No Attachments (6 page)

"
I bought this trailer because that's all the money I had. I wanted something that was ours. No one will ever be able to take this from us. We will never be without a home again," she'd told me with steel in her voice. At that moment, I hated my lying sack of shit father more than anything. He took away the one thing that meant the most to her. I swore at that moment I would one day buy her a house just like the one she had lost. That day never came. She died three weeks before my twenty-third birthday. Not long after Jessica had torn my world to shreds. Within days, I had lost the two women I had loved—one from betrayal and the other from the irresponsible teenager who decided to run a red light.

I pushed the memories back to the far recess
es of my mind. Now was not the time to get sentimental over memories that were best forgotten. I didn't want to remember how my mom had worked herself to the bone to provide for me, too proud to ever take money from my prick of a father.

By the time I made it to the general store
, my past was locked away in the vault where it belonged. One solitary car sat forlorn in the dusty lot when I reached the store. I recognized it instantly as the one that had been parked in front of Ashton's cottage when I dropped her off the night before. Pushing the door open, I convinced myself that seeing her one last time would give me the closure I needed before reporting her whereabouts.

Of course
, the little head took over again and rose to the occasion as soon as I laid eyes on Ashton bent over, stacking cans. My eyes traced the rounded curves of her ass and down a pair of perfectly-sculpted legs. I wanted nothing more than to put my hands on her hips and pull her flush against the part of me that was hard with arousal. When I left the store fifteen minutes later, I was in physical pain. I couldn't remember a time I'd ever wanted a woman as much as I wanted her. She was every bit, if not more enticing than she'd been the night before. Without the alcohol to loosen her up, she had blushed as red as a sunburn when I had teased her about her memory lapse from the previous evening. I could have stood there all day talking to her, but eventually, what had started as playful banter had escalated to downright lust. Dragging her delicate earlobe into my mouth was almost my undoing, and I had to force myself to walk away from her before I hauled her up in my arms and took what she'd offered so willingly the night before.

I
t took the entire walk back to the hotel for everything she instigated in my body to return to normal. Once my mind was able to focus on something other than what it would feel like sliding into her, I made a decision: Forget my rules this time and make her mine. We would do the deed once and the hunger would be abated. The magnetic pull she had over me would disappear, and I would complete the job I was hired for. I just needed to work her out of my system, then I'd turn her over and she would cease to be my concern after that. I felt more in control once I had the plan worked out in my head, despite the small voice that told me I was full of shit.

Ashton

"Gettin'
pretty friendly with the customers there," Fran teased after Nathan finally strolled out of the store, seemingly unaffected by the fact that I was practically in a liquid state from his actions.

"
I met him last night," I admitted, sure that it wouldn't take her long to connect the dots.

"
I see. Well, honey darling, I'm thinking you two missed the page on one-night stands," she said with laughing eyes as she settled on the stool behind the counter.

"
We didn't even make it to the 'one-night stand' status. I passed out before we could even do the deed, which means that item is still on my list," I complained, placing my elbows on the counter so I could rest my chin on my hands. "I was an idiot to add that to my list."

"You're not an idiot. Y
ou're just someone trying to forget a tough past. I don't condone jumping in bed with a stranger, but I also know that every woman deserves the right to have at least one night where a man loves her right. You deserve that toe-curling experience, honey darling, and judging by the looks of it, Mr. Sexy Voice would be very accommodating in that category."

"
But it's too late for that. I can't have a one-night stand with someone I could bump into the next day. That defeats the whole purpose. Hot sex with no attachments, remember?"

"
Honey, with a man like that, one night wouldn't do you anyway. I saw the way he was looking at you."

"
It's a moot point," I sighed. "I'm not looking for a relationship."

"
I know you're not, sugar, but there's no reason you can't allow yourself to live a little," she said, nudging me toward the stool she had been using. I smiled grimly at her observation. She'd come to know me well in a short period of time and was able to tell I was exhausted without me saying a word.

"
I'm pretty sure someone your age should be telling me I should wait until marriage or something like that," I said dryly as I sank down on the stool.

She snorted loudly.
"Sugar, I've never given the traditional advice. It's probably my words of wisdom that sent my poor Earl to an early grave. That poor dear never knew what was going to come out of my mouth. I drove that boy to insanity with my naughty mouth when he was courting me. His parents nearly stroked out the first time he brought me home. I'm pretty sure his prissy mom told him to drop me immediately before I tainted their family blood. Earl wouldn't hear of it. I had him snagged hook, line and sinker. He proposed three months after our first date and we were married two months after that. He later admitted he couldn't have waited another moment to have me. Turns out, my naughty talking had him in a sexual tizzy the entire time we were dating," she said, chuckling at the memory. "His momma wore black to the wedding."

"
You minx," I teased. She joked about it, but it was obvious she missed her husband greatly even though he'd been gone for fifteen years. I envied their love story, knowing something like that wasn't in my cards.

"
You're no different than me young lady. I saw how that tall drink of handsomeness was looking at you. He looks at you like my Earl used to look at me. You mark my words: He wants you like a condemned man yearns for freedom."

"
Are you giving me permission to have an affair?" I joked, using the duster that was stowed under the counter to dust around where I was sitting, so I was at least being a little productive.

"
I'm telling you, you deserve to live a little," she said, giving me a one-armed hug before heading back to her office in the stockroom.

