Authors: Mike Sherer
hanging! out! with! the! ‘girls,’! ogling! all! the! pretty! boys! in! here!
tonight.”!
!
“Good!show?”!!
!
“Mah6velous,!darling.!I’m!doing!Carol!Channing!these!days.!
You!need!to!come!see!it.”!
!
“Sounds!like!fun.!Chance,!I!need!to!ask!a!huge!favor.”!
!
“You!want!me!to!take!your!route!tonight?”!
!
“A!couple!of!nights,!actually.!Something!came!up,!and!I’m!
going!out!of!town!for!the!weekend.!Would!you!mind?”!
!
“For!you,!doll,!anything.!Hope!you!got!a!hot!date.”!
!
“Something!like!that.!
!
“Come!by!when!you!get!back.!Peter!and!I!want!to!hear!all!
the!juicy!details.”!
!
“You’re!a!lifesaver,!Chance.”!I!meant!it!literally.!
!
Next!I!called!Jeri’s!office!number!at!the!support!group!and!
left! a! long! detailed! message! asking! her! if! she’d! help! find!
someone!to!fill!in!for!me!at!the!restaurant!for!the!remainder!of!
the!weekend.!Some!of!the!younger!volunteers!who!manned!the!
suicide! hotline! often! were! eager! to! pick! up! some! extra! cash,!
and!they!were!dependable.!As!I!spoke,!Keely!quietly!rose!from!
the!couch!and!disappeared!into!the!bedroom.!
!
I!called!the!restaurant!and!left!a!message!for!Javier!to!tell!
him! the! bad! men! had! come! back,! that! I! would! pay! for! the!
damages,!that!I!was!safe,!but!wouldn’t!be!at!work!for!the!next!
Night&Tide
—Sherer&
126&
few! days! given! the! circumstances.! I! let! him! know! that! I’d!
arranged!for!a!sub!to!take!my!place,!and!to!call!Jeri!if!he!had!
any! concerns.! My! apologies! for! bringing! destruction! to! his!
doorstep! sounded! hollow,! but! then! I! didn’t! know! why! I! was!
being!targeted.!Throwing!a!table!through!Javier’s!front!window!
was!on!me,!but!I!hadn’t!invited!anyone!to!redecorate!the!place!
with!lead.!
!
I!made!one!last!quick!call!before!I!returned!to!the!sofa!and!
poured! another! finger! of! tequila! into! my! glass.! Keely’s! voice!
filtered! through! the! closed! bedroom! door,! loud,! angry,!
punctuated!by!pauses,!the!words!indistinct!save!for!a!snippet!
here!and!there.!!
!
“…!insane?!What!…!
hell
!…!thinking?!…!No!!…!you!better!…!I!
won’t!…”!
!
I! gave! up! trying! to! listen! in! and! sank! back,! exhaustion!
rolling! over! me! as! the! adrenaline! rush! faded! like! an! old!
memory.! A! few! minutes! later! Keely! emerged,! mouth! set! in! a!
grim!line.!
!
“Bad!news?”!I!inclined!my!head!toward!the!door!she’d!just!
come!through.!
!
She! sighed! and! flopped! onto! the! couch.! “A! little! problem!
with!work.”!
!
I!raised!my!wrist.!“Kind!of!late!to!be!calling!work.”!
!
“It’s!afternoon!in!Shanghai.”!!
!
“What!exactly!is!it!you!do?”!
!
“Consultant.”!!
!
That!could!cover!myriad!ills.!“Any!particular!field?”!
!
She! lifted! one! shoulder.! “Several.! It! doesn’t! really! matter.!
Boring! stuff,! mostly.! What! about! you?! Did! you! get! everything!
squared!away?”!
!
“I!think!so.!I!bought!a!little!breathing!room,!I!hope,!until!I!
sort!things!out.”!
Night&Tide
—Sherer&
127&
!
She! reached! for! her! glass! and! took! a! sip,! musing.! “You!
know!the!first!time!I!saw!you,!you!looked!as!if!you!thought!you!
knew!me.”!
!
“You!reminded!me!of!someone.”!
!
Her!eyebrows!arched.!“Wife?!Lover?”!
!
Her! words! had! a! sharper! edge! than! a! blunt! poker! of!
curiosity,!suddenly!chafing!me!like!a!paper!cut.!
!
“Nothing!like!that.”!!
!
The!blond!hair!had!thrown!me!the!first!time!I’d!seen!her,!
the! shaggy! cut! that! had! reminded! me.! Her! features! looked!
nothing! like! Cole,! but! in! the! dim! light! she! suddenly! seemed!
familiar! in! a! way! I! couldn’t! define.! She! did! remind! me! of!
someone;!I!just!couldn’t!think!of!who.!
!
She!tucked!her!chin!in!and!leaned!back.!“Sorry.”!
!
Too! late.! Like! ice! cracking! on! a! pond,! the! paper! cut!
widened! and! rived! inward,! snaking! its! way! toward! the! deep!
chasm!already!carved!out!by!Cole’s!death.!The!reverberations!
set! off! an! avalanche! of! cascading! emotions! left! over! from! the!
storms!of!the!past!week’s!events.!The!temblor!rattled!me!from!
the! inside! out! shaking! me! uncontrollably! until! my! teeth!
chattered.!
