Mine to Bear: Icy Cap Den #2 (Alaskan Den Men) (4 page)

H
ow do
I begin to explain the worst decision I ever made to my best friend? Sure, Trudy was a best friend with benefits now, but she’d always been there for me, even back when we were kids. Now what I had to tell her was so vile that I feared losing her forever.

With Trudy lying on the couch, shaken and pale, now wasn’t the best time to explain. But there was never going to be a good time. I didn’t want her to think that I would hurt her or anyone else in Icy Cap purposely.

“Last night wasn’t the first time I met the succubus. Back in high school, I met a young woman out on the edge of the sea ice. She said she was lost. She wasn’t from Icy Cap. I learned, too late, the succubus trolls the shoreline for sailors or hunters to glamour.”

I paused, looking over at Trudy. Her eyes were closed, with the back of her hand resting over her eyes. She might have been asleep, but I knew she wasn’t. It pained me to think she couldn’t bear the sight of me.

“You know how badly I wanted to get out of Icy Cap for college. I didn’t have the money for a college in California; even with a scholarship that place is crazy expensive.” I paused. What I was about to say couldn’t be taken back. “I made a deal with the succubus.”

I glanced at Trudy, but all I got was her profile.

“She loaned me money I needed, and I didn’t reveal her location.” Paranorms were loath to organize around anything, given all the difficult histories among the species. But a succubus was something else. No species was immune to her powers. If and when a succubus settled near a community, the paranorms banded together and drove her out.

No one in Icy Cap had known where she lived until it was too late.

“I’m going hate the answer,” Trudy said, “but how did you know where she lived?

I swallowed. My mouth was dry. “For a while, I met her there.”

“You fucked her back then while you were fucking me?” Trudy’s voice wavered, but she didn’t look at me.

“I swear to you that she and I were over before you and I began.”

“Fucking,” Trudy said. “It’s called fucking. Don’t try to shine it up now.”

“If I could go back, I’d do things differently.”

“That’s a relief.” She pulled her hand away from her face. “You knew she was planning to burn the town down?”

“Of course not. I only found out when Ash told me after I left. I felt terrible.”

“But not terrible enough to tell anyone the truth or give the money back?” Trudy stood up, a bit unsteady on her feet, but she didn’t fall over. She warned me off with a shake of her head.

“That’s why I’m here, to pay her back.”

“I almost died in that trap. The blood loss could’ve killed me. It was lucky Tristan found me and Meg could heal my wound.” She stood now, gazing at the snow falling outside the window. It was midafternoon and still dark.

“I would’ve done things differently.”

“You lied last night. You lied about why you came to town. You lie to yourself about your ice bear spirit. So many lies. I don’t know if there’s any truth left to you.”

Trudy headed out of my office, placing a hand on the walls to steady herself as she walked.

“Let’s talk about this.” I followed her, darting around to step in front of the main lodge door while she shrugged into her coat.

“Move,” she said.

“You’re upset. Let me take you home.”

“Don’t bother,” she sneered through her tears. “I’ll take my fox.” The door slammed behind her.

M
y impulsivity was biting
me in the ass—literally. Frostbite was settling into the tips of my fingers and toes. I knew what the numb meant. I’d lived here my whole life. Not only was I furious with Dane, myself, and the universe in general, my fucking fox spirit had abandoned me.

I called on my fox spirit but got nothing. Not even a tug of recognition. It was as if she was on vacation—or dead. Neither was possible. Of course, I was the only fox shifter left in Icy Cap. My family had scattered after the fire years ago. Something was terribly wrong with me.

I soldiered on, too proud to turn back.

But not too proud to admit I wished Dane would come after me.

When I heard a snowmachine approaching, relief and embarrassment washed over me. Dane might be a selfish rat bastard, but it was awfully hard to talk yourself out of loving someone.

With the thick snow, I couldn’t see anything. I waved the snowmachine down, and it pulled up alongside me.

I sniffed.

Not Dane.

