My Name Is River Blue (33 page)

"Oh, crap.
I forgot." I ran my tongue over the sharp edge of the tooth and felt my
fat nose. I laughed when I thought of how many photos people had already taken.
It was even funnier because I was so happy that I wasn't feeling much pain. I
knew that I would be hurting later that night and the following day, but for
the moment, I didn't care. "Ah, it don't matter, let the picture
ride."

"Well,
thanks a lot, River," said Sergeant Cox. "Stevie, thank River for
being so nice."

Stevie thanked
me, and I gave him a quick hug and a bigger surprise. "Sergeant Cox, give
me a few days to get over my bumps and bruises, and if you and Stevie are
interested, maybe we could meet at the park and throw the ball around some. He
could invite a few friends if he wants."

"For real?"
Stevie asked.

"Sure. Just
call Tolley House and ask for me. If I'm not there, leave your name and
number."

"River,
that's very kind of you," said Sergeant Cox. "You're an exceptional
young man. Thank you."

As I watched
Stevie and his dad walk away, I was glad that the boy had a real home with parents
who loved him, and I felt good knowing that I made his day a little better. I
realized that even a state kid like me could make a difference in someone's life,
and I decided to give more thought to how I could help kids who might not be as
lucky as Stevie and I were. It was an idea that would stay with me and grow.

When I saw Carlee
approach me, I was glad that we were getting along. Within a week after our
fight at her holiday party our freshman year, we agreed that we should only be
friends until we matured enough to know if we wanted more and how to handle it.
I honestly thought that our worlds were too different for us ever to have a
serious relationship, but I was thankful that we would remain friends. It
didn't take long for me to see that Carlee's agenda had not changed.

For the next
three years, Carlee dated a few other guys, but she tried many times to turn
our friendship into an exclusive romantic relationship, which only resulted in
more fights and more promises from her. No matter what I said, she was stuck on
the notion that I secretly wanted her for my girlfriend. After our last fight,
I made it clear that she had lost any chance she ever had of us being a couple,
and I warned her that she was on the verge of losing me as a friend.

During the few
weeks prior to the championship game, Carlee finally appeared to have accepted
my terms. I was glad because even during the times when Carlee made me so angry,
I still cared about her more than I wanted to admit. It was a good sign when
she gave me a congratulatory hug and a kiss that was no more romantic than the
hug and kiss from Jenny Mackey. In those few minutes I spent with Carlee,
surrounded by a crowd of happy people celebrating our championship, I could
tell that she had really changed, and I thanked her for being my friend.

When my team's
celebration of our third championship was over for the night, my spirits were
slightly dampened by the knowledge that I would never again dress out in my Hawks'
royal blue and gold to play another high school football game. I was going to
miss my days at Harper Springs High because no matter what I did in college or
the pros, I would never again have the same thrill of going from social zero to
town hero.

***

Papa hosted a
popular, annual barn party for the football team at Deer Lake Farm during the
week following Christmas. There was music, dancing, skits, and plenty of good
food. It gave the players a chance to hang out as friends before school resumed
after the holidays, but more importantly, it was the last time the whole team
would gather as a group. In addition to the players, the attendees included the
cheerleaders, team managers, trainers, and coaching staff. There were no family
members or fans, but players could bring their girlfriends if they wanted. At
the high school, the team had already had a separate awards banquet attended by
family, friends, boosters, high school staff, and members of the local news
media.

In our room at
Tolley House, I dressed for the barn party and tried not to throw a damp blanket
on Ant's good mood. My roommate enjoyed parties, and he was obviously pumped
and primed to have a good time. As for me, I thought of the party as not only a
celebration, but as the end of a special era in my life. It was a scary thought
to trade the best four years of my life for the unknown.

People kept
telling me that my golden future was assured and that success was simply waiting
for me to claim it, but ever since the night of our last title win, I carried a
feeling that everything was just too perfect for a state kid like me. I kept
waiting for something to go wrong but I could think of no legitimate reason to
worry. It had even been three years since I got the second threatening note,
which was also the last one. There was no sign of anything going wrong in my
life. I should have felt on top of the world.

I wished that I were
more like Ant. He talked of little else but going to Papa's "awesome barn
party" that night and then to Max Summers' New Year's Eve party in a few
days. I rolled my eyes at Ant, who hardly took a breath as he discussed his
slick plans to use his popularity while he was still a hot item. I knew where
he was heading when he referred to himself as a "hot item," and I
pleaded with my excited roommate not to start.

