Murder in Gatlinburg (23 page)

I forgot about the
suspects and switched over to the victims. Well, one of them. I didn't remember
Earl's last name, even though I saw it printed on a cardboard slid into a slot
on the bus. I wasn't surprised to find out that Agnes Trueblood didn't have a
Facebook page. I checked out a few other names on Facebook and Googled a few
people, but I was no closer to solving the murders that I wasn't allowed to
solve. 

Time has a way of
rushing by if you waste it. I had no idea it was bedtime until I glanced at my
watch. But it was bedtime. At least it was bedtime for a guy my age who had to
get up before I wanted to the next day in order to go someplace where my mouth
watered each time I thought about it. Even though I had turned over a new leaf.

I was about to give up
on my crime solving when I had some help doing so. My phone vibrated, so I
checked to read my incoming text.

Give it up! Now!

At least I knew that Lou
hadn't gone to bed either, and that he had come to know me quite well over our
fifty or so years together. Sometimes it's comforting to know that your friends
know you well. But sometimes, it isn't.

I awoke Thursday morning
and checked on the time. It wasn't quite 7:00. Harlan would be there to pick us
up at 9:00. Harlan. I hadn't thought to include him on my suspect list until
the day before, but then only briefly. But he seemed like such a nice guy. And
he was the one who identified the body. That did it! Harlan was my guy. Harlan,
who took us into his confidence. I was getting goofy. I needed to think about
something else or I would be getting another text from Lou.

I looked up at the open
blinds. From where my suite was situated it was okay to leave the blinds open,
unless I was afraid the birds would talk. I knew they would only talk to Alfred
Hitchcock and Robert Stroud, and both of them were dead.

It looked like we were
going to have another sunny day. I lay back on my comfortable king-size bed and
enjoyed it a few more minutes. I continued to look out the window and up into
the trees. I wondered how much another week at this place would cost me.
Whatever it was, it would be worth it. Well, within reason. There was so much
that we hadn't done in this land of a thousand attractions. Well, a few of those
things were about to be crossed off our list later that day. And there were a
few more than I couldn't picture myself doing.

And Westgate was classy
enough that I wouldn't mind staying there under house arrest. Well, provided
someone would bring me meals. I still had to eat, even though I don't eat as
much anymore. I know when I go home I'll miss the king-size bed. I'll miss
going out on the balcony, and the leather couch and chair. I will even miss the
kitchen with no food in the refrigerator, a kitchen that I haven't used.

By the time I looked at
my watch again it was 7:23. It was time to get up. I had a decision to make.
Should I shower first or do my Bible study? I opted for showering first,
because I'll be more awake and alert after I step from the shower. And what a
shower it is. The tub is huge. And it even has a second sprayer which feels
like a water massage. Now that I am spoiled, I wonder if I can I get a similar
set-up for my shower back home.

One at a time, I checked
everything off my early morning to do list and then called Lou.

"Lou, you need to
come and get me. The thought police came for me in the middle of the night.
They heard me trying to solve the murders while I slept. They told me that I
only have one phone call and you are it. "

Lou laughed.

"Give it up. You
know you'll never be able to solve a murder without my help. And I don't have
any messages for you today. And if I did, I wouldn't tell you what they
are."

"Just for that,
I'll stab you if you try to eat off my plate at the Pancake Pantry."

"You're the one who
heads for my plate first. Okay, other plates are off limits. If either of us
wants to try something, he has to order it."

"Too bad we didn't
find this place back when we were both eating everything we wanted."

Lou didn't say anything,
but deep down I knew he agreed with me.

+++

We had a busy day ahead
of us, so Lou and I walked downhill to the shuttle stop and rode in the van
down to the lobby. As I rode, I looked over to my right. Maybe Miss Bikini had
opted for coffee instead. At least she wasn't in the pool. Actually, no one was
in the pool. Well, I couldn't see the bottom. There could have been someone
thrown to the bottom, with a huge rock tied to his leg, and maybe a waterproof
note.

