Night Fires (7 page)

“It’s the carnival, Alice. You can’t not go,” Bray said, but I shook my head again and proceeded to make David’s coffee as I slipped Bray’s order through the hatch for Betty to start on.

David smiled and placed a fiver on the counter when I passed him his coffee. “Well, better get on. Staff meeting this morning. I hate them. I swear one day I’ll actually get to know all the names in that place.”

“You need a PA,” Bray suggested. “A pretty blonde PA with long legs and huge…” His eyes shot to me and he grinned, “…eyes.”

Carter and David snorted.

“We’d all like one of those, Harrison.” Carter laughed.

I couldn’t help but stare at him. It was the first time I’d properly seen him laugh. His eyes turned from deep silver to the most vibrant blue, his smile as wide as his strong jaw. His usual stern face completely transformed, leaving in its place a stunning man who caused my heart to stop for a moment.

Noticing me looking at him, he frowned. I swallowed and looked away, thankful when Betty shouted through the hatch for me to serve an order.

“I’m off, guys,” David called as I slid through the gate at the end of the counter and took two breakfasts to two men sitting at the corner table. They wore hi-vis jackets and I knew they weren’t local. Maybe they were the workers that were rebuilding the harbour wall. Their loud laughter and crude language made me wince when I approached them.

“Hey, hey,” the large one greeted me when I placed his plate in front of him. “Food and a hot ass. We’ll come here again.”

I smiled, ignoring his expression as I slid his friend’s bacon and eggs in front of him. “She’s definitely a pretty one, Rob.” He winked at his mate. “What’s your name, sweetie?”

“Alice,” I replied quietly. “Enjoy your meals, gentlemen.”

As I tried to leave, Rob grabbed my wrist. “I’d enjoy it even more if you joined us. I
love
redheads. Always so…
aggressive and lively
. Very fun to have.” The way he said it made me shiver.

I cleared my throat. “Sorry, I’m working. But let me know if you need anything.”

I tried to pull away but he yanked me back and I banged the table with my thigh, knocking their mugs of tea and spilling it over the sides. The smaller one tutted dramatically. “Oh dear, Red. Look what you did. Now you’ll have to refill them.”

I nodded and made a grab for their cups but Rob caught me again and pulled even harder. They both laughed when he held down my head and my boobs dipped into the spilled tea, and then one slapped my arse and I squealed.

I shot upright but I was suddenly crushed between two men. Bray and Carter snatched both men by their throats and dragged them out of the bench.

“Apologise to the lady,” Carter growled as his fingers tightened around Rob’s throat.

“What the fuck?” he hissed, glaring at Carter as though he wanted to kill him. He was struggling under Carter’s hold and I was amazed he managed to keep hold of him so tightly.

“Apologise!” Carter reaffirmed with a snarl. “I won’t ask again.”

“Fuck you, you prick! What are you, her fucking pimp?”

Carter glanced at Bray who nodded stiffly, the expression on his face as hard as Carter’s, and then both men were dragged out of the shop door. I couldn’t do anything but stare in shock.

“Hey, you okay?” Janie asked, appearing by my side and threading her arm around me again when my legs wobbled.

“Yeah.” I nodded after mentally checking myself out. “Yeah, just wounded pride.”

She stared at my tea stained t-shirt. “I have a spare in the back. Go change and take a break. Get yourself together for a minute.”

I took another look out of the front window but the street was still empty. “I’m okay.”

“Go,” she ordered.

A small smile erupted at her mock glare and I saluted her and banged my heels together. “Affirmative, captain.”

She rolled her eyes then gave me a wink. “You sure you’re okay, Alice?”

“I’m fine, honestly.”

She nodded. “We’re women, we’ve dealt with worse.”

I nodded, walking away. “Much worse,” I whispered to myself. Then immediately put those thoughts where they belonged. In the back of my mind with all the other horrific thoughts.

It was almost six when Carter knocked on the door and I let him in. He held up a white carrier bag. “Hope you like Chinese.”

I couldn’t help but stare in shock for a moment. “Uhh, yeah. Thank you.” He shrugged then dropped into one of the kitchen chairs and took out numerous cartons, the smell of the food making my mouth water. “I gathered you wouldn’t have eaten, and I’m starving.”

I snapped myself together and grabbed two plates, and just as I was about to take two beers from the fridge, I swapped them for bottles of water.

“Thank you.” I smiled at him as I tucked into the various dishes he’d piled onto my plate.

He lifted a hand, shovelling a mound of Chow Mein into his mouth. “It’s just food, Alice.”

“I meant about this morning, in Betty’s.”

He snorted. “Wankers.”

I nodded in agreement. “Yeah. Anyway, thank you.”

“Will you stop saying bloody thank you?”

I sighed and shut my mouth, and we continued to eat in silence. The wind had got up and the only sound was it raging around the house but the silence between Carter and me was comfortable, and if I was honest, it was nice to have someone to sit at the table with and share a meal, even if we didn’t talk. Carter was how he was and if I decided to take offence every time he barked something at me then I’d be in a constant state of irritation. I realised it was just how he was - blunt. It wasn’t something done nastily or even meant to insult, he just said it how he saw it.

“So, you rewired this place yourself?” Carter suddenly asked, making me jolt after the bout of complete quiet.

I nodded, sucking in an extra-long noodle. Carter’s eyes dropped to my mouth and I felt my cheeks flush with the attention. I knew I had sauce on my chin and I spent the next thirty seconds inwardly panicking at how to wipe it off without bringing attention to it.

Grabbing a napkin, I placed my fork down. “I’ve done most of the renovations myself. I enjoy it, and it’s therapeutic.”

