No Wasted Tears (32 page)

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Authors: Sylvia D. Carter

BOOK: No Wasted Tears
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“Welcome home, Cynthia.” Her father took her in his arms, holding her so delicately as if she would break if he squeezed too hard. He pulled back to look at her, trying to remember every detail of his daughter and mother of his
grandchildren.

“I’m sorry, Cynthia. I let so many things get in the way of my love for you, and because of that, I had to watch you grow into a beautiful woman and mother from a distance.” Her parents looked at each
other.

“You were never really alone, Cynthia. You didn’t know it, but your father and I have been your secret angels for all of these years.” Her mother sat in the chair and trembled slightly from nervous energy. Reaching out, she pulled both of the twins down with
her.

It was Cynthia’s turn to be surprised. She turned her head to look at her father. There were times when she had her suspicions about some of the favor she received. How could she have forgotten that her parents had a wealth of resources around them? Cynthia’s eyes danced at this, but when she looked at her mother’s face, she had no misgivings. She knew all of the coincidences couldn’t have been accidental; and they had been arranged by her
parents.

Her mother spoke first after that revelation. “I’m proud of you, Cynthia. We regretted our decision the moment we hung up the phone. I wanted my daughter back home with me. But we foolishly thought it would ruin our reputation. The firm had just begun to gain national attention. We were winning more cases…but everything changed after that phone call. I cried myself to sleep every night until your father made the decision that, without you, our lives were empty.” Gwendolyn looked at the
twins.

“What your mother is trying to say is that she demanded I do something.” They both nodded with appreciative
smiles.

Cynthia smiled gratefully at her
parents.

“Thank you for sharing all of this with me because I realize you didn’t have to,” Cynthia said with a welcoming lift to her voice. She realized how difficult it must have been for her mother to defend her at the cost of her father’s success. The decision had been made, and now they all had to move forward, hopefully for the better. They would, as long as God ordered all of their steps. She looked at both them, her eyes taking in every detail. With the smiles she received from each of them, she no longer felt the tense air that had been in the room when she entered it. Now, it had slices cut in it that allowed a flowing breeze to pass
through.

“Mother,” Cynthia went to her mother, hugging her, “I do love you
both.”

“I know. We both know.” Gwendolyn hugged Cynthia
back.

Edward joined them, whispering, “But it’s good to hear you say
it.”

“Now we want to know everything about you and the boys,” her mother
stated.

“Why don’t we go in and eat first?” Her father was by her side, and she hadn’t seen him move. Cynthia was so relieved. Without knowing she was doing it, she reached out to grab her father’s hand. The twins were holding their grandmother’s hands, both talking at once, telling her about their
school.

They moved to the dining room where Cynthia was sure their interrogation would continue. She suspected her mother was holding back on asking about Marvin, but she was sure it would come up when dinner was over. The dinner was served family style. Miss Betty brought all of the bowls, platters, and servers to the table. Bowls were passed around the table, and each person served themselves. Miss Betty assisted the twins. The smells about the room caused her stomach to
rumble.

Betty had cooked steaks that were thick, tender, and juicy. A variety of vegetables shared spaces in beautifully crafted antique china, creating a colorful palate against the beautiful embroidered
tablecloth.

The twins were actively talking about their lives and telling stories from school. Laughter seemed to be the word of the day. Finally, the meal came to an end. Her parents got around to questioning
her.

“So, Cynthia, what are your plans?” her father repeated the question asked by her mother
earlier.

Cynthia had relaxed, but with the question, she knew she was center stage. “Dad, why don’t you and Mom tell me what you know so I can fill in the parts you don’t know,” she responded, waiting for either of them to say
something.

Her father shrugged. “Fair,” he said, folding his hand on the table. “According to what we’ve
gathered…”

She looked at her mother. Her face was unreadable, but she knew it was her father who had this information given to him. He’d had her investigated and had not told
her.

“You came to back to Charleston and lived next door to a woman by the name of Sara, who you currently live with, as well as her niece, Destiny.” Her father was laying out her life. It sounded strange to have it related so concisely, as if she were a prisoner about to be
sentenced.

A hush fell over the room when his voice faded. Both sets of eyes were on her. Miss Betty excused the boys, mentioning taking them to see the grounds around the house. Cynthia knew this meant it was time to tell her
story.

“I went to Clemson, found out I was pregnant, and my life entered what seemed like the twilight zone. Saltine crackers became my best friend. It didn’t take long for me to be the topic of most discussions in the dorm. Dad had given me enough money so I was able to get an apartment off
campus…”

Looking at her parents, Cynthia began to ring her hands. “After the first six months of pregnancy, I met a girl named Crystal in my econ class. She was a great friend. Her family kind of adopted me. After I had the babies, it was her parents who allowed me to live in their vacation home in Charleston. They also hired a nanny to help me with the babies. Without their help, I’m sure I would never have made it. Eventually, things got easier. I got some scholarship money to attend college and keep the bills paid. I went to school at night, and the boys were in daycare until I met my neighbor Miss
Sara.”

She watched both of the faces around her. Her mother smiled, giving her courage. Her father winked at her over his cup of
coffee.

“I got so many scholarships…” She related the story of how she discovered monies she never knew about. “The twins and I lived meager
lives, but that was because I didn’t want to waste the money given to me by the
college.”

