Authors: Anthony Eaton
While he was applying himself to the task of spreading the white paste, Dreamer Wanji appeared in the doorway.
âWhere'd she go?'
âJust a little way out into the sand.'
âShe hurt?'
âNothing major. Just a bit burnt.'
âI'm right here, you know!' Saria didn't try to hide her annoyance.
âEh?' Dariand and Dreamer Wanji looked at her, genuinely puzzled.
âYou don't have to talk about me as though I don't exist. You could try speaking to me yourself.'
Dariand, sensing her anger, had the sense to stay quiet, but Dreamer Wanji simply shrugged at her.
âYou chose to block yourself off from the Earthmother and to cut yourself out of this town's future, girl. Not me.'
âOnly because you don't trust me.'
âTrust you? You sayin' I ent taught you anything of value?'
âYou only ever tell me what you want me to know.'
âI been around a lot longer than you, girl. What'd you expect? It's us old Dreamers who know which stories are for telling and which ones are for keeping. Not every story should be kept alive, you know? Sometimes you gotta let them die. Sometimes the only way to get things movin' forward is to let the past get forgot.'
âYou should've told me everything.'
âAbout what?'
âAbout me.'
âWe did. Leastways, everything you need to know to keep travelling.'
âYou didn't tell me about Darri.'
Saria was gratified by his startled surprise.
âDarri?'
âYeah. My granmother.' Saria let an edge of sarcasm work its way into her voice. âYou "forgot" to tell me about her.'
âWho's been fillin' your head with crap about that old girl being your grandma, eh?'
âShe told me herself. Out by the well. We were talking.'
âListen, girl, that woman's no more your grandmother than I am, right?'
âThat's not what she says.'
âShe's as mad as a snake. If you've really talked to her, then you'll have worked that out for yourself. She reckons she's got the reaching.'
âWhat if she has?'
âShe hasn't. She's a woman.'
âI've got it.'
âThat's different. You're different. An' don't go callin' yourself a woman yet, girl. You got a long way to go. In any case, just âcause she says she is, still doesn't make it true. She ent your grandmother.'
âThen who is? Jani must have had a mother, right?'
âOf course. Her name was Nourna. Lived out near Mooka with Dreamer Karri and his lot. But she got carried off by Nightpeople just like your mother, right? Just like every fertile woman we've had for most of my lifetime. Only difference with Nourna was that she managed to hide with her baby for a while first, before they caught up with her. Then when she knew they were finally gonna get her, she gave that baby to her friend Darri, an' Darri took Jani off and brought her up in the valley just like Ma Lee did with you. Now Darri's old and her brain is soft, and she remembers things different to how they were, but that doesn't make Jani her daughter, or you her granddaughter, any more than it makes old Ma Lee your mother.'
The old Dreamer's eyes flashed with anger.
âSo I don't want you talkin' with her anymore, right? She's got no right fillin' your head with stuff like this.'
âYou can't tell me who I'm allowed to talk to.'
âYou want to learn things, then you listen to me. If you won't do that, then to Dariand. But don't believe anythin' you hear from anyone else.'
âI'll believe whatever I want.'
âThen you're less smart than I thought you were. You might be able to reach, but that doesn't make you clever.'
The old man turned and stalked from the hut. Saria followed him.
âIf you and Dariand would tell me the truth about things, perhaps I'd believe more of what you say.'
The old man stopped.
âTruth! Nobody here's told you any lies, girl.'
âNobody tells me anything. That's as good as lies. If Dariand had told me about the Shifting, or about reaching and burning people, then I might not have killed Dreamer Baanti.'
âYou gotta learn respect, girl. For your elders, for the Earthmother, and â¦'
âPerhaps if I thought you were being honest with me, that'd be easier.'
âNight spirits, girl! What's gotten into you, eh? Why are you suddenly so convinced that Dariand and I have been lying to you all this time?'
âBecause I know you have. Something's been calling me, through the Earthmother, and the only one who's explained it to me is Darri. So you can talk about respect all you like, but â¦'
She stopped. Dreamer Wanji's eyes had gone wide, his anger forgotten.
âWhat's been calling you, Saria?' His face was a mixture of fear and triumph.
âI ⦠don't know. Darri reckon's it's my mother.'
âJani?' To her surprise, Dreamer Wanji didn't just snort and dismiss the idea. âI s'pose it could be, at that. Why didn't you mention this to me before?'
âYou never asked.'
âDariand?' The nightwalker had followed them outside and was listening intently. âYou knew about this?'
âNope. First I've heard of it .'
Dreamer Wanji stepped back towards Saria and reached for her arm, grasping it firmly as though he was afraid she'd try to flee.
âWhat sort of call? Does it have a voice?'
âIt ⦠No, it's not a voice. Not really. It just sort of fills me up straight out of the ground.'
