Nuptials for Sale (11 page)

Josh shrugged, “I don’t know.  I guess it never came up.”

“It never came up!  Are you serious?  You’ve been talking about this girl since the day I met you.”  Mike reached for another beer.

I glanced over at Josh, but he avoided my gaze.

“We didn’t say anything because we didn’t want it to be weird between all our friends if things didn’t work out.”  I answered the guys.

“Well, it’s about time you did work it out.”  Tommy smiled at me. 

The guys managed to get all the new living room furniture put together and drag out several pieces of the old stuff before leaving.  It was nearly midnight when they left and I was exhausted, both from the long day and the pressure of keeping up appearances around them.

“I don’t know how we’re going to get through this,” I said as I plopped down on the new couch.

“We’ll get the rest of this stuff out of here tomorrow, and then we’ll be able to arrange everything the way we want it.”  Josh fell down next to me on the couch.

“That’s not what I’m talking about, Josh.  How are we going to keep up the appearance of a happily married couple?” I sat up and asked him.

“It’s not that hard.”

I looked him.

“Not that hard?  Are you kidding me?  What are we supposed to do when people come over?  How are we going to hide the fact that we sleep in separate bedrooms?  What are we going to do when your dad comes to visit and we don’t have a guest room for him because we each have our own room?  When this whole thing is over with, how are we supposed to fake our way through a relationship around our friends and family?”

“I don’t know, Mel.  I guess we’ll just do our best.”  He had his eyes closed and was leaning back against the couch.

“No, Josh.  We need to figure this stuff out now!  We need to figure out a plan for how to make this work and then how to get out of this.”

He groaned and said, “Would you just relax?  I figure we can fake our way through a year or so and then just get out of it.”

I stood up.  “A year?  Holy shit, Josh!  You want to stay married for a whole year?”

His eyes opened and he said loudly, “What’s the big deal, Mel?  It’s not like you haven’t already been living with me for a year already.”

“That’s different, Josh.  I was living here as your roommate.  People are expecting us to be living here as husband and wife.  Do you understand what that means?” 

He just raised his eyebrows in question. 

“If I’m living here as your wife then that means you can’t go out to the bars and pick up random redheads to bring home.  Are you sure you can handle not doing that for a whole year?”

He shrugged as if it was nothing, “I just won’t bring them here, besides it’s not like I do that now.”

“Are you ready for the ramifications if you are labeled as a cheater?  Are you sure you want to polarize our friends like that?  We can’t just laugh off a divorce, Josh.  People are going to expect us to be upset about it.  Hell, we’re going to have to hire lawyers and shit.  Are you prepared for that?”

I could feel all the questions and doubts I’d had spilling out of me.  Maybe it was because I was tired, or maybe it was because the wedding was getting close, but I couldn’t stop all the stuff that was coming out of me.

I would have continued but suddenly Josh stood up and started shouting.  “I don’t understand what the big deal is, Mel.  Is the idea of being married to me so horrid that you can’t do it for a whole year?  For Christ’s sake, you were with that asshole Stephen for over a year and he treated you like shit!”

Josh had never brought Stephen up to me.  Even when he’d kicked me out and left me homeless, Josh had never said a bad word about him. 

“He did not treat me like shit!” I shouted back in defense.

Josh scoffed, “He was awful, Mel.  He put you down all the time.  He made you change to suit him.  You’re still trying to get yourself back from all the damage he did to you.”  Josh shouted at me.  “Plus, I know he hit you at least once.  You tried to hide the bruise, but I saw it.  I swore that if you ever came to me with bruises again that I was going to kill him!”

I backed away from him.  I had never told anyone about the time Stephen had hit me.  It had only happened once, but it was enough.  It was a month before he kicked me out.  I started to cry, not at the memory of what Stephen had done to me, but at the truth that Josh was spitting out at me.

The tears didn’t stop him, though. 

“I don’t understand why you want to get out of this so badly?  Am I that repulsive to you that you can’t take the idea of being married to me?” 

I started sobbing. 

Josh grabbed his keys and left the apartment.

The door slammed behind him and I fell to the floor.  Josh and I had never fought like that before.  We’d argued, but we’d never screamed at each other.  It hurt to hear him say those things to me.  I never knew that he hated Stephen so much. 

I sat on the floor for over an hour, crying and hoping that Josh would come back.  Eventually, I was too tired to wait any longer.  It was past two a.m. and I had to go to work in the morning. 

I squeezed past the boxes in the hall and stumbled into bed fully dressed. 

13.

When my alarm went off the next morning, my eyes were still puffy and aching.  I did my best to use make up to cover up the fact that I’d been crying, but even I wasn’t convinced. 

There were no telltale signs of Josh in the apartment that morning, but with all the boxes and extra furniture, it was almost impossible to get to anything.  I didn’t bother eating breakfast. My stomach was too knotted up for food anyway.