Ant, dressed only
in his boxers, ignored me and began dancing around our room. He partly sang and
partly rapped a song that went something like "party night for a football
stud cattin' around the ladies," followed by the unintelligible muttering
Ant used when he couldn't think of lyrics that rhymed. Since his verbal play
was going badly, he jumped into his interpretation of dirty dancing with an
imaginary, sexy girl boasting huge breasts. I could almost see his invisible,
slutty partner, as he repeatedly squeezed and licked the air where her big boobs
might have been. He swung his hips side to side, and began wailing a new song.
It was so bad and so loud that Jeff Simms, our young foster brother, ran dripping
wet from the shower room to see if one of us was sick. I told him not yet, but I
was getting close.

As we normally
did, Ant and I were saving gas money by riding together to the party. After we
obtained our driver's licenses, Papa had given each of us a great deal on a
dependable used car. We made interest-free payments to Papa with the money we
earned working at Long's Fitness Center and Deer Lake Farm. We could afford our
car payments, gas, maintenance, taxes, and insurance, but we had little money
left for anything else. If I had extra money after paying bills, I deposited a
little in my savings account while Ant was more likely to spend than to save.

After Ant and I
threw on our jackets, we found Hal and Jenny in the kitchen to tell them we were
on our way to the barn party. It was a house rule to check with them before we
left.

Hal and Jenny
asked the same questions and gave the same advice that they always did before Ant
and I left the house.

"Are you
two planning to go anywhere else but Papa's barn?" Hal asked.

"No,
sir," answered Ant. "I'm driving my car, and we should be back by
midnight, but if we're too tired to drive home, Papa will let us stay. The
coaches will be there to supervise us, and we're taking our new cell phones
Papa bought us for Christmas."

Papa had added
Ant and I to his cell plan, and we paid nothing as long we kept our minutes and
texts to a minimum.

Jenny spoke up
with a warning. "Boys, the weather report said we might have some light
sleet or freezing rain overnight. It didn't sound like a big deal, but just be
aware when you begin driving back home. If you think the roads are slick, stay
over with Papa. I'll call one of you if I hear a report about icy roads
conditions. Let us know if you're going to be later than midnight."

"Yes,
ma'am." We answered at the same time as we edged towards the door.

"Okay,
boys, drive safely and have a good time," said Hal.

We hurried out
the door and a minute later, I was buckling my seatbelt in Ant's little Chevy
Malibu. Ant seldom wore a seatbelt if he was driving at night when cops were
not likely to see him. Each time we began a trip, I told him that he should
buckle up, but Ant only complied in town. A Harper Springs cop had once caught
him, but a football player was never fined for a small offense, and in Ant's
case, the cop decided to be cool and not mention it to our guardians. He made
Ant promise to wear his seat belt, which lasted until we were out of town.

As we drove
away, Ant performed good-natured imitations of our house parents giving their
somber warnings that only changed with the weather. He had me laughing hard by
the time we turned onto Hwy 8, the two-lane country highway that led us to Deer
Lake Farm, the barn party, and the night that changed our lives forever.

CHAPTER
EIGHTEEN

When Ant and I drove
onto Papa's property, we saw many of our teammates' cars and trucks parked near
the second barn, a huge structure, which was about one hundred fifty yards from
the house. The barn's concrete floor had been cleaned, and there was a pleasant
smell of sweet hay in fresh air. In addition to the stalls, which were empty
for the party, there was a tack room, an office, a supply room, a half bathroom,
and a small kitchen. At one end of the barn away from the stalls, Papa had
cleared a large area of the floor to make room for folding tables and chairs. A
food buffet had been set on three long tables placed end to end near the
kitchen. As we walked farther into the barn, the smell of barbeque meat had my
mouth watering.

When Ant and I saw
people lining up to fill their plates, we headed that way, and as usual, we
didn't make it far before our teammates yelled greetings from wherever they
were and made their usual jokes. They referred to me as "his majesty,"
and one of them fell on his knees and thanked me for blessing them with my
presence. The older guys who knew me best enjoyed having fun with me, but there
was no ill intent. It was simply the way that we razzed each other. Ant suffered
similar treatment, but the guys didn't take things nearly as far with him as
they did with me.

When Ant and I
joined the buffet line, the younger players and cheerleaders gathered around us
and did their best to act as if we had all been best friends for years. After four
years, I was used to the spotlight that brought me a few real friends, and many
more people, who just wanted to share the artificial light with me.

Carlee Summers
and Tina Woodson suddenly appeared in the buffet line beside us. Carlee handed me
a plate stacked high with barbeque meat and sides, and Tina offered Ant a plate
equally over-filled. The girls then directed us to a table, which two freshman
cheerleaders had saved for the four of us seniors. It was nice having the girls
take care of us.

Carlee and I
were still on good terms, just as we had been on the night of the state title
game, and it was a relief to me that our relationship as friends was working
with no plotting on Carlee's part to make us any more than that. We had not had
a single argument since she apologized for the homecoming game fiasco two
months earlier.