Gary was driving the snowmachine, while Max rode behind him.

“Need a lift?” Gary called.

“Doesn’t look like you have room!” I shouted over the engine noise. I was a slight person, but there’s not really room for more than two on a snowmachine. Max was outfitted in a snowsuit. Gary was underdressed, as usual. Ghouls don’t require temperature regulation. It’s part of their slow metabolism.

Gary and Max hopped off the machine. Gary pulled a blanket from a saddlebag and handed it to me. “This should help.”

“How’d you guys find me?”

“Max followed your scent.” Gary hung his head. “I’m having trouble tracking you lately.”

My stomach turned. Gary had been stalking me? Was nobody what they were supposed to be lately? I took a few gulping breaths of frigid air.

Without any explanation, Max punched Gary in the gut. My longtime friend crumpled to the ground.

“What the fuck?” I rushed to Gary. He curled on his side, gasping for breath. I turned on Max, who was calmly removing his helmet. “What’s the matter with you?”

“I’m a vampire.” He bared his teeth at me, then climbed on the snowmachine. “Get on.” He jerked his gloved thumb behind him. “You’re coming with me.”

“I’m not going anywhere with you.” I brushed Gary’s hair away from his face. He was still trying to catch his breath after getting the wind knocked out of him.

“You will get on this machine with me now, or I’ll kill you here.”

I stood up. My anger at Gary’s suffering bubbled into rage. Who did this guy think he was? My fox could outrun him. I knew every hollow in this county.

“Having trouble, little fox?” Max flashed his fangs at me again. “You still don’t get it, do you? No wonder shifters reproduce so quickly. Their brains lag behind.”

“You think I’m pregnant?” I wrapped my arms around myself, trying to stop my shaking. “That is impossible.” I looked from him to my friend writhing in the snow. “Gary?”

“Something is different about you. You don’t smell the same.”

“For fuck’s sake, stop staying that!” I snapped.

“It’s true.” Max said. “Come with me or I’ll break your neck here. My mistress won’t be pleased with me, but I’m tired of your whining.”

His mistress.

Oh, fuck. Max was working with the succubus. And she thought I was pregnant? Not good at all. She was wrong, but either way, being wanted by a succubus is a very bad thing.

If I resisted, Max would kill me. If I went with him, the succubus would kill me. The only thing that would help me was time. Time to shift into my fox, time for me to escape, or time for Dane to find me.

“We can’t leave Gary here.”

“It takes a very long time for ghouls to freeze.”

I knelt next to Gary. His face was scrunched in pain. I pressed my hand to his arm and mouthed “Get Dane” to him. A far as plans went, this one sucked.

Max drove the snowmachine inland toward the mountains. Even without my fox, the land breeze smelled piney. The blanket was better than nothing, but I was still getting pretty cold.

“Hey, you got another blanket around?” I asked into my helmet microphone. This vamp liked expensive toys.

“You should have a snowsuit on,” Max replied in my ear.

“Next time I’m abducted, I’ll try to dress more appropriately.”

Max slowed the snowmachine.

Uh-oh.
Dread accumulated inside me. Had he decided to kill me anyway?

He got off his machine.

I did not. If he wanted to kill me, he was going to have to work at it.

Max hung the key around his neck. He unzipped his one-piece snowsuit.

“What are you doing?”

“Wear this. You’ll be warmer.” He climbed out of the suit and handed it to me.

OK.
Yes, I would be warmer, but he was going to die out here pretty quickly. Given the current situation, I wasn’t going to cry about it. That succubus wanted me.

I shrugged into his suit without further discussion. If he got cold enough, I would stand a much better chance of escape. I zipped the suit up. It was too long but blissfully warm.

I climbed back on the machine, waiting for Max. If only he’d left the key in the ignition. I got none of the breaks my detectives did.

All thought was wiped from my brain. Max stood in snow swirling around his knees wearing a leather collar, assless chaps, thigh-high boots, and not much else.
That
was what he was wearing under this snowsuit?

