Natural Attraction (13 page)

There, it’s out there.
 

I feel like a huge weight is off my shoulders but I also feel like I am a sad sap.  Jax is going to be upset with me for lying to him. 
For lying to him about my capacity to ride my own horse in front of him. 

I take a deep breath and mentally prepare myself for his payout.  I have earned everything he is about to give me, I know that.

He doesn’t give me long to stew on my own thoughts.

“Why am I repeating myself Ash?”

“Um…  What?” 

Repeating what?

He shakes his head and looks annoyed.

“I said w
hen it’s safe.
  Have you been listening to me at all? All I want is to keep you safe.  There is no way I’m gunna let you anywhere near the back of that horse until I am convinced it’ safe.  So I’ll repeat.  I’m not gunna ride him for you and I’m not gunna re-train him for you.  You are. 

For that to happen, there are a whole heap of things you need to understand about this horse.  There are also a whole heap of signs he needs to give you before I will even consider lett
ing you climb on.  It might take an hour for me to decide he’s safe to ride, it might take a week.  It might even take a year…  Fuck…  I have no idea how long it will it take.  One thing I do know, when I finally decide it’s safe for you to get on Maverick, you’ll both be ready.  I also know that if you are both ready, neither of you will get hurt.  Are you fucking hearing me Ash?”

Holy crap!

I’m hearing you.

Once again it sounds like the answer to my prayers and I send another little thank you up to the Lord for delivering Jax to me.  Although I am still nervous what
safe
might mean (will it
really
be safe), I feel the tension fall out of my body.

A soft warm rush of pure relief flows into my body and washes all the filthy, muddy stress away. 

I can do this.

I look up to see Jax watching me intently.  He is waiting for my answer but I am not sure what I can say to make him understand how relieved I am right now. 

Instead I decide to show him. 

Slowly, almost as if I am afraid he is a horse about to skitter
away, I lift my hand up and pluck his sunglasses gently from his face.  I see a faint look of surprise scoot its way across his eyes before his pupils dilate slightly as he pierces his crystal blue eyes into mine. 

Slowly, licking my lips to moisten them, I watch as his eyes stay glued to mine and I gently lean forward to place the lightest kiss I am capable of, on his right cheek. 

I feel his cheek twitch slightly acknowledging my gentle contact but he remains dead still, almost frozen in time. 

“Thank you,” I say softly.  Then, without waiting for him to say or do anything, I quickly shove his sunglasses in his hand and turn around to face Maverick again.  I am painfully aware that I have just invaded his space.

Time starts to tick in my head.  I am aware that he still hasn’t moved and so I concentrate on my breathing to make sure I am taking long slow breaths.  I hear Jax doing the same thing behind me.

“You’re welcome,” he whispers quietly, still not moving. 

A fleeting feeling of unease passes through me as I struggle to keep my back to him, waiting for him to do something.  It is as if we are frozen in time and neither of us wants to crack the ice or create the first movement. 

A vague memory of our conversation earlier in the day about catatonia sweeps along the edge of my mind.  Thinking I need to do something, I decide to do what feels right in the moment. 

I drop Mavericks lead rope and start heading for the gate.

To my utter relief, Jax appears to ‘get it’ and he unfreezes.  His hand shoot
s out grabbing mine and he spins me back around.  “Where are you going?”

“Um…  Just giving you some space?”

“Why, what makes you think I need some space?”  He asks with a small smirk on his face as he slides his sunglasses back on.

“I was worried I had done something a bit
catastrophic
.”

I smirk back at him before looking at the ground between us.

“No Ash, you did nothing of the sort.  In fact, you did exactly the right thing.”

He smiles at me openly then leans across to grab Mavericks lead rope.  Offering it back to me he says, “Your timing was
perfect.
”

*****

From that point in the day, time flew.  Minutes rolled into hours and for the first time since I had been a little girl, I had a
fantastic
day with my horse.

Well actually fantastic seemed like an underdone statement for the range of emotions that I experienced across the course of the afternoon.  Jax ran me through a series of exercises to help both Maverick and I gain confidence.  He also taught us a lot about keeping Maverick out of my space.

Jax showed me how to flap my arms at him like a chicken if he pushed up behind me.  He showed me how to gently lead him backwards by his tail.  He showed me that for my horse to trust me, I needed to be able to touch every square inch of his body without him flinching or showing any signs of concern.

Jax also showed me lots of body language signs that I needed to watch out for so I knew that Maverick was listening to me.  I was soon spending most of my time focused on Mavericks eyes or his lips.  This was to make sure that he was blinking suitably or that he was sending me ‘got it’ messages.  The got it messages involved him chewing his lips when I was busy teaching him something. 

Now and then I would squeal with glee as we achieved another goal in our exercises and Maverick continued to communicate with me.

I learned to send him backwards, forwards, sidewards.  I learned to send him out into circles with just the hint of a suggestion.  I learned there was no need to ‘chase’ or hound him.  Using a whip to have him keep a circle was not necessary.

I also learned to make him come to me for relief when I had finished asking him to do something.

I was amazed at the way Maverick softened to me over the course of the afternoon.  I loved the strong connection that I could feel was developing.  My love for my horse was once again building a huge lump in my chest and I was awestruck at his beauty.

As he pranced around me, playing with me, ears pricked, waiting for me to ask him to do something else my heart continued to swell.