!
Keely! frowned! and! tipped! her! head! sideways.! “What’s!
wrong?”!
!
“I! c6can’t! s6stop! shivering.”! I! grabbed! opposite! shoulders!
and!held!on!tight.!
!
She! pushed! herself! up! onto! her! feet! and! hurried! into! the!
bedroom,! returning! with! a! big! duvet.! She! wrapped! it! around!
my! shoulders! and! kneeled! next! to! me,! untied! my! shoes! and!
pulled!them!off.!Then!she!grasped!the!duvet!with!both!hands!
and!tugged!at!me.!
!
“Here,!come!sit!by!the!fire,”!she!said.!“It’ll!help.”!
!
I!slid!onto!the!carpet!and!shuffled!toward!the!flames!on!my!
knees.!She!guided!me!to!a!spot!a!few!feet!away!from!the!hearth,!
plumped!a!cushion!under!my!head!and!straightened!the!duvet!
Night&Tide
—Sherer&
128&
so! it! covered! me,! barely.! My! limbs! trembled! and! my! body!
shook!with!a!palsy!that!left!me!breathless.!I!rolled!onto!my!side!
facing!the!warmth!of!the!fire!and!drew!my!knees!up,!clutching!
the! down! comforter! under! my! chin.! Keely! rubbed! my!
shoulders! through! its! thickness,! trying! to! stimulate! some!
circulation.!!
!
“Are!you!getting!warmer?”!
!
“J6just!can’t!stop!shaking.”!
!
“Are! you! on! something?! Are! these! some! kind! of!
withdrawal!symptoms?”!
!
“N6not!on!drugs,!d6damn!it.”!
!
“Okay.!Just!asking.!I!don’t!need!you!dying!on!me.”!
!
“I’ll! b6be! all! right.! T6too! much! all! at! once.! Don’t! l6l6like!
being!shot!at.”!
!
She!stood!over!me,!her!reflection!in!the!glass!doors!of!the!
fireplace!watching!me!quake!on!the!floor.!She!shrugged!out!of!
the! warm6up! jacket! and! tossed! it! on! the! couch.! I! turned! my!
head!to!look!up!at!her!over!my!shoulder.!She!grasped!the!tank!
top! by! the! hem! and! pulled! it! over! her! head,! exposing! a! flat!
stomach!and!small!breasts!with!rosy!nipples!that!hardened!in!
the!chill!air.!
!
“What!are!you!d6doing?”!
!
“Shut!up.”!!
!
She! pulled! the! pajama! bottoms! down! to! her! knees,! let!
them! fall! around! her! ankles! and! kicked! them! off! to! the! side,!
leaving! her! in! only! a! pink! cotton! thong.! Bending! and! lifting! a!
corner! of! the! duvet,! she! slid! in! behind! me! on! the! carpet,!
wrapping!the!comforter!around!both!of!us.!She!pressed!herself!
into! me! and! wrapped! her! arms! around! my! chest.! Her! fingers!
worked!at!the!buttons!on!my!shirt,!helping!me!shrug!out!of!the!
sleeves,! then! fluttered! down! the! skin! on! my! abdomen! until!
they!reached!the!waistband!of!my!jeans.!She!deftly!unfastened!
the!belt!and!unbuttoned!them.!
Night&Tide
—Sherer&
129&
!
Straining!with!the!effort,!I!concentrated!on!controlling!the!
shakes!long!enough!to!raise!my!hips!off!the!floor!and!help!her!
push!my!pants!down!over!my!rump.!It!was!as!much!as!I!could!
manage!before!the!tremors!shook!me!so!badly!I!couldn’t!hold!
my! arms! and! hands! steady! enough! to! grip! the! fabric.! Keely!
worked! the! pants! down! my! legs! and! pulled! them! free,! then!
snuggled!into!me!and!held!me!so!tightly!it!was!hard!to!draw!a!
breath.!!
!
Gradually,!the!trembling!subsided,!leaving!me!drained!and!
limp.!Keely!lay!still,!silent,!but!I!became!increasingly!aware!of!
her,!of!the!heat!that!came!off!her!skin!in!waves,!radiating!with!
more! intensity! than! the! fire’s! glow! on! my! face.! Suddenly,! her!
touch! ignited! my! skin! as! if! I! was! soaked! in! kerosene,! and! I!
turned! wordlessly! into! her! arms,! into! lips! that! pressed!
themselves! hungrily! against! my! mouth,! the! tip! of! her! tongue!
flicking!against!mine!like!a!foil.!Her!fingers!slid!down!my!body!
and! grasped! me,! guiding! me! to! her! center,! already! hot! and!
slippery!with!ripeness,!the!filmy!patch!of!fabric!pushed!to!one!
side.!
!