When the trolley stopped
I got out and walked into the store off to the side of the lobby and purchased
a pair of sunglasses. That way I could watch all my suspects and Lou wouldn't
be able to tell where I was looking. I forgot that Lou had been hanging around
me long enough that he was pretty smart. My charade didn't work. But at least I
looked more like a cop with them on. I thought it a bit ironic that I looked
more like a cop after I no longer was one.

+++

We took advantage of the
pleasant morning and walked outside to wait on the bus. I even engaged in
conversation with some of the people I trusted the most. The little boy and
girl were in the midst of telling me what all they had done in vacationland
when someone shouted that the bus was coming. It was good that she shouted.
Otherwise I doubt if anyone would have noticed the behemoth pull up and stop
ten feet away. Harlan hadn't been arrested yet and stopped the bus in front of
our growing group at 8:48. Not everyone had made it down yet, but we were only
missing two or three people, who we expected were still among the living. Inez
was one of the missing. Was she dead, a fugitive from justice, or a scared
woman on the run? Harlan didn't try to communicate a message to me as I
boarded. I think he knew I was on to him. You have to be leery of anyone who
doesn't eat with the rest of the group. I thought of him as the bus moved
through the wooded area only to come out in the hamlet of Gatlinburg.

As Harlan drove us to
our destination he informed us about the rest of our day.

"Listen up,
everyone. I won't see you again until 5:30 this evening. In the meantime you
are to eat breakfast at the Pancake Pantry, unless you choose to pay for
breakfast somewhere else. If you eat at the Pancake Pantry, breakfast is
included in the cost of  your trip. After that , you have time to go shopping.
We recommend The Village shops, right next door to the Pancake Pantry. Nothing
you buy at any of the shops is included in the cost of your trip. Remember, you
are responsible for keeping track and lugging around whatever you buy. After
you have finished shopping, there will be four vans parked between the aquarium
and the Mexican restaurant that will transport you until I pick you up this
evening. The main reason for that is that this bus would have trouble navigating
the Roaring Fork Motor Nature Trail, which will be your last stop this
afternoon. As soon as one van is full it will move out to take you to the Craft
Loop, where you will find over one hundred shops, most of which sell items made
by the person who owns the shop. I believe you will be impressed with the
quality of the workmanship. The last van will leave the downtown area at noon, so make sure you leave The Village in time to board that van. While you are on the
Craft Loop you will be stopping for lunch at a British pub. Lunch too is
included in the cost your trip. Any questions?"

The lack of hands or
voices told me that everyone understood or didn't care.

A few minutes later
Harlan stopped traffic and dropped us off in front of the Pancake Pantry. We
left the bus shortly after 9:00, so that gave us almost three hours to stand in
line, eat, and shop. Since no man has ever taken three hours to shop, I could
see our excursion was timed to accommodate the women. I figured I would take
longer to shop that day than I normally do, and I might not make it to the
first van. But I figured the first van would be full of men, and some of them
might be carrying. A weapon, I mean. Not any souvenirs or gifts. I wasn't carrying,
so I hoped to spend my day with a mixed crowd.

The line to get inside
the Pancake Pantry moved forward enough that I was not only inside, but seated
at a table with a menu in my hands, and orange juice and water with lemon on
the table within a few minutes. In a way, I was sad. There were so many items
on the menu that I hadn't tried, and the new Cy wouldn't try all of them that
morning. The old Cy wouldn't either, but he would have tried at least three of
them. And I didn't see myself coming back to Gatlinburg for at least a couple of
weeks. Probably longer. Unless I went home and dreamed of the Pancake Pantry
every night. I reflected on what I had already eaten there; pecan pancakes, and
a veggie omelet. I decided to make my last trip to the Pancake Pantry my best
one and opted for the most expensive item on the menu, Wildberry Crepes, with
five kinds of berries, stuffed with a mixture of ricotta and cream cheese, and
topped with powdered sugar and real whipped cream. And with plenty of syrup to
pour on top. And I added an order of bacon. So Lou wouldn't be tempted to eat
off my plate, he ordered the same. When our orders came and we each took a
bite, Lou and I almost cancelled our bus trip home.

