Never Enough (25 page)

The front door opened and I froze in my room. Halley’s voice was all I could hear until Luke’s dreamy voice filled my ears. He was here and I was so nervous to step out of my room. Why was I so nervous to see him? He was just a guy I’d met last night and just happened to go home with and let him have sex with me. Get yourself together Macy.

I opened my door and decided to face the music. When Luke saw me, an instant smile spread across his face.
It was contagious because I was grinning too. He walked up to me and kissed my cheek. Out of the corner of my eye I could see Halley just grinning away. She’d seen a lot of firsts with me and each one; she seemed happier and happier about.

“You look beautiful.” He whispered in my ear and the butterflies came back. I just smiled and replied with a simple thank you.

“You guys can go ahead and head out. Marcus will be here to get me in a few.” Marcus. I’d forgotten about him. He must have left when Trevor did. I hoped it wouldn’t be awkward for him to see me with his best friend having left town because we were over. Halley shot a look letting me know everything was ok.

Luke grabbed my hand and I
followed him to his car. He opened my door for me and I slid into the passenger side seat. This car was top of the line. Everything in it was high end, I could get used to this. He started the car then leaned over to kiss me. I met him eagerly, his hands briefly touching my waist. “I’m glad you asked me to go with you tonight.”

Trying to gain what composure I had left, I replied, “Me too.”

He pulled up at The Lounge and I took in a deep breath. This was my other home and I’d been away too long. I’d have to face Gary and I was no longer afraid to do that. He’d seen everything and he was bound to know that I would be moving on. I wouldn’t be a hermit forever. A few regulars greeted me the minute I walked in the door. It sure felt good to see some old faces in here. “Look at you; you’re like a celebrity in here.”

I winked and smiled, “Of course I am. I told you my uncle owns this place. You want something to drink?”

“Sure, crown and coke.”

I stepped behind the bar and fixed his drink. He pulled out his wallet and tried to pay me. Shaking my head no, I beckoned him over for a kiss. “You drink on me tonight.” I smiled and he graciously accepted the drink. “Hey give me a minute; I need to talk to my uncle.”

“I’ll be right here.” Those eyes were amazing in this light. Having to walk away from them was suddenly something I didn’t want to do but I know I needed to.

Gary was sitting in the office looking at the computer. Probably playing cards or something, as if he didn’t have a bar to run. He looked up at me as I shut the door. I couldn’t read his expression. I wanted to be able to. He was bound to holler or who knows what he would do. He sat there just watching me, I expected him to speak first but he didn’t.

“Hey Uncle Gary, how are you.”

“I’m good, more importantly, how are you?” He didn’t seem so tense when he answered. I counted my blessings and took that as a good sign.
I felt like I could breathe. Thank god because I felt like I were suffocating.

“I’m actually very good. I’ve never been better. I’m sure you’ve already heard that Trevor left town. If you’re mad at me I’ll understand completely but I would like to come back here. This is my home.”

“I know he left. I didn’t mean to seem like I took his side. I just didn’t want anything going sour with you two and when it did, I tried to do what I thought was best. You will be just fine Macy. You are a strong young woman. I’ve never been more proud of you in my life for standing up for yourself and knowing what you want.” He got up and made his way over to me for a hug. “This bar hasn’t been the same without you here.”

“It’s good to be back. I have a friend here with me tonight. His name is Luke.” Gary eyeballed me for a second. “I just met him last night. He’s very nice and he’s a tattoo artist. Maybe me and you can get tats Gary.”

He burst out laughing so hard I thought he was going to cry. “Yeah, Macy that’s a good one. You must get your sense of humor from me. Enjoy yourself tonight, you know the rules.” I rolled my eyes and stepped out of the office and headed behind the bar. I threw back a shot of whiskey and went to meet Luke. Halley and Marcus were there too. Surprisingly, Marcus seemed to be cool with Luke. Apparently they knew each other from a few of Marcus’ tattoos.

