“What an unbelievable bastard. No wonder you’re so angry.” I looked back and forth between the two men. Neither had anything else to say. “Why doesn’t anyone ever tell Drake no?”
Josiah looked a little uncomfortable, then smiled, as if he was looking for Ryder’s approval. “There’re some plans brewing,” Ryder finally said.
“Oooh?” I shifted, lying across the bed, my hands propping up my chin.
Girls’ night turned into Gossip Night with the Boys. My mind went back to Erin. I’m sure she was having a hell of a time right now, but just the memory of the sound of the belt cracking against her skin still made my stomach turn.
Ryder started. “Well, we’re booking recording space to put together an album—”
“Ryder’s solo album,” Josiah interjected.
My eyes got wide and Ryder smiled, relaxing before he continued. “I’ve been in touch with our old manager, and he’s putting together press and a small tour for next year. We’ll be on a break from Soul Divider, so it’s the right time.”
I clapped my hands together in excitement. Ryder’s voice blew Drake’s away. I always hoped someday this would happen. “This is like, the best news ever.”
“Really?” Ryder looked genuinely surprised.
“Yes! And not because I want you to stick it to Drake. Because I want you to be happy. And I want the world to realize how talented you are.”
“Come here.” Ryder pulled my body over to his, kissing me passionately.
“You know what?” Josiah said a little too loudly. “I’m going to go see what Tommy and Adam are up to. Give you two some alone time.”
If he said anything else, I certainly didn’t hear him.
I needed to feel Ryder, now. I ran my hands up under his shirt as my lips worked down to his neck. I licked along the strong line of his carotid artery, imagining what it would be like to sink in and drink his essence.
Ryder placed his hands on my shoulders, gently pushing me away. I gasped as the shock waves rolled through me.
“What’s wrong?” I asked.
He shook his head, looking down. “You’re curious about the blood, aren’t you?”
“Of course I am.” Not that I wanted to trade my self-respect for sexual gratification, but damn, I wanted to know what this was all about. “Aren’t you?”
“It never ends well, Melanie.” Ryder sighed. “Look at your friend. She’s making a fool of herself, hoping to get a couple of sips of blood. That poor girl from the other night is dead. I’ve seen this happen over and over again since we became vampires. I like you just the way you are.”
“So you don’t trust me?” I pouted.
“Are you proud of every single thing you’ve done when you’ve been drunk?” he asked.
“I’m not an addict.” I got up off the bed, defensive. Once I was up I realized I really didn’t have any place to go, so I paced back and forth. “I just want to see what it’s like.”
This was ridiculous. I shouldn’t be begging anyone to have sex with me, no matter what kind it was. Either they wanted me, or they didn’t. Heart, body, soul. And blood.
“It’s not that easy,” Ryder said.
I rolled my eyes. “I let you sink your fangs into my damn thigh! You don’t think I was scared? You’re a vampire. You could have killed me. But I trusted you. And it was fabulous. You can’t do the same for me? Maybe we aren’t on the same page, Ryder.”
He raked his fingers roughly through his hair, frustrated. “I’m scared, all right? Happy now? I don’t want to fuck things up between us. Being what I am has fucked up everything for me so far. I can’t lose anyone else, Melanie.”
I stopped pacing and glared at him. I wanted to be angry at him, but he just looked so sad. I sighed. “Ryder, there is nothing you can do about what you are. You need to stop being angry about it and accept it.”
“I know.”
“Well, I think it’s time you start. Come on, let’s have some fun tonight.”
He smiled, much to my relief. “You’re not so bad, you know that?”
I smiled back. “I know. So what do you want to do?”
“Let’s check out Tommy’s party. Then take it from there.”
I wanted to scream. I didn’t want to go to some stupid party full of drunken, pathetic, Midwestern groupies. I wanted Ryder’s blood. We had a whole room to ourselves. “Okay.” I forced myself to smile. “But next time, I get to pick out something fun.”
T
homas’s party spilled out into the hallway. The door was wide open, with bodies huddled along the wall leading to the room. Music pulsed loudly and smoke clouded overhead.
Ryder pulled me through the crowd by the hand. It was hard to walk without stumbling over someone. We made it all the way to the table, which had become a makeshift bar. Ryder poured two glasses of whatever it was and handed me one of them.
I intended to down it all at once, but it was stronger than anything I’d ever drank before. The liquid seared my throat on the way down.
“What the hell is this?” I had to shout to be heard.
“Venom.” Ryder winced as he drank his. “Isn’t it awful?”
“Then why are we drinking it?”
“It’s the official drink of the undead. And you wanted me to embrace the new me,” he shouted back at me, smiling as he polished off his Venom. He poured himself another. I grimaced as he topped off my drink as well. I braced myself to keep drinking.
A wrestling match was in progress on one of the beds. Two girls in their underwear rolled around, tangled in the sheets, shrieking with laughter. An enraptured audience surrounded the bed and cheered them on. One of the girls managed to pin the other down on the mattress, and the crowd counted her out.
Once the excitement of the match was over, the onlookers spread out throughout the room, looking for the next thrill. Several of them bumped into me as they passed. Nausea rolled through my body as I swayed, and I had to grab on to Ryder to keep my balance. This Venom stuff made a statement.
Ryder took me holding on his arm as an invitation. He wrapped his arms around me, swaying me gently back and forth, enough to make the room spin in unimaginable directions. His lips met mine, his tongue beginning to explore the inside of my mouth.
I gagged. I couldn’t help it. The Venom had no business in my body. My mouth watered in that sickly way as the bile churned in my belly.
“I need air.” I had to force the words out. I didn’t wait for his reaction before I started to fumble through the room, pushing past anybody that came in my way.
