New World Order (War of the Fae: Book 4) (15 page)

I leaned in towards his chest and inhaled deeply, pulling as much of his essence into my brain as possible.
 
It smelled like home.
 
Not my human home in Florida, and not the Light Fae compound – but
home
home.

“It is so good to see you, Jayne.
 
Who do I thank for bringing you here for this visit?”
 

I could tell already he wasn’t back-to-normal Chase, because this question had way too many words in it to be spoken by my typically, mostly mute friend.

“It’s great to see you, too.
 
And this isn’t a visit.
 
This is an intervention.
 
You’re bringing your sorry daemon ass back home with me.
 
No buts.
 
I can’t leave you with the Dark Fae for another day.”

Chase gave a deep-throated chuckle.
 
“I wish it were that simple.
 
Believe me, there’s nothing I’d like better than to be your next door neighbor again.”

I pulled away from him, looking up from my much shorter stature to stare into his impossibly beautiful blue eyes.
 
“It
is
that simple.
 
Honestly, what’s so complicated about it?
 
I want you there, you want to be there, I’m an elemental, you’re my daemon ... done.
 
Let’s go.”
 
I forced myself completely out of his embrace and started to go, pulling on his arm and walking back towards the Light Fae compound.

He let himself be led for about three steps and then he stopped, grabbing my hand and pulling me back towards him.
 
My heart sank when I realized he was going to fight me on this.
 
I had to figure out what I could say to convince him – or I at least needed to understand what made it so difficult for him to just do what he wanted to do.

I turned back to face him and took a step to close the distance between us.
 
At first I tried to keep the tears at bay, but then I decided,
screw that
.
 
I let them rise up into my eyes and for once, allowed my vulnerability to show.
 
As the first tear tracked down my cheek, I said, “Chase, please.
 
Don’t make me beg.
 
I need you.
 
Do you see Gorm over there?
 
He’s a mere shadow of you.
 
And Scrum means well, but he’s not you.
 
You’re
the only daemon for me.
 
Can’t you see that?”

Chase reached up and put his hand on the side of my face, using his thumb to wipe away the tear that had fallen.
 
His other hand went to my waist.
 
“We will be together again, I promise.
 
It can’t be today, but soon.”

“How soon?” I asked, my voice wavering.

He sighed.
 
“Soon, soon.”

I looked down for a second, trying to control myself, now a mixture of sad and mad.
 
“Why the sigh, Chase?
 
Am I making you angry with my neediness?
 
Cuz, honestly, it’s kinda pissing me off.”

He spoke to me in hushed tones, so no one else would hear what he was saying.
 
“No, don’t be silly.
 
There’s a lot I wish I could tell you right now, that I know might make it easier for you to bear all of this ... but I can’t.
 
There are bigger things at work here – things bigger than
us
, if you know what I mean.”

I squeezed his arm and said in an equally quiet tone, “I know you aren’t who you said you are.
 
I know you’re from the Overworld.”
 
I stared into his eyes to watch his reaction closely.
 
He didn’t falter one iota.

“I knew Gorm would not be able to keep my secrets; and I’m okay with you knowing.
 
I was going to tell you myself eventually.”

“I have so many questions ... ”

“I know.
 
And one day soon, I will answer all of them.
 
But not today.
 
Not now.”

“Why?” I demanded.
 
If I hadn’t been so close to him, I probably would have stomped my foot at the same time; but as it was, I was pressed up against him and would have ended up hurting someone’s toes – his or mine.
 
But I was seriously frustrated and the juvenile foot stomp would have made me feel better.
 
I couldn’t decide whether to beg him at this point or slap him.
 
I had a feeling neither would work though, so I decided to just try and go with the flow.
 
I was
so
not good at that technique.

“Jayne, the fae are on the brink of an epic war.
 
Not just amongst themselves, but with others as well.
 
I have been sent to do what I can to keep terrible things from happening.
 
Once I have finished my work with the Dark Fae, I will come back to you.
 
Dealing with the Light Fae will be my next mission.”

“I guess it was a good thing that Tim pixied your ass, huh?”

“It wasn’t an accident, Jayne.
 
I needed an excuse to get into their compound.
 
It was the fastest, most convincing way to gain entry and put myself at their disposal – and to get their ears to listen to my information.”

I looked at him aghast.
 
“You voluntarily pixied yourself?
 
For me?”

“Yes.
 
For you, for all of faekind.”

“Wow.
 
Are you like Jesus or something?”

Chase frowned at me.
 
“Stop.
 
I am no prophet, I am no savior, and I am no special son of any deity.”

“Well, who exactly are you, Chase?
 
Because this is all just one big fucking mystery to me and it never ceases to piss me off that I can’t get to the bottom of it all.”

Chase smiled.
 
“Life is one big enigma.
 
If you got to the bottom of it before the end of your lifetime, the rest of your life wouldn’t be worth living, now would it?
 
Where’s the excitement in an existence with all the unknowns known?”

I thought about it for a second and said, “Well, I guess I’m okay with mystery, so long as it’s a mystery to everyone else too.
 
