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Authors: Wanda Degolier

BOOK: Mustard on Top
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By lamplight, she examined the court transcripts, newspaper articles, and letters from the US Marshal Service marked
classified.

Helen paused at a black-and-white photo showing a throng of people outside a courthouse. Shot from above, it captured the tops of peoples’ heads. In the center, amid the sea of video cameras and microphones, Ben stared up. Gone was the cocky, smug athlete. In his place was a wide eyed, gaping young man overtaken by terror. Ben looked as if he expected to by gunned down.

Ben had only been a few months older than Theo at the time the photo was snapped.

Helen set the paper down and exhaled a breath she’d been holding. What was the point of  going through anymore? The photo convinced her of Ben’s honesty.

Regardless, that didn’t make telling Theo easier.

She pushed the papers aside and turned out the light. Sleep evaded her. When the vision of her home burning didn’t command her attention, she dredged up every memory she had of Ben.

Helen waited until 6:30 a.m. to go to the kitchen and was surprised to find Agatha seated at the table. As Helen poured herself a cup of coffee, Agatha brought up Hot Diggitys. Helen held up her hand while shaking her head. Without a word, she retreated to the laundry room, gathered her clothes, and returned to the bedroom and dressed. Lying atop the bed, she waited for Theo to wake up.

Helen awoke to the sound of Theo’s voice and checked the clock. It was 9:45 a.m. She bolted off the bed. Hot Diggitys opened in an hour and fifteen minutes, and she was already late. Her mind was a flurry of lists. She hurried to the office and found Agatha sitting at the desk.

“Can I use your phone?” she asked Agatha.

“Sure, but I already covered your shift and Theo’s too. You can relax.”

“What?” Helen’s slumped into the chair. “Thank you. I’ve got a million things to do today.”

“When are you going to get a cell phone?” Agatha asked.

Helen blew out a breath. “I’ve survived this long without one.” Helen heard Theo laugh across the hall and she glanced at the door. It was time to have
the talk
. She pushed out of the chair. “I’ll be back.”

Theo’s door was open, and he stood silhouetted in the window clutching his cell phone to his ear. Helen knocked, and he spun to face her. “Hey Mom.”

“Can we talk when you get off the phone?” Her words sounded warped as if her dread were squeezing the life out of them.

His eyes widened. “I need to call you back later. Bye.” He snapped his cell shut.

“You didn’t need to do that.” Helen’s shoulders sagged as she went to the chair and sat.

“What’s wrong?” Theo plopped on the side of the bed and gawked at her.

At first, Helen couldn’t find her voice. Words, piled one atop another, lodged in her throat. “Turns out your father
is
alive. He wants to meet you.”

Theo cocked his head to the side and studied her. “You been smoking something?”

“This isn’t a joke.”

“Huh.” He paused. “Seems like one because my mother told me, oh maybe a hundred times, my dad was dead.”

Helen resisted the urge to squeeze the bridge of her nose. “I know. I–I assumed he was.”

“Assumed? You said he died in a car crash. That he was in his 1960 Corvair. You told me a semi driver fell asleep and crossed into my dad’s lane. You said that more than once.”

Helen tried to take a deep breath, but her chest felt squeezed as if it were in a vise. “You wanted details. I made all that up. I—” The truth hurt, and her breathing was quick and shallow. “I’m sorry.”

When Theo’s eyes hardened, her heart splintered, and her anger toward Ben blazed. He should have found a way to communicate. What was she supposed to tell her child?
Their child.
“He’d disappeared without a trace. He was in a—”

“How long has he wanted to meet me?” Theo interrupted.

“I talked to him for the first time in eighteen years last night. I was with him when the fire started.”

Theo narrowed his eyes then his gaze dropped to his hands. “If he hasn’t bothered to show up until now, I don’t think I need to meet him.”

She didn’t want to rally on Ben’s behalf, but thought Theo deserved an explanation other than his father didn’t care. She offered the package Ben had delivered the night before. “There’s information in here that will tell you everything that happened.”

Theo dismissed the envelope, and Helen dropped it back in her lap.

“Right after I became pregnant, he witnessed a horrific crime. After he agreed to testify, the US Marshal Service changed his identity and moved him around the country for his protection.”

“So his name’s not Harvey?”

Helen winced. “No. His name is Ben Smiley. Or was. Now he calls himself Cooper Manning.”

