Authors: Susan Lewis
‘I was such a bloody fool to fall for it all,’ she seethed. ‘And to think that I’m sitting here actually hoping that he’ll get in touch again! I can’t believe I’m doing it! And even if he did, which obviously he won’t, I’d tell him where to go.’
‘Why? If you ask me it sounds like he was pretty keen.’
‘Don’t say things like that Paula, it only encourages me, and I can’t get him out of my mind as it is. But he won’t get in touch, because no matter what he said I was only for one night and I just have to learn to live with that. And if he does call me, then I’ll bloody well let him know that it makes no difference to me who he is, I’m just not being messed around like that.’
‘Are you
sure
Luke Fitzpatrick wasn’t behind it all?’ Paula asked.
‘You’re forgetting, I saw the pictures of Cristos and Paige Spencer together myself. Luke couldn’t have arranged that. But yeah, I reckon he might have said something to Cristos that night, it would be just like him to. Felicity thinks he did too. She’s been trying to reach me for days, but we just keep missing each other. I told her to call me at the office, but she said that she definitely didn’t want to speak to me there. Anyway, it’s not about Cristos, that much she has told me.’
‘Which means, if she won’t speak to you at the office, that it could be about Luke?’
‘Or Annalise. Most likely Luke though. He was still with her when I left for San Francisco, so maybe something happened. Anyway, Luke Fitzpatrick in Los Angeles is another story in itself.’
‘That man should have been strangled at birth,’ Paula stated furiously when Corrie had finished telling her all that he’d done. ‘And Annalise needs a damned good kick up the jacksie. I’m sorry, I know she’s your sister …’
‘Half-sister.’
‘OK, half-sister – which is another thing, Corrie Browne, have you told her that yet?’
‘No.’
‘Then I think you should. If she knew that you were related she might be more inclined to listen to what you’re telling her about Luke.’
‘Believe me, Paula, knowing we’re related isn’t going to make any difference to Annalise. She’s totally obsessed with the man. And remember what my father said, he’ll deny all knowledge of me if I so much as mention it to anyone. Oh shit! I’m going to cry again. I never seem to stop bloody crying these days.’ She took out her handkerchief and blew her nose, but the tears just wouldn’t stop coming. ‘Oh, Paula,’ she sighed, ‘I know it’s pathetic but I wish Mum were here. I really miss her still.’
‘I know you do.’
Corrie sniffed and tried again to stem the tears. ‘Can you imagine what she’d say if I told her about Cristos?’ she smiled. ‘She’d just die. Oh God, what an expression to choose! She hasn’t even been dead seven months and already I’m hob-nobbing around the world with any number of celebrities. It makes me feel so ashamed sometimes, it’s as though I couldn’t wait for her to die.’
‘Oh, Corrie, don’t be so hard on yourself,’ Paula said
sternly
. ‘It’s what she wanted, that you should find a life for yourself.’
‘I know. And look what a mess I’m making of it. Besides, there are times when none of it seems to matter without her here to share it.’
‘It’s understandable that you should feel that way right now,’ Paula soothed. ‘But I’m sure she knows what’s going on, that she’s up there somewhere, watching over you.’
‘Do you think so?’
‘I’m sure of it.’
‘Oh, I wish I could speak to her. That I could hear her say something to me. Death is so final, isn’t it?’
‘Do you mean that?’ Paula said. ‘That you’d like to hear her speak to you?’
‘Oh God, don’t tell me you’re thinking of sending me to a clairvoyant,’ Corrie cried.
‘No, it’s not that,’ Paula answered softly. ‘It’s … Look, I don’t know if now is the right time to tell you this, it’s probably not in fact, but … well I’m going to anyway. I found a letter, some time ago now, when I was turning the mattress. It’s addressed to you, and it’s from Edwina. I haven’t read it, so I don’t know what it says, but … Well, it’s up to you …’
Corrie buried her face in her hands. ‘I don’t know. I’m not sure that I could handle it right now.’
‘How about if I give it to you, then you can read it when you feel up to it?’
Corrie’s distress was evident the moment she saw her mother’s handwriting. ‘It’s no good,’ she said, ‘I’ll have to read it now, do you mind?’
‘Of course not.’ Paula poured her some more wine then went to check on the baby so that Corrie could read the letter privately.