But it seems like around here, I’m the only one who has no idea what’s going on.
 
Even Becky’s better informed than I am, which is pretty friggin sad when you think about it, considering she’s a damn wienie water sprite.”

Chase squeezed me while chuckling softly to himself.
 
“Oh, I’ve missed you.
 
I’m so glad you came.
 
But I have to go now.”
 
He pulled away and tried to step back.

I grabbed his arm, keeping him from getting too far away.
 
“Wait!
 
I have to ask you one more thing, before you go.
 
It’s about Tim.”

“Okay.
 
One more thing.”

“Becky said something about you using his son’s blood in your antidote.
 
Is that true?”

“Yes.”
 
Chase’s face showed no other signs I could read, which was uber frustrating.

“He doesn’t know he has a son, you know.”

“No, I’m sure he doesn’t.”

“So how can that be?
 
His wife left him when she was pregnant?”

“Yes.
 
I believe that is what happened.
 
In a manner of speaking.”

“But what kind of horrible awful pixie does that to someone as sweet as Tim?
 
I know he loved her.”

“I cannot speak about the circumstances.
 
However, if Tim should like to know, all he has to do is come to the Dark Fae compound to see Abby.
 
I’m sure she will explain everything.”

I snorted.
 
“Yeah, right.
 
The bitch just left him in the dust.
 
She’s obviously heartless.”

“Or very big-hearted.
 
You never know until you ask for the whole story.”

I narrowed my eyes at him.
 
“I don’t like the games you’re playing, Chase.”

He reached up and rubbed my ear gently, giving me shivers.
 
“I’m not playing games.
 
Just trying to stay out of business that’s not mine to be involved in.”

“That’s not really my style, though.”

He laughed.
 
“I know.
 
That’s one of the things I love about you.”

“There are more?” I asked, slyly, totally ready to be regaled with all the things he loved about me.
 
I’m not afraid to admit I was starved for his affection.

“Later, Jayne.
 
I promise.”

“Fine,” I said, grouchily.
 
I hated not getting my way.
 
“So anyway, I just need to know one more thing and then I’ll let you go ... ”
 
I decided to go for broke – put my heart out there on a platter and let him either pick it up gently and care for it, or smash it into a million, tiny, mushy, bloody pieces.
 
I tried not to sound too lame, but putting my feelings and vulnerability out in front of a guy as big and as important to me as Chase had lameness written all over it by default.
 
“Where do I stand in all this stuff?
 
I mean ... with you ... or whatever ... ” I sounded so pitiful, but I couldn’t help it.
 
I never felt so out there and unprotected as I did at this moment.

“Jayne,” said Chase, pulling me close one more time and talking into my neck as he held me, “you are the reason I’m doing all this.
 
I’m trying to make this a world you can walk in, live in, love in – without fear and without unnecessary pain.
 
Some pain is inevitable and needed ... but not the pain some have in mind for you.
 
Once I have neutralized that threat, I will be with you again, in spirit if nothing else.”

I squeezed him harder.
 
“I hope it doesn’t take too long.
 
And I’m not okay with you just being there in spirit, okay?
 
I want all of you.”

“Me too.”
 
He squeezed me gently back and then pulled away to look in my eyes.
 
“In the meantime, you live your life, do your thing with whoever, and don’t worry about me.
 
I will always be there for you, no matter what decisions you make.”

“What kind of decisions are you talking about?”
 
It kind of sounded like he was giving me permission to mess around with other guys or something, which was weird and made me kind of sad.

“Any.
 
Any kind of decisions.
 
Who you decide to spend your time with, what you do when you’re with those people, where you decide to go, what you decide to believe in.
 
No matter what.
 
I am always going to be there for you – without judgment.”

“Wow.
 
You really are like Jesus.”

He chuckled.
 
“No, I’m really not.
 
I’m nothing like who he is portrayed to be.
 
I’m missing, among many other qualities, the ability to sacrifice myself for all faekind.
 
I am here only for you.”

“Okay, so you’re my own personal messiah then.”

“If you must label it that way to fully appreciate the depth of feeling I have for you, then go ahead.
 
But I’m not perfect and I’m not completely selfless either.”

I looked into his eyes, searching for any signs he was messing with me but I saw none.
 
“I do like the label, Chase.
 
Yes ... I think it suits you.
 
And for now, I’m okay with you running around being a secret diplomat or whatever; but at some point, I’m not going to be happy with the long-distance thing.
 
I could get hurt, you know.
 
If you’re not there to watch my back.”
 

His eyes darkened.
 
“Don’t remind me.
 
I’m doing everything I can to keep that from happening, and trust me, it’s a full-time job.”

“Wow,” I said, a little stunned at that information, “I had no idea I was hated on such a global scale.”

“Not hated.
 
No, that’s not it at all.
 
Desired would be a better word.
 
Lots of fae and others desire to have you so that they can be the beneficiaries of your power.
 
The vast majority of them do not have your best interests at heart, however.”

“Okaaaay then,” I said in a singsong voice, “better hurry up and get back to meeee.
 
So I don’t start hanging out with the wrong croooowwwd ...”