Authors: Shari Richardson
A sob slipped past my lips. Mathias' head jerked up and I turned and ran back to the street, to the swirling mass of humanity that traveled the street unaware of the evil that walked with them. I wondered what color my aura was, how muddy it was for having hurt Mathias so deeply. That he would give up the sun, the one thing he believed kept any part of him human, in penance for the thirst that was beyond his control, was too much for my heart. He thought he didn't deserve me, when in fact I was the one who could never hope to deserve him.
I followed, fear curling in my gut. Xavier had never before looked as he did now. His aura was muddied a bit, and pulsing so much I could physically feel the press of it when I walked beside him.
"The blood sucker went too far today, Mairin," he said. "The pride has decided he has to be taken care of."
"Wait a minute. What the hell are you talking about Xavier? What happened and who the hell is the pride?"
Xavier stopped and threw himself back to lean against the wall of the shop we stood beside. "I didn't tell you all of my story that day I met you at the grocery store. I didn't think you needed to know and when I found out you were going to be working with Gram, I figured you'd bring up my aura and she'd tell you about me."
"Yeah, I know. You're the strangest girl I've ever met, Mairin. Any other girl would have been all over my Gram with questions. You just let it go." He sighed. "Remember when I told you I didn't choose the job of protector but that I wouldn't back away from it?"
"I wish I were. Turns out there were a few other werepanthers in East Hampton. No one knows why we seem to congregate there, but the pride has kind of appointed itself the protectors of the area. We keep the other supernaturals under control. We keep the new wereanimals from infecting others. We keep the passing blood suckers from staying too long or turning anyone. We keep the peace, so to speak."
"I wondered the same thing actually," Xavier said with a laugh. "Gram says it's because you handle the supernatural well. You don't freak out, so the supernaturals are drawn to you."
Xavier sobered. "I don't think it's funny, Mairin. I think it's as sad as a seven year old boy being infected with an incurable disease that makes him furry once a month."
"More than once a month if there's danger. That's what I came to talk to you about actually. Mathias openly threatened two humans today. The pride has decided we have to move before he makes good on those threats."
"No. Xavier, you can't do this." I grabbed his shoulder to keep from falling. "He's not evil, Xavier. He's not even mean. You know I've talked to Elise about him, his aura. He's one of the purest souls you'll ever meet. To take his life would be...would be a sin!"
"You don't get it, Mairin. There's no choice to be made. He threatened humans. The pride takes that seriously and we are sworn to protect humans over supernaturals."
"Wait, who did he threaten?"
"So you and your pride," I spat the word as though it were as filthy as it felt on my tongue. "have decided that good and evil are determined by species and not nature?"
"It sure sounds like it is. I can tell you, in no uncertain terms, that Braden is evil to his core. But according to you, because he's still marginally human, his life is worth more than Mathias'."
"If you want to look at it that way, then yes," Xavier said. His aura was pulsing with anger and I realized I could see the shadowy shape of a cat stalking back and forth amid the orange sparks.
"No, it's not how I look at it, it's how it is. You and your pride, you're all hypocrites. Mathias is the furthest thing from evil in this godforsaken town, but you've condemned him for what he is and what he might do, while Braden has harmed humans, has damn near killed kids on a football field and he lives without your pride threatening to kill him."
Xavier stalked away, leaving me staring stupidly after him. I couldn't let the pride hurt Mathias. I had to get to him before they did and warn him. I ignored my mother's frantic shouts as I dashed past the shop and headed for my car. The very least I could do was warn Mathias and find a way to get him away from Highland Home before this town became his tomb.
I pulled into the drive in front of Mathias' home and knew immediately that something was wrong. The shades were drawn in every window. I knew Mathias, who loved the sun more than anything else in his life, would never close up his house like this unless he were leaving. I'd heard him say he was leaving as he'd stood at Kathryn's grave, but I hadn't believed he leave so quickly. He believed leaving would be the best thing he could do for me, but I'd never believed he'd leave without saying goodbye. Despite having come to the house to send Mathias away, my heart sank. I knew I was too late, that he'd already left.