Luke grinned as I walked up and I couldn’t help but return one back. A few more regulars noticed me and walked up asking if I would sing. I hadn’t been on the stage in a while. It was almost like a craving I couldn’t ignore for much longer. Of course I would sing, what was wrong with these people.
Halley and Marcus were making their rounds talking with everyone. I wondered if he were upset that there was no band to play tonight. I squeezed Luke’s hand and whispered in his ear, “I’ll be right back.”

The DJ booth was unoccupied at the time. He must have gone to the restroom. Oh well, I grabbed the book and began flipping through the list. I didn’t want anything sappy. I’d had enough sap here lately and that was not going to be revisited. The DJ came back just as I made my selection. No one could raise my spirits quite like
music from the 80’s and everyone began cheering as a peppy upbeat song came over the speakers. Halley looked at me from the crowd and I waved her onto stage. She ran up and joined me. It felt so incredible to be back on this stage singing karaoke. My eyes scanned the crowd as we sang and when they met Luke’s eyes, it almost reminded me of when Trevor used to watch me sing. That memory got shoved further behind. He was no longer here. Luke met me as I stepped down from the stage, those green eyes sparkling in the light. How lucky was I?

“You are pretty amazing up there. Why don’t you sing with a band or something?” Complements have always come my way for my singing but I’d never given it any further thought. Music was just a major release for me. I loved anything to do with it, I just didn’t know about making a living off of it.

“Oh, I don’t know. I’m content with this for now.”

“The crowd loves you. I’m definitely a fan.”

I smacked his arm playfully and he pulled me in closer. “Are you really?”

He kissed my lips and I already knew my answer.
Gary came walking up and cleared his throat like a father would to his daughter. Laughing, I turned to look at Gary and rolled my eyes in a joking manner. “Luke, this is my Uncle Gary. Gary, this is Luke.” The two men shook hands and began talking like they’d known each other for years. I stood back and smiled. Luke and I barely knew each other but my mind had ease with this. If anything did progress with Luke, we didn’t have to worry about sneaking behind Gary’s back or worrying about what he would think. We would be free to be together and do as we pleased.

I felt a hand on my arm and turned to see Halley beside me. “Looks like the two of them are getting along rather peachy.”

“Sure does right? I know I just met him last night but he is so amazing. I know it’s the new jitters, but I can’t help but grin like a fool when he is around.”

“Aw, come here Mace! I love seeing you happy. More than you know. If you have fun with him, who cares if you just met him last night. Have fun. You’re still young!” She hugged me and we were laughing. “And I swear not to preach if you don’t come home tonight!” I smacked her arm and flipped her off. I sauntered over to the bar and fixed myself a long island ice tea. I took a few sips and made my way back to where Luke and Gary were.

Luke and Gary were still talking. About what who knows? I just know my Uncle was hogging my date for the night. “So I hate to break up this pow wow, but can I still him back Uncle Gary?”

Gary huffed and said something under his breath before replying, “Sure, bring him around anytime I like him.” With that he walked off.

Luke pulled me in for a kiss. The butterflies began fluttering again. I pulled away and grinned, “Well someone else around here likes you too.”

“You like me? I thought he was the only one.”

I took a long sip of my drink and laughed at him. “If I didn’t like you, you wouldn’t be here.”

He pushed me up against the wall and pinned my arms to my sides and nibbled my neck. Oh I wish we weren’t here right now, but instead in a room with a bed and just us. “Is that so?”

“Yes,” I answered rather breathy. Who know someone besides Trevor could make my insides melt completely. I had no problems with this at all.

He dropped my arms and looked in my eyes. I was still trying to catch my breath. I grabbed my drink and took a bigger sip than before trying to not think about taking him right here and now.

There was no band this evening, well all because of me. Halley came around me but Marcus pretty much kept his distance. I know he blamed all this on me. He could blame whoever he wanted. Truth is, I was more than relieved that Trevor wasn’t here to constantly come up crying and begging for forgiveness. I didn’t have to worry about tiptoeing around people’s feelings or wondering whether I was going to randomly begin crying. The DJ let karaoke go on a little longer then played dance music. Halley’s eyes met mine and we both went out to the dance floor. We were both lost in the music grinding our hips to the beat. Neither of us paid any attention when Luke and Marcus both joined us. We also failed to notice there was a sea of people around us dancing. After the song, Marcus pulled Halley off the dance floor. We continued dancing like we were the only two people on the floor.

