Mother Finds a Body (29 page)

“She was like a wild woman,” Hank said. He looked down at the four deep scratches on his hand. “Boy, did she put up a fight.”

“Well,” Mother said, “I hardly blame her for that. Three of you picking on one woman. I think it's disgraceful. And now talking behind her back when she isn't here to defend herself.”

“Defend herself?” Hank said. “Why she's a—”

Mother put up her hand. “Please,” she said. “You've done quite enough. You don't have to become deleterious. I would rather you left us now, I want to be alone with my daughter.”

The sheriff picked up his hat. He looked from Mother to Biff. Biff shrugged his shoulders again, this time hopelessly. The sheriff said goodbye to all of us, then he left.

Mother waited until she heard his car leave, then she turned to me.

“Can you imagine me thinking about marrying at my age?” she said pensively. “It's perfectly silly. Why, I should have my head examined. To think of leaving you and Biff now that you need me.”

Mother went to the window and peered through the glass. “Here comes a car,” she said. “My, we really are having a lot of company tonight.”

“You might go so far as to say we are doing a helluva business,” Gee Gee said.

I thought at first the car was for Joyce, then I heard a girlish giggling.

“Why, it's a little doll house,” a woman's voice squealed.

“What fun to ride all the way to New York in a trailer,” another voice said.

“Look how it hooks onto a car. Isn't that cute! But aren't you afraid to sit back when the car's moving?”

Then I heard Mandy.

“Afraid?” he said loudly. “Of course not. Not with good old Biffola driving. Now here's the front seat I was telling you
about.” He was beginning to sound like a landlord showing off an apartment to a prospective tenant. “You see, there's plenty of room for Millie up here. Now that Corny's not with us anymore I can double up with Biff on the army cot and Clarissima here can bunk with Gee Gee in the bedroom.”

Biff went to the door and opened it slowly. Mandy pulled into the trailer with Millie and Clarissima.

“Look,” he said, shoving the girls under Biff's nose. “I got us a couple new customers. We got it all figured out. We'll go sixes on the expenses. Millie can help with the driving too. They're both on their way east anyway, so I figured as long as we had the room I'd ask 'em to join us.”

“Sure,” Biff said. “Tickled to death to have you.” The words were there but not the music. A tight smile was as far as he went in the personality department.

“I just ran into a guy that said he owned The Blinking Pup,” Mandy was saying. “That guy had the nerve to tell me Dimples and Gee Gee were booked in his joint. I sure told him off. I told him no friends of mine would play a scratch house like that. He even let on like I might want to play it. Me? I'm no saloon actor. I know that now. I just wired the Gaiety and asked them if they could use a slightly used funny boy. That's for me. No more saloons for Mandy Hill!”

Gee Gee and Dimples were showing the girls around the trailer. Mandy followed, explaining the points of interest as they went along.

Mother had begun to wheeze again. Biff poured a small mound of asthma powder into the container lid and touched a match to it. When the flame died down, he reached for a towel and put it over Mother's head.

“Here's where we found the money,” Mandy said. “Joyce is in the bedroom or I'd show you where we found the body.” He had taken over Biff's job of Joe Host and he was working overtime at it.

“Soon as the inquest is over,” he said, “we'll be rolling along. Back to the Gaiety with a quick one-two.”

Mother's breathing became easier. She took the towel from
her head and folded it carefully over the back of her chair.

“My, oh my, that was a bad one,” she said comfortably. Her smile was radiant, “You know, children,” she said, “I've been thinking—”

Biff moaned softly.

“Hold your hats, boys,” he said. “Here we go again.”

GYPSY ROSE LEE
was born Louise Hovick in Seattle, Washington, and became the most famous burlesque actor and striptease artist of her day, renowned as much for her witty repartee on stage as for removing her clothes.

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