The hallway carpet swirled violently ahead of me, like a cheesy funhouse mirror. I couldn’t tell where I was in relation to our room. I held on to the wall, willing myself not to get sick before I made it outside.
I barely got out the door before I let go. My insides rushed out of me, assaulting the sidewalk and the flower pot by the door. I sunk to my knees, unable to fight the inevitable. My stomach lurched upward repeatedly, even after it was empty.
Tears ran down my cheeks from stress and humiliation. Several partygoers had walked by, gasping at my display. The residue of stomach acid burned my mouth. My whole body shook with hollowness.
“Come on, let me help you get cleaned up.” I didn’t know the voice, but she sounded friendly enough as she lead me back to my feet gently by the arm. I wobbled, and she had to steady me with her free hand. I heard some murmuring in the background but I couldn’t register who or what it was.
“Thank you.” I said, rubbing my hands hard on my face trying to regain my bearings. The parking lot continued to spin, but less violently than before. I turned to see who came to my rescue, and was surprised to find Catelyn, the super fan, holding me up, her friends flanking us.
“Venom?” Catelyn asked without judgment. I nodded. “It’s a beast, huh? Our room is right around the corner. Come wash your face and get something to drink.”
I didn’t have the energy to ask questions or protest. I let Catelyn lead me back to her room. She brought me straight into the bathroom, and closed the door from behind, giving me some privacy.
I looked like hell. My hair had already been fuzzy from the hot tub, and my makeup was melted. It ran down my face in rivulets. My skin was blotchy from the trauma of getting sick. Dark circles framed my tired eyes. Too many things had happened tonight.
After washing my face and gargling with someone’s mouthwash, I headed back out to thank the girls. I hoped to make a quick exit.
“Feeling better?” One of the other girls asked. I didn’t know if I’d been introduced her yet. I had no idea what her name was.
“Yeah. Just tired. Thanks again.” Man, was I tired, now that I thought about it. I just wanted to fall into bed and sleep like the dead. I’d come to the right place, considering my roommates.
“Melanie, wait.” Catelyn stopped me as I turned to leave. “Can you get us into the party?”
I should have known that no good deed went unpaid. I tried not to roll my eyes at her. “I don’t know. I mean, can’t you just walk in?” I wasn’t in the mood for this right now. I couldn’t care less who was partying down the hall. I just needed to lie down.
“Is your last name Vaughn?” She asked, crossing her arms and looking smug.
Crap. “Yeah. Why?”
“You know, people are looking for you. Have you watched the news? They think you killed those people.”
The room started spinning again. I held on to the doorknob for dear life. My knees felt weak. How long before more people caught on? And did something about it?
Please, don’t let me pass out here. I closed my eyes and counted to ten. “Why are you telling me this now, Catelyn?”
She smiled, but it wasn’t friendly. Catelyn didn’t look like someone who was used to having the upper hand, on anyone. I could tell she was relishing the moment. “I think the two of us could work out a little agreement. I mean, we both have a way we want things to happen.”
“What do you want?”
“We want to get closer to the band. Your friend doesn’t like to help us. She doesn’t really care about her reputation, but I can tell you do. So I think you can help us.”
“Fine,” I sighed. I just wanted this night to be over and at this point I didn’t care what I had to do to make it end. “Follow me. Just come into the room when I do. I’m not staying at the party, so once you’re in, you’re on your own.”
“Thank you so much!” one of Catelyn’s nameless friends gushed. “You’re the best.”
Catelyn shot her a look, shrugged at the girl, then smiled at me.
We walked down the hallway in silence. The girls followed me like a subservient harem. I had to look straight ahead; the carpet still made me dizzy. I didn’t think I had any more lunch to lose, and I sure as hell didn’t want to find out.
A few people near the door looked at me funny when I arrived with Catelyn’s crew, but I blew past them in an effort to find Ryder. The room was thick with bodies now, humidity and smoke clung to the ceiling tiles. I had a hard time seeing over the crowd, and the smell of the bodies and spent booze nauseated me all over again. I pushed my way all the way through the deck, which probably had enough people on it to make it collapse. But no Ryder.
“Do you know where he went?” I asked Josiah. His eyes looked red and teary behind his glasses, his skin rosier than I’d ever seen it. He looked like he’d entered another dimension, and I had a few guesses of how he got there.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” His words slurred. I didn’t say anything else to him before I turned away. I climbed up on the mattress to look over the top of the room, not realizing group sex was well underway on the bed.
“Hey, pretty, you want to join in?” one of them asked.
“No thank you.” I put my hand on a stranger’s shoulder for leverage and left the room. Eventually Ryder would come back to our room. I didn’t have the energy to search for him. Chances were I didn’t want to know what he was doing, anyway.
Thankfully, I had the room key in my pocket. It shocked me that I hadn’t lost it over the course of the evening. Our room gave me all the dark and quiet I needed. I stripped off my clothes, dropping them on my way to the bed, and crawled in between the cool sheets, happy to find Ryder there. I rested my head on his chest.
“Hey,” he said, quietly. “Where have you been?”
“I got sick.” Vomiting was so pathetic. I felt small telling him about it.
“I know.” His hand made its way out of the blankets to stroke my hair. He knew just what I needed. “I figured you’d come back here. But when you weren’t here, I worried.”
“I’m sorry.” I nearly cried. The fact he worried about me instead of just going on with the party was almost too much to process.
“I would have come looking for you, but we would have never found each other. So I stayed here, knowing you’d come back.” He kissed my hair.
For a minute, I worried about how bad I must smell, after getting drunk sick. But it obviously didn’t matter. And I was too tired to do anything about it. Ryder was happy to see me and wanted to make me feel better.
It was more than I could have asked for as I drifted into oblivion.