Mind Games: An Urban Fantasy Novel (The Lillim Callina Chronicles Book 6) (18 page)

That simple touch was like a shock of electricity, arching through me and pulling me back from the brink of nothingness. He had shifted back on my body, presumably to get better access at my more sensitive bits now that I was incapacitated, or so he thought. Anger surged through me as I bucked my hips upward with every ounce of strength I had. He jerked forward, one arm flailing outward for balance as his knees came off my wrists, and he toppled forward, his other hand still caught in my shirt.

My hands shot out, catching him under the armpits as I rolled my body, flinging him forward as his nails tore gouts of flesh from my torso. He slammed face first into the sidewalk with a sickening crack as I completed the maneuver and wound up sitting on his back with his legs on either side of my body, my arms wrapped firmly around them. I pushed off the ground with my feet, wrenching his back violently backward as I threw all my strength into the submission hold, only I had no plan on letting him submit. That would be too good for him.

“Turns out I like it rough. I hope you do too,” I growled as something inside his back snapped, crackled, and popped. “I promise it won’t be nearly as fun for you as it will be for me though. I’m selfish that way. Hope that’s okay.” He screamed in agony, and the sound was like music to my ears. His hands flailed back at me, trying to slap at me, but from his position, he couldn’t muster much strength to do any damage.

“What’s the matter? Not so much fun when you’re the one on the bottom? Didn’t you know? I like it on top.” I jerked backward one more time and was rewarded by another scream before something inside him snapped, and he went limp beneath me. I guess I broke the walls down.

Before I could even release him, his body evaporated, leaving me half-standing there in the dark, holding onto nothing as my chest heaved from exertion. I whirled around, trying to find out where he had gone, but no sign of him remained. How could he just escape like that? I took a few steps toward his car when it vanished from sight. I blinked in disbelief. Had breaking his back somehow evicted the deity and all things associated with him from my mind?

Or, worse yet, had I imagined the whole thing?

The thought stayed with me as my hand drifted to my torso. The scratches were gone. I swallowed. No, no it had felt so real…

My eyes caught on something glinting in the darkness. I knelt down next to it and picked it up. The knife Fenris had used to cut me up was still wet with my blood. It gleamed under the light of the moon. So it had been real.

Chapter 21

My parents were still asleep when I arrived back home, which was both good and made sense. Even though it felt like it had taken forever and a day, the attack by Fenris had barely lasted a couple minutes, and I’d barely been down the block. I’d probably been gone from home less than ten minutes. It made the situation surreal and terrifying at the same time.

I still wasn’t quite sure how the wolf had managed to invade my dream world, but I was starting to think that all of Loki’s ill begotten brood might have illusion based powers. If that was true, I’d have to be a lot more careful since I had no idea what their limitations might be. I’d gotten lucky with Fenris, but if he tried anything again, I doubt he’d be so intent on being a perverted dirt bag. If I wasn’t careful, I could walk into a trap so complete, I’d never escape. The thought gave me the willies.

The rise and fall of my parents’ chests as they slept was strangely soothing, and I stood there watching them for a long time, at least it felt like a long time as far as things went. I still had Fenris’s knife gripped in my left hand because I wasn’t going to let the weapon out of my sight. I was worried that if I did, it’d evaporate into mist. Still, it would make for some awkward conversation if my mom and dad awoke to find their deranged daughter standing over them with a bloody knife. It made me think of old fairy tales, and I was instantly glad the only one who had to die in my story was me. That was good. I’d died before, and it hadn’t made a lasting impression anyway.

Besides, I wasn’t sure if I could kill my parents if need be. Myself, sure. I could do that. It’d be easy. I could just throw myself off a building or in front of a bus. Not much involved but killing them would be impossible. I gripped the knife tighter, knowing what I had to do to escape this dream world and trying to enjoy the sight of them so peaceful in their slumber one last time.

It didn’t really matter that they weren’t real. It didn’t matter that I might not even remember this memory when I awoke. I had it right here and right now, and in this exact moment, it was enough.

“I know I don’t say this enough, but I love you guys.” The words came flooding out of my mouth before I realized I had said them aloud. “Even though you’re both fake, and in the real world you’re both insane killers, I still love you.” I shut my eyes, trying to ward off the tears threatening to spill out and stream down my cheeks, not that it mattered. Not really. There was no one to see me cry. “I enjoyed this time together more than you know.”

With those words, I walked out of the room, leaving them to their slumber as tears cascaded down my cheeks. Already, the sun was starting to slip up over the horizon, bathing the world in purples and reds. It took me a little longer than I’d have like, but I made it back outside and onto the roof before the sun had risen more than a few inches.

I watched as it came up, filling the sky with light and chasing the darkness away. I knew it wasn’t real, but that was okay. I shut my eyes and lay back against the red tile of our roof, knowing my mom would have a conniption if she caught me up here, not that it mattered in the slightest. The thought hurt more than I thought it would.

As the sunlight hit the weapon Fenris had left behind, the blade flashed, and I could have sworn I saw the shimmering of a huge serpent with scales the color of volcanic glass within its blade. I fiddled with the knife for a moment longer, playing the light off of it in different ways, but the image didn’t return, and before I knew it, the sun had lit the entire sky, spilling reds and purples across the horizon and painting the earth scarlet.

