New Life (5 page)

Crap! I was a failure as a big brother.
Saturday?
I replied.

Dad’s birthday.

Oh right. I’d forgotten that too. Chalk up
another fail.
After the party. Late matinee
, I
suggested.

Great.

Goal accomplished, Katie fell silent. But a
few minutes later, another text popped up.
BTW, thanks for
coming to my game.

Mom was right. The kid really did care. It
was simple enough to make Katie happy. I just had to put forth a
little effort.

No prob. You play gud.
Nice to live in
an age of intentional misspellings, because relearning how to read
and write hadn’t been easy for me.

I glanced up to realize the bus had reached
the station near my work. The office building was like a second
home, I spent so much time there. I should quit mentally whining
about a job I was lucky to have. Not many people would hire someone
with both a disability and a DUI record.

I greeted Shelly at reception and headed for
the janitor room. My gaze flicked to the elevator when the doors
opened to spew out men and women in business clothes. Anna wasn’t
among them.

I got to work. As I dusted, I heard the
occasional sound of another person leaving the building until at
last it was quiet. I started the vacuum, cranked up my music, and
was alone in my Fortress of Solitude. As I rolled the vacuum over
industrial carpet in a first-floor conference room, a movement
caught my attention. I flicked off the sweeper and looked up to see
Anna in the doorway. She was as pretty as I’d remembered. I
wondered if her hair was as soft as it looked. I wanted to plunge
my hands in it to find out, and kiss those pouting lips and… Holy
shit, I was hard and hungry for this woman I barely knew.

She raised a hand. “Hi, Jason.”

I pulled my earbuds out. “You’re here
late.”

“Yeah. This is kind of weird, isn’t it? But
something good happened today, and I…I wanted to tell you about
it.” Her cheeks flushed. “Now I feel like a complete idiot.”

Anna feeling like an idiot made
me
feel a lot more confident. “What happened? Tell me about it.” I
rested an arm on the vacuum handle, casually cool.

“I took another crack at court today, and I
did okay. I remembered everything without looking at my notes, made
good eye contact, spoke succinctly.” Her eyes sparkled. “I was damn
good.”

“Congratulations.”

“I don’t mean to brag. I just wanted to tell
somebody who would understand what it meant to me. I didn’t feel
like I could talk to anybody at the office.”

I grinned, glad to be the person she shared
her secret happiness with.

She tucked her hair behind her ear in a
nervous gesture. “I’ve been thinking about you. Working two
different shifts like we do, there was no way to bump into you
accidentally on purpose.”

“You wanted to?”

“Today I finally thought I’d just grow a pair
and come find you. So here I am.”

I was shocked that she’d been thinking of me
like I’d been thinking of her. I wasn’t such a stalker after all.
So how should I answer?
Glad you came
, or maybe
Want to
make out?
I went with, “Good.”

“So… I wondered if you might want to go for
coffee sometime.”

“Sounds good.” I was proud of myself for
sounding calm when inside I was jumping up and down like a kid on
Christmas morning. I didn’t want to let her go with a promise of
some vague date in the future. I wanted to pin her down before she
changed her mind. “I’m usually done here by midnight. Would that be
too late?”

“Um, sure. How about that diner around the
corner. Josie’s?”

“Tonight,” I confirmed. My head was spinning.
I couldn’t believe this was actually happening, especially since it
was playing out almost exactly like some daydreams I’d had. “See
you later, then.”

Anna smiled and turned to go.

I watched her walk away and immediately felt
my confidence ebbing. Would she show? If she did, what would we
talk about? Would I make a fool of myself, stumbling over words or
losing my train of thought? I couldn’t count on being sharp late at
night when I was tired. Plus, I hadn’t been on any dates since
before the accident, so my self-esteem wasn’t at its highest.

Not a date
, I reminded myself as I
turned the vacuum on.
Just friends meeting for coffee
.

Forcing myself to concentrate on my present
actions step by step, I worked through every task. At midnight, I
double-checked to make sure I had my keys, then let myself out of
the building. I glanced down at my faded T-shirt and jeans—not
great for an almost-date but better than a janitor coverall.

