My Kiasu Teenage Life in Singapore (3 page)

2  Look right, then left, then right again before crossing the road

3  See the doctor immediately if you get sick

4  Study hard (do well in Maths)

5  Keep warm at night

6  Bring an umbrella when you go out in case it rains

7  Eat fruits and vegetables

We've all been so lazy!! I haven't studied at all.

We call RI (Raffles' Institution, the top school in Singapore): Retarded Institution; while the guys call my school CHIJ: Crazy Hypocrites, Idiotic Jerks! Ha! Ha! Ha!

Love, Pei Yi

Monday 6 January

Dear Mei Yee

Yippee!! I got into AEP!! So happy. Jen Nee, Alisa and Nancy also got in. Jen Nee was worried about the art history part 'coz it's quite difficult. We have to write essays and stuff. Mr Como (AEP teacher) said it's good to know art history 'coz when you go to formal functions or art galleries with high-class people, they always talk about art and music.

I'm now in the prep room (I have prep from 7.30 to 9.30 pm). It's air-conned, and for each person there are three boards on top of the table, one in front of you, two on the sides. We call it a hutch. Pau Leen sits beside me. I took a photo of her to show you. She grinned the Abominable Snowman grin for the photo.

Yesterday, for signature hunt, Betty made me slow-dance with a guy named Cheng Hoe. It was embarrassing. He dared not put his hands on my waist. He said he had never touched a girl before. He looks like the very
kuai
kind of guy but he can actually be quite good looking. Then Betty made me go up to the first floor and shout down, “Cheng Hoe, I love you! Marry me!” Two years ago, Pau Leen was awarded first prize for Signature Hunt for getting the most signatures and for being a good sport.

I received your letter today. I was so happy. I check the office three or four times a day for letters. I read your letter and started crying and laughing at the same time. Alisa and Nancy were laughing at me laughing and crying, like I was mad or something.

OK, now to reply to your letter. How many letters from me have you received? It's funny if you receive some and you write to me while I'm writing to you and you haven't received them. I kept laughing hysterically while reading your letter. I was in my room, of course. Don't write “If you want to know, tell me!” Just tell me! You know I always want to know about everything that happens! I don't understand your map of CHIJ. I think it's wrong. CONGRATS to the new black-belt girl: Mei Yee!! I just found out Alisa has a black belt in taekwondo and a teaching certificate too. Her master has seven dan in black belt. No wonder she has such beautiful legs! My letters are written on few pages but they have a lot of words—all compressed. WRITE more and often!!!! And answer ALL my questions.

There is this guy named Matt who's quite good looking but I dislike his attitude. He's all smiles for Alisa whom he's interested in but never smiles at us!! Alisa has a great body and looks so beautiful. She has A LOT of guy friends in Malaysia.

Today, I ate potato chips (nearly the whole tube is gone) and Chicken In A Biskit (yum, yum). And the school canteen food is delicious. I just have an insatiable appetite for food, food, food. The hostelites here waste so much food every single night—it fills three huge dustbins!! What a terrible waste.

Unlike in Malaysia, the teachers here prepare for their lessons. For English, our teacher gave us two comics entitled
How To Be A Good Wife
and the other
How To Be A Good Husband.
So funny. The Accounts teacher once worked in the business group of a departmental store. She told us the importance of learning Accounts. We've an overhead projector (OHP) in our class. She even drew and coloured “WELCOME to Principles of Accounts” for the OHP. I keep some of my textbooks in my desk in school. (There's no afternoon session.)

Our History teacher is hilarious. We were learning about Malacca and it was so funny 'coz she kept saying, “Parameswara ran away and brought his wife along”. She kept mentioning his wife. I find it funny that my classmates find Malay words like Majapahit, Parameswara and Palembang difficult to pronounce. They don't even understand their own national anthem because it's in Malay. They all sing very softly—I don't sing at all. And when they say the Singapore pledge or prayers, I don't join in either. One classmate of mine asked me if we live in trees in Malaysia, and whether we have radios!

Another classmate said to me that I speak very good English. (She probably thinks Malaysians only speak Malay.) I told her that since it's my best language, it doesn't count. (No one would say to an American that he speaks good English.)

We don't use exercise books here. We use foolscap paper and then file them up in ring binders.

I'm not sociable here at all. So sad. Sometimes I'm OK, sometimes I'm sad. Sometimes, living in a hostel is very fun, with funny people like Pau Leen and others around. I don't really like Nicole (my roommate) very much, but she's very sociable and well-liked and
manja.
Nancy is very funny too but I don't know why most of them don't like her much. They say I'll realize after knowing Nancy for a longer time.

Pau Leen repaired my alarm clock but the alarm rings six hours ahead of the set time. If you set it at six o'clock, it rings at twelve o'clock; if you set it at three o'clock, it rings at nine o'clock!

Prep time is over. Sometimes I like it here 'coz the lessons in school are nice, like those you see on TV. No, not that nice, but still nice. We don't really get much homework. I spend very little time studying. Maybe 'coz it's still the beginning of the year.

I haven't done ANYTHING today.

Tuesday 7 January

Dear Mei Yee

It's prep time on Tuesday now.

After school we stayed back for AEP until 5.30 pm. Mr Como and MrHuff took us to Ang Mo Kio by MRT. Isn't the name Ang Mo Kio(White Person Bridge) funny? Jen Nee, Alisa and Nancy are in Mr Huff'sgroup. I'm in Mr Como's where there're no Malaysians. Mr Como isnicer, but I prefer Malaysians to Singaporeans. Anyway, the group I waswith was bad-mouthing Nancy about her constant singing. Nancy cansing high-pitched quite well; I don't know why people dislike it. Alisadoesn't like Singaporeans 'coz they bad-mouth people.