Before I could formulate any of the questions crowding my brain, a voice behind me said, “You’re late.”

Shit. This day just kept getting worse.

I turned around to find a familiar fur coat and hat. Their owner’s face was now visible to me. She looked like a Russian grandmother to a mobster.

“I’m Rika. I don’t think we’ve been properly introduced.”

“Fuck you.” I’d taken my helmet off to say it. Really, what else could I say? The situation was way beyond pleasantries.

“You know what you call a shifter who can’t shift? No guesses?” Rika clucked her tongue. “You were supposed to be clever. They’re called useless. Although in your case, you have one use. You’re an incubator.”

A nauseating fear crept over me.
That must be what Max meant.
I would kill myself before I’d incubate her offspring.

“You can sit on your own damn nest,” I said.

Rika’s smile revealed gums and rotten teeth. “Stupid girl. Still haven’t figured it out yet?”

I wanted to shift right now—raise my fox spirit and bite her, then run like hell. I wouldn’t do much damage, really, but it’d feel great. When I reached down for my fox, though, it lay quietly within me. Almost asleep, but not quite. What the fuck was the matter?

The words formed from my lips at the same time as they registered in my brain. “I can’t shift because I’m pregnant. But that isn’t possible. I haven’t been with a fox shifter,” I babbled. Apparently shock had muddled my brain.

Rika gave me a hard look from under her fur hat. “Don’t underestimate my intelligence because you overestimated your own.”

“It’s not possible.” I shook my head, trying to clear all this away like a bad dream. “Dane is an ice bear shifter. Different species shifters can’t reproduce.”

“Just because you haven’t seen that in your short life doesn’t mean it doesn’t happen. Let’s call it unlikely but not impossible. If I were you, I’d buy a lottery ticket.”

“Dane.” I had to tell him.

Rika read my thoughts. “Let’s just keep this between us girls.”

“Dane has a right to know he’s the father.”

“Max, make sure you get her back to the house before you freeze. I’ll be along shortly.”

“I’m not one of your sex slaves. You can’t make me help you,” I said.

Rika raised her hand, and my tongue lay heavy in my mouth. “Time for talk later. Now you are my guest. Go get settled in at my house.”

I climbed on the snowmachine behind the vamp. My mind whirled in a million directions. I was pregnant with Dane’s child. Never crossed my mind, even though we’d been fucking several times a day for the last month.

I’d never heard of a cross-species pregnancy, even when I was a kid and Icy Cap was a bustling community before the fire. The pregnancy sure would explain my symptoms, though. And even though I’d had this information for such a short time, I already knew I’d do whatever it took to protect this baby.

The vamp and I progressed into increasingly hilly territory. I was forced to hold his waist so I didn’t fall off. Max’s skin was like ice under my gloved hands. Being glamoured by Rika meant wearing BDSM garb under a snowsuit. This was not a fate I wanted to share by any means.

O
utside the inn
, my snowmachine wouldn’t start. Incredible. I gave the back tread a swift kick, which did nothing but stub my toe. My first order of business was to repay Rika and tell her to leave Trudy alone. Then I’d seek Trudy out and try to make things right between us before I left town. I bent over the snowmachine engine again, trying to figure out what was wrong. My skill was solving financial problems, not mechanical ones.

Fuck this.
I couldn’t concentrate on fixing the machine. I had to pay Rika back and see Trudy. The first thought gnawed at me, and the second was like a fire under my skin. I’d never felt so agitated before in my life.

I stripped out of my clothes, tossing them in a heap inside the empty inn. I stepped outside in the falling snow, barefoot. My toes dug into the snow, but I didn’t feel cold. I felt strangely alive. I started out in a slow jog that increased to a run.

My bear was joyful to be unleashed. A desire to roll in the snow and head out to the ice tugged at me. But I wouldn’t be dissuaded. Trudy’s cabin was easy to find after all these years. I
had
to see her. Rika could wait.

