My Favorite Mistake (15 page)

“He's not lame,” Tommi snapped. “He was never lame.”

Summer raised her eyebrows. “Oooookay,” she said. “I guess I must have imagined watching you scratch from that jumper class last weekend. Anyway, I was just going to say it's nice to see you on Toccata. You two are always amazing together.”

“Thanks,” Tommi said, not sure whether to feel more annoyed by Summer's typical sucking up or guilty for snapping at the girl for a relatively innocent comment. “I just meant Legs wasn't really
lame
lame. I just wasn't sure he—whatever. It doesn't matter.”

Suddenly sick of thinking about it, she picked up her reins and sent Toccata into a trot. All she wanted to do for the next hour was turn off her brain and ride.

Halfway to the tack room, Kate could already hear the others laughing and talking. The scents of hot tomato sauce, cheese, and garlic drifting down the aisle were as familiar as those of hay and horses. Time for the juniors' postlesson pizza.

Fitz waved when she came in. He was lounging against an empty saddle rack shoving pizza into his mouth. She felt herself blush as her mind jumped back to their private little
picnic earlier—especially the last part, after Fitz had finished eating. They'd lost track of time and almost been late to the lesson, but Kate couldn't quite manage to be sorry about that. Still, she did her best to push aside the memories, not wanting anyone else to guess what she was thinking.

Everyone else was already there. Tommi, Marissa, and Zara were sitting on the bench. Summer was standing nearby, waving her hands around as she talked to them. Dani had just grabbed another slice, stepping over Jamie's bulldog to get it. As usual, Chaucer was planted right in front of the boxes on the bandage trunk, while the younger dogs worked the room, begging for scraps.

“Hi,” Kate said to Fitz, bending over to grab a slice of plain cheese from one of the boxes. “What's all the excitement?”

Fitz smirked. “Summer's just whining because she got shut out in the eq. Again.”

Summer heard him and looked over. “Shut up,” she said. “You know I'm totally right. That girl only pinned higher than me because her mother's head trainer at that big barn on Long Island, and the judge obviously knew it.”

“Get over it, Summer,” Dani said. “That girl beat you because she's ridden like ten horses a day since she was in diapers.”

Marissa picked a gob of gooey cheese off her pizza and fed it to one of the dogs. “Yeah. Or if anything gives her an edge, it's that she's even taller and skinnier than Kate.” She glanced down at herself with a rueful smile. “Which pretty much explains why
I
never pin in the eq.”

Dani, Tommi, and Fitz laughed, but Summer shot Kate an irritated glance. “Being tall and skinny didn't help Kate much
this time, did it?” she snapped. “Even
I
beat her. And I'm not tall, or a trainer's kid, or even a working student who gets fancy horses to ride for free anytime she wants. So there!” She flounced over and grabbed another slice of pepperoni.

Kate froze in mid-bite, suddenly feeling like some kind of gangly eight-foot-tall beanpole freak. Was that really what Summer and the others thought of her? That she only won because Jamie gave her horses to ride for free? What did any of these people know about her, anyway? What did they know about all the work she had to put in to earn those rides?

Tommi frowned. “Shut the hell up, Summer,” she said. “Don't take it out on Kate just because you're feeling pissy about your own riding.”

“Yeah.” Marissa giggled. “Look on the bright side—at least you didn't do a face plant over the first jump like that poor kid from Maple Mount whose horse tripped …”

Kate didn't hear the rest. Fitz had just stepped around the trunk and sidled up next to her. She was so distracted she almost choked on the big bite of pizza in her mouth. Swallowing it down in a loud gulp, she smiled up at him uncertainly.

“Don't pay any attention to Summer, gorgeous,” he whispered, slipping an arm around her shoulders. “She's just jealous because you're hotter
and
more talented than she is.”

Kate just shrugged, shooting the other girls a glance. She still felt self-conscious, as if everyone in the room was judging everything about her, even though the others had already moved on to gossiping about someone else. She set down her pizza, suddenly not in the mood for this.

“I should go help the guys turn out horses,” she said.

“I've got a better idea. Let's go for a walk—just the two of us.” Fitz gave her arm a squeeze. “What do you say?”

Kate hesitated, glancing up into his playful hazel eyes. Seeing the way he was looking at her made her shiver without really knowing why. She flashed back to their picnic again—and then to that night in the hay stall. He'd been so sweet since then, so eager to make it up to her. Was he for real?

Whatever. Tommi and the others might think she was naive, but Kate couldn't help believing—or was it hoping?—that Fitz was sincere. That he actually thought she was something special.

“Okay, I guess,” she said. “But I can't hang out for long. I mean it this time.”

He smiled, grabbed her hand, and pulled her out of the room. Kate was pretty sure she saw Tommi glance at them as they left, but the others didn't seem to notice their departure. Good.

Fitz led her down the aisle and around the corner into the feed room. Then he dropped her hand, took her by the shoulders, and gently turned her to face him.

“This is more like it,” he said. “Come here.”

He pulled her in for a kiss. Kate sank into him, feeling the tension seep out of her body again. For a second she forgot about everything else as their mouths explored each other.

Then she felt his hands start to wander. “Hey,” she said softly, pulling away and pushing his hands back where they belonged.

“Sorry,” he said in a low, husky voice, a sheepish smile playing on his lips as he pulled her close again. “Force of habit. I'll be good—I swear.”

To her surprise, he was. At least mostly. A couple of times things started to get more intense, but he always pulled back before it got uncomfortable. For a while Kate drifted along in a pleasant haze, letting what was happening between them happen; not thinking, just feeling.