But before I took a
bite, I sent a picture of what we were eating to George, and followed that up
with a text.

Any chance the guys
in the department might spring for another week or two?

A few minutes later I received
a reply.

The guys would do
anything to get rid of you, but Heather is missing you so much. And isn't there
some woman named Jennifer something or other waiting for you?

I laughed and finished
my food. I refrained from picking up my plate and licking it, but I was
tempted.

I looked at my watch. It
was 10:10. We were to go to the shops in The Village next. They were right next
to the Pancake Pantry and Lou and I decided to allow an hour for that place and
ten minutes to walk back to the bus. So, we could sit a little longer at our
table and let our food settle.

I looked around for a
man who might limp, and two guys in sunglasses, who may or may not be wearing
suits. It's harder to tell if someone limps if he is seated, so I checked my
phone and looked at his picture. I scanned the restaurant and no one looked
like my newfound friend. Maybe he had already been arrested. There was no one
wearing sunglasses either, although a few people had sunglasses on the top of
their head. We were far enough into our vacation that I decided not to add
anyone to my suspect list unless I saw them in the process of doing bodily harm
to someone. When this hadn't happened within ten minutes, I motioned to Lou and
we got up and walked out. I thought about begging again for delivery service
and wondered if it would help if I shed a few tears.

+++

I had spent a few days
earlier in the week checking out The Village shops online. I also checked out
the other shops we would hit, and tried to come up with gifts for those left behind.
The trip was set up so that each of us could shop for gifts, or things for
ourselves, on our last two days in the area. Thursday in Gatlinburg and Friday
in Pigeon Forge. The Village was the first of two shopping areas we would hit
that day.

The entire operation was
set up to look like a small park. There were benches to sit on, and brick
walkways to get from shop to shop. Each of the shops had its own entrance and exit,
so Lou and I were in and out of doors several times. Each time we exited a
store I looked around to see if I could see anyone in our group. Sometimes I
did. Sometimes I didn't. But I didn't see anyone strangling the person next to
him or her, or anyone bleeding profusely. If so I assume I was supposed to dial
9-1-1 and then run the other way.

Each of the shops in The
Village specialized in a particular item or group of items. The Village shops
had everything, from olive oil, to socks, to Thomas Kinkade prints. There was a
slight price difference between a pair of socks and one of Kinkade's prints. I
remembered that I left the U-Haul at home, so the Kinkade prints might have to
wait until next time. Not only are socks smaller than prints, but they are more
pliable, too. Prints don't fold as well, but you never lose one in the washer.

Lou and I looked through
all the shops. We picked up a bag full of this and that at The Donut Friar,
selected a few cheeses at The Cheese Cupboard to munch on later, and chose some
non-edible items to take to our friends back home. Each person on our list
would receive a pair of colorful toe socks from The Sock Shop, and a T-shirt
from The Day Hiker that read, "I walked the entire width of the Appalachian Trail." I wondered if everyone would understand the shirt right away. It
might take a while for some people I know. I figured that I might buy another
gift for a certain someone when we arrived at the shops located on the Craft
Loop. I dared Lou to put on his toe socks, but he refused to do so until he was
wearing shorts and sandals. In all my years I don't remember ever seeing Lou in
either a pair of shorts or sandals. I guess God really blessed me in that way.
Lou too, because I'd never worn them either. Of course with Lou and me retiring
and both of us turning over a new leaf, who knows what we might do next.
Imagine the two of us shopping for something other than food or books. I had so
much fun doing something we never do that I almost forgot about my list of
suspects that I couldn't do anything about. When my mind wandered to Jack Ripatoe
and Max Huffington in colorful toe socks, I hit myself on the side of my head
to rid myself of that thought. I shouldn't have done that.