It was a very long letter, most of it telling Corrie the truth about her father, and begging forgiveness for not being honest when she was alive. She realized she should
never
have made the story up in the first place, but when Corrie was still a child and wanted so desperately to know about her father, had so badly wanted to be loved by her father she, Edwina, couldn’t bring herself to disillusion her.
‘Then, as the years went by,’ she wrote, ‘I too almost came to believe that Phillip was dead. It was better that way, because I was always afraid knowing about you would make no difference to him, that Phillip wouldn’t want you, and I couldn’t bear to think of you being so hurt. But there have been so many times when I have come so close to telling you, times when I knew you should leave me, that your own life was being ruined by mine. So often I have dreamed of the two of you being together, of you finding happiness with him, and having someone there to love and care for you when I died. May God forgive me that I never found the courage, Corrie, but please try to understand it was only because I love you so very, very much. If you do go to find him, sweetheart, then please try to be patient with him and don’t judge him too harshly. He’s a weak man, but he’s a man of deep kindness and sensitivity too. He was the only man I ever loved, and as his daughter – our daughter – you have given me all the joy a woman could ever need in her life.
‘This letter will be doubly hard for you to read because by the time you receive it I won’t be with you anymore. But please know, my darling, that though you can’t see me I am watching over you all the time, and that I love you very, very much.’
When Paula came back into the room and saw the tears running down Corrie’s face, she simply took the letter, put an arm around Corrie and read it herself. By the time she had finished she too was crying.
They held one another for a long time, until Corrie said,
‘I’m going to try again with Phillip, Paula. I know I could be wasting my time, but … Maybe I can reach him, if only for Annalise’s sake.’
‘Yes, I think you should,’ Paula said, ‘for both your sakes. But don’t rush things. You’re still pretty vulnerable right now and the last thing I want to see is you hurt again.’
‘OK!’ Jeannie cried, clapping her hands for quiet as she walked headlong into the pandemonium, ‘let’s have some quiet around here.’
Cristos came into the production office behind her and several of the production team watched him as he walked over to the schedule cards pinned over one wall of the office. They were in the process of planning the trip to England now, since the New Hampshire filming was through and the second unit had the cast out in Italy.
Jeannie waited until phone calls were finished and all mobile as well as land lines were turned off, then said, ‘Just in case any of you didn’t already know, the guy who’s been watching dailies and rough cuts with Cristos this past week is Pierre Montbastion. He’s the guy who’s selecting the movies for the next festival in Cannes. And …’ She paused, looking into each of their faces as they waited to hear the results, ‘
Past Lives Present
was just accepted for entry!’ she announced triumphantly.
A cheer went up, and as everyone else applauded the two line-producers went over to shake Cristos by the hand. He accepted their congratulations cordially enough, but reminded them, as he continued to run his eyes over the editing schedule he was holding, that they weren’t there yet.
‘We still gotta lot to get through,’ he added, looking round the office, ‘and we don’t have a lot of time. Getting finished is as much in your hands as mine, and I’m telling you now, I catch any one of you guys not pulling his – or her – weight around here then you’re not gonna hit the floor with your hat. Have you got me?’ As everyone nodded and murmured his eyes came to rest on Jeannie. ‘A word.’
Almost instantly the noise erupted again as production managers, unit managers, line-producers, production coordinators, assistants and accountants got back on the phones, and Jeannie walked through the maze of desks to where Cristos was standing. One look at his face was enough for her to see that he was still as mad as hell.
‘Don’t you liaise with these boys out here?’ he snapped. ‘You got me editing when we’re in England. How the fuck can I be in two places at once?’
‘Lance is coming out to England,’ Jeannie reminded him gently. ‘You requested it yourself, so you could get ahead.’
Cristos glared at her, then turning back to the schedule board, said tightly, ‘There’s nothing here about Wiltshire.’
‘Detailth going up this afternoon,’ Jeannie said, pointing to a card at the bottom of the board, and if she didn’t feel so sorry for him she might have laughed at the look on his face at being thwarted again.
‘Do you have any preference which hotel you stay at in London, Cristos?’ one of the production managers suddenly yelled out.
‘No,’ Cristos answered. He turned back to Jeannie. ‘Get onto Fitzpatrick, find out if he knows of a house to rent for David Easton and his family. I’ll be with Lance if anyone’s looking for me,’ and before Jeannie could make any comment he walked out of the room.
‘For a guy who’s got a lot to feel happy about he sure is sore about something,’ one of the production managers remarked, when he was certain Cristos was no longer in earshot.