I sat in my cubicle and kept to myself.  I spent half the day composing an apology e-mail to Josh, but never could get the wording right so I never sent it.  It seemed cowardly to apologize over e-mail anyway.  I was just about to shut my computer down for the day when I got an e-mail from personnel.  My vacation request for the next week, our honeymoon week, had gone through. 

My eyes welled up with tears again when I thought about the honeymoon my parents had so graciously given to us.  How was I going to pay them back for that gift? 

I shut my station down and gathered my things, all with a few tears left in my eyes.  I hated the feeling of not knowing where things stood with Josh.  As I left the building, I wished I had sent that e-mail. 

“Hey girl!” a familiar voice called out to me just as I got to my car.

I looked up to see Carrie, Jody, and Sasha standing against the railing in the parking lot.  The girls were all dressed up, which was unusual for them.  I’d known the girls since my freshman year of college and we’ve all been through a lot of changes since then. 

Carrie was married with an infant son.  Jody had taken the corporate road and was barely seen out of a business suit.  Sasha, who was married to Tommy, was a teacher and expecting her third child.  Seeing the three of them standing by my car dressed in sequins and heels was a bit of a shock.

“What’s going on?” I asked suspiciously, taking in their outfits again.

“We’re kidnapping you!” Carrie said playfully.

“What?”

Sasha giggled and waddled over to me, “It’s a kidnap Bachelorette Party!” 

My face went white.  How could I explain the situation to them? 

“Don’t even think about it!” Jody grabbed my arm and pulled me towards the car.  “You are not going to weasel your way out of this.  I took a whole afternoon off to do this.”

“And I squeezed my seven months pregnant swollen feet into these heels so that we could go out and have a good time before you get hitched, so get in the car and don’t argue!” Sasha held the door to her minivan open as Jody pushed me in.

“What about my car?” I asked when the girls had me stuffed in the van. 

“Don’t worry about your car.  Tommy is going to swing Josh by to get it before they go out tonight.”  Sasha said as she pulled out of the parking lot.

The mention of Josh shocked me.

“So, did you speak to him?”

“Josh?” she looked at me from the rearview mirror.  “This whole thing was his idea.  He called me this morning and we rushed to put it all together.”

“Speaking of rushing?” Jody turned in her seat to face me.  “First of all, what is the deal with you two not telling any of us that you were dating?  Secondly, why is this wedding happening so fast?  You aren’t joining the momsquad are you?” She eyed my stomach, as if she expected a bump to appear there magically.

Sasha and Carrie laughed at the nickname we’d given them since becoming mothers.  Normally, I would have laughed too, but the emotion of the fight I’d had with Josh, the surprise of my friends kidnapping me for a bachelorette party, and the news that Josh had arranged the whole thing got to me. 

The sobs broke out of me before I could stop them. 

“Shit!  You are pregnant, aren’t you?” Jody shouted when she saw my tears.

Sasha pulled the van over and parked.  She and Carrie both unbuckled and turned around. 

“Give her a tissue!” Sasha pointed to the diaper bag at Jody’s feet.

Jody picked it up and frantically sorted through it.  “All I can find are diapers and wipes!”

“Who cares?  Just hand her something!” Carrie shouted.

Jody shoved something in my hands and I used it to wipe my eyes.  I steadied myself enough to stop the tears, but I was still choking on sobs.  The girls watched me with worried looks as I slowly began to calm down.

“Mel, are you pregnant?” Carrie asked me slowly.

I shook my head.

“Oh thank goodness!” Jody said with relief.

Sasha smacked her on the knee and threw her a look.

“What’s wrong Mel?” Carrie asked, trying to get the girls to focus on me again.

I wanted desperately to tell them everything.  Besides Josh, these girls were the ones who had been there for me through so much.  It felt wrong keeping the truth from them, but I also knew that if I told them they’d never forgive me for going through with it.  I steadied my breathing and told them what I could.

“Josh and I had a huge fight last night and I haven’t talked to him since he stormed out of the apartment.” I spit it all out in one breath then started crying again.

Carrie and Sasha both let out a sigh of relief. 

Jody just looked at them with surprise.

“Mel, Tommy and I fought every day in the weeks leading up to our wedding.  It’s just so stressful to have one of those damn things.  We’ve already decided that we will pay our kids to elope.” Sasha patted me on the knee as she spoke.

“Jayce and I almost called the whole thing off like four times before the wedding day.  I’m sure it’s all going to be fine.” Carrie added with a reassuring tone.

Both girls looked at Jody to see what words of comfort she would offer.

“I don’t know anything about weddings and fights,” she said hesitantly. 

The other girls shot her another look and she twisted to avoid another hit by Sasha.  “But, I do know Josh, and I know how he feels about you.  No matter what the fight was about, I’m sure that it hasn’t changed the way he feels about you.”