My Addiction: Second Chances Series (11 page)

I walked out of the kitchen. “Yup… I know it. Oh and I left the dishes for you.”

“Let me ask you this before you go and waste your life.”

I stopped and turned to face him, arms folded over my chest.

“Did you ever fully give Nora a chance to be better than Ayana? You said it yourself you wanted her to be for you what Ayana was and she couldn’t do it. Did you ever stop to think that maybe Nora was what you needed and still is? Clearly, Ayana isn’t for you. She’s toxic, Brad. If you think about it, she has only brought you pain. Has Nora been that for you? Why don’t you think about that before you just completely give up on a life that has been good for you?”

I shook my head. If I was thinking logically, I might have agreed with him, but I’m not. I’m all kinds of mixed up in a woman.

I sighed. “Let me ask you a question, do you regret the time you spent with MJ?” My brother instantly started shaking his head.

“It’s not the same,” he replied.

“No, it’s the same brother. Look, Nora is a great woman. She is. She’s just not great for me. I don’t want to live my life bored half out of my mind when I get home. I don’t want to be a robot with no love, emotion, and desire in my life. That’s what it was like for me, and I’m not going to marry into anything that makes me that unhappy.”

“So you’d rather be with a junkie?”

I felt my temper starting to get the better of me, which I will explain sort of causes me to do things or say things that I normally wouldn’t do or say. It’s my alter ego that sometimes comes out when I feel threatened and cornered, sort of like what happened to Roger and his friends. My brother is fully aware of how volatile I could be. The potential was there I assure you, but I managed to always keep a lid on it… but the preverbal lid was starting to lift.

I took a few deep breaths while closing my eyes, missing everything else my brother said to me. I was counting to ten in my head.

Get it under control, Mills.

When I opened my eyes, I looked at my brother who was studying me closely.

I said to him, voice filled with the rage within me. “Call her that shit again and, I swear to God, you and I will have more than just fucking words! I’ve never known you to be this cold and judgmental, considering how messed up you are. I’m blown away.” He was about to speak, but I held up my hand. “I’m not saying Ayana didn’t have issues in the past. I’m not knocking that something is going on with her now, but I care enough about her to give her this chance. I’m in love with her, Lock. I need every bit of her, and I can’t explain what she does to me to you because there’s no way you can relate. You’re so gone over MJ that you can’t see shit. Maybe one day you will get it. I just hope we are still speaking when you do.”

As I turned to walk into my bedroom that sliver of doubt crept in my mind. What if this shit doesn’t work out with Ayana? What the hell am I going to do? What if my brother’s right and shit continues to be messed up with her? Maybe I did need normalcy, and I just needed to deal with it. It’s a strong possibility I was going down this road only to end up back where I started… with Nora.

I shook my head. That couldn’t be in the cards for me. I would not settle. What I needed was to look Ayana in her eyes and let her know exactly what’s at stake here.

I heard my phone ringing in the dining room, and I moved quickly to get it. My brother was silently putting the last few dishes away when I entered the room. I grabbed my phone and answered it quickly.

“Dr. Mills,” I answered hoping I didn’t miss my call. I’d been waiting for a call for weeks now, and I was hoping this was it.

“Dr. Mills, glad I caught you, I finally found some time to make this call. I’m Dr. Andrew Strauss, the head of Cardiology for Baytown University Medical Center.”

“Yes sir.” Because hell that’s what you say to a man like Dr. Andrew Strauss. He’s one of the top surgeons in my field throughout the country, behind my mentor.

“Ben contacted me a few nights ago. Said one of his top students was leaving him and needed a place to finish his fellowship in my city.”

“Yes, sir. Would you be able to assist in helping me find something?” I asked, hoping he would say yes. Cardiology is a tough science to get into and very competitive. It’s all about who you know, and I was thankful to know some really important people.

“Well, son, I would need to formally meet you and discuss some things. However, based off of Ben, some of the case studies you worked on, and your level of work, I think I can help indeed.”

“Sir, that’s good news,” I smiled. “Whenever you’re available, I would be happy to meet with you.”

“Well, let’s see… I have some free time in about an hour, then I have to scrub up to do an angioplasty for a friend of mine. Why don’t you come down so we can talk? Afterwards, you can scrub up with me.”

My eyes grew as if Magic Johnson just asked me to play a pickup game with him. This was a huge honor.

“Yes, sir. I’ll be happy to.”

“Fine. Here is where you need to go and when you get to the nurses’ station, just tell them you’re here for me.” I wrote down the address Dr Strauss read off to me, hoping this would be the start of a chapter in my life.