Mr Como looks like the typical fatherly type of American that you see on TV: big and bearded. I wonder if I would recognize him if I saw him in America.

We drew a scene we chose ourselves in a park, something like Mengkuang Dam. Mr Como took a photo of the scene each of us chose. We just drew with pencils today; maybe we'll paint it next week. AEP is organizing an art tour to Europe which costs over S$4000. And also a camp (everything paid by MOE) in Atlanta, USA, but they'll only choose one girl from CHIJ, and you have to prepare ten pictures, framed and all, and go for an interview. Everything in AEP is paid for by MOE, even drawing paper. With us joining (about nine new girls), MOE gave the AEP programme in our school a few thousand dollars.

Just now, after prep, the Sec 3s had a meeting to discuss what item to present for the ASEAN Scholars Orientation and I was very quiet. I feel so sad about being so unsociable and quiet. I feel quite out of place in school and in the hostel sometimes when everyone gets together. I feel terrible but here I am, stuck for years.

Wednesday 8 January

Dear Mei Yee

I wish I had someone I'm close to here. It's terrible to be without a close friend.

I've decided NOT to take Malay as first language. It's boring. I don't like it, I'll have to take the bus to the Language Centre to learn it, and I already have nine subjects including AEP. I'm learning about vernier calipers and whatsitsname … the micrometer screw or something, like your first chapter. I like lessons in school.

I'm so very sleepy in school 'coz everyday I wake up early and go to sleep late. I had to pull my eyes open and force myself not to fall asleep during History and Accounts. I like the Accounts teacher. She said she changed her job to become a teacher partly 'coz the people in the business world were very corrupt and would do anything for money. She said she'll teach us about shares and the stock market later in the year. This money business is very interesting, isn't it?

Betty said she was treated quite hostilely by Singaporeans when she first came. She said some Singaporeans dislike ASEAN scholars because ASEAN scholars are smart and there'll be more competition. But now her life here is better than her life in Malaysia.

Jen Nee is disorganized too. Sometimes worse than me. Sometimes she looks like Donald Duck with a cute, silly look on her face and walks a bit like Donald Duck.

I can't mix well with guys (what's new). There're only two or three that I smile to. Leo, a Sec 1 guy, always smiles at me and says, “Hi!” He's very crazy and sociable to everyone. And he always runs around instead of walking! Everyone thinks he's a sissy.

Love, Pei Yi

Thursday 9 January

Dearest Mei Yee

I'd already written a letter to be posted but I received your letter just now (five minutes ago) so I'm going to put this one in the same envelope too. No, I can't. It'll be too heavy. Forget the sentences above. OK. I received your letter today!

Remember I told you about Yoonphaik, the nice girl? Well, today she told me and Jen Nee about Christianity. She's a Christian and I can feel her faith and love for Jesus as she tells us about Him. She once practiced witchcraft! Voodoo and all those things! Unbelievable, isn't it???!!! I was damn shocked. She could read people's minds and had psychic powers and all that. She learned it from the satanic books. She said she used to feel very dark and empty but after believing in Christianity, she changed. I could see that her faith is very strong. She invited us to join her church. She said (in answer to my question) that if there're two people, both equally good, and one is a Christian and the other isn't, the Christian will go to Heaven and the other to Hell. I can't accept that at all. Of course I didn't tell her that I didn't believe.

My horoscope this week says that I need to resolve a conflict with an old friend?! Yours says that you will find new surprises from old things! Oh ya, Yoonphaik used to live her life according to horoscopes!

It rains nearly everyday in Singapore.

OK, now (at last), to reply to your much aniticipated letter. I'm going to bring a lot of things here when I go back to BM, including your pencil-holder. I couldn't bring it the first time 'coz I had too many items to carry.

Now you know what I meant when I said I've got to tell you everything or it won't seem like it has happened. Have you found any close friends in BM? I haven't. I think I never will. Maybe I'll find good friends but never another best friend. I feel like my class in CHIJ is not really my class. OK, I'll buy books for you. Wow, I think you're great to pass black belt without practising. If I were to continue learning taekwondo, I don't think I would ever get a black belt. Are you happy about the Jackson thing? He must really like you a lot! Lucky you! So are you going to smile at Jackson the next time you see him? You're going to receive disgusting smiles every week!

Glad you've found such a good violin teacher. I still feel you should make use of your piano talents. I bet your violin playing will be very good. Actually I think you can really excel in any field you like if you work hard on it. You don't really work hard, do you? I'm also very lazy and hate to try my best.

The red ink and the blue ink in this letter are in the same pen. Depends on which way you turn it. Everyday, I keep thinking, “How nice if now I'm doing this with Mei Yee, how nice if Mei Yee's living in the same room as me …” Ya, it's funny that things are happening to both of us now and we don't know what. You reply to one letter and I've already posted another, then you receive that letter and I receive your letter before you receive my letter. It's quite confusing. I mean, now I'm writing this letter but you might have just received the previous one and be replying to me while I'm replying to your earlier letter. Get what I mean? We're not in sync!

The Chem & Physics I'm studying now is quite easy 'coz I'm not in the Science stream. I like Accounts 'coz the teacher is nice. She decorates her transparencies (for the overhead projector) nicely and colours it, and it makes lessons interesting.

Last night after prep, there was a Batchlings (each class is a “Batch” so all the Sec 3s are my Batchlings) meeting again to plan for our Orientation. We tried to plan a sketch with a dance in it. I wasn't as quiet as in the first meeting. Anyway, we couldn't decide on anything so we chose three guys and three girls to form a committee. You could have helped give ideas and dances if you were here. Your creativity would have been useful.