Minus Me (17 page)

‘Why? No! What girl?’

‘A very cool girl. The best there is.’

‘Is she your girlfriend?’

‘No. If you really must know, she’s my sister,’ Zak says, turning and marching off down the street.

‘Is that really true?’ Linda says, running after him and grabbing his arm. He wrenches his arm away, so she loses her balance and falls backwards. Zak holds her, and again she is struck by how strong that skinny body is.

‘Do I look like I’m lying?’ he hisses through his teeth.

‘No, no, I’m sorry,’ Linda whimpers, mostly from the pain of his vicelike grip.

‘Okay. So we won’t talk about it any more.’

Zak releases her. Linda rubs her arm, but she’s not about to give up.

‘What exactly are you?’

Zak doesn’t answer. He just walks on. She runs up alongside him.

‘Are you a vampire?’

‘Ha-ha! Very funny!’

‘Are you an angel, then?’

‘Don’t be daft!’

‘Are you Death, perhaps?’

This last question makes Zak stop in his tracks and burst into laughter.

‘What’s so funny?’

‘You really think I’m Death? As if death is some sort of weird guy who roams about rounding people up,’ says Zak, bursting into hysterics again. ‘Of all the superstitions in the world, the idea that Death is some sort of person, has to be the stupidest. The man with the scythe! Ha-ha-ha! Death is just a state of being, just as life is a state of being.’

‘Sometimes I don’t understand a thing you say,’ says Linda, sighing, and this time she’s the one who leaves Zak.

She can hear he still hasn’t stopped laughing. He’s standing there giggling to himself. When she glances back, she sees him shaking his head and wiping the corners of his eyes. Oh my God! It wasn’t that funny. Zak must realize he’s strange. She’s certainly never met anyone like him, at least. She wonders about this sister of his in Stavanger, and what she’s like. He wanted to get to know her, is it perhaps a half-sister or something? It’ll be exciting to find out, that’s for certain.

Linda kicks a lump of ice lying on the pavement. It lands next to a leaflet lying at the side of the road. Connie Larsen. Hairdresser and clairvoyant. What the hell’s a clairvoyant? she thinks. She stands beside the leaflet and waits for Zak. Perhaps he knows.

‘Have you finished laughing?’ she asks sarcastically, as he comes up alongside her.

‘Almost,’ he says, putting a friendly arm around her shoulders. ‘But what have we here?’ he says, looking down at the leaflet.

‘What’s a clairvoyant?’

‘Somebody who’s very good at guessing the future.’

‘A bit like you, then.’

‘Not quite. This person professes to be able to actually see into the future.’

‘To see into the future? Can’t we go and see her then?’ asks Linda.

Perhaps this Connie Larsen person could tell her something about Axel? Perhaps she’ll tell her that Axel is totally head-over-heels in love with her, and that he’ll be over the moon when she turns up, because she’s come all that way just for his sake.

‘Do you really think it’s a good idea?’ asks Zak, interrupting her thoughts.

‘It’s ages until the concert, so we’ve got to do something. And besides, what’s the worst thing that can happen?’

‘Well, she might just tell you something about the future that you’d rather not hear.’

‘I’ve met a doctor who pointed at a picture of my heart and said that there’s something wrong with it that’s so rare they don’t even know what it is, and who told me that he wasn’t even sure if a new heart would cure it, so nothing frightens me now. Not even a hairdresser who says she can see into the future.’

‘You’ve got a point,’ says Zak, stuffing his hands into his coat pockets.

‘And besides, I’d like a haircut.’

‘I think you’re perfect as you are, with long hair,’ says Zak.

‘Who do you think you are? My mother?’ asks Linda.

Chapter 35

The hairdressing salon is in the cellar of a private house. It’s not exactly full of clients, and when Zak and Linda come through the door, they find a woman with hair like white candyfloss sitting on a deep sofa browsing a magazine. On the table in front of her, on top of a pile of newspapers and magazines, sits a blue Persian cat, purring. Another lies on the sofa next to her, this one pink. Neither of the two cats seems too pleased at having visitors. They leap down to the floor and hiss at Zak and Linda.