“Cooper?” Theo sounded disgusted.

Helen laughed nervously. “Yeah.” After a moment, she said, “You don’t have to meet him. He’s only out here on vacation, he’ll be gone soon enough.”

“Where does he live?”

“Chicago. Theo, I swear I didn’t know any of this until last night.”

“So that’s from him?” Theo nodded toward the envelope.

“He’s from Nalley. We were high school sweethearts, but he resides in Chicago now.” Helen held the package toward Theo, who eyed it warily.

“Go through it with me?” he asked.

That Theo had included her, mended Helen’s heart a little.

“Of course.” Shaky, she stood and moved toward the bed. A few deep breaths helped her gain her composure before she sat.

It took two hours, but together they went through the articles. Theo seemed to absorb the idea of Ben’s existence and his anger dissipated. Helen’s pride swelled, Theo handled the news well. Theo laid the last article in the stack aside and announced, “I’m hungry.”

“Shall we go out for pizza?”

“Have you taken your insulin?”

Helen cringed. “I will right now.”

“Afterward, we can go out for pizza,” Theo said. “Hey aren’t you supposed to be at work?”

“Both our shifts are covered.” Helen stood and kissed him on the top of the head. “What would I do without you?”

She was halfway to the door when Theo called, “Mom?”

“Yes?”

“You can tell Harvey, er, Ben that I’ll meet him tomorrow morning. Before work.”

****

At 9:30 a.m., Ben sat on the designated brown, wooden bench where Theo had agreed to meet him. The boardwalk, the sight, sound, and smell of the ocean, the people running or walking their dogs conjured long forgotten memories.

His knee bounced in time with his jumbled nerves. Years of being a trial lawyer had taught him to hide his emotions, yet meeting his son for the first time proved harder than he’d imagined.

Leaning forward, he stared down the boardwalk in the direction he assumed Theo would come. Like a teenage girl, he’d fussed over his clothes that morning before settling on a short-sleeved, navy-blue, polo shirt, and fawn-colored Dockers.

When he spotted Theo coming toward him, he stretched his face into something he hoped looked welcoming and stood. Theo’s gait slowed, and Ben stepped closer then forced himself to wait. He wanted Theo comfortable.

Ben tried not to gawk, but he’d only glimpsed Theo the night before. With dark, wavy hair, big brown eyes, and a square chin, Theo was a younger version of himself.

“Hi Theo,” Ben said as soon as he was close enough.

Theo jammed his hands in the pockets of his loose-fitting jeans. “So you’re my dad I guess.”

“Yes.” Tense silence stretched between them, and Ben wished he knew the perfect thing to say. “You look like me.”

When Theo’s gaze skittered to the water, Ben fretted. He was amazed at how much he wanted this boyish man, his son, to like him.

“I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you,” Ben said.

Theo puckered his lips and glanced over his shoulder toward Hot Diggitys. He worried Theo intended to leave. Ben was eager to prove he hadn’t abandoned Theo completely, and that he and Helen had been in his thoughts. “This morning I found out where the money went, the Marshal Service has been sending it to your grandma in Florida.”

As soon as he spoke, Ben wished he could retract the words. He’d intended to break the news to Helen in private the next time they met.

“Huh? What money?”

Obviously, Helen hadn’t told Theo about the payments. He seemed to be the only one fixated on them. Ben clung to the notion that his sending money changed everything. It didn’t. “Never mind. Do you like living in Nalley?”

Theo shrugged. “I read the papers you sent last night. So, you’re in some kind of witness protection thing?”

“I was. Have you eaten breakfast? We could go out if you like.”

“My shift starts in a half-hour.”

Ben’s tried not to look disappointed. A half-hour. What had he expected? “Where do you work?”

“At Hot Diggitys with Mom.”

“Oh.” Ben hoped his disappointment at learning both Helen and Theo worked at the goofy, hot dog-shaped, fast-food restaurant didn’t show on his face. He’d imagined Helen as more ambitious and certainly more capable than working at a hot dog stand.

In truth, he’d been shocked upon seeing Helen’s transformation from a calm, quiet teenager, to a strong and stunningly beautiful woman. Oddly, she didn’t have any of the coquettish gestures so common to attractive women. Sidetracking the topic of employment, Ben said. “Agatha told me you were working on a car in the garage when the fire started. Can I ask what it is?”

