No One to Trust (15 page)

“Besides doing the dishes?”

“I realize you don’t like to get your valuable hands chapped, but someone’s got to do the day-to-day drudgery. I have to save myself for bigger things.”

“Knock it off, Galen.”

The flippancy dropped from Galen like a discarded shirt. “I want you to work out with Elena.”

“What?”

“I want you to spar with her. Hand-to-hand.”

Judd glanced at Elena sleeping in the hammock. “No way.”

“She needs it.”

“You mean you want me to teach her some moves?”

“No, she might be able to teach you a few. She just needs the practice.”

Judd’s brows lifted skeptically. “She’s a woman. I have a problem with beating up women.”

“Give her a chance. She might surprise you.”

“You were in the Special Forces too. And you’ve done a hell of a lot more hand-to-hand than I have in the last few years. You do it.”

“That’s not an option.”

“Why not?”

He didn’t speak for a moment. “Because she’d know right away that I want to get my hands on her in a different way.”

“Oh.”

“So will you do it?”

He shook his head. “I’m not used to holding back. I could kill her.”

Galen looked back at Elena. It was clear she was in a deep sleep.…

What the hell. “Do you have your switchblade on you?”

Judd stared at him with narrowed eyes. “What are you up to?”

“Just a little test. Do you?”

“In my pocket.”

“Take it out, but don’t spring the blade yet.”

Judd took the knife out of his jeans. “What now?”

“Put your arm around my neck from behind.”

Judd locked Galen’s neck from behind. “This is dangerous,” he murmured. “I’ve got a lot of smothered resentment for all those dishes I’ve been washing.”

“Now release the switchblade.”

The sound was a smooth metallic
click
. “Why? Do you want a shave? That’s not—”

Galen pushed him aside, whirled, and held up his arm to ward off the attack.

Elena’s hand was coming down on the back of Judd’s neck.

Galen grabbed her wrist. “Hold it. It’s okay. Just a demonstration.”

Elena started to struggle and then stopped. “The hell it was.” Her eyes were dazed and she shook her head to clear it.

“She was asleep.” Judd was staring thoughtfully at Elena. “Sound asleep.”

“Until she heard something unfamiliar and then caught sight of you holding me in a headlock. Battle instinct. We’ve both seen soldiers dead to the world respond automatically when an enemy comes near.” He released Elena and stepped back. “She was fast, wasn’t she?”

“And you were stupid,” Elena said coldly. “I could have killed Morgan.”

“If I hadn’t been expecting you.” He turned to Judd. “That
was a shuto blow aimed at the back of the neck. If it had landed, you’d have been permanently crippled or dead. Are you still worried about hurting her?”

“Hell no.” He snapped his switchblade shut and jammed it into his pocket. “Let her look out for herself.”

“Who said I didn’t?” Elena glared at Galen. “What’s happening here, dammit?”

“You evidently impressed Judd as being too gentle to defend your life and limbs. I just gave a little demonstration to show him he wouldn’t need to bother his conscience about it. You’ll do it, Judd?”

He nodded slowly. “In the gym tomorrow morning?”

“Late afternoon. Barry takes his nap then,” Galen said. “And not the gym. The barn.”

“You’ve got it.” Judd moved toward the house. “But I only do those damn dishes every other night.”

“If you insist. But be careful, I’d take it badly if you accidentally killed her.”

“You can’t have it both ways.”

“Sure I can.”

“Will you talk to me?” Elena said to Galen through her teeth as Morgan disappeared into the house. “What’s all this about?”

“You need hand-to-hand practice. Judd has graciously agreed to act as your sparring partner. You’ll find he’s very good.”

“And what if I don’t want his help?”

“Then I went to the trouble of getting you two together for nothing. I hate it when a plan doesn’t come together.”

“And I hate it when someone makes plans without consulting me.”

“Don’t you need the practice?”

“Yes.”

“And wouldn’t it be foolish not to take advantage of a willing and able partner?” She scowled at him.

“And why wouldn’t I assume you’d do anything necessary to get ready for Chavez?”

“You could have asked me.”

“I wasn’t sure I could get Judd to cooperate. Then I would have had to disappoint you.”

“I’ve been disappointed before.”

“I know.” He met her gaze. “And it makes me sad. I didn’t want to be the one to do it again.” He started for the porch steps. “Are you going to use Judd?”

“Yes.” She grimaced. “But you’re the one I should have chopped. If you’re looking for a problem to solve, go look somewhere else.”

“But you’re such great material.” His dark eyes were twinkling as he glanced over his shoulder while opening the screen door. “And I should call your attention to the fact that you didn’t chop me. You did your damnedest to save my neck. Does that mean you’re growing fond of me?”

“It means I was half asleep.”

“Crushed again. Oh, well, better my ego than my larynx.” He disappeared into the house.

She gazed after him with exasperation. He should have consulted with her. It was true that he’d done her a favor enlisting Morgan to spar with her, but that didn’t mean he had a right to assume control. He was bulldozing ahead, providing what he thought she needed, manipulating the people around him.

But it hadn’t been bulldozing to arrange for her sessions to be in the barn instead of the gym. She was getting less traumatized about that nightmare setting every day, but Galen had realized she wasn’t ready to be thrown into combat in those surroundings. He had displayed an understanding and sensitivity for which she was deeply grateful. What the hell kind of man was he?

