Mellie, it was the way she ran when shit got too real. Her father showed up and she lost her shit. It was an easy bet that she’d found her way to the nearest pub or bar. So I headed there, too. Except she wasn’t at any of the six pubs in town. My hands clenched around the steering wheel, I ground my teeth while I drove out to Wolf’s. If she was there, if she couldn’t keep her damn promises, I’d… fuck, I didn’t know what I’d do. It wasn’t like I could chastise her for behaving like a child. But I’d sure as hell drag her ass out of there.

Only she wasn’t there, either. I got back in the truck and texted her.
Where the fuck are you hiding, Hurricane?

Minutes later I got a one-line text message back.
Where I’m going, you can’t follow.

I tapped my fingers on the steering wheel. What hell kind of message was that? Furrowing my brow, I rubbed my temples, trying to shake loose whatever memory was ebbing at the corner of my mind. It was a definite reference. There was something. Like the words of a song, it came slowly, line by line. Shit, it was a club in Carlton. They had Casablanca quotes on the walls, a piano in the corner, and last time we’d been there, she’d danced on the bar until dawn.

I tore out of the lot. Last time I hadn’t minded her dancing. In fact I’d enjoyed it, but it had been my hands all over her, my mouth on her belly while I took a shot from her navel. We’d been wild, crazy, and insatiable for each other. Those were some heady days, driven by booze, an insane amount of fucking, and the belief we were invincible.

Well I wasn’t invincible, and I was tired of chasing the hurricane. Not when she should have known by now she could run
to
me. How she’d never worked that out during our relationship, and even after, as friends, was beyond me. Hell, she called me when a one-night stand went wrong, but not for her father showing up in town. I slammed my hand down on the steering wheel.
Not anymore.

***

I stormed across the hardwood floor of the club toward the blonde dancing wildly on the bar. Jaw clenched, I hustled through the unusually large group of people crowding her. Didn’t these people have anything better to do on a Thursday night? Jostling them out of the way, heedless to whom I elbowed on my way, I finally moved into the spot right in front of her.

She did a slow wobbly spin, shaking her ass at the next closest guy. His hands found her knee and tried to pull her to him, but she staggered out of his reach and yelled at the bartender. “Where’s my drink?”

“I’m cutting you off after this one.” He shook his head then fetched the scotch from the top shelf.

“Cut her off now,” I roared. Her gaze landed on me, the grin on her face crashing. “Get your ass down here.”

She shook her head, her hair whipping around her face while she continued to sway out of time with the blaring music. My chest tightened under her lingering gaze, the yearning in her eyes, before she lifted her chin and yelled over the noise. “Everyone, this is Mike. Best shag you will ever be privileged to meet.”

One of the girls at the edge of the table giggled, then hiccupped, her hands racing to cover her face. A fist on her hip, Mellie’s grin didn’t touch the smouldering pain in her gaze before she shuttered it from me. “He’s available if you want a piece.”

Glaring at her, I growled as fingers pinched my ass. “You’re full of shit, Melanie Albrict, now get down before I drag you down.”

“I don’t think so, Tiger.”

It had been years since she’d called me Tiger, and it stunned me, causing me to lurch back. She was still so undeniably mine, but she was pushing me even harder than she had before.

In the moment it took me to recover, she whirled on the bar and fell on her ass. “Ouch. That’s going to bruise.” A giggle ripped from her, and then she started tugging off her boots.

“What the hell do you think you’re doing?”

“You used to like it when I danced.” She hauled off the second boot, and held it up in her hand. “I’m sure these people would like to see what I can do.”

A collective titter of agreement went up among the group, and I sprang at her. “You’re in a bar, Hurricane. Keep your damn clothes on.” 

Scrambling to her feet she yanked her leg free before I could get a decent grip on her thigh. She fumbled with the waist of her skirt, and it tumbled down to reveal black silk and suspenders. “I’m having fun. Go home, Mike. I don’t need you here.”

Pissed off and hard as fuck at the idea of how I should have been removing those damn suspenders at the end of the night, I snarled at the crowd, and climbed up on the bar. “I know you’re upset, idiot. But when are you going to realize making a scene isn’t going to solve the problem?”

She winced, her eyes watering, and then she pushed her chin out, her neck cording, and hissed through her teeth, “I’m making a scene? You’re the one who’s ruining our fun.”

“Let her finish her dance, dude,” some guy at the end of the bar yelled.

