Nom Nom Paleo: Food for Humans (62 page)

2
tablespoons
lard
or fat of choice, divided
½
pound
cremini mushrooms,
minced
4
ounces
bacon
, frozen and cross-cut into small pieces
1
pound
ground beef
1
½
teaspoons
kosher salt
Freshly ground
black pepper
1
ripe heirloom
tomato
, sliced
4
butter lettuce leaves
, rinsed and dried
8
whole
Roasted Portobello Mushrooms
(optional)

• Slow-Roasted Tomatoes
  
• Caramelized Onions
  
• Roasted Bell Peppers
  
• Paleo Mayonnaise
  
• Paleo Sriracha
  
• Sriracha Mayonnaise
  
• Quick-Pickled Carrot Strings
  
• Spicy Pineapple Salsa
  
• Holy ’Moly (Easy Guacamole)
  
• Paleo Ranch Dressing
  
• Louisiana Rémoulade
  

1. H
   eat
   1
   tablespoon of the lard in a cast-iron skillet over medium heat, and sauté the cremini mushrooms until the liquid they release has cooked off. Set aside the cooked mushrooms.
   
2. P
   ulse the frozen bacon pieces in a food processor to the consistency of ground meat.
   
3. I
   n a large bowl, combine the ground beef, bacon, and cremini mushrooms, and season with salt and pepper. Using your hands, gently combine the ingredients. Be careful not to overwork the meat. Divide the mixture into
   4
   portions (or more, if you’re making sliders), and use your hands to flatten each into ¾-inch-thick patties.
   
4. M
   elt the remaining tablespoon of lard in a cast-iron skillet over medium heat, and fry up the patties in the hot fat, turning once. Regular-sized (
   6
   -ounce) burgers should take about
   3
   minutes per side; slider burgers should take about
   2
   minutes per side. The meat inside should be perfectly pink all the way through, and studded with pretty little pieces of smoky bacon and mushrooms.
   
5. T
   ransfer the patties to a wire rack so that any excess cooking fat can drain off. Wrap each patty in sturdy butter lettuce leaves and serve with tomato slices.
   
6. L
   ooking for an alternative to hamburger buns? Use Roasted Portobello Mushrooms instead. Oh, and don’t forget to load up your burgers with any or all of the suggested toppings above, people.
   

As you peer into your fridge, wondering what to make for dinner, your gaze lands on a carton of eggs and some leftovers: Easy Cauliflower “Rice,” Big-O Bacon Burgers, gravy from your Slow Cooker Chicken. Jackpot—the stars have aligned. Aloha, loco moco.

Loco moco combines hamburger patties, rice, brown gravy, and fried eggs to create a singularly rib-sticking plate of Hawaiian comfort food. Invented in the
1940
s by a Hilo restaurant owner in response to requests from famished teenage customers, loco moco can now be found at virtually every roadside joint on the islands. And with any luck, the Paleo version of this ono grind will soon grace your table, too.