My Sister’s Secret (9 page)

‘So you’re a model?’

‘Was.’

‘How did you get into that?’

‘A scout noticed me while I was shopping when I was fifteen. I even did a shoot for
Vogue
once.’

Charity smiled. ‘Very impressive.’

‘It’s hardly difficult, is it? Pouting and throwing some poses.’

Charity took a sip of her iced tea. ‘I’m sure there’s more to it than that, Lana. Did you enjoy it?’

Lana smiled slightly, the first sign of a smile so far. ‘I did actually.’

‘So you were happy?’ Charity asked carefully. ‘You didn’t have moments like what you’ve experienced lately?’

‘No, that happened when I gave it all up, really.’

‘Why
did
you give it all up?’

She shrugged. ‘I guess when I married Dan there was no need to make money any more. And I got so busy with renovating the house, I just ran out of time.’

‘Have you ever considered going back to modelling?’

‘Sometimes.’

‘Maybe that’s something you should consider.’

Lana nodded. ‘You know what, I think I will.’

Charity frowned. It usually wasn’t as easy as this.

Her suspicions were confirmed when Lana started laughing. ‘God, who am I kidding with this bullshit?’ she said. ‘Truth is, I’m just telling you what you want to hear, Charity.’ Charity looked at her in shock. ‘I
hated
modelling,’ Lana continued. ‘It was full of skinny bores like your sister Hope with the added bonus of a coke addiction.’

Charity blinked, not quite believing she was hearing right. ‘I’d rather you didn’t mention my family, Lana.’

‘Why not, you asked me about mine!’

Charity looked back out of the window at Dan who was staring out at the lake, his hands in his pocket.

‘Look, I’m bored out of my fucking mind,’ Lana said, leaning back in her chair. ‘There’s nothing you can do to help me. You need to talk to him,’ she said, jutting her chin at Dan. ‘He needs to pay me more attention. Or if not that, let me buy the house I want in LA. I
love
that place.’

Charity stared at Lana as she smiled to herself. Was she for real? Or was she trying to cover some deep pain she didn’t want Charity to find? She just couldn’t figure her out. Either way, she started to feel for Dan.

‘Have you been to LA?’ Charity asked, trying to bring things back on track.

‘On a modelling assignment, and then for mine and Dan’s honeymoon.’

‘Why do you love it so much?’

‘The weather. The people.’ She yawned. ‘I’m pretty tired actually. Maybe we can continue this chat another time?’

Charity felt a sense of panic. She needed more time with her. What if the last strange few moments were all an act?

‘I’d like to talk to you a little longer, if that’s okay, Lana?’ she said.

‘Oh come on, I’m sure you wouldn’t. It’s like Dan said, you’re on holiday.’ She jumped up, stretching her arms above her head, her shirt rising above her thighs to reveal a neat triangle of pubic hair. Charity turned away, embarrassed. ‘Thanks for coming,’ Lana said, leaning down and giving Charity a kiss on her cheek. Then she skipped out of the room.

‘I’m here if you need me,’ Charity shouted out after her. ‘Any time!’

Lana gave no response.

Charity sat where she was a few moments. She’d seen this before, the quick change of subject, the pretending nothing was wrong. Often, it hid something deeper. But she wasn’t sure with Lana. Maybe she really
was
simply bored? It would explain her attempted manipulation of Charity and Niall.

Either way, she needed more time. If she missed something and Lana hurt herself, she’d never forgive herself.

She walked out to the beach where Dan was now sitting. He was very tanned, small freckles starting to form on his nose.

‘That was quick,’ he said.

‘She didn’t want to talk for long.’

‘How is she?’

‘I’m not sure. I’d like more time to talk to her.’

‘Will she be okay today?’ he asked, peering inside, brow furrowed. ‘After all her talk of ending it…’

‘I think so.’

‘You don’t seem sure.’

‘Like you said, we didn’t talk for long.’

Dan nodded. ‘I understand. Can you stay? Even if it’s just for the day? She might want to talk for longer, take it at her own pace.’

Charity squinted up at the sun. She wasn’t sure what to do. She could head back to the hotel and do what she’d planned: relax. But with Niall there, it was hard. And knowing Lana was here, possibly on the verge of doing something to hurt herself, it made things even more difficult.

‘I’ll stay for a couple of hours,’ she conceded. ‘Maybe if she knows I’m here, she might want to talk again. I don’t want her to feel pressured though. If she clearly doesn’t, I’ll head back.’

