Read Monster Hunter Legion-eARC Online
Authors: Larry Correia
Tags: #Urban Life, #Fantasy, #General, #Contemporary, #Fiction
“Good. I’ve got plans. I’m getting my hair done next week.”
“Thanks for not yelling at me for procrastinating murdering my dad to prevent Armageddon.”
“Don’t beat yourself up. We don’t know what’s going on yet, and besides, your dad’s probably delusional.” Julie quickly changed the subject because we both knew he probably wasn’t. “It’s been pretty quiet up here. The only things I’ve seen through the windows down there are people angry about being stuck in quarantine.”
“How can you tell?”
“On twenty power I can’t exactly read lips, but I can certainly read body language. The situation’s getting rowdy in there, which is why I didn’t ask for any more help up here. I figured we needed all the Hunters we could get inside.”
“Speaking of being needed inside…”
“I knew you’d get around to asking that eventually.” Julie knew me far too well. “You want to know why I volunteered to be out here, on lookout duty that anybody else could do, instead of being my usual diplomatic, take-charge self, herding cats downstairs?”
“Pretty much.”
My wife leaned on the railing and watched the barricades. She took a long time answering. “Because I lost my temper and hit that stupid Hunter.”
“Personally, I thought that was awesome.”
“Yeah, you would, Mr. Solves All Problems with Bludgeoning.”
“That’s actually my Indian name. I’m one sixty-fourth Cherokee.”
“You don’t get it. I’m supposed to be the rational one. I’m supposed to be the calm one that makes good decisions. If you lost it on that guy, nobody would’ve been surprised. I’m supposed to be good with people.”
“You do have a bit of a reputation. Julie’s the brains. I’m the one that’s good at lifting heavy things and reaching items on the top shelf.”
“When he accused me of being like my dad…I don’t know. I just…Well, that wasn’t me.”
“Your dad was tricked into doing some awful things. Of course you got mad. You’re only human. One cheap shot deserved another. Dumbass got what he deserved.”
She reached up and rubbed her neck absently. Her voice was so low I could barely hear her over the wind. “Maybe.”
I reached out gently and caught her wrist. “Cut that out.”
She realized what she’d been doing and slowly put her hand back on the railing. “Stupid things…I guess I’m just extra sensitive about doing things out of character. I’m afraid they might, I don’t know,
change
me. They’re not inert. They’ve saved my life, but they’ve never talked to me before.”
“Talked?” That was alarming.
She shrugged. “No words or anything like that, but the marks woke me up. They warned me about the monster’s presence this morning. I could tell they
wanted
me to be ready.”
I didn’t know what to say. “Julie…”
“Look at the timeline. I had to have woken us up the instant the
Nachtmar
appeared. It was like…I don’t know, like it was aware. Like it wanted me to go fight. They’re telling me things now. Are they progressing? Changing?” So far there had only been benefits to the Guardian’s magic, but in this business we had plenty of examples of how
gifts
from the other side worked out, and they seldom ended well.“I don’t know. What does it mean?”
I could sense her distress. I put my arm over her shoulder, pulled her close, and rested my lips on her forehead. “It means we’re lucky to have you.”
“Thanks.”
“Everything would’ve been a whole lot worse if we’d been caught with our pants down. Even then, only half of us actually had pants. Except for Milo’s footy jammies. I still don’t know what the hell to think of those.”
That finally made Julie smile a tiny bit. She put her arm around my waist and the two of us spent the next minute in silence watching the army below that would be killing us in twenty-three hours. “I’m just scared is all.”
“That’s normal.”
Now she did laugh, but it was a bitter one. “Now being scared about being quarantined with a monster would be normal. That doesn’t bug me in the slightest. All these people in danger, and I’m scared about being cursed. Go figure. Maybe I’m selfish.”
“Says the woman who risks her life daily protecting the clueless. Look, I’m okay with selfish. Selfish keeps you alive longer, and I want you around for a long time.”
“I suck at being selfish.” Julie sighed. “Have them send somebody up to replace me. I’ll go herd cats.”
“Thanks, hon. Just promise me one thing.”
“What?”
“Keep me in the loop about this stuff. If anything else weird happens, I want to know right away,” and as I made that request, Julie stiffened against me. “What? I just want to help.”
“Nothing.” Julie slowly relaxed. “Anything else happens, I’ll tell you, I promise.”