âCan you tell where it's comin' from?'
âNightwards.'
âHow far?'
âDon't know.'
A look passed between the two men. Dreamer Wanji's reaction puzzled her. For the first time since she'd met him, he seemed to be genuinely at a loss. As if he had no idea what it meant or what to do about it.
âWhat do you reckon?' asked Dariand.
âNot sure.' The old man shrugged. âThere's nothing about it in any of the old stories.'
âPerhaps that's because someone decided this story wasn't worth telling.' The words were out before Saria had time to think about them. She quoted Dreamer Wanji back to himself: âPerhaps somebody decided that the only way to keep travelling was to let go of the past.'
She knew she was being childish, baiting him, but to her surprise he took her comment seriously.
âCould be. Wouldn't be the first time. But I dunno. This seems too ⦠different. Too big an' important for someone to let it slide like that. This call â I never picked it up.'
âI don't think you would. It's too â¦' Saria struggled to find a word to describe it, but couldn't. âIt's directed at me. Nobody else.'
âHow does old Darri know about it, then?'
âShe said she gets it too. But directed at her, not me.'
âHow often you hear it?'
âWhenever. I heard it when I was down that hole in Olympic, and again just before I burnt Dreamer Baanti.'
âWas that the last time?'
âNo. It came last night while I was sitting on the hill outside town.'
âEven though you reckon you ent listenin' to the Earthmother?'
âIt's different. It's not like earthwarmth or anything. It comes through the Earthmother, but that's not what it is. It's too hard to hold back.'
For a long time nobody spoke. Around them, Woormra slumbered through the afternoon heat. Somewhere in the shadows of the huts a couple of insects ticked quietly, and from daywards a brief, hot breeze, little more than a stir of air, lifted the dust and settled it again.
âYou think this changes things, Dreamer?' Dariand kept his voice neutral, but Saria could sense curiosity there.
âDunno. Probably, but â¦' Abruptly he turned his attention back to Saria. âDarri reckon's it's your mum calling the two of you, does she?'
âThat's what she said. She said she felt it too, sometimes.'
âHmm â¦' The old man was lost in thought for a moment. Then he spoke to Dariand. âI gotta think âbout this. Both of you go back inside and get some rest, and I'll talk to you later. In the meantime, Saria, I want you to stay with Dariand, right? No more wandering off. Not even for a little bit.'
âBut â¦' Saria bristled, but the old man cut her off before she had a chance to argue.
âNo! I know you don't think Dariand and I have got any right to order you about. I know you don't reckon you can trust either of us, and I know you don't think we've told you the truth. An' perhaps you're right. But for your own good, you gotta stay with him. Please?'
âWhy?' To her surprise, Dariand asked the question before she had a chance.
âBecause if she is telling the truth;' the old man held up a hand to stop Saria's protest before she had time to give it voice, âand I got no reason to think she âent, then it's possible I've been wrong about everything else. Or perhaps it all fits together somehow. I dunno. That's why I need some time to think. And that's why we gotta keep her outa sight for the moment. If old Darri starts talking and word gets about the Darklands, then â¦' He stopped himself. âJust keep her out of trouble, okay?'
The old man marched offacross the common. Dariand and Saria watched him go.
âCome on,' Dariand said wearily. âLet's get out of this sun.'
Almost as soon as the sun slipped below the horizon, people started to gather on the common. From the door of their hut Saria sat hunkered on the ground watching glumly, the dog by her side. The ever-present earthwarmth pressed up below her and she shifted, strengthening her barriers against it.
âIt's not fair,' she said softly. Dariand, who was busy kindling the dung-fire, heard her.
âIt's what Dreamer Wanji wants.'
âIf they're having a town meeting about me, then I should be allowed to go to it.'
âDreamer Wanji doesn't think people will talk straight if they know you're listening in. This is a big thing he's asking of them.'
âI still don't understand why he wants to tell everyone.'
âWhatever this call thing is, he wants you to answer it. And to do that, it seems that you and I need to keep on travelling nightwards.'
âSo?'
âSo, he can't just let you go off without explaining to the town. You know that.'
âWhy not?'
âIt's about hope, Saria. Everyone in Woormra has chosen to live here for one reason â Dreamer Wanji. He's the one who's kept the Darklands believing, who's kept hope alive. He's the only one who's always believed there'd be a last child to bring about the end of the Darklands. He's never wavered. And that kind of faith rubs off on people. Not just here in Woormra, but right though the Darklands.'
Dariand crossed to the doorway and flopped on the dirt beside her.
âSo if he's gonna send you â the one thing that represents all that hope, the child who we made âem believe was dead all those years ago â if he's gonna send you back out into a desert full of Nightpeople and who knows what else, then he owes them an explanation, eh? He can't just resurrect their hope like that, then tear it all down again.'