‘Hey,’ says Linda.

‘So, the two of you have come at last,’ says the woman with the candyfloss hair, getting up and putting her magazine on the table.

‘Unusual cats,’ says Linda, unable to take her eyes off the two bundles of fur. The cats open their mouths to hiss again, this time almost soundlessly. They have their eyes glued on Zak, and they are arching their backs. Linda looks over at Zak, who has pulled his t-shirt collar up over his mouth and nose.

‘Come on, Cherry and Blossom, there’s no reason to get worked up,’ says the woman, picking up the cats.

‘Thank goodness,’ says Zak.

The woman doesn’t answer, but gives Zak a piercing stare.

‘I’m allergic,’ he says.

‘You’re a strange one, alright. But one thing you’re not, and that’s allergic to cats,’ says the hairdresser.

Linda shudders a little. So she’s not the only one who thinks there’s something strange about Zak. Perhaps this hairdresser really has got some kind of second sight? Perhaps Linda can ask her what it is about Zak? Since he’s always avoiding the subject. The candyfloss woman disappears through the door with a cat under each arm. Linda and Zak sit down on the sofa, and Linda leans towards the table to see if any of the magazines are of interest.

‘Zak, what did she mean by that?’

‘By what?’ says Zak, grabbing a magazine filled with pictures of hairstyles.

‘When she said you’re strange.’

‘If anyone’s strange it’s her. She’s totally weird,’ says Zak, flicking mechanically through the magazine. ‘Do you have any particular haircut in mind? What about that one?’ he asks, showing her a picture of a woman with the world’s most boring, mouse-coloured, pudding-basin style.

‘Certainly not that one. I want blue hair.’

‘Blue?’

‘Yes, if it looks good on a cat, it should look pretty good on me too!’ says Linda.

‘I think dyeing a cat’s fur verges on animal abuse,’ says Zak, flinging the magazine down.

‘So you don’t think my cats like being pink and blue?’ says the hairdresser.

‘Whoops,’ says Linda, who hadn’t noticed the hairdresser coming back in.

‘Well, no. I wouldn’t say they look altogether pleased,’ says Zak, who doesn’t seem the least worried about being rude.

‘Why not dye half your hair pink while you’re at it?’ asks Zak, turning to Linda.

‘No, pink would be completely wrong,’ says the hairdresser. ‘But blue would go with your eyes.’

She offers Linda one of the hairdressing chairs.

‘Are you Connie?’ asks Linda.

‘Yes, that’s me. And you are?’

‘Linda.’

Linda tries to stretch out a hand, but the hairdressing cape gets in the way.

‘Right. And the two of you are travelling?’

‘How do you know that?’

‘I’ve lived here for years, and one thing’s certain, you’re not from these parts,’ says Connie, loosening Linda’s ponytail and beginning to comb her hair.

‘Can you see into the future?’

‘I can see what might happen. But then again, everybody has free will. So even if I see, for example, that you’ve got some kind of big love in store, then you’ll be free to ruin the chance or even to turn your back on that special person who’s waiting for you.’

‘Do you see a big love like that for me?’

‘I can see that there’s lots of love and romance in store for you.’

‘It doesn’t feel that way,’ says Linda, watching Connie stirring the dye in a plastic bowl. It’s a vibrant blue. Her mother is going to get a real shock.

‘You just need to open your eyes, my girl,’ says Connie, spreading the dye on Linda’s hair. She has put gloves on and is massaging the blue right into her scalp. ‘Now you’ll have to sit with it in your hair for a bit, and then I’ll rinse it, and cut it, and blow-dry it and style it.’

‘It’s got to look really cool. We’re going to a rock concert later.’

‘That’ll be a great experience.’

‘Do you know who’s playing, then?’

‘It’s always an experience to go to concert. Would you like a cup of tea?’

‘A coffee, please. If you’ve got some,’ says Linda.