To say that the
night of our homecoming game was awkward is like saying the Titanic took on a little
water after the ship hit an iceberg. I vividly remember how nervous I was when
Ant and I drove away from the football stadium's parking lot that night. I had
good reason to worry that the cops would arrest me before morning.

***

Before the
students voted for homecoming king and queen, the committee chairperson, Nancy
Graves, told me that Carlee and I were a lock to be the royal couple. I told
Nancy that I would not accept homecoming king and advised her to find someone
else to stand with Carlee at the ceremony. When Carlee mentioned homecoming to me,
I told her that I did not want her to be embarrassed, so if the students elected
me king, Nancy should award the title to the guy in second place.

I didn't know
until after homecoming that Nancy was such a bitch and hated Carlee so much.
Nancy convinced Carlee that I really wanted to be homecoming king because it
would give me a way to be close to her without admitting that I wanted to start
over. As was normal for her, Carlee ignored what I told her and believed Nancy
because it was what Carlee
wanted
to believe.

The school
administration planned to hold the crowning ceremony during half time of the homecoming
game. From a mobile stage at midfield, Principal Wilson would announce the name
of the new queen who was supposed to join him on the stage where he would crown
her and present her with flowers. Then he would announce the king, crown him,
and allow him to give the queen a chaste kiss on the cheek. After a few pictures
and a wave to the crowd, the couple would ride around the football field in a
convertible while the crowd applauded. After the game, the king and queen would
attend the homecoming dance where they would continue to be the center of
attention. Things did not go nearly as smoothly as planned.

Ant told me that
when Principal Wilson announced Carlee Summers as homecoming queen, she did the
whole "I'm so surprised and humble" routine complete with a few tears
shed at the very idea of her winning such an honor. When she walked to the
stage, Wilson crowned her and presented her with roses, which caused a few more
tears. Ant said Carlee looked good and was sporting some new, dangly diamond
earrings. It was typical of how Big Bill Summers blew money on his baby girl so
that she could show off his wealth.

There were loud
cheers and applause when Principal Wilson announced that I had won homecoming
king, which I knew was true because I heard it all the way into the locker room
where I stayed after the rest of the team left for the ceremony. When I didn't
come to the stage, and the crowd's cheers turned to mumbles, Coach Haney asked Ant
about me. Ant told the coach the truth, and the coach walked to the stage and
whispered to Principal Wilson, who did a poor job of hiding his anger for a
moment before he gathered his composure. Wilson forced a smile as he moved to
the microphone to inform everyone that I was unable to participate in the
ceremony because of a mild injury for which I was receiving treatment in the locker
room.

Carlee guessed the
truth and was shocked that I had the audacity to do exactly what I told her I would.
It didn't occur to her at the time that Nancy set her up to look foolish. With
a smile, she did her best to convince her friends that I was truly receiving
treatment in the locker room and that I was going to the dance with her.
However, she told her father how humiliating it was for her to stand alone on
the stage and that she would be devastated if I didn't take her to the
homecoming dance. I was surprised that "daddy" didn't attempt to drag
me off the field during the second half of the game.

Carlee's
expectation was even crazier because I had only gone to a high school dance
twice in four years. She knew that I had never gone to a homecoming dance or
the prom, and in my senior year, I still could not afford to waste money on a new
suit nice enough to stand next to Carlee in her expensive gown and matching
accessories. I refused to take money out of my small savings account to buy her
a corsage, purchase admittance tickets, and pay the photographer "to
capture our memories" of the evening. Papa would have given me the money,
but I was already uncomfortable with how much he did for Ant and me, and I
would not take advantage of his generosity for something that meant nothing to
me.

In Carlee's
spoiled world where she didn't understand words like "budget," she
could not believe that I would not even splurge for the extra gas it would take
to drive to the dance. She ignored the fact that I had to earn every dollar I needed
to pay for anything more than my basic needs, and she had no clue what life was
like for a kid without the support of a family. Lastly, she couldn't accept the
fact that I wouldn't ask her to be my date even if I could afford to spend the
money.

After the
homecoming game, Ant and I showered, dressed, and hurried out of the locker
room into the cool night air. We had a long walk through the parking lot, as we
were at least ten light poles away in the closest part of the student parking
section. With a donation, booster club members "bought" the choice
parking spots each year, which put them closest to the stadium. The next
sections of parking were for the rest of the fans, followed by teachers and staff,
and lastly, the students parked on the far side of the lot.