I wanted to smash his face in. Instead, I focused fully on her and the way her fingers clutched at the edge of her shirt. “Are you really trying to tell me you’re having fun? You’re running again. It’s what you fucking do best.”

“Yeah, I was taught well.” She whipped the shirt over her head and ran her palms over her bra. “You want these, tiger? You licked it, you own it, right?”

“You’re damn right. I licked it, I own it, and I’m taking it home.” I shoved her shirt back over her head, and she winced as her hair got tangled in the lace. “Now put your fucking skirt back on and say goodbye to your friends. We’re done here.”

I jumped down off the bar, whirled around and snaked an arm around her thighs, dragging her skirt back up before hauling her down like I should have when I first walked in the door. She struggled for a moment, beating at my shoulders with her fists. “You’re supposed to hate me. You’re all kinds of fucked in the head.”

What the hell?
Here I thought we were getting a second chance, and instead, she was trying to drive me away. “You’re pushing my buttons, Hurricane. You want to make me angry, you’re succeeding, but if you think I’m going to go away so easily, you’re dead wrong. You forget how fucking well I know you.”

She sobbed, her arms winding around me she smashed her mouth to mine, her lips clinging to me as though she could never get enough, frantically moving over my jaw and throat to settle against my ear. “Why do you always have to show up to save me? I don’t need you. I don’t need anyone.”

“Of course you do.” I squeezed her tighter, while the storm raged inside her.

“Why? Everyone leaves. They say they love you and then they leave.” She pushed back to face me. There was a tautness in her face, in the way she brought her nose to mine, staring deep into my eyes. “I’ll leave, too, you know. I’ll break your fucking heart two times over if you let me. You know that, right? You fall in love with a storm, do you really think you’ll make it through in one piece?”

I flicked a glance at the roof, rolled my eyes. It was getting hot in here, the music overwhelming, and my patience waned. I grasped her jaw tightly between my fingers. “I know I’m going to fuck that stupid idea right out of that pretty head of yours.”

She pushed me away, slid down my body. “I’m not going home with you. I’m not yours, tiger.” Her face clouded, and then she whirled around. “Do you know why I call him Tiger?” She sniggered and rolled her eyes. “Because he purrs when he cums.”

A few of the people still watching her making a spectacle of herself chuckled. Every muscle in my body bunched, and I gripped her arm, growling as I yanked her back into me. “That’s enough.”

She shivered against me, then pushed out of my grip. “Don’t you get it? I don’t want to be the person you have to save.”

She stalked over to the closest guy, the one who’d had his hands on her earlier. “Hey, you.” She curled her fingers in his shirt, pulled him close. “Want to take me home?”

“Touch her.” I stared him down while I advanced on them, my fists clenched, a homicidal tick jumping at the side of my jaw. “And I will break your fucking hand.”

He stepped back, palms up, and I snaked an arm around her. “Fine, you want to do this the hard way, we’ll do it the hard way.” I lifted her up, pinned her over my shoulder with a slap to her ass. “This shit is over. Do you hear me? You can hate on me as much as you want, but we’re leaving.”

“Put me down,” she snapped, struggling against my hold, but the only way she was getting down was when I poured her drunken, ridiculous ass into the truck.

“Not a fucking chance.” I huffed and pushed my way through the crowd.

“I was having fun,” she whined as we hit the pavement. “Why did you have to ruin it?”

The fresh air cooled my skin, pulled the heat from my insides. “You weren’t having fun. You were pushing me away in there. It won’t work.”

“It should.”

“Yeah.” I scraped the back of my head with my hand. “It probably should, but it won’t. Now let’s get you home.” 

“I don’t want to go home.” She stopped struggling, hung limp over my shoulder. “I know I’m being a brat, but could we not go back tonight? I don’t want to be in the same town as that man. I’ll be okay tomorrow.”

What would it hurt?
“Sure. I’ll find us a hotel.” The truck was only a block from the bar, but driving would distract me when I needed to keep a firm grip on the situation. In her current mood she was liable to do anything, and I wasn’t going to give her the space to try and push me away again. Instead, I hailed a cab and pulled out my phone to find the nearest available room, keeping her over my shoulder while the taxi stopped in front of us, and then stuffing her in the back before climbing in beside her. Giving the man directions, I stared at the back of her head since she kept her face turned to the window. In the morning, I’d come back for my truck and work out where the hell she’d parked her car.