She shouldn’t think about him. He was too disturbing both mentally and physically. Lately she had found herself watching him instead of her son during those morning sessions. At first it had been an objective admiration of his quickness and the almost animal grace with which he moved. She wouldn’t lie to herself and claim what she was feeling now was still objective. The heat was too strong to be anything but sex.

She instinctively shied away from the thought. Not with Galen. Not with anyone. She couldn’t face it. Accept what Galen offered and don’t get involved. Don’t ever let yourself willingly do what Chavez made you do. Run away, keep up your guard.…

Run away?

She stiffened as she realized what she was thinking.

Good God.

“You’re all sweaty,” Barry said. “And you’ve got straw in your hair. Have you been playing in the barn with Judd again?”

“Yes.” She brushed a kiss on his forehead. “What have you been doing?”

“Galen went into town and bought me a keyboard. Dominic says it will work just like the piano I had at home.”

“That will be fun for you.”

“Can I come and watch you next time you’re in the barn?”

“I don’t think so.”

“I let you watch me in the gym.”

Barry would be frightened silly if he saw those workouts. Judd Morgan was good, innovative, and totally ruthless, and her response was equally unrestrained. It had been a valuable eight days and she felt almost at her old level of competence. “Sometimes grown-up games can be kind of scary.”

“But you told me I had to face scary stuff, and most of the time that made it go away. Remember when I thought there was a monster under my bed? We got down and looked.”

“Maybe after a few more sessions I’ll let you come.” She changed the subject. “Will you play me ‘Yankee Doodle’ after I get out of the shower?”

He shook his head. “I have to practice. I forget.…” He frowned. “It seems like a long time since we left Tomaco, doesn’t it?”

She nodded. “A lot of things have happened.” She headed for the shower. “I’ll be out in ten minutes and you can show me that keyboard.”

“Okay.” His reply was abstracted. “If it’s a scary game, why do you play it?”

“It only seems scary.”

“Then let me come and watch.”

Good heavens, he was being stubborn. Or maybe it wasn’t stubbornness, she thought suddenly. “Are you worried about me, Barry?”

“You shouldn’t do stuff that could hurt you.”

“And you’re trying to protect me?”

“I just want to go with you.”

She strode across the room and cupped his face in her hands. “Nothing is going to happen to me, love. There’s no monster that could hurt me in that barn. There’s only me and Judd and a haystack.”

“You had a cut on your arm yesterday.”

She hadn’t thought he’d noticed. “It was a scratch. You get scratches all the time.”

His eyes were glittering with unshed tears. “But I don’t want you to get them. Ever.”

She hugged him close. “I can’t promise you I won’t be hurt, just like you can’t promise me you won’t fall off that corral fence you were climbing this morning.” She paused, searching for words. “We try to take care of ourselves, but things happen. Then we have to get up and dust ourselves off and try again. Otherwise we’d never know what it is to get to the top of the fence. Didn’t it make you feel good when you did that?”

He nodded. “I could see clear to the mountains.”

“I didn’t stop you from climbing that fence, did I?”

“No.”

“Because I didn’t want you to be scared of it.”

A sudden smile illuminated his face. “You wanted me to look under the bed.”

She smiled in return. “You’ve got it. And you didn’t find any monsters ready to knock you off that fence, did you? Well, I have fences of my own to climb, and I can’t be scared or I’ll never get to the top.”

He was silent a moment. “You stood by the fence while I climbed it. Maybe I could go along in case you needed help.”

“Maybe.” She laughed. “I’m pretty good at climbing fences these days, but I can always use a little help.” She gently pushed him away from her. “We’ll see, Barry. Now go and find Dominic. I have to shower.”

He ran toward the door and looked over his shoulder with an impish grin. “Yes, you do.” He wrinkled his nose. “Phew.”

She was still smiling as she turned on the shower. He was changing, growing more independent and responsible every day. Galen’s influence? Possibly. Or maybe it was the result of the events of the last few weeks. She was just lucky that they had not made him timid as she’d first been afraid they would. Fear could be a terrible thing.

But you told me I had to face scary stuff, and most of the time that made it go away
.

Her smile faded. Easy words to say, not easy words to live by. Yet she believed those words or she wouldn’t have spoken them.

I have fences of my own to climb, and I can’t be scared or I’ll never get to the top
.

She was scared. Chavez had damaged her confidence and ripped and scarred her.

Time hadn’t healed her yet.

It had already been six years. How much longer would she have to wait for some miraculous transformation to take place? It wasn’t her nature to sit back and take no action once she realized a problem existed.

She closed her eyes and let the warm water pour over her. She didn’t want to take action. Not this time.

Not this way.

Galen was sitting on the couch in the living room, reading, when she came into the room. He glanced up from his book. “I thought you’d gone to bed. Something wrong?”

“Yes. Can we go out on the porch?”

“Sure.” He rose to his feet. “The kid okay?”

“Barry’s fine.” She moved toward the front door. The moon was shining, but it was better than the bright lights in here. What a coward she was being, she thought in disgust. It wasn’t as if—

“What do you want?” Galen said from behind her.

“You’re a problem-solver.” She moistened her lips. “I have a problem.”

“So?”

“I want you to screw me.”

There was no sound for a full minute. “I beg your pardon?”

“You heard me.”

“Turn around. I want to see something apart from the back of your head.”