Trip held up one fist, the signal to halt. I froze in place. “You hear that?”
The two of us were on the empty shopping concourse. The only sound I was picking up was the burbling noise of a nearby fountain. “What?”
“A phone,” Trip exclaimed as he took off running. Everybody could hear better than me. I followed along, and a second later I could hear it as well. The ringing was coming from inside an information kiosk. Trip didn’t bother trying the door, and instead vaulted over the desk, knocking over a display of postcards and brochures of local attractions in the process.
“They’re going to charge us for those too.” I took up a defensive position next to the counter and scanned for threats while Trip looked for the phone.
“Bingo.” Trip came back up with a red headset. “Hello?”
If this was the security room warning us about something they’d seen on their video cameras, I couldn’t see it from here. As far as I knew, we were the only two in the entire shopping concourse, and this place was as big as a good-sized mall, only fancier. The palm trees’ leaves were swaying a bit from the air circulation. An ornate clock was ticking above. The ceiling was decorated with enough murals that it made the Sistine Chapel look dumpy. This was the section where the filthy rich came to buy absurdly bejeweled watches and designer shoes that cost more than normal houses. Come to think of it, I was actually in that sort of income bracket now, but mentally I would always be too much of an accountant to shop in a place like this.
“Yeah…Uh-huh…Okay. Got it.” Trip looked at me. “Mitch says we’ve got suspicious activity ahead to the right.”
That was back in the still ridiculously expensive but not completely unreasonable section. “Define suspicious.”
“One of the security alarms went off.”
“Tell Mitch that if he sees us start shooting to send backup.”
Trip did so then hung up the red phone. “Come on.”
Sound echoed for quite some distance in the huge space. As we ran toward the disturbance there was a sudden crash and the sound of breaking glass just ahead. It really made me wish for my radio.
Stupid jamming.
I reached the corner and signaled for Trip to hold position while I risked a peek. With Abomination at my shoulder, I snaked my way forward until I could peer between the leaves of a potted plant at the source of the noise.
One of the shops—an art gallery—had a broken window. The easels immediately inside had been knocked over. Glass was scattered across the tile. I couldn’t see what had caused the disturbance. It could be our monster, or it could be one of the guests had decided to do some looting. If it was the former, this could get nasty, if it was the later, it really wasn’t a problem.
I looked back at Trip and signaled for him to leapfrog forward. I pointed Abomination at the shop as Trip ran past and slid behind a concrete planter. I waited for him to get his KRISS pointed at the shop, then I moved up and past him to crouch behind a bench, ready to blast whatever scaly horror showed its hideous face.
A tense minute passed. If this was our mysterious entity, would it work the same way as it had in 1613? Was it spreading while we hesitated? Should we rush it? But the decision was made for me. There was a clank of metal on metal, and a black shape moved inside the shop. “Hold your fire,” Trip shouted. There was a gleam of reflected light as something glinted off of mirrored goggles. “Ed? Is that you?”
Edward the orc cheerfully waved one gloved hand when he saw me aiming Abomination at him. He walked through the mess, hopped down from the display stage, and walked through the broken window. He had a small painting tucked under one arm.
Befuddled, I put Abomination’s safety back on and stood up. “What’re you doing here?”
He proudly held up the painting. It was Elvis Presley on black velvet.
“Ed! There you are!” A high-pitched female voice came from the other direction. “What’ve you done?” Tanya ran down the hall toward Ed. The orc presented the painting of Elvis to her. “Oh, you big dork! We’re gonna get busted.”
“What’re you
both
doing here?”
“We were on patrol!” Tanya exclaimed. “I told Ed I really thought that painting looked totally rad and how it would look awesome hanging in my room. Oh, we’re now gonna get arrested. Way to go, Ed.” It was hard to tell with the mask, but I think that hurt his feelings. “We’ve got to run for it before the cops get here. Ed don’t understand human ways and I’m too pretty to go to prison!”
I rubbed my face in my hands. Trip began to laugh. Tanya was starting to panic and Ed was just confused. “Okay, okay, everybody relax. Tanya, chill. Ed, put that picture back. I knew I shouldn’t have let you take that chicken. It was like your gateway drug…And who in the hell thought it was a good idea to send an untrained Newbie and an orc out on patrol?” Tanya wouldn’t make eye contact and seemed intent on studying her shoes. “Tanya?”