Out by the well, most of Woormra had now gathered. The massed murmur of their conversations drifted through the evening, a restless buzz that reached Saria and Dariand as little more than indistinct babble. Somebody had lit a fire and people gathered around it, some sitting on the ground, most standing, and the growing flames cast their shadows into a leaping dance behind them. Even from where she sat, Saria could sense a kind of anticipation among the townsfolk.
âIf I'm so important to them, why don't they like me?'
âThey don't understand you, Saria. Even I don't understand you, and I'm . .. I know you better than most. And after what happened with Baanti â¦' He caught himself.
âThey're scared of me?'
âYeah.'
âBut I'd never ⦠I mean, I don't even reach anymore!' Saria leapt to her feet.
âI know that. And so does Dreamer Wanji. But people are hard to convince, Saria. They don't trust that a woman â let alone a girl like you â can reach at all, never mind doing it safely. They don't trust that you won't do to them what you did to Dreamer Baanti, even accidentally.'
âI wouldn't!'
âOf course not. Do you think Dreamer Wanji and I haven't told them that? But telling people something and proving it to them are two different things. Just because they don't understand you, doesn't mean these folk don't still have a lot of hope pinned on you.'
Saria didn't respond. Out by the fire, Dreamer Wanji had appeared and people were settling themselves, most sitting in a couple of rough circles around the old man. When he began speaking, he was too far away and spoke too softly for Saria to hear, no matter how hard she strained her ears.
Beside her the dog stirred, sensing her frustration, and she felt the tentative quest of his mind towards hers as he offered her his superior senses. No doubt he could hear every word clearly.
âNo,' she whispered to him as she pushed his mind back.
âWhat was that?' Dariand shot her a quizzical look.
âNothing. Just thinking out loud.'
Over by the fire, things seemed to be heating up. One of the men standing at the perimeter interrupted Dreamer Wanji, the anger in his voice carrying clearly to them, even though his words didn't. A couple of people nodded agreement with whatever he'd said. Somebody else shouted back and tension bristled across the common.
âWhy are they arguing?'
âI imagine there are some who don't want you to leave. Who'd like you to stay here and who'd force you to start reaching again so that you can be Dreamer for Woormra after Dreamer Wanji. Then there'll be a few who still believe in Dreamer Wanji, and reckon you should be allowed to follow this call of yours.
âWhat do you think?'
âMe?'
âYeah.' Saria looked Dariand straight in the eye. âDo you think I should follow it?'
âWhatever you do, it'll be me that Dreamer Wanji sends to keep an eye on you.'
âYou're not answering my question.'
The nightwalker was silent for a long time.
âI don't know,' he finally admitted. âI don't really understand why you won't reach. I don't know what this “call” you talk about is â even Dreamer Wanji doesn't. I don't know if it's a good or a bad thing. For all I know it could be the Nightpeople trying to trick you into giving yourself over to them â¦'
âIt isn't that,' Saria started to explain, but Dariand cut her off.
âI've only got your word for that and even you can't be certain. Nobody knows. All we can do is trust you. And Dreamer Wanji.'
âIs that so hard?'
He didn't answer. Over by the well, things had fallen into an uneasy silence while everyone listened to Dreamer Wanji again. Saria made another half-hearted attempt to hear what was going on, but quickly gave up. The force of her hurt at Dariand's response surprised her. So he didn't trust her. He didn't believe she was right about the call. Why did that seem so unusual? She'd always known it. But still, something about his lack of faith in her stung more deeply than she'd imagined it would.
âI want to believe you, Saria. I really do. But nothing's turned out the way it was supposed to. Nothing. So I just don't know.'
For some reason Gan's words came back to her:
Whatever happens, you're gonna stir things up around here, an' that'll be a story to tell
Was that all she'd done? Stir things up. Destroy people's hopes and dreams and upset their lives and all for nothing? Was that why Dariand didn't believe in her either?
âWhat should I do, then?'
âEh?'
âWhat should I do? What if Ma Lee was right? What if I'm nothing more than a fluke? If me being born clean was just blind luck and everyone's getting all worked up for nothing? What if this "call'' is just my imagination? Where does that leave me?
'
Sudden anger swept over her.
âYou and Dreamer Wanji dragged me away from my valley and from Ma. You told me I've got this big destiny and all this hope is resting on me and that I'm going to be the one to start building a new world. And now you say you're not sure if you believe any of it anymore? Well, what am I supposed to do? Just go back to Ma? I can't even do that now, can I? Because half the Darklands knows about me and there'll always be another Dreamer Baanti, or Slander or one of that mob looking for me. But I can't stay here where nobody trusts me, either. Can I? No, not even you!' She didn't give him a chance to protest. âI've got nothing left. I'm not going to reach anymore, because I'm too scared. And I can't leave. I just don't know â¦'
Saria took a couple of half steps out into the common as if to run, but was stopped by Dariand's voice behind her
âSaria! Wait!'