“They never told you where the money came from because we asked them not to tell you. I thought that if you knew, you would refuse it,” her mother stated. Cynthia shook her head. Her mother was as beautiful as the fashion model Shelia Johnson. But the look on her face was one of regret and sorrow. “Why didn’t you come to us, Cynthia?” her father
asked.

“After you both said how I was no longer your daughter because I wouldn’t have the abortion, I just shut that door. After losing Marvin and losing both of you, my baby was all I had. It was not
until…”

“You were five months when you knew you were carrying twins…” her mother
finished.

Shock registered in Cynthia’s face as she looked at both of her parents. She couldn’t believe what she was hearing. Excusing herself, her mother left the room, returning with two large baby blue photo albums. She handed both of them to Cynthia. Taking the photo albums, Cynthia rubbed her hands over the silk covers. One had Jonathan’s name and the other had David’s name. Their pictures were on the front. She began to quickly flip through the photo albums. The pictures seemed to have been put in with so much care and love. She went back to the front of the first book, opening up the first page. She chuckled when she saw her two smiling little babies. Each picture meant something to her. There were pictures of them in the hospital, their first birthday, and each of their first steps. She couldn’t believe her eyes. Her sons’ lives were chronicled in these photo albums. Their investigator had gotten all of her negatives; these albums were the proof of
it.

Cynthia blinked away the sudden mist of tears that threatened to overtake her eyes. She smiled at her parents. They had wanted her in their lives all of the time. She began to tell them about each of the pictures as she turned the pages to their individual books. Her sons had her parents love all of their lives, even if they were not aware of it. They were able to attend a preschool at the Charleston Academy, and now she knew it was courtesy of her parents. Her parents had orchestrated the scholarships that she had received. The money was enough to take care of all of the twins’ needs. They were gifts Cynthia couldn’t refuse, as much as it had irked her pride and independence. But she had learned the hard way that as a mom, she had to make decisions based on Jonathan’s and David’s well-being.

When she left home for college, she was on top of the world. When she discovered that the reason for her weight gain was not the freshmen ten but a set of twins, she’d been shocked and totally unprepared. Now she couldn’t imagine life without them. Just like she could no longer imagine a life away from her parents, Marvin, or
Seattle.

Cynthia told her parents the story of her lost years—a clean, sanitized retelling of her life that left out the ugly parts, the depression, and the tears in the midnight, the insults thrown at her by people she didn’t even know, and the sleepless
nights.

“Life was tough,” she said as calmly as she could. “Some days I thought I’d have to resort to making negative decisions that could have destroyed my life and the twins’ lives. But God had another plan. All of my decisions were based on the twins’ safety and well-being.”

“You were a better person than your mother and I,” her father said, reaching out to take her hand as she continued to
talk.

“I worked and went to school around the twins’ schedule. I never wanted them to go to a day care center. Children are vulnerable. People
think—”

“I know what people think,” Gwendolyn interjected. “I also know that sometimes people don’t think. For you to struggle because your father and I accused you of ruining your life was not fair to you or the twins, and we were awful to
Marvin.”

Cynthia felt her cold heart begin to thaw even more at those words. Her mother’s tone was indignantly protective. It reminded her of all the times her parents took up for her when she was being mistreated as a
child.

“What about your relationship with Marvin? Who broke it off? You?”

Cynthia
nodded.

“Why?” Her mother narrowed her eyes. The light from the window cast strong shadows, so her face was not easily read. “Because he wouldn’t listen to reason, and he was so stubborn back
then?”

Cynthia laughed in spite of
herself.

“It was a terrible time,” Cynthia explained. “Both of our emotions ran very high on all issues. I wanted to try, and for a while I even considered telling him I was pregnant to see if we could get past it. But I guess that, deep inside, I couldn’t forgive him for believing that he couldn’t trust me. I knew what that
meant.”

“What did it mean?” her father
asked.

“It meant he thought we were…” She wasn’t sure how not to make it sound like a stereotypical case of class envy. “He thought we were rich and powerful, not just in income, but he saw our value system differently from his
parents.”

Her comment was followed by a small silence, but somehow she didn’t feel she’d offended her parents. Her father tapped his fingers lightly on the dining room table. After a few seconds, she turned her head to gaze through the
window.

As the sunset deepened, the landscape lights had blazed on. They could clearly see David and Jonathan, who had run ahead of Betty to the edge of the lawn and were throwing rocks into the lake. If they were concerned about their mother, it didn’t show. They were enjoying
themselves.

Finally, with a sigh, Edward turned back to
Cynthia.

“Men can be very stupid,” he said. “But they do sometimes learn from their mistakes. I did. What I did to both of you all those years ago was wrong. Have you considered the possibility that Marvin has learned from his as
well?”

“I know he has. We’ve seen each other often since I’ve been back. But before I make any major decisions, it was important that I talked to both of
you.”

Gwendolyn nodded. I…probably shouldn’t say this, but it’s fairly clear you still love him, even to
me.”

Cynthia flushed. She opened her mouth to deny it but closed it again. What was the use? She’d already learned that her mother was almost preternaturally astute when it came to reading people. It was one of her many assets as a
lawyer.

“Yes, Mother, you’re right,” she said. “I want us to be a
family.”

“I wonder.” Gwendolyn folded her hands in her lap. “Years ago, my husband did a very stupid thing. It was even worse than what Marvin did in not trusting you. The woman he loved left him because of it, and she didn’t merely break his heart she took it with her. He couldn’t breathe or laugh. It was not until he made a promise to take care of his only daughter and her children in Charleston, South Carolina, that his wife returned home to
him.”

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