“Therapeutic,” he mused quietly. “And what would you need therapy for, Alice?” He was mocking me.

“Don’t think no one else has suffered apart from you, Carter.”

His eyes widened at the acid tone in my voice and he rested back into his chair, peering at me with a glint of anger as he placed his cutlery down. “I wasn’t being flippant. I was asking why you feel the need for therapy.” He leaned forwards, resting his crossed arms on the table. “I was asking for something,
anything
, about you. You’re the most closed person I know, and I was just looking for an opening.”

I immediately felt stupid and lowered my eyes. “There’s nothing about me that you need to know.” I was honest. I wasn’t being rude or trying to shut him down. There was just nothing I could tell him that seemed appropriate, especially over Chinese at the dinner table.

Tipping his head sideways, he shook his head as he studied me. “I don’t
need
to know anything.” He leaned even farther forwards. “But maybe I
want
to.”

I held his gaze and swallowed when my throat felt scratchy and thick. “What do you want to know?”

A small smile flicked at his lips. “Tell me something nobody knows.”

Lowering my eyes, I whispered, “It’s my birthday.”

He appeared stunned with that small revelation, staring at me with wide eyes as he leaned back into his chair again. “Why aren’t you celebrating?”

Finally lifting my eyes, I gulped back the lump that had grown from the scratch and stared straight at him. “Because I have no one to celebrate with.”

When he just stared at me, I shrugged. I felt stupid and vulnerable. I’d always hated attention on myself, for more reasons than one, but Carter’s deep stare made my bones tremble.

Once again he leaned over the table and before I could move his fingers touched my jaw and his thumb swept leisurely over my cheekbone. His caress was barely there but I could feel it seep inside me, right down into the core of me, the empty part where my soul should reside, had it not left me a long time ago.

“Nobody?”

I shook my head slowly. “Nobody.”

His gaze became suffocating, like he was boring inside my head to find my secrets, yet I couldn’t look away. He was connecting with me, for some unknown reason, but I could physically feel the warmth trickling through my veins, attempting to reach the cold fibres that had frozen long before.

“Then happy birthday, Alice,” he finally whispered. His fingers remained on my face, the tips gently brushing my skin as his thumb traced a path back and forth over my cheekbone.

“Thank you.” It wasn’t a whisper. It wasn’t even said on a wispy breath, but he heard it and gave me a very small nod.

His smile mesmerised me; it was so soft and gentle but displayed a side to him that I’d never seen before. Sincerity and tenderness; two simple emotions that meant the world to me because they were honest and given wholeheartedly.

We both jumped when my phone rang from where I’d placed it on the worktop earlier.

“I’d better get your sink fixed,” Carter mumbled and I flinched when his chair scraped across the floor tiles in his bid to move quickly.

Grabbing my phone, I frowned at the unknown number. “Hello?”

“Happy birthday, Ali.”

Every muscle in my body locked up and I held on to the table when my knees buckled. “Grant?”

“Hey, sweetheart,” he whispered, his voice full of an emotion I recognised but didn’t want to hear.

My lungs were starting to fail, a wheeze loud in my ears when they attempted to spit out every bit of air I forced inside. “How did you get this number?”

“I missed you,” he answered, disregarding my question.

“Where did you get this number, Grant?” My voice was a squeal, a pitch so high I was sure he didn’t understand me.

“Alice?” Carter came to stand in front of me with a look of worry on his face. “Who is it?”

I shook my head. I couldn’t manage anything else.

“Who’s that?” Grant hissed down the phone. “Alice? I thought we…”

Without thinking, I stabbed at my phone, ending the call. Then dropping it on the floor, fear and panic setting in, I stamped my foot on it over and over until it was a mass of tiny screws, springs, and wires, nothing able to get in or out of the damn thing.

My heart was beating so hard I could see it trying to escape through my chest, my pulse echoing sarcastically in my ears and reminding me I was still alive.

“Sit down,” Carter ordered softly as he directed me over to a chair and gently lowered me into it.

“Shit!” I closed my eyes, trying to force the tears from them into my dry mouth. “Shit.”

“Alice, tell me who it was.”

I took the glass of water Carter offered me but my hands were trembling so hard that he had to hold it to my mouth for me to take a sip.

“Alice, talk to me.”

I looked at him, remembering he was there. “Uhh, just… just an ex.”

He frowned and then very hesitantly took my hand and wrapped it up in the warmth of his own, the chill on my skin felt deep into my bones. “And did that ex ever hurt you?” His question was cautious yet firm.

I shook my head. “No, no. Nothing like that.”

“Then what is it?”

“I can’t…” Vomit curled up my throat and I clamped my hand over my mouth. “I don’t want to remember…” I was talking in riddles and mumbling, my mind trying to stop everything bursting in as it tried to push everything else out. “I can’t face it… I don’t want to… it hurts. It’s all my fault and it hurts. IT HURTS!” I screamed.

“It’s okay.” Carter wrapped his arms around me and huddled me to his chest. “It’s okay, we don’t have to remember. You don’t have to do anything, Alice. Just sink into me and let me take it all for you.”

I clung to him, an overwhelming coil of grief fighting to get out. I’d kept it in for so long and I thought I’d managed to cross the bridge over it and leave it at the bottom of the river it belonged in. But now the river was rising and threatening to overflow the banks and into my heart and mind.

“Don’t let me…” I muttered.

“Shh.” His hand stroked over my hair. Over and over. His touch was so soft that I allowed myself to concentrate on it, to feel it, to focus on it and nothing else.

Just before I drifted into the safety of sleep, I felt myself being lifted and carried. And then nothing but the softness of the mattress and the firm hold of two strong arms surrounding me and keeping me from the horrors of my nightmares.