Then some small part of her mind started to wonder: How long was he going to be happy with things the way they were? He'd put it all on the line for her, risked his parents' wrath and Jamie's, just to show he was sorry for pushing too hard that night. Didn't she owe him more than this? Wasn't he going to expect more sooner or later, or could he possibly mean it when he said he'd do anything to be with her?

She started to get that sour feeling in the pit of her stomach again. The same one she'd had the other night while talking to her dad after the big blowup. The same one that had attacked her at the show when she'd seen Jamie waiting at the gate for her after that eq round. Why did they all keep trying so hard, believing she could be what they wanted her to be, when she couldn't seem to live up to any of it?

Her body tensed. Fitz felt it and pulled back. He put one finger under her chin, tilting her face up so he could look into her eyes.

“What?” he whispered. “You seem kind of—I don't know, like you're spacing out all of a sudden. You getting tired of me already?”

His words were light, but she saw real doubt in his eyes. She shook her head.

“Sorry,” she said. “It's not you at all. Guess I'm just distracted.”

“By what?”

She shrugged, not sure what to say.

“Come on, Kate.” He caressed her cheekbone lightly with one finger. “You can trust me.”

She hesitated. Could she? She felt really close to him right now—as close as she'd felt to anyone in a long time. But how could someone like him ever understand what she was going through? Fitz sailed through life like he owned the world. Which his family pretty much did, come to think of it. He couldn't know what it was like to be her, to have her family, her problems. Her life.

He was still staring at her. Waiting. She had to tell him something.

“It's just—uh, my friend Natalie,” she blurted out without really thinking, just latching on to the first thing she could think of that didn't directly involve him or the barn. “Um, we've been, you know, kind of drifting apart lately, and now she invited me out to her barn on Saturday.”

“Wait. You mean that lesson barn where you first learned to ride?” he asked. “Happy something, right?”

She nodded, a little surprised that he remembered. “Yeah. Happy Acres. They're having a show, and Nat's all excited about some new project horse she's working with, and, well, I guess I'm just a little nervous about going back there.”

Fitz smiled, his finger tracing the outline of her chin. “Dr. Hall's got the perfect solution to your problem,” he said. “I'll come with. You know, like for moral support.”

“What?” Kate blurted out in surprise. “Wait, you don't have to do that. It's just a dinky little beginner-type schooling show, and I'm sure you have better stuff to do on Saturday.”

“Nothing better than spending the day with my favorite girl.” Fitz shrugged. “Besides, it'll be fun. Jamie's always telling us to observe other riders and stuff, right?”

Kate wasn't sure the Happy Acres show was quite what Jamie had in mind. Still, what could she say?

“Um, okay, if you're sure—” she began.

“Sure I'm sure.” Fitz grinned down at her. “It's a date.”

Kate smiled back weakly, trying not to imagine what Nat was going to say when she showed up with Fitz. Talk about worlds colliding …

At 10:30 a.m. on a Friday, the Upper East Side bistro was sleepy and quiet. That suited Tommi just fine. She and Alex had the place to themselves except for a trio of old ladies gossiping over tea and a harried-looking young nanny with a couple of little kids in strollers.

“I'm glad this worked out,” Tommi said, reaching for the salt.

Alex looked extra adorable that day in a button-down shirt and loosely knotted funky vintage tie. “Me too,” he said. “It almost makes coming into the city to see my great-aunt Koo-Koo—I mean Kiku—bearable.” He raised one eyebrow. “Sure you don't want to come along and meet her?”

“Tempting. But can't.” Tommi shrugged. “Like I said, I'm heading out to the barn after this.”

“Bummer for me. You have a riding lesson or something?” He grinned. “By the way, how come you still have to take so many lessons? I thought you already knew how to ride.”

She rolled her eyes. “Yeah, I never heard
that
one before.”

They both laughed. Tommi was finding that she laughed a lot when she was with Alex. She liked that.

“Anyway, for your information, there's no lesson today,” she said. “Our group lesson is almost always on Tuesday, and I'll probably do a private with Joy tomorrow.”

“Cool. So on Tuesdays you ride with all the other people your age, right? Like Zac Trask's daughter and all of them?”

“Yeah. There are about seven of us who usually ride together.” Tommi took a sip of her iced tea. “It's fun to hear their feedback and watch how other people handle stuff. Like, this week we worked on this cool exercise where we had to take three jumps on a serpentine, and one of the girls—Marissa—was having trouble with her horse bulging out on the turns, and she got a little rattled.”

She glanced over at Alex, expecting him to look bored. But he'd actually put down his fork to listen. “I get it,” he said. “So you can watch the others ride and figure out how to deal yourself when it's your turn. So how'd your horse do? Were you riding that one you're trying to sell? You said he can be hard to steer when he's excited.”

Tommi was impressed. So he
had
been listening to her all this time—not just faking interest to win her over.

“Actually, I didn't ride Legs this time. I still wasn't sure he was totally back to normal and didn't want to take any chances, so I rode Toccata. He's my junior hunter—he's awesome.” She smiled, remembering how it had felt to just relax and let her horse do his job. “I'm kind of glad I rode him in the lesson. I'd almost forgotten how fun and easy it can be, you know? Just
riding, doing your thing, without worrying about whether you're screwing up his training, or how you're ever going to sell him when you can't even get him to pick up his right lead or whatever.”

Alex nodded. “Makes sense,” he said. “It's like me just jamming with my friends in somebody's spare room versus trying to put together an actual demo tape or something.”

“Exactly. Not that I'm not complaining,” Tommi added quickly. “Legs is great. It's just sometimes nice to remind myself why I want to do this in the first place.”