Theo’s posture loosened. “An ‘82 Corvette.” He smiled.

Ben’s heart seized in his chest. “Nice. Which model?”

“A 350 Crossfire.”

Ben raised his eyebrows. “Excellent.”

“She’s a four-speed.”

Ben whistled. “I never understood why they put automatic transmissions in those.”

“Me neither.”

“What color is she?” Ben asked.

“Green with black interior.”

“Ah. I remember when I was your age. I lived to drive my ‘61 Corvair. She was a four-speed too.”

Theo’s eyes flashed an unreadable emotion. “You had a ‘61 Corvair?”

“She was baby blue, and I called her—” Ben looked around as if he were about to bestow a national secret, “—you can’t tell anyone this, not even your mom, okay?”

“Sure.” Theo leaned closer.

“Venus.”

“Like the planet?”

“No. Venus, the Goddess of Love.” Ben smiled remembering his fondness for the car. “Does your ‘Vette have a name?”

“Don’t want to get too close to her. I’m planning on selling her once I’m done fixing her up.”

“Ah.”
Good hobby,
Ben thought. Expensive hobby.

“Actually,” Theo hesitated, “I call her Matty.”

“Matty?”

Theo studied at his feet. “My first girlfriend when I was in the sixth grade. Well, not even my girlfriend. I just had a crush on her, and then her family moved away.” He glanced up.

“A tribute then?”

“Nothing that deep. I figured this car will move away too. Kind of works.”

“So you like fixing up classic cars?”

“Yeah. I want to turn it into a business. I think I could be an entrepreneur like Mom.”

“Like your mom?”

“She owns Hot Diggitys.” Theo smiled.

A spike of shame for his earlier judgment humbled Ben. Entrepreneur fit. “I didn’t realize.”

“Yep.”

Ben wished he could stop his mental missteps. “How’s Matty run?”

“She doesn’t. Not yet anyway. I rescued her from the junkyard for fifty bucks. Her body’s in decent shape, but the engine was blown. I’ve been replacing parts, but haven’t had any luck. I’m rebuilding the starter on Monday.”

“Impressive undertaking.”

“Thanks.”

Ben wondered if the choice to rebuild versus replace had to do with money. The thought landed him squarely in his guilt minefield.

“Maybe I could help you with her. I’ve got experience working on older cars.”

Theo squinted then shook his head no. “That’s okay.”

“Theo!”

The voice came from behind, and Ben pivoted. A tanned, broad-shouldered man jogged toward them. He wore a white T-shirt with the sleeves cut off and a pair of shiny red shorts. He had well-toned, muscled arms and a layer of sweat glistened on his face.

“Hey Seth,” Theo waved.

Once Seth got closer, he swung a hand out. Theo caught it and shook hardily. Ben’s chest tightened at seeing their friendship and an intense dislike for Seth came over him. Blond-haired and blue-eyed, Ben judged Seth’s age to be close to his own. The man seemed familiar prompting Ben to wonder if they’d gone to high school together.

“Everything okay here?” Seth asked Theo. “You looked a little tense.”

“Fine,” Theo said.

“I’m Ben Smiley.” Ben offered his hand. Using his old name conjured more memories.

Seth gave Ben the once-over as he gripped his hand with more force than necessary. “Seth Drivoul.”

“You seem familiar, but I can’t place you,” Ben said.

Seth grinned. “I played Alex in
After Midnight
.”

“Oh, the TV show?”

Seth nodded.

“That must be it.” Ben didn’t watch much television, but he’d heard of the show.
After Midnight
had been a long-running TV series about teen vampires. It had run over ten years and had a cult-like following. Ben recalled Seth’s face covering the tabloids many years back. He’d fallen from favor for some reason Ben couldn’t recall.

“Seth is full of himself,” Theo teased. “Don’t get him started.”

The easy relationship between Theo and Seth made Ben wonder if Seth was Helen’s boyfriend. The idea curdled the coffee in his stomach.

“Theo’s just jealous,” Seth shot back.

“You’re not acting anymore?” Ben inquired.

“He doesn’t need to,” Theo answered. “Royalties.” Theo rolled his eyes seemingly at ease with Seth.

“Jealous, like I said.” Seth examined his fingernails feigning boredom then he looked at Ben. “I take the occasional acting job, but mostly I lead a life of leisure.”

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