‘Mmm, or someone,’ Jeannie answered, still looking at the door.
‘Oh?’ Everyone was immediately interested, and laughing Jeannie followed Cristos out of the office leaving them, she knew, to speculate over his affair with Paige Spencer.
When she returned to her own office, adjoining Cristos’s, Jeannie found her husband sitting at her desk using the
phone
. Hearing the voice at the other end, barking into the receiver, and seeing how twitchy it was making Richard she started to grin. Eventually Richard put the phone down, and taking him by the hand to pull him out of her chair, Jeannie said, ‘Just get your head bitten off, did you?’
‘Damned right I did,’ Richard answered, glaring down at the telephone. ‘What the hell’s eating him anyway? He’s been like this for days.’
‘Who.’ Jeannie corrected him. ‘You mean
who
the hell’s eating him? The answer is a woman.’
Richard waved a hand dismissively. ‘Women never get to Cristos,’ he snorted.
‘Well this one has.’
Richard’s eyes widened, then he started to shake his head. ‘Nah, you got it wrong, Jeannie. This isn’t about Paige Spencer, she just doesn’t mean that much to him.’
‘Did I say it was Paige Spencer?’
Richard eyed her suspiciously. ‘Then who?’ he said.
‘Come on, guess. You said yourself he’s been ticked this past week. And you got to have noticed, the closer we get to going to England the worse he’s getting.’
‘You’re kidding? You’re not telling me he’s got himself hooked up on that English broad who was here with Fitzpatrick’s outfit?’
‘That’s what I’m telling you. Her name’s Corrie Browne by the way.’
Richard grinned. ‘Well, I’ll be darned. How do you know?’
‘Let’s just say I know Cristos.’
‘What’s he say about her?’
‘He doesn’t, that’s not his style. But I’m telling you this is to do with her all right. I tried to talk to him about it the other day …’
‘You did!’ Richard interrupted in amazement. ‘I didn’t know you were so brave. What’d he say?’
‘Just that it wasn’t something he wanted to discuss. I
guess
it was the way he said it that told me how bad it really was. It’s driving him crazy …’
Richard was looking doubtful again. ‘You sure you got this right, Jeannie? I mean, she’s hardly his type, is she?’
‘Meaning she doesn’t have yards of blonde hair, a gap in her legs right up to her fanny and pouty little lips? Cristos has had his fill of women like that, Richard, honey. He crooks that little old finger of his and they just come a-running.’
‘All right, then why doesn’t he do something about this Corrie Browne instead of going about the place getting pissed at everyone?’
Jeannie shrugged. ‘So he says, she’s a star-fucker.’
At that Richard just roared with laughter. ‘Cristos Bennati gets hooked on a star-fucker! I’ve heard it all now. Does she know?’
‘What do you think?’ Jeannie answered, kissing him on the nose. ‘Besides she’s no star-fucker. OK, I know what you’re gonna say, and sure she leapt right into bed with him, but I’ve met her, and I’m telling you she’s no star-fucker. And, despite what he says, Cristos knows it too. He’s still raw over that business with Angelique,’ she went on solemnly. ‘And who can blame him? It’ll be pretty damned difficult for him to trust a woman again after that. He doesn’t want to get involved and he’s mad as hell at himself ’cos he knows it’s happening whether he likes it or not.’
‘Shit! Your powers of deduction just leave me standing,’ Richard groaned.
‘I know, honey,’ Jeannie grinned picking up the phone to answer it. Immediately she drew her head back as Bud Winters’ voice bellowed down the line, ‘Where the fuck’s Bennati? I just heard the news. Tell him to get himself over here, we got champagne waiting for him.’
‘I’ll tell him,’ Jeannie laughed, and hung up. ‘I’ll bet
Cristos
is just in the mood to drink champagne with Bud Winters,’ she remarked to Richard.
Richard was looking thoughtful. ‘You know, if you’re right about this, Jeannie, then it looks like we could be in for one bumpy ride over there in England.’
Jeannie shook her head. ‘Not if I got anything do with it we won’t.’
‘Jeannie!’ Richard warned.
‘Yes?’ she said, all innocence.
‘You know what I’m talking about,’ he told her. ‘And who’s to say you haven’t got it wrong over this Corrie woman. I mean I don’t care what you say, it sounds pretty unlikely to me. The man only spent one night with her.’