We! consumed! each! other.! I! sopped! up! her! heat! and!
passion,! her! touch,! like! desert! sand.! Driven! by! hunger! unlike!
any!I’d!ever!known,!I!became!aware!of!every!movement,!every!
breath,! every! heartbeat.! She! filled! my! senses,! the! scent! and!
taste! and! feel! of! her! becoming! part! of! me,! her! body! and! its!
responses! indistinguishable! from! my! own,! until! I! heard! her!
tiny!staccato!cries!of!
oh!*oh!*oh!
!at!the!same!time!I!went!over!a!
cliff!into!a!freefall!of!pleasure.!
!
I!had!not!been!with!a!woman!since!my!divorce!from!Molly.!
As!Keely!and!I!lay!there,!spent!and!exhausted,!the!fire!quickly!
drying! the! sheen! of! perspiration! that! covered! us! both,! guilt!
poked!its!hooded!head!out!of!a!basket!and!fastened!beady!eyes!
on!me.!But!to!my!surprise,!it!wasn’t!Molly’s!face!I!saw!playing!
the!
pungi
,!it!was!Reyna’s.!Reyna,!the!naval!intelligence!officer!I!
Night&Tide
—Sherer&
130&
never!expected!to!see!again.!Reyna,!who’d!saved!me!then!gone!
back!to!her!life!in!D.C.!My!mind!raced!in!confusion.!
!
Keely! was! fast! asleep! when! I! wriggled! out! of! her! loose!
embrace!more!than!an!hour!later!to!find!my!clothes.!Her!naked!
body! posed! languidly! half! on! and! half! under! the! tangled!
comforter,!a!fistful!clasped!to!her!breast.!I!dressed!quietly!in!a!
corner!of!the!living!room,!retrieved!my!jacket!from!the!chair!in!
the!kitchen,!and!tiptoed!out!the!apartment!door,!easing!it!shut!
behind!me.!
!
Gray! light! on! the! street! in! front! of! the! building! and! the!
sound! of! birds! signaled! the! approaching! dawn.! I! zipped! the!
jacket,! hunched! my! shoulders! against! the! early! morning! chill!
and!waited.!!
Night&Tide
—Sherer&
131&
!
!
Chapter(21(
!! A!cab!glided!quietly!to!the!curb,!one!of!the!newer!hybrids,!
tires! softly! crepitating! on! the! sand! and! grit! collected! in! the!
gutter.!The!driver!rolled!down!the!passenger!window,!leaned!
across!the!seat!and!asked!the!great!existential!question—was!I!
Sanders?!Nodding,!I!climbed!in!back!and!told!him!to!take!me!to!
the!airport.!I!craned!my!neck!for!a!glance!up!at!the!dim!glow!
coming!from!Keely’s!apartment!window,!then!turned!my!face!
and!thoughts!firmly!forward.!
!
Ninety!minutes!later!I!waited!at!a!gate!for!a!6:10!a.m.!flight!
out! of! Sea6Tac,! a! new! overnight! bag! on! the! floor! next! to! me!
packed! with! shirt,! slacks,! socks,! briefs! and! toiletries! freshly!
purchased! from! airport! stores! at! even! bigger! mark6ups! than!
traditional! retail.! The! thought! of! all! the! times! a! time! a! sales!
clerk!had!run!my!card!depleting!my!savings,!made!me!wince,!
but!this!qualified!as!an!emergency.!
!
I’d! simplified! my! life! since! Molly! and! I! had! split,!
discovering! I! could! actually! live! on! what! I! earned! delivering!
papers! and! washing! dishes! as! long! as! I! bought! clothes! at!
Goodwill! and! augmented! my! food! budget! with! meals! at! the!
restaurant.!Some!of!my!asceticism!had!been!necessary;!Molly’d!
gotten!everything!in!the!divorce,!and!I’d!lost!my!well6paid!job!
as! a! public! affairs! consultant! in! a! scandal.! The! rest! was! my!
choice,!a!conscious!effort!to!make!a!smaller!footprint!and!keep!
out!of!the!world’s!way!in!general.!Recently,!I’d!added!a!cushion!
of! financial! safety! to! my! bank! account,! thanks! to! Midge!
Babcock’s!largesse!and!a!grateful!government.!I!still!chose!the!
relative! anonymity! and! quiet! of! the! graveyard! shift.! Trouble!
was,!I!could!run,!but!it!seemed!I!couldn’t!hide!behind!the!black!
cloak!of!night.!!
Night&Tide
—Sherer&
132&
!
Colorful! flotsam! ebbed! and! flowed! through! the! terminal,!
swirling!in!eddies!and!currents!as!travelers!made!their!way!to!
and! from! flights.! The! kaleidoscopic! scene! melded! individuals!
until!they!became!faceless,!indistinguishable,!something!more!
amorphous.! That! elderly! overweight! couple! at! the! ticket!
counter! appeared! the! same! as! the! one! sitting! in! front! of! the!
windows!overlooking!the!tarmac!down!to!the!Hawaiian!shirts!
on! the! gentlemen! and! the! poodle6cut! blue! hair! on! the! ladies.!
The! young! brunette! with! the! stroller! by! the! trashcan!