“Yes, sir. Thank you for the time and opportunity,” I replied, then hung up and smiled.

“What’s that all about?” I turned to find my brother frowning looking at me.

I clapped my hands. “That, my brother, is karma. I reached out to my mentor on finding me a job here in Dallas.”

“You what?”

I nodded. “Yes, and he’s come through for me with one of the top surgeons in my field. And to top it off, Dr. Strauss just asked me to scrub up with him for a routine surgery that he typically doesn’t do.” I shook my head. “Shit, I need to get going. See you later.” I walked back into my room quickly to get dressed.

Lock

He made sure the coast was clear before he took out his phone, found the number he wanted and hit the call button.

It rang a few times before she answered.

“Hello,” her voice breathed.

“Yeah, it’s me,” he said into the phone, keeping his eyes on the back bedroom door.

“Hold on a second.” He heard her muffled sounds, then she came back. “Okay, what’s going on? Is he still seeing her?”

“Yes, and you better get here sooner rather than later.”

“Why?”

“You’re losing him. He’s looking to find a job here.”

“What?! Can’t you do something?!”

“What the fuck do you want me to do?” Realizing his voice was elevated, he lowered it quickly and repeated, “What do you think I can do?”

“I don’t know. You’re the police. Can’t you arrest her or something? She was on drugs before; plant some on her. Show him she’s not good for him. At least until I get there.”

Lock closed his eyes. He should’ve never opened Pandora’s Box. “Look, I will not plant anything on anyone.”

He heard laughter in his ear. “Oh, please, like you haven’t done it before.”

Lock could feel his patience fleeting. “Lady, I’m about two seconds from hanging up on you after you kiss my fucking ass.”

“Okay, okay! Sorry. Sheesh... Braddock said you were some tough guy and here you are really in your feelings right now. Look can you do something? You said she’s into something. Follow her. See what she’s up to. At least until I can get there, then I can take care of everything on my own.”

Lock sighed deeply. If he wanted his brother free of Ayana, he had to make sacrifices and this was one of them. “Okay, I’ll do what I can from my end, but you get your ass up here, and fast.”

“Yeah, yeah. I’m working on it.”

The sound of her nose cracking along my knee vibrated through me, but I didn’t feel remorse. This bitch deserved everything I was giving her. I grabbed her by her hair, spun, then grabbed her underneath her chin and twisted her over my back so she would land on the ground hard. She was barely moving and I resisted the urge to stomp her face.

The things I saw this girl do to other young girls the last two days sickened me. She was ruthless, she was cruel and it was completely unnecessary. Everyone here could see she had an abundance of talent. She could fight, and her skills were so much better than her opponents were. But she took it to the extreme. She could have brought these girls down quickly with a knockout or put them to sleep. Instead, she tortured them, dragged their beating on for no reason. Was she trying to make a point? I don’t know… but I know I’m definitely making a point right now.

She tried to get up, and my fist flew right to her chin, knocking her back down and out. I saw her chest moving, so I know I didn’t kill her, but I knew she was hurt pretty bad. I breathed deeply trying to calm myself down. I was keyed up. I looked around at the crowd and seeing them with their fists in the air chanting my name made my stomach churn. But it was my own fault. I lost control. The fury that I felt deep in me threatened to take over.

I saw Ramone off in the corner, and I hoped he was making progress with this case. I was getting tired of doing this. I got them where they needed to be, and he promised me that we would only do a few fights. A few fights turned into six, two a night once a week. I’m currently undefeated, and so far, the fights I’d won weren’t too difficult to do. As I mentioned, I was trained very well, so maybe these girls were good or, hell, maybe even great. Nevertheless, there’s only a few of us that seem to be the best fighters here, and I just knocked down one of us, so that left two.

Ramone came over to me smiling. “Girl, you were unbelievable.”

I nodded, and as I turned my head, I saw the man that nearly killed Noelle. I turned back and looked at Ramone. “That’s him.”

“Huh?”

“You idiot, that’s the guy that hurt Noelle and killed that other girl.” His eyes followed my sight, and he watched the big man walk around the makeshift ring. There were a couple of muscle type guys behind him, then a tall, thin Latin man with a white linen pants and sky blue shirt walked behind with two women on his arm.

“That must be Santos,” I said.

“Shhh… keep your fucking voice down,” he chided.

I looked at him closely and saw that beads of sweat had formed on his top lip. This guy was nervous. I mean, I was nervous too considering, but he shouldn’t be. He’s a fed for Christ sake.

“Ramone,” I called to him.