I inhaled a breath of the cool night air
tinged with exhaust fumes as I walked past my bus stop and around
the corner to Josie’s. A neon-red Open sign was in the window. My
heart beat faster as I entered the coffee- and grease-scented
diner. Either Anna would be there, or I’d have to sit and wait for
her, wondering if she’d really show. Either prospect was
daunting.

I glimpsed her blonde-streaked hair across
the room just as she raised her hand to beckon me over. I slid into
the seat across from her in the booth.

“Hi,” I said at the same moment she said,
“Long night?”

I shrugged. “The usual. What about you?” My
plan was to keep lobbing the conversation back to her so she’d do
most of the talking.

She smiled. “Well, I got a puppy recently, so
she keeps me pretty busy. She’s not completely house-trained yet,
but I’m working on it. I feel bad about her being cooped up in her
crate almost all day, even though it’s a really large one. But I
can’t trust her in the apartment outside of the cage. I take her to
the dog park for a really long run after I get home. I think I’m
going to have to find her a pet day care so she doesn’t spend so
much time alone. But I really am glad I got her. She’s a
sweetheart.”

Anna blurted her dog story in a way that let
me know she was as nervous as I was. She nodded at the menu in her
hands. “I never got around to eating dinner, so I thought I’d order
a sandwich or maybe an omelet. Are you hungry?”

“Sure.” I’d had a microwave Cup o’ Noodles
not long ago, but if coffee was about to turn into sharing a meal,
I wasn’t going to argue. I grabbed a sticky menu from the stand. I
was so wired I didn’t think I could choke down anything, so when
the waitress came, I ordered a bowl of soup.

“That’s all you’re going to have?” Anna
asked. “I was going to get the tuna casserole. ‘Just like mom used
to make,’ it says. Maybe somebody’s mom, but not mine.”

After the waitress left, it was time to make
small talk. Conversation hadn’t seemed so hard that first night
we’d met. Now I couldn’t think of a thing to say.

Anna picked up her coffee cup and cradled it
in both hands. “Are you from around here?”

“Pickens. A little town south of
Columbus.”

“Is your family still there?”

“Yeah.”

“How’d you happen to move to the city?”

“The therapy center I used to go to after the
accident is here. It made sense to live closer, though I’ve stopped
therapy since I moved. Anyway, I was ready to get out of my
parents’ house. They wanted me to stay at home and work nearby, but
I needed to be on my own.”

How’d we get onto the subject of me when my
plan had been to keep Anna talking about herself?

“Living with your parents, or even visiting
them, can be stressful,” she said.

“Where are yours?”

She set down her cup. “Detroit area.
Bloomfield Hills. Far enough away that I don’t have to see them too
often. Oh, that sounds bad, doesn’t it? I love them, but being
around them is just—”

“Stressful,” I completed.

She laughed. “Exactly. Parents. Ever think
maybe they’re not the problem? Maybe it’s just us, imagining we’re
not living up to their expectations.”

I shook my head. “I’m pretty positive I’m
not
living up to expectations. I was supposed to get a
business degree, then help my dad in our hardware store.” I thought
about Dad’s permanent worry lines because of business being slow
and the second mortgage he and mom had taken on the house in order
to pay my bills.

“Couldn’t you still work there without a
degree?”

Of course I could. That was what Dad
wanted—me by his side, stocking shelves and helping customers. It
was simple enough work that I could do it too, but… “I can’t live
in Pickens.”

Anna nodded. “Everybody knows you there, and
you can’t escape your past.”

I felt a little lift inside because she
understood. “Exactly.”

“How long ago was your accident?”

There it was, the elephant in the room which
could only stay in the corner for so long before it came lumbering
into a conversation.

“About three years. I was pretty messed up at
first, but I relearned everything, more or less.” Time to get back
to more talk about Anna and less about me. “How did you happen to
move to Ohio?”

“I graduated from MSU Law College, passed the
bar, and fielded some offers closer to home. But I chose to join
this firm for a fresh start. Everybody around our area knows the
family name. I wanted to accomplish something on my own, away from
all that.”