Contemplating her words, I pulled out my purse
from beneath the cabinet. I rifled through it until I found the sheet of paper I was looking for. I smoothed it out on the counter and read over the long list. There were twenty-seven things listed on the paper, and only fifteen of them were crossed out. I realized I wouldn't be able to finish everything on the list before time ran out. My days in Woodfalls were numbered. Soon I would have to face the music and return to my old life. Maybe Fran was right. The list wasn't written in stone. One item could easily be switched out for another. I gnawed indecisively on my thumb nail for a moment before I finally grabbed a pen out of the cup by the register. With shaking fingers, I crossed out "*One-Night Stand with a Stranger" and wrote in "*Have an Affair with Sexy-Voice Nathan." This was insane. How did I go from "one night" to "affair?" When did I become this bold person? I knew exactly when I became that kind of person, it was the day I learned that life was short and you needed to seize the opportunity to live.

The rest of the afternoon passed quickly as
Fran and I continued to stock the shelves. A steady stream of customers came in, mostly to buy items they'd forgotten in their weekly or monthly grocery shopping trip at the large store by the highway. Each of them would spend a few minutes looking for their items, and then another ten chatting with Fran and me if I was around. It was the way it worked around here. Most of the conversation was gossip, and as fate would have it, I was the main topic. It seemed word had gotten out that I had drunk enough to float a battleship with a complete stranger. Thanks to Joe's big mouth, everyone knew about my disastrous evening. At first, I was mortified that all three thousand residents probably knew that I'd been out flirting with some guy I didn't even know, but by the fourth customer, I reminded myself that this was the reason I moved here. I wanted that small-town feel, the good and the bad. Fran was a godsend throughout the afternoon. When the ribbing got too personal, she'd remind the patrons of any past deeds they weren't too proud of. It seemed like she had dirt on everyone. It was a benefit of being that old and living here as long as she had. She'd seen a lot of people grow from child to adult in this town, and witnessed many things people would now like to forget.

I was still chuckling after she reminded busybody Chrissy Dean about the time she got caught with Michael Ridge
's hand up her skirt during the homecoming dance back in ninety-nine. Chrissy scurried off, mumbling about people having the memory of an elephant.

"
Fran, how do you know all this crap?" I asked, locking the door and flipping the "closed" sign over.

"
Darling, I realized years ago that in a town this size you need to keep track of things. When a scandal arises, everyone suddenly forgets their own past sins. After seeing a couple of the newer residents run off by gossip years ago, I decided to make it my job to remind everyone that no one is perfect. Could you imagine how boring it would be if we were?" she asked, shuddering as she flipped off the light switch, plunging the store into semi-darkness.

"
At your age, shouldn't you be walking the straight and narrow?" I asked, heading out the back door with her. The question was meant to tease, but there was a layer of curiosity beneath it. What happened to us after we died was a nagging question in my head. Even though I knew some would say my curiosity was morbid.

"
Honey, it's too late for me. I figure, either god will give me a free pass for my charming personality, or he'll give me the boot. It's too late to be fixin' things now."

"
Heaven would be lucky to have you," I said loyally, walking down the cobblestone path with her.

"
You know, honey, you don't need to walk me home," she reminded me, the same way she did every night. "My house is less than two hundred yards from the store, not two miles," she added.

"
I like walking you home, so there," I told her, not mentioning the fact that it made me feel better to keep an eye on her while she navigated the uneven path in the dark. I knew it would piss her off if I admitted I was afraid she'd trip or something. I knew how much her independence meant to her.

"
Do you want to stay for dinner?" she asked, opening her front door that was never locked.

"Not tonight.
I think I'm going to hit the sack early."

"
Any big plans tomorrow?"

"
Well, since it's Sunday, and we're closed, I'm going to cross another item off my list. I need to kick it into high gear if I'm going to finish all the items," I said with a slight edge of panic in my voice.

"
You'll do it. Which one are you doing?" she asked, although I could tell she already knew.

"
The fear one," I answered, making busywork of searching for my car keys in my purse.

She clucked her tongue disapprovingly. It was the one item on my list she didn
't approve of. She could handle the one-night stand or her suggestion of an affair, but conquering my fear of heights was a different story.

"
You know I need to do it," I reminded her.

"
There's plenty of ways to conquer that fear without jumping off some damn bridge. I'm sure your twins are all in," she retorted, referring to Tressa and Brittni.

"
Brittni is. Tressa is deathly afraid of heights and claims she has no desire to ever conquer her fear."

"
She's a smart girl."

"
You didn't think that when she pranked your least favorite customer last week," I threw out, finally finding my keys.

"
Well, that's because sometimes that Tressa acts like she's still in high school. Besides, anyone with a brain knows it's not the best idea to wrap a store toilet bowl with Saran Wrap. Most people who use our bathroom really got to go, and having their pee puddled in their shoes is not good. I could not for the life of me figure out why there were wet footprints trailing from the bathroom door."

"
It was gross," I laughed. "But you have to admit it was pretty funny how the minister's wife, Shelly, scurried out of the store thinking she had missed the toilet."

"
That was the only highlight of the whole incident," Fran replied, chuckling along with me. "She's always judging others whenever they look anything less than perfect."

"
Exactly, which is why Tressa hatched the idea."