Unwilling to believe he was gone without proof, I banged on the door until my fists were bruised. I walked around the house to the deck outside the kitchen and peered through the glass wall. It was from there that I could see dust covers thrown over furniture. I could feel the emptiness of the house, the missing vibrancy of Mathias' presence. There could be no doubt about it. he was gone.
I sat on the steps of the deck and watched the waves crash onto the beach. The wind whipped past, leaving me chilled, but I couldn't muster the strength to go back to my car to escape the weather. Mathias had left Highland Home. He'd gone without saying goodbye or giving me the chance to beg him to stay. I'd never have the chance to tell him I was sorry, to tell him that I loved him. He was gone and I was numb.
When the sun sank below the horizon and the wind began to truly howl, I left Mathias' house and headed for home. At least Mathias' leaving meant he was no longer in danger from Xavier and his "pride." I may have lost him due to my own hard-headed refusal to own up to my mistakes, but he would live. I could accept that.
I rounded on my mother's partner. "You know what, Tawnya, I'm sick of your attitude toward Mathias. You don't know him. You don't know what he is like. You've made a judgment based on what he is, not who he is. What if everyone did that?"
Mom looked at me as though I had suddenly grown a third eye. The blood drained from Tawnya's face, leaving her pale and shaking. I knew then that Tawnya hadn't shared the truth about herself with my mom. I could see she feared I would expose her secret.
"It's all right, Loraine," Tawnya said when my mom began to object to my apology. "Mairin is right. I made a judgment of that boy based on something beyond his control and didn't accept Mairin's assessment of him. That was both cruel and unfair."
Tawnya held her hand out to me and I hugged her. Her apology wasn't acceptance of Mathias, but it did make me feel a little better. If an angel could admit she was wrong about a vampire, maybe there was hope for the werepanthers in East Hampton after all.
"I wish I knew what was going on with you, Mairin," Mom said, sitting down next to Tawnya. "Help me understand. Help me help you, honey."
I sighed and sat across from them. "I made a huge mistake last September. I let fear rule me rather than believing in myself. I don't think anyone else can help me, Mom. I missed my chance to make things right and I need to move on."
"Exactly what I just accused Tawnya of," I said. "I didn't have enough faith in Mathias to trust him to do the right thing and now that I know," I looked hard at Tawnya, "without a doubt that he has changed because he knew I couldn't live with is choices, I've lost him. I'm an idiot."
"You're not an idiot," Mom said. "You're a teenaged girl. You're supposed to be unsure and have doubts. I'm sorry that Mathias is gone, but I'm glad you're coming back to us."
"You've always put everyone else ahead of you, Mairin," Tawnya said. "As much as I may not care for Mathias, I'm glad that you finally saw that there are those outside your family who will put your well being ahead of their own."
In my room, I put on my pajamas and curled up on my bed. "I'm so sorry, Mathias," I whispered. "Be happy wherever you've gone to. Live in the sun, my love. My heart, my mourning sun."
Mathias nodded once and stepped on the field. Around him, the night lit up with a dozen bright points of light. Feline eyes followed the movement of both boys, though I could see how they watched Mathias more closely than they did Braden.
"Well, I suppose to be fair, I should tell you that those cats out there plan to tear out your throat if you get the upper hand on me, but they're willing to let us fight it out before they act."
"I guess I also feel kind of bad for that girl of yours especially since I threatened to kidnap her to get you here. I'm willing to get Stephanie to back off if I'm the one who walks off this field tonight. In fact, I'll do one better than that. Steph's a bitch anyway. I'll make sure she leaves your girl and her family alone. I'll protect her, keep her safe until the younger one graduates. But I can't do any of that if I don't win."
"So if I am willing to lay down my life, you will care for Mairin and Kerry?"
"That's the gist of it, blood sucker. This isn't personal. It's business. You're dangerous. You're evil and you've got to go." Braden laughed again. I could see the blackness swirling in his aura. "Well, it's a little personal. I don't like anyone thinking they can take me on without consequence."