He didn’t look at me. Instead, he eyed the man in the linen outfit until he sat down. I noticed one of the guys that Ramone was speaking with earlier lean into the drug lord and as he talked the man’s eyes fell on me.

Shit!

I couldn’t move under his scrutiny. He looked me up and down, then a sleazy grin came on his face. I shivered and turned my eyes from him. “Please tell me this is my last fight. This has been one fight too many. I’m getting nervous someone is going to find out what’s going on.”

“No one’s going to find out. Calm down.” He looked down at me. “You just do what you’re told. We are almost at the finish line.”

I looked deep into his eyes, and I didn’t like what I saw. I’ve seen it before in my brother’s eyes a lot. It was greed. He licked his lips and tried to act normal, but I could see his eyes travel back to Santos.
Something is going on here that’s not right. I can feel it.
I think I’m going to have to make my own way out and fast.

“Rocket…” I heard someone call, and I looked in that direction. The person that Ramone was speaking to earlier was looking in our direction.

Ramone nodded, and I looked up at him.
Rocket? Really?
I told you I hated this motherfucker, right?

“I’ll be back,” he said to me.

“Yeah, well I’m gone.”

He suddenly gripped my arm tight and moved me close to him. My eyes were wide from surprise and fear. It was something about that look in his eyes.

“Listen to me; you will stay right here, do you understand?”

Shit, he is pissed.
I just nodded my reply. He let me go and stepped back. “Good, I’ll be right back.” He fixed his tie, straightened his jacket and plastered a huge smile on his face as he walked toward Santos and his men.

As I watched him interact with Santos, laughing and busting it up like they were the best of buddies, I realized first I needed to find a better place for Noelle, then I needed to figure a way to get a hold of Martins. I don’t think this is a sting operation anymore. This felt more as if… my life was in danger.

Ramone finally headed my way and again I felt Santos’ eyes on me. Santos was an attractive man, for a drug-dealing psychopath. He was tall and lean and seemed like he had a great body underneath his clothes. His hair was black and kept close to his head with skin that seemed like he lived in the sun twenty-four seven. On the surface, he looked like a very friendly man, but from here, I could see the danger engraved in his eyes. He wasn’t a man to be trifled with, and we were doing just that.

Ramone looked like he was in over his head. When he got to me, I could see he was sweating again over his upper lip, forehead and under his arms. I bet Santos could smell the fear drifting off him. I know I smelled something from him that definitely made my stomach churn.

“Baby Doll, you have definitely hit the jackpot. Santos heard all about you. He actually came to see you fight. And get this; he said he was so impressed with you. He wants to buy you from me.”

My eyes grew. “No, Ramone! What the hell-”

He placed his hands up. “Just calm down. Hold on a second…”

I leaned into him. “Don’t tell me to calm the hell down. You just told me that a drug cartel kingpin has just offered to buy me…
Buy me
! I’m not for fucking sale. Hell, I shouldn’t be here to begin with. You need to call Martins…”

Ramone, eyes blazing red with rage, gripped me by my throat and squeezed. Of course, I panicked and grabbed at his wrists. “You listen to me, you bitch!” he spat. “I will walk right over there and tell them you’re the one that took their precious girl. I’ll then take them directly to her. I’m sure they would reward me handsomely for the find.”

Shit… I’m in trouble.

“What you better do is act like you have some sense. Don’t fucking embarrass me and everything will be fine.” He finally released me, and I doubled over trying to catch my breath and resisted the urge to kick him in his nuts. “You just have to fight in a few more bouts, okay? Just a few more. Everything is falling into place. We want him to want you. Martins is completely on board. You don’t have to worry about that.”

I stood up still coughing and moved back from him slightly. He was losing it completely.

He went to touch me, and I backed up, again, not wanting his hands on me ever.

“Look, I’m sorry about all that. I just need you to be on board, okay?”

I cleared my throat and said softly, “Yeah okay… Can I go now?”

“Actually, no, they want to see you in one more fight. You think you can give them a show?” He smiled at me, and if my throat weren’t on fire, I would have gagged.

But I just nodded, and his smile grew even more.

*****

Soaking in my bathtub to placate my body with a bottle of wine to ease my mind had become a ritual. The
My Life
CD by Mary J played on repeat, seducing my ears with her pain, something I could definitely relate to right now. I closed my eyes and tried to take a few deep breaths. Things were getting harder and harder for me. I wasn’t sure I could last. I was in something so deep, and I had no clue how to get out. The last fight Ramone asked me to stay was with someone that Santos had brought with him, a black girl that had some skills. She got a few good hits on me, which is why I was trying to soak the pain away.