“Nobody…Cody said the Smart Team needed to take a break from all that thinking, but I kinda still wanted to help the regular Hunters. Everybody else is pitching in. So me and Ed, we went out looking for the monster.”
I looked at Ed. “And you went along with this brilliant plan?” Ed shrugged. If these two were hanging out together, Skippy was going to lose his freaking mind.
“Are you even armed?” Trip asked her. She was only wearing a snug tank top, so if she was concealing a handgun she was a lot better at it than I was, and I had a lot of practice.
“Well, kinda…When I thought Ed was going to get arrested, I sort of…well, ditched my stash.” She walked back the way she’d come from, disappeared behind a few trees, and then came back with her
stash
, which consisted of a compound bow and a quiver of broad-head hunting arrows. The bow still had a price tag hanging off of it. “We passed a sporting goods store back there. They didn’t have no guns, but I saw this and I sort of…You know…Harbinger always says to improvise, adapt, and survive! I’m like totally improvising! I’ll pay for that window. I ain’t paying for this one though!”
“You stole that bow?” Trip was mortified.
“Borrowed,” she corrected me. “After we kill the monster I’ll give it back. I figure I’m doing them a favor. If it got used by a badass Monster Hunter they can sell it later for a whole lot more. I’m talking premium. Who wouldn’t want it then? And I know how to shoot a bow super good. Back in the Enchanted Forest we poach—I mean, we
legally
hunt deer and stuff all the time.”
“Well, she is an elf,” I told Trip. “The bow seems strangely appropriate.”
“Now that’s just racist stereotyping,” Tanya sniffed. “I’m offended.”
“You can file a complaint with the Trailer Park Elf Defamation League when we get out of this.” Another phone began to ring. This one was a courtesy phone mounted on the wall near the bathrooms. I went over and answered it. “Hello?”
“Are those friends of yours?” Mitch snapped. “If so, all that damage is going on your bill.”
At this point I didn’t know if any of us would still be alive to pay it anyway. “Yes, they’re with us. It was a misunderstanding. I’ll keep an eye on them.”
“What is it with you people and breaking every—” I hung up as Mitch continued to squawk.
“Okay, Tanya. You two need to stick with us. Ed, despite being totally clueless, I trust. You…not so much.”
She folded her arms indignantly. “Harbinger said I’m—”
“Harbinger gave you a job because the rest of us know jack and shit about magic, and he thinks you could come in handy, and we don’t have to pay a fortune to your mom in consultant’s fees. Some day you might be a full-fledged Hunter, but in the meantime you’re a Newbie who doesn’t know anything. Got it?”
“Yes, sir,” the elf muttered.
“Stick close to us and do exactly what we tell you.” The phone rang again. “Damn it.”
Trip was still getting a kick out of this. “Mitch is probably calling back with your new balance. That Elvis painting was easily the most expensive thing here.”
I flipped him off as I put the phone to my ear. “This is Pitt. What now?”
“Oh. My. God…” Mitch was breathing heavily. “I can’t believe it. It pulled their arms off. It’s hacking at them. There’s blood and guts and blood and blood and brains everywhere. Oh, God. I don’t know what it is.”
“Slow down. Where?” Trip noticed the sudden shift in my demeanor and signaled Edward, who immediately drew one of his swords.
“Concourse B, second floor. Go back to the Squishy Yogurt, up the escalator, hang a left, and go down the long red hallway. They’re in the nightclub. You’re closest. Oh God, one of them is still alive but it’s sawing on him
right now
.”
“Send help. We’re on our way.” I hung up the phone and hoisted Abomination. “It’s back.”
Chapter 15
Mitch’s hasty directions got us there fast. The long red hallway he’d mentioned was one of the places where the casino connected to the shopping area. In the middle of it was one of the Last Dragon’s three nightclubs. The double doors were open. The lights were off inside. The four of us paused in the hall to ready ourselves. We had no idea what was in there, and I
hated
that. “Wait for backup?” Trip suggested.
“That’s the smart thing to do,” I agreed. Then there was a bloodcurdling scream of agony from inside. The sound made all the hair on my arms stand up. Someone was still alive. “So much for smart. Tanya, stay put. Edward, keep an eye on her.”
“I can help—”