Before I knew it, the cabin came into view. Even covered by deep snow, its shabbiness made me wince. It wasn’t just the peeling paint and gutters pulled down by thickened ice, it was the loneliness of the place.

When I’d thought of Trudy over the past years before returning to Icy Cap, (and I’d thought of her more than I’d ever admit), I always imagined her surrounded by her family. Unlike polar bears, foxes usually have strong bonds among all their family. Polar bears are more variable. Rebuilding Icy Cap was Ash’s attempt at changing that. Even if it’s not something I wanted to be a part of, I respected the effort.

I shifted again in front of the cabin, returning to my human form. From what Trudy had said, Ash ran around naked much of the time. I didn’t love the idea of her getting an eyeful of my brother’s cock and balls on a regular basis.

“Trudy?” I called, turning the door handle. It was open. The cabin was without power and heat. And it smelled rank.

Paperback novels teetered in stacks along the walls. Her bed in the corner was unmade. Family-picture collages covered the walls. Her family was huge. Foxes are pretty darn good at reproducing. Her place was lived in but strangely silent.

And that smell. It was like something died in there.

Oh, God. If something happened to Trudy . . .
My heart thundered in my chest. Something wasn’t right.

Gary the Ghoul padded out from the kitchen.

I covered the distance between us in two strides, grabbing him by his North Pole Community College sweatshirt. I lifted him off the floor.

“Where is she?”

“Hey!” Gary swatted at my arm. “Put me down.”

His sweatshirt was ripped in several places. His flannel lounge pants were worn thin. His eyes were more bloodshot than usual.

“Where is she?” I struggled for calm. The sight of this ghoul in Trudy’s place made me want to tear his head off.

“Why should I tell you?” He sniffled.

“Do you really want to test me? Go ahead.” If there was anything more irritating than a lovesick ghoul, nothing came to mind. “I’m half mad with worry. The other half of me is just plain mad. And it’ll make me feel better to take out all this pent-up anger on someone. Do you want it to be you?”

Gary flinched. “Don’t hit me again.”

I stopped. “I never hit you. What the hell is going on?”

“He hit me when he took her.” Gary stared at the floor as he spoke.

My entire body flushed with heat, then a chill. “Who?”

Gary blubbered, reminding me of a faucet that had sprung a leak. “I thought Max was my friend.”

“You’re sure it was Max who took her?”

He nodded.

“Where?” I said through clenched teeth.

“The succubus.” Gary wiped his nose on his sleeve.

Fuck.
I should have killed that succubus years before, when I had the chance.

“She wants Trudy because she’s pregnant.” Gary sniffled.

“
What?
”

“Don’t take this the wrong way, but you shifters have a shitty sense of smell. Both Max and I noticed she smelled different, but Max knew what it was. Apparently he’s been working with the succubus. But you knew that already, since you’ve been sleeping with her too. What a dick.”

“Hey!” I said. “That was a long time ago.” I paused. “But you’re right. It was a dick thing to do. I’m going to do whatever it takes to get Trudy back.”

I am a fucking idiot
. All my fancy education and brains would be wasted if I lost Trudy. She carried my child. She was my mate. How could I have denied that for all these wasted years?
If I’ve lost her . . .

All that mattered was protecting her and our child. Spending the rest of my life apologizing for my stupidity would not be penance enough. I had to hope she would forgive me.

But fuck, this rescue consisted of me and a lovesick ghoul with sinus problems. She deserved better than that.

I had no snowmachine. Trudy had some hunting rifles. There was no one else around that I trusted.

“She won’t smell you if I’m around,” Gary suggested.

Good point.

I’d forgotten one other thing. My ice bear.

“She’ll be expecting us. You can ride my ice bear.”

Gary wiped his nose on his sleeve again. “I don’t need a ride. I can keep up.”

“You sure?”

“I run cross-country for my community college PE requirement. I’m the sixth fastest in the state for my age.”

“Let’s go.” My bear spirit rose, and I didn’t try to quash it.

I’m coming for you, Trudy. Hang on.