She really did get me. We were both escaping
our past. “You like Columbus?”

“I do. The city’s got a lot to offer, and I’m
starting to make some friends.” She smiled. “Occasional meltdowns
and doubts aside, I’m pretty happy with my job.”

“I’d like to see your dog.” The completely
unrelated thought popped into my head and out of my mouth before I
could stop it. That happens sometimes, taking whoever I’m talking
to by surprise. Plus the words sounded sort of suggestive. “I mean,
your new dog sounds cute.”

“She is.” Anna paused, then added, “I could
introduce you to her some time.”

That sounded as if there was hope for a
second date. I took a sip of water to keep from grinning like an
idiot, then answered, “I’d like that.”

The waitress arrived with our food, a welcome
distraction. I was glad I only had a bowl of soup to contend with.
I gripped the spoon carefully so I wouldn’t spill soup down my
chin. Tonight, handling cutlery felt like more than my fine motor
skills could handle.

Anna forked up a bite full of casserole.
“God, I’m starved. I haven’t eaten any real food since this
morning, just some cheese curls from the vending machine. I should
snack on fruit more.”

“I think cheese curls are the base of the
food pyramid,” I teased.

“Hey, they have cheese, so they’re in the
dairy group.” Her smile sparkled, even with a dab of tuna stuck to
her lip. I wanted to lick it off.

I liked how easy she was to talk to, and my
nervousness had eased. “What’s your favorite food?”

“All of it. Can’t you tell from my
figure?”

I swept a look over the portion of her body
visible above the tabletop. I didn’t need to see any more. “Looks
good to me.”

She blushed and dropped her gaze to her
plate. Damn, was I actually flirting? I hadn’t done that since…
Actually, I couldn’t remember ever flirting. That was pre-accident
Jason and I was Jason 2.0. I never felt as if his experiences were
really mine.

“You look really nice in that top,” I added
and hoped she didn’t think I meant because of her boobs. I avoided
staring at them.

“Thank you.” She glanced at me. “And I like
your T-shirt. Local band?”

I’d forgotten what I was wearing, so I looked
down at the graphic and logo: Modern Miracles. “I guess so. I got
it at a thrift store.”

“Have you heard of The Gastonburys? They play
this weird mix of grunge, jazz, and hip-hop. They’re like music
gumbo.”

“Don’t know the name, but I might remember
their music if I’ve heard it before.”

“What do you usually listen to?”

“A little of everything.” I pulled my MP3
player from my backpack and handed it to her.

She rummaged in her purse and offered hers in
exchange. I looked at her current playlist but only knew a few of
the song titles.

“Oh! The Naked Farmers,” Anna exclaimed as
she studied my music library. “They’re good.”

We chatted about music for a while, and Anna
insisted I listen to a particular song on her player. “Unless you
think using other people’s earbuds is too gross.”

“What’s a little ear wax between
friends?”

It sounded funnier in my head than it did
aloud, but Anna laughed anyway. The sound warmed my insides more
than the hot soup. Damn, her flashing dimples and sparkling eyes
floored me. It could’ve been because it was the first female
attention I’d received in a long time, but I don’t believe that’s
all it was. There was a spark in her that ignited me, a brightness
about her that shone into me.

I listened to the song she wanted to share
and smiled. The song sucked, but I couldn’t have cared less.

****

I can pinpoint the exact moment my interest
in Jason moved from basic attraction into something more. As we sat
in the diner that night we went for coffee, he smiled, and a bite
of tuna casserole got stuck in my throat. I gulped it down as I
watched him absorb the music with that quiet air of intensity.

His eyelids lowered as he listened to
White Countess
by the Gastonburys, shielding his eyes so I
could study his face undetected. His features were sharp, sculpted
angles, the kind of strong bone structure that would age
beautifully. My eyes traced the scar from his hairline around the
curve of his eye socket and down to his jaw. The straight line of
his mouth was softened by a slight tilt at the corners, which gave
him a perpetually amused look. I felt an impulse to touch my
fingertip to the deep bow of his upper lip. Instead, I stuck my
fork into the casserole I’d lost interest in.