Ant was rushing
to get home and change clothes because he had accepted Tina's offer to give him
the money he needed to take her to the homecoming dance. That was a major
difference between Ant and me. Tina's family had money, and Ant was fine with
allowing Tina to pay for any of their dates. He had no problem with spending
her money for a date or simply telling her when he needed some cash. I would
have never accepted money from a girl I dated, and when I asked Ant how he
could ask her for money, he said that he was doing her a favor. If she gave
money to him, she was helping the needy as her minister suggested a good
Christian should do, instead of wasting it like a spoiled rich girl.

There were about
a dozen vehicles left in the student parking lot, but I didn't see any people
until we were almost to Ant's car. I saw what appeared to be a large shadow
near it, but as my angle adjusted with the light of the nearest pole, I
determined that it was Carlee's father leaning against the passenger side door.
He had to be at least 6' 5" and 260 pounds, and every time I saw him, I
thought "Big Bill" was a suitable nickname. I had a good idea why Mr.
Summers was there.

Since he was
blocking the door to my side of Ant's car, I could not avoid speaking to him, and
I decided to be polite. I wanted to avoid an argument with Mr. Summers, but I
didn't think he was there to congratulate me on our win.

"Hello, Mr.
Summers. Something I can do for you?"

"Are you
feeling better?" Summers' tone was nicer than I expected.

"Feeling
better?" At the time, I didn't know about the reason the principal gave
everyone for my no show at the crowning ceremony.

"Yeah, I
heard you were being treated in the locker room at half time, and that's why
you didn't join Carlee on the stage."

"No, sir. I
didn't participate. I told the homecoming chairman and Carlee two weeks ago,
and a couple of times since then that I would not accept homecoming king."

His smile faded.
I had reached my final height of 6'2" and still, I had to look up at the
nasty expression on Big Bill's face. He looked at me as if I had kicked mud on
his expensive suit, and he was obviously struggling to control his anger.

"So, you
mean you left Carlee hung out to dry? Do you think that's how you should treat
a young lady on your first date?"

"Mr.
Summers, like I said, I never asked Carlee to the homecoming dance. I'm not dating
Carlee or anyone else. I've never gone to a homecoming dance, and I'm not going
to this one." It was hard for me to believe that he was so accepting of
Carlee and me dating. I thought he would be happy that I would not be with his
daughter. I could only believe that Carlee had him wrapped tighter than I
thought.

Big Bill's face
flooded a deep crimson as he stepped closer to me. I stood my ground, close
enough to smell his Old Spice. Close enough to count the hairs sprouting from
his ears and his nose, and unfortunately, close enough to notice that he needed
mouthwash.

Recognizing the
potential for trouble, Ant came around from the driver's side of his car and
stood just a couple of steps to the side of us.

"So, you're
telling me that you don't want to date Carlee, and you never asked her to the
dance?" His voice was noticeably louder. His body was shaking.

"Sir, I'm
telling you that we haven't agreed to go to any dance since we were freshmen,
and I don't want to date Carlee. She asked me to the homecoming dance, but I
told her at least three times that I could not afford to go and that I was not
interested in dating her. The problem is that Carlee only sees things like she
wants them to be, and she ignores an answer that she doesn't like."

Summers grew an
ugly scowl on his face, and for a moment, I thought the man would hit me, but
all of the sudden, his expression relaxed. It was a strain, but the man did his
best to sound friendly with his next words. He was a good enough businessman
that he was adept at changing tactics to get the results he desired.

"Listen, River.
I think I know what the problem is. You can't afford a new suit, flowers,
pictures, and all that garbage, and you're too proud to ask anyone for help. I
respect that you don't want any charity, but I can help you out, and no one will
ever know. Tommy, my sister's son, is staying with us right now, and he's almost
your exact size. I'm sure one of Tommy's nice suits would fit you. I can have
Tim Gibson get a corsage from his shop, and I can give you the money you need
for other expenses and a little extra just for you. It's an easy fix. Carlee
and you can make a fashionably late entrance with all the other kids staring at
Carlee's gown that cost me a mint. This means a lot to Carlee, and with a
little effort, we could give her the night she deserves."

"Mr.
Summers, I think it's great that you want to give Carlee a nice night, but
you'll have to do it without me. I'm not a dress, a piece of jewelry, or a new
phone you can buy Carlee to make her happy. If you want to spend money on
something that she needs, buy her a few sessions with a therapist. You might
get a group discount for the whole family."

The blood rushed
back to Bill Summers' face, and it occurred to me where Carlee got the notion
that no one was supposed to say "no" to her. I braced for the man to
get physical, but he tried to belittle me instead.

"It's just
as well, boy. Carlee begged me to let her have this one date with you, but I
was against the public seeing her with your kind. You think you're God's gift
to Harper Springs right now because you can throw a football, but you're one
injury away from people treating you like the trash you are. Just like your own
mother treated you when the slut dumped you like garbage to be a burden on
decent people."