‘Aren’t you a bit young for coffee?’ says Connie, looking at her doubtfully in the mirror.

‘Maybe . . . but when you have as little time as I do, you have to hurry up and try as many things as possible.’

‘You’re very young, you’ve got all the time you need.’

‘Are you sure?’

‘Everybody has the time they need,’ says Connie, going out.

‘Weirdo,’ says Zak, when she’s left the room.

‘Shh. What if she hears you?’

‘I don’t give a damn if she does,’ says Zak.

‘Perhaps she can tell your fortune too?’

‘I don’t want my fortune told. And I can’t be bothered to hang around here any longer either. I’m going for a walk. I’ll meet you afterwards, when you’re finished,’ he says, getting up from the sofa.

One of the cats has crept back into the salon. It hisses. Zak looks down and hisses back at it. Linda swings round on her chair, just in time to see the cat, with its stomach almost flat on the floor, streaking past her and out through the door it came in.

Connie blow-dries Linda’s hair and then she puts some wax on her hands and makes it stand up in spikes.

‘That’s awesome,’ says Linda, sighing with relief. She has to admit she was a bit nervous when Connie started cutting it. She’s always had long hair, and has never dared to cut it in case she regretted it.

‘There, you’re ready for your concert now,’ says Connie, holding up a mirror so Linda can admire her new hair-do from every angle.

‘Brilliant!’ says Linda, nodding.

Connie takes off the cape, and Linda bounds out into the centre of the room. The new haircut has made her feel somehow lighter, as though her hair had weighed a hundred kilos. She goes out into the hall and gets her purse from her jacket hanging on the coat stand.

‘No, I don’t want anything for it,’ says Connie.

Linda looks at Connie and bites her lip. What’s going on? Nobody gives things away for free, do they?

‘Are you sure?’ asks Linda.

‘Yes, it was jolly good fun. It’s not often someone comes in wanting blue hair.’

‘Well, thank you,’ says Linda hesitantly. She takes her jacket and goes back out into the hall. Zak’s right, this hairdresser does seem a bit bonkers.

‘Everything will be just fine. Just believe in love. And don’t forget: it can be right under your nose!’ Connie shouts after her, as she waves goodbye.

It’s very cold out, but Linda doesn’t put her woolly hat back on. She doesn’t want to spoil her hair. And now she thinks about it, that was all she got out of her visit – a haircut. Connie hadn’t said anything that made her any the wiser. In that sense she was a bit like Zak. Strange that they should take such an instant dislike to each other. Or perhaps they disliked each other because they were so alike?

Chapter 36

The cold weather has finally triumphed over vanity, and Linda is wearing her woolly hat pulled down over her ears. And in her ears she has music. She’s warming up for the concert with the Pet Monsters’ biggest hit: ‘Deep Pain’. I never really cared for pleasure, so I smile when your words cut me like a razor. Zak was nowhere to be seen when she left the hairdresser’s, and it was too cold to wait, so she started to walk. He knows where the concert is, so they’ll probably meet there, Linda thinks, humming along with the track. All Pet Monsters’ tracks have piles of energy. It puts a spring in her step.

She always thinks of Axel when she listens to the Pet Monsters. Linda remembers seeing him bending over something he’s writing at the desk in his room. His tanned neck against the bright-yellow football shirt that announces he’s a Brazil fan. She creeps up behind him and puts her hands over his eyes.

‘Linda?’ he asks.

‘No, it’s Father Christmas,’ she answers. Then she feels him taking away her hands before swinging round on his chair.

She asks what he’s doing.

‘Nothing,’ he answers, and closes his notebook behind him, before opening a drawer and hiding it away.

‘Nothing? Are you writing a diary? That’s nothing to be embarrassed about,’ says Linda.

‘It’s not a diary,’ says Axel, getting up.

‘Well, if it’s not a diary then I should be allowed to look. Have you written something about me, perhaps?’ Linda leans forward to open the drawer.

Axel grabs her wrist.