Dan nodded, relieved. ‘Thank you. Would you like to sit out here? I can get you some shade?’

‘That would be nice, thanks, Dan.’

A few minutes later she was sitting on a plush sun lounger with an umbrella above her, another iced tea in her hand, Dan beside her, reading a business report.

She took the time to watch the aqua ripples froth against the soft grass banks of the lake. It felt tranquil, contained, a contrast to the sea she’d grown up beside, which had always seemed wild and vast. Maybe Faith would be disappointed with the lake? She always seemed to enjoy the rough ebb and flow of the English Channel. Would she have been disillusioned visiting this place?

Who knew. That was the problem. If only Charity had had more time with her.

‘You seem lost in your thoughts,’ Dan said after a while.

‘More like lost in the past.’

‘Your sister?’

She sighed. ‘Yes.’

‘I understand. I lost my mother a few years ago. Cancer. Whenever I do manage to sleep, I see her.’

‘I’m so sorry to hear that, Dan. You’d think it would get easier over time, wouldn’t you?’

Dan shook his head. ‘I’m afraid it just gets worse for me.’

‘I know the feeling. Each time I leave Busby-on-Sea, I think I can escape the pain. It follows me everywhere though. Then when I return to Busby, it overwhelms me. Everywhere I look, something reminds me of Faith. I’m dreading going back.’

Dan swilled his drink around his glass. ‘Interesting how people cope in different ways. I found I wanted to be reminded as much as possible, hence why I wanted to get a house in the area.’

‘You grew up in Clayton, didn’t you?’ Charity asked, referring to the village next to Busby-on-Sea. ‘I read it in an article.’

‘Yes, funny little town.’

‘Aren’t they all funny little towns around there?’

They both laughed. Then Dan tilted is head, examining Charity’s face. ‘Seeing Niall must bring back memories too?’

She sighed. She’d been stupid to think Dan hadn’t read the article about Niall’s role in her sister’s death. ‘You must think it’s all a bit odd, me and Niall still talking to each other?’

He smiled. ‘On the contrary. I think you must truly love each other to have survived such a thing.’

‘No, Dan,’ she said softly. ‘Our love didn’t survive it.’

‘Are you sure? You must still have feelings for him, I see the way you look at him.’ He laughed. ‘Sorry, I must sound like Lana. But I’m just saying what I see.’

Charity’s face flushed.

‘I imagine it’s hard for you to admit you still have feelings for the man who was jailed for your sister’s death,’ Dan continued.

‘That’s exactly why I don’t have feelings for him.’

‘He was so young, Charity. From what I read in that article about you both, it
was
just an accident.’

Charity felt herself tense. Should she tell him to mind his own business? But the fact was, she didn’t want to. She really felt she could open up to Dan. ‘Yes, it was an accident,’ Charity said, nodding. ‘It really was. But it’ll always be there, what happened that night. Plus it wouldn’t be fair on Hope. She hates Niall. It’s all too much. In the end, the bad outweighs the good when it comes to me and Niall.’

Dan was quiet for a few moments. She wondered if she’d made a mistake opening up like this.

‘Do you miss Niall?’ he asked eventually.

She thought about it. ‘I suppose I do. We were just kids, but we had this connection. And my sisters really did adore him before what happened.’

‘So you were all close?’

Charity nodded. ‘We used to hang out in the school holidays, five years’ worth of them. We grew close. I guess he was like a brother to us. He was such good fun, protective of us too. Seeing him again the past few weeks has brought all that back.’ She looked into Dan’s kind eyes. ‘Can I admit something to you?’

He nodded solemnly. ‘Of course.’

‘I often wonder what would have become of us if Faith hadn’t died.’ She shook her head. ‘God, that sounds selfish, doesn’t it?’

‘Of course not! It’s perfectly natural.’

She smiled. ‘You sound like the counsellor in this conversation.’

He matched her smile, his green eyes sparkling. ‘Okay, imagine I am. What should I say to you now?’

‘You’d tell me it was time I let go of the past…and the guilt.’

‘Guilt?’

‘That it was my boyfriend who caused my sister’s death. And – and I need to stop judging my feelings for Niall. It was an accident. I loved him. Those feelings were –
are
– valid.’

He nodded. ‘Good advice, Charity.’

She leant back in her chair, smiling up at the swaying palm trees as Dan did the same. It was good talking to him.

‘This looks cosy.’

Charity looked over her shoulder to see Lana standing by the sliding doors in a bright yellow bikini, a cocktail in her hand.