She spun back to face him, her anger unabated.
âWhat?'
Dariand didn't say anything as he rose and stepped towards her. He lifted his hands and for an instant she thought he was going to seize her and stop her running off again, but before she could react he grabbed her in a tight hug.
She froze, stunned.
âIt'll be alright.' His voice was low, a disembodied whisper in her ear. âWhatever happens, it'll be alright. I give you my word. I'll make sure of it.'
Suddenly she was aware of him, of the warmth of the arms around her, of the thudding of her own heart in her chest, of the strength of his hug. There was safety in that grasp, and in a sudden, startled moment of clarity she realised she hadn't felt safe, not properly, since leaving the valley. Something inside of her seemed to break, and she half-choked back a sob.
âShh,' Dariand whispered. âIt'll be okay.'
Then, suddenly awkward, he released her and stepped away.
Silence had fallen across the common, and as she struggled to pull her emotions back under control, Saria noticed that the murmur of voices from the fire had stopped completely. She looked up through tears to see every pair of eyes in Woormra staring back at her, the faces of the townspeople a mixture of shock, amusement and, on more than a few faces, fear.
But the one that caught her attention was Dreamer Wanji. Standing by the fire, his eyes were slightly narrowed, but other than that his face was a carefully constructed, blank mask.
And that, for some reason, scared her more than any of the others.
In the settling dark, the tableau seemed to hold forever. Then gradually it broke up, not suddenly but in bits and pieces. First a couple of people sniggered, then someone shushed them, which bought an angry retort, and gradually everything seemed to melt away.
A couple of feet away from her, Dariand stood awkwardly, staring at nothing and trying to ignore the questioning glances being thrown his way.
âWhat is it? What's their problem?' Saria asked, but he just shook his head.
âLater. Now's not the time.'
âYou two might as well come over and join us, as long as you're going to carry on like that.' Dreamer Wanji strode over to them and lowered his voice to a hard whisper, directed squarely at Dariand. âWhat was that about?'
âIt was nothing,' Dariand replied, and Saria felt colour rising in her cheeks.
âDidn't look that way to me.' Dreamer Wanji nodded back towards the crowd. âOr to any of them, either.'
For a moment, Dariand looked as though he was going to answer back, but instead he simply stamped over and took up a position on the outskirts of the group without a glance back to see if Saria and the Dreamer were following. Beside Saria, the old man sighed.
âCome on then. We've still got things to discuss.'
He walked back over to the fire, but Saria didn't follow immediately. Instead, she glared at Dariand, who was now pointedly ignoring her.
Nothing,
he'd said. Well, at least she knew where she stood now. She stalked over and stood on the outskirts herself, as far from him as it was possible to stand.
Beside the fire Dreamer Wanji had resumed his position, and gradually the crowd fell silent again.
âNow then, I was telling you all, as I see it there's no reason what Saria's told us should change anything. We always knew that the final child would be the one to end the Darklands. Who's to say that lettin' her follow this call isn't the way that has to happen? We been waiting too long for something like this and we're not gonna turn away from it now. As long as the Earthmother sees fit to keep talking to her â¦'
âNot much good if she ent listening,' somebody shouted from the shadows.
âShe's listening,' Dreamer Wanji shot back at the speaker. âEven if she thinks she isn't.'
It was just like in the hut that afternoon, with Dreamer Wanji and Dariand discussing her as though she was invisible. Saria opened her mouth to shout at the lot of them, to tell them that she damn well wasn't listening, wasn't reaching, and that they could all go to the night spirits, but before she could get a word out, a light hand rested on her arm.
âShh, girl,' Darri whispered. âJust let âem talk their talk. Nothin' you say is gonna make any difference to this lot. Don't worry, you'll find our Jani. Trust me.'
She wasn't sure why, but something in the old woman's voice persuaded Saria to close her mouth again.
The argument went on and on. Dariand had been right, there were definitely two camps, those who wanted Saria to follow the call nightwards to the Darkedge, and those who didn't. The one thing both had in common was that neither seemed to care one bit about what Saria either thought or wanted. The longer she listened, the harder it became to stay quiet.
â⦠and if she won't even do reaching for us, then why should we trust her to even follow that call, eh? Who's to say she won't just run off and get caught by that Olympic mob again? And perhaps that wouldn't be a bad thing, either. At least they'd make her â¦
âDreamer Wanji!'
The shout came from the darkness and suddenly people were pouring into the common from between the huts. Armed with sticks and clubs, they came from every direction. There were yells as a couple of stones flew from the shadows and into the crowd.