The fight lasted longer than I had anticipated. I tried to give a good show, but I was tired and sore, and I just wanted out of there fast. I didn’t trust Santos, and I was beginning not to trust Ramone, not that I trusted him much before. I didn’t think he was working for the Feds anymore, and that was the scariest thing for me. I didn’t know how long I had before he spilled the beans for his own selfish gain. It’s possible that he had already blown the whistle about Noelle. I needed to move her, but I didn’t have a clue on how to do it or where to take her. I needed help but didn’t know who to turn to.

My mind shifted slightly to Bradley. It was torture leaving him in the middle of the night. Being with him at the House of Blues had been amazing. All we did was talk and listen to music, and enjoyed each other like we used to do. I hated hearing my cell go off, and I hated having to get out of bed in the wee hours of the night. I know Brad was not going to let this happen for very long. He wasn’t going to continue to let me leave in the middle of the night without explanation. I just couldn’t get up the nerve to tell him what was happening.

Maybe I’m completely over my head with both the Feds and Brad. Maybe I should just let him be. Maybe I should…

Bang! Bang! Bang!

I looked out my bathroom door and wished instantly that I had my mom’s gun in there with me instead of in my nightstand.

The knocking started up again, urgently this time, and I thought it could have been Noelle.

I stood from my bath and climbed out. I tried to at least dry my legs quickly before I grabbed my knee length robe and headed to my door.

“Yes?”

“Ayana, open the door,” I heard Brad say.

I looked over at my microwave and saw it was about 1:30 in the morning.

Brad started knocking again.

I wrapped my robe tighter and opened the door.

“Is everything okay?” I had asked him as he whirled passed me. I locked the door behind him then slowly turned around.

The moment I turned, he brought his hands to my face and kissed me. I kissed him back of course, but I didn’t move my hand from the doorknob. Hell, I needed the doorknob for leverage. He attacked ravenously using his beautiful lips as his weapons.

When he parted, he looked heavily in my eyes. “I know it’s late,” he said softly. “But so much has happened today. I needed to see you.”

He brought his hand to the back of my hair and pulled my tie away, letting my hair fall. He then ran his hands through, seemingly entranced in the movement of his hands or the way my hair fell away in his touch.

“What’s going on?” I asked him, trying to bring him back to me.

He took a deep breath and smiled. “I called my boss back in Houston and told him I was thinking about relocating back home.”

I inhaled sharply. I know I probably looked as scared and excited as I felt because his smiled deepened.

“I had asked if he knew of a good hospital where I could possibly complete my fellowship and be under a good surgeon. Well, my boss, my mentor, actually called one of the top cardio surgeons in Dallas and that surgeon called me today asking to meet and talk. I thought he would be a great person to help me, a contact that could get me in somewhere within the city. Baby, he was more than that. He actually asked me to scrub in with him on a routine surgery that actually turned into me spending the entire day with the man. There were two emergency cases that came in and the patients needed open-heart surgeries in both. He asked me to scrub with him for both of those. I mean, baby, I was wrist deep in blood and guts with this man and at the end of the day, he offered me the fellowship.”

“Bradley…” I whispered and smiled, tears filling my eyes. He seemed so excited and charged that I couldn’t help but feel his excitement.

He nodded his head. “Everything is coming together, which is why I’m here. I came straight from the hospital because I need to know something, Ayana.”

He moved closer to me, and I felt my door instantly at my back.

“What?” I asked in a voice that didn’t seem like my own.

Hands still on the sides of my face, he caressed my cheeks with his thumbs. “Point blank Ana, baby, I need to know if this is truly what you want. Is what you said to me last night true, that you want to give yourself to me because baby you’re what I want. You’ve always been who I’ve wanted, who I’ve dreamed about having in my life, in my corner. I just I need to be sure. I can’t go through the bullshit again, Ayana. If I’m what you want…”

I couldn’t take it anymore. I reached my hands in his hair, moved to the tips of my toes and brought his lips crashing on mine. I kissed him hungrily but starved at the same time. I needed to feed off him because I knew if I didn’t have him, I’d die.

Our tongues danced and caressed each other, feeding a desire in me only he could, making me lose my mind in the only way he could. I broke our kiss only to whisper to his lips. “I love you, Bradley.”

He moved back from me and looked intently into my eyes, searching, watching for the truth, and I hope he saw it. I hope he felt it in my touch, in my kiss. I’ve never wanted any man more than I’ve wanted him. Hell, I’ve never wanted any other man period. I didn’t know if he knew that or not, but I would do my best to make sure he did and that he never forgets it. All feelings of doubt kissed away, I wanted my man.