He was once again my dream horse and the reason I loved Arabians so much.  They were, and always would be, the smartest, fastest learning horses on the planet.  Maverick with his gorgeous dappled silver
gray coat, black mane and tail and black legs to above his knees really did look like a super model.  Add to that the way he pranced around me looking like a painted model horse that you buy in horse stores, there is no way I would ever settle for another breed. 

I have just finished sending him out in a circle on the
longline when I hear Jax call softly from the yard.  Jax had shown me how to use it earlier and he was now at the side of the yard leaning back studying our activities and giving advice.

“Time to set him free Ash.”

Not understanding what he is saying, I drop my shoulder and swing towards Jax to clarify his statement when I hear Maverick give a huge snort and he stops circling. He then bounces up to me before screeching to a halt and snorting again.

I swing my head between Jax and Maverick gobsmacked at Mavericks obvious responsiveness to me.  He has taken my shoulder drop as a cue to come in for relief and it proves that he is connected to me.  That he is listening to my every word and body movement. 

I look back to Jax to see him smiling as he leans back against the yard rail with a look of pride, nodding.

“It’s time to set him free Ash.  Take off the
longline and do it all without it.”

“Are you serious?  Like you do with Trouble?  Just set him free?” I ask incredulously.

“Yep.  He’s not going anywhere.  You’re in a round yard.  There’s nowhere
for
him to go.  Give it a try.” Jax encourages gently.

Having learned to trust Jax’s instincts on timing and progression all afternoon, I quickly slay my brief thoughts of hesitation and do what he suggests.

After unclipping Maverick and carefully placing the clip from the rope on the ground, I turn to Jax and ask, “Now what?”

“Send him out, Ash.  Just do exactly what you’ve been do
ing for the past two hours.  Point with the arm in the direction you want him to go, and send with the other.  Nothing changes.  The only difference is that you don’t have a rope connected.”

Not yet fully convinced that Maverick could be smart enough to learn to be as good as Trouble in just one afternoon, I take a big breath and return my focus to him.  Maverick pins his eyes on me as I point to the left.

To my fascination he launches into action.  Lifting on his toes, I watch as he arches his neck proudly, and flares his nostrils.  He then throws his silver and black tail over his back and prances off in a circle around me.

I am awestruck. 

Never
have I seen Maverick do this sort of thing in such close proximity to me.  Even without a lead rope on he is still connected to me and responding to my cues.

I step back, giving him the cue to face up and change directions.  I hear him blow a huge snort of excitement as he spins quickly towards me and charges off in the other direction. 

It blows my mind. 

It is like watching him perform a dance for me.

I ask for another change of direction, and then another, and he continues to spin at my lightest suggestion of direction changes.

“That’s enough Ash.  Bring him in,” I hear Jax calling from his position at the side of the yard.

I take one final step backwards and look towards Mavericks rear end.  I do it exactly the way Jax has shown me and watch in pure fascination as Maverick once again, literally bounces towards me.  He skids to a stop waiting for his scratch. 

It is awesome.

I can feel the enormous smile that is splitting my face into two and turn to see Jax beaming as well.

“Well done Ash.  That was great.”

“That was more than great, that was life changing Jax.  That has got to be the single most amazing experience I have
ever
had with a horse. 
You
have to be the most bestest, wonderfullest, horse trainer in the entire world!”

I am literally gushing.

Jax continues to smile and a cheeky dimple pops out catching my attention. 

“What about good look
ing.  Am I good looking too babe?” He taunts mischievously.

I blanch a little at his obvious flirt with me. “Um...”

I see his eyebrow lift from behind his sunglasses and his second dimple joins in the action.

“Noth
ing to say? That’s so not like you,” he taunts me again.

“Oh, I’ve got plenty to say.  It’s just that there’s no way I can tell you how good-looking you are while
I am standing here in front of my new number one man, Maverick the wonder horse.  He’d be jealous you know.  I cannot take the risk of it affecting our relationship.” I tease as I turn to lean in and pat Maverick firmly on the neck making a lovely rat-a-tat-tat sound.

I hear Jax sigh softly and look to see him pushing off the fence rail and saunter
ing casually towards me.  Feeling embarrassed at my sidestep from answering his question, I swing my attention back to Maverick. 

I have barely set my eyes on him when I feel two powerful hands clamp down on each of my upper arms.  I am quickly spun around and dragged forwards so my face slams smack bang into Jax’s hard, rippling chest.

What the?

Totally stunned I freeze.  About two milliseconds after that, I register what has happened and my body leaps to respond on my behalf. 

It literally melts into his chest.

I take a huge inwards breath through my nose and smell the amazing scent of Jax.  It is washing powder, cologne and man sweat all mixed to present a heavenly aroma unlike any other I have smelt before. 

Perfect
.

It is then that I am rudely drug out of my drugged thoughts to feel Jax
pounding
on my back.

“What the fuck!” I yell into his chest. 

Does he think I need the
Heimlich Maneuver
or something?

“Do you like this?” He asks as he continues his persistent pounding on my back.

“No!” I continue to yell into his chest, throwing my arms up between us in an attempt to push away from his body.  I need to get away from his insane pounding, it sort of hurts.

In response to this, he quickly stops pounding and starts softly rubbing my back.  His hands change from the savage beat masters I have just experienced, to the gentle, yet firm fingers of a massage god.  He rubs and teases at the muscles on my back, sending shivers down my spine.