Luke leaned into my ear and whispered, “I know this is way too soon, but I really like you. I hope we can keep seeing each other.”

I turned to face him and stared into those amazing green eyes. “Are you kidding me? I’d want to see me again too! I’m joking I swear. I really like you too.” I kissed his lips and he leaned in to my ear again.

“What do you say we get out of here?” My heart began pounding. All I could come up with was a simple head nod and he led me off the dance floor and out the door. Halley would have to get a text later; I didn’t see her before we stepped out the door. She said she’d understand if I didn’t come home and tonight was that night.

Chapter
20

He pulled up at his apartment and opened my door for me. We walked back into that clean apartment that I still had to wrap my head around to understand. I excused myself to the bathroom when he handed me a shirt to wear. Walking back to meet him, there was a door open. Being nosy, I poked my head in and saw a whole set of tattoo equipment. I wondered if he would give me a tattoo. Wait scratch that, how would I pay for it? His arms wrapped around my waist and he turned me to him.

“You saw my room? I don’t usually work from home, but I keep extra equipment here just in case.” He moved one hand to turn the light on and show me his work.

There were pictures on the walls of tattoos he’d done. Anything from plain and simple to large and elaborate hung up there. His little personal gallery was way too cool, I stood there in awe just taking it all in. “Wow, Luke these are amazing. You’re really good.”

He gave me a big grin and replied, “Thanks.” His face fell slightly though as he continued, “I used to do it occasionally just for fun, but when my pregnant fiancée died in a car crash two years ago, this was the only way I knew to handle the pain. I threw myself into my work. I knew if I didn’t throw myself into this, I could end up hurt or dead as wel
l. I couldn’t do that to anyone. Shit, I’m sorry I forgot you had a miscarriage, I shouldn’t have mentioned that.”

I couldn’t believe what he’d just told me. He didn’t even know me but was sitting here letting his secrets out. I pulled him into a hug and tried not to cry for him. “Luke, I’m so sorry. I should have not poked my head into here.
Don’t apologize for that. I’m ok now. It wasn’t meant to be.”

He looked at me and gave a small smile, “You didn’t know its ok. You’d have found out eventually. It’s just something really shitty that happened. At first it was very hard, but I had to pull through for myself.
That’s what she would have wanted me to do.”

Neither of us were drunk and I wish that had been my excuse for me but it was nowhere near it.
I don’t know why I was crazy enough to not even think he had a past. Of course he did, we all had those skeletons hiding deep below the surface. I wanted to hug him, more importantly I wanted him to know I was there for him. “What happened? If you don’t mind me asking. You don’t have to tell me if its awkward.”

Shit. What was I thinking asking about it?

He smiled letting me know it was ok that I opened my big mouth and placed his hand on mine. “No don’t worry about it. I met Julianne two and a half years ago. She had come into the tattoo shop I worked at with some friends of hers. She was so scared of getting a tattoo but they somehow talked her into it.” He chuckled at the memory like it was yesterday. “I’ve never been one to believe in love at first sight, well I mean you took my breath away but that’s beside the point. She finally agreed to do the tattoo and I was the one who gave her her very first tattoo. She cried, it was the cutest thing. I swear she made me want to be better. We started talking after that day and slowing dated. She moved in with me a year later. When she got pregnant, that was the happiest day of our lives. We started buying things almost immediately.” He got quiet and I really wished I hadn’t asked. Tears were welling in his eyes and were bound to spill over at any moment. “She had gone to the store to get some ice cream she wanted because I was working late and she just couldn’t wait. An hour later I got the phone call. Some idiot ran his red light and smashed into her car. She was rushed to the hospital but they couldn’t save her or the baby.”