Dan jumped up. ‘Hello, darling, how are you?’

‘I’m fine, talking to Charity did me the world of good.’ She shot Charity a smile. Charity frowned.

Lana wrapped her arms around Dan’s waist, pressing her lips against his cheek. ‘You can take Charity back if you want, darling, I’ll come with you.’ She lifted her leg, wrapping it around Dan’s thigh. ‘Then we can go to that place we went to yesterday. Remember?’ she whispered.

Dan carefully unwrapped Lana’s leg. ‘Are you sure you’re okay, darling?’

Lana sighed. ‘I’m fine, honestly. Can we please just stop pretending I’m a mental case? I was drunk when I said I’d top myself.’

Dan looked at Charity, a confused look on his face. Then he sighed. ‘Fine. We’ll take you back, Charity, thank you for your help.’

‘As long as you’re sure,’ Charity said.

Lana looked Charity in the eye, her navy eyes turning to steel. ‘I’m sure.’

After they dropped Charity off, she headed back to her room, her mind buzzing. She just couldn’t figure Lana out. But what else could she do? As she was about to open the door to her villa, she noticed Niall walking down the path outside. He had his head down and was fiddling with his camera, his shoulders already deeply tanned. When he saw her, he slowed down to give her time to get into her villa without having to speak to him. But she realised she didn’t want him to. After the strange past few hours with the peculiar Norths, she welcomed a familiar
sane
face. Charity smiled to show him she was fine with seeing him.

‘You heading out?’ she asked him, gesturing to the rucksack on his back.

‘Yep, diving the forest.’

‘Great. You’ll love it.’

‘Come with me?’

Charity stared at him, not quite sure what to say.

He laughed. ‘Sorry, that just came out without me thinking.’

‘Do you know what?’ Charity said, thinking of the conversation she’d just had with Dan about her feelings for Niall. ‘I think I’d like to go now actually.’

Niall’s face lit up. ‘Great.’

They both laughed and it was like they were teenagers again.

‘It must’ve been strange seeing the three of us turn up the other night?’ Niall said, as they headed out into the lake on Dan’s hired boat.

‘Very.’

‘Lana’s an odd one. It looks like Dan’s the one with all the power when I think it’s actually her.’

Charity sighed. She didn’t want to talk about Lana. She gestured to Niall’s camera. ‘You excited about taking photos?’

‘Yep.’

She smiled. ‘You used to have that old camera when we were kids but I never thought you wanted to make a career out of it.’

‘Faith suggested it to me actually.’

Charity frowned. ‘Really?’

‘Yeah. I was trying to figure out what to do with my life and she said if I loved diving so much, I ought to look for a career that involved it. She kind of threw the underwater photographer idea in randomly with a few others. I guess it stuck.’

‘I like that Faith influenced you like that.’ Charity examined Niall’s face. His cheeks were red from the sun, the rest of his skin tanned and stubbled. The scar on his chin was puckered and white, his lips slightly dry. His blue eyes stood out, so distinctive and alarming. She couldn’t help but feel her body react. ‘I don’t think I’ve said how much it meant to me to hear you came back to Busby to find the submerged forest,’ she said softly.

‘I didn’t.’

‘What do you mean?’

‘I came back for you, Charity.’ She swallowed, unable to drag her eyes away from his intense gaze. ‘I heard you were back and I couldn’t help myself. I needed to see you again, even if it was just one last time.’

Charity’s heart thumped against her chest. She thought of their last meeting on that windswept beach the week after Faith died. ‘You were the one who said we must never see each other again.’

‘For your own good. ’

The boat slowed down, the submerged forest coming into view. But Charity and Niall only had eyes for each other. To Charity, it felt as though she’d jumped into the lake already and was swirling in uncontrollable currents as she looked into his eyes.

‘We’re here,’ the captain said.

Niall dragged his eyes away from Charity’s. ‘Wow,’ he said as he looked out at the submerged forest, what remained of the trees darting up from the lake’s shimmering surface.

‘Impressive, isn’t it?’ Charity said.

‘Very. Shall we get ready?’

Charity nodded, suddenly feeling self-conscious; she’d need to strip down to her navy swimsuit in front of Niall. She pulled her shorts and vest top off with her back to Niall, conscious of her round tummy and dimpled thighs. Out of the corner of her eye she noticed Niall watching her as he pulled his t-shirt off. He held her gaze again and she felt her skin flush. He looked so handsome, blue eyes so vivid. She could hardly breathe.