“Are you ready?” the ketchup girl said from a few feet away. I craned my head toward the sound of her voice and saw her sitting cross-legged on the roof next to me, staring out at the sunrise.

“No,” I replied with a shake of my head. “But not for the reasons you think.”

“You think you know what I think?” she asked, and I didn’t get the impression she was angry at my presumptuousness or even mocking me. Her words seemed more curious than anything.

“I want to wait for Zef’s plan. For the earth to split open and for blood to fill the streets or whatever. I want to make sure Jormungand goes down.” I smiled and smacked the flat of the blade against my knee. “He needs to go into the dirt.”

“Even if that kills you?” she asked, arching one eyebrow at me.

“Even if it kills me, but I can live with that.” I smirked, and she frowned. Evidently, I was less funny than I thought, who knew?

“You’re a strange one, Miss Callina,” she said as she got to her feet and sauntered over to me, strangely nimble as she moved across the rounded, red Spanish tile.

“You know, I’ve heard that before,” I replied, and she nodded at me.

“No doubt.” The ketchup girl reached out and gently touched the tip of my knife with one tiny finger. The weapon flashed with the light of a thousand suns, and I had to turn away to keep from going completely blind.

When I looked back, she was gone, but the knife in my hand glowed with an otherworldly light. I watched in amazement as the blade elongated in my grip until I was holding a full length katana. The blade was the color of freshly fallen snow and a black as coal snake coiled around the hilt of the sword, jaws open and distended as it tried to swallow the sun embedded in the weapon’s pommel.

Isis. I was holding Isis. The first half of my Dioscuri weapon, Shirajirashii, and what was even better was it seemed to still be fused with Apep. How was that even possible? I remembered having the blades stripped away as I tried to defend myself against Lang and Polyphemus. What was going on?

I held the katana out in front of myself, letting the sunlight play off of the blade, and as I did so, I felt the spark of life within. It was like the faintest yawn after a long night’s sleep. The spirit within shuffled a bit, stretching herself outward like a well-rested cat. My breath caught in my throat as the first surge of power shot up my arm, electrifying my senses and making the world around me feel dead and flat.

The opaque dreariness of the sunshine hit me like a bowling ball to the face, and I realized that with this weapon in hand, I could see the edges of my cage. It was a pretty cage, sure, but it was still a cage, complete with cracks in the floor and grime in the nooks and crannies.

“Hello,” I said to the sword and stepped off the roof, calling upon my magic. The wind buffeted me as I landed lightly to the grass below, no worse for wear than if I’d stepped off my front porch. “I missed you.”

The katana throbbed in my hand, the symbols etched along its blade glowing with blue energy as I stepped forward into the graying day. As I moved, the world fell away, leaving me walking out into an endless sea of white. I spun around, throwing one last glance at my fake parents, and even though I knew they were figments of my imagination, it still hurt to leave them behind.

“Goodbye.” I waved my free hand at the house, and as I made the motion, it vanished, replaced by still more white. The first time I’d experienced the void had been unnerving, breaking my mind almost to the point of insanity, but now, years later, it felt like coming home though I couldn’t explain why. I guess I’d just gotten used to the vast emptiness.

“You haven’t come to see me in a long time, your current absence notwithstanding,” Isis said from behind me. “I was beginning to think you didn’t like me.”

My cheeks flushed as I turned and stared at the Egyptian Goddess. She was right after all. Of all my spirits, she was the one I communed with the least, but I had a good reason. While she may have been the goddess of protection and magic, she was also a trickster. As far as I knew, she’d never tried to pull one over on me, but it still made me wary of speaking with her. Which was sort of saying something, considering I’d probably spent the most time with Apep, the Egyptian deification of chaos and absolute darkness, but there it was.

Isis stood before me with a rather impressive pout plastered across her pale face. Her milk white hair was bunched up on her head in a way that reminded me of a princess from a galaxy far, far away. She stepped forward, and her flowing sapphire dress threw off blue sparks that spit and popped in the air between us.

“I don’t know why you’d get that impression,” I lied and smiled at her as best I could. “You’re clearly my favorite.”

“You shouldn’t lie to me, Lillim.” Isis’s lips, the color of a freshly suffocated corpse, twisted into a sad smile. “I’m not upset. I’m just surprised you’ve called on me of all, pardon the term, people.”

I was about to lie but thought better of it. She was supposed to help me, after all. If she didn’t want to help, I was pretty much screwed. What use would arguing do, especially since she was in fact a goddess and clearly saw my lies for what they were? I harrumphed. Honesty was going to be the best policy after all. Who knew?

“I’m sorry for being sucky.” I shrugged. “You’re just scary.”

“More scary than Apep?” She arched one milky eyebrow at me and snorted. “I’m not sure whether to be offended or impressed.”

I shrugged again because the only thing I could think to say was, “More from column B, I hope.”

She waved off my words. “I would ask why you have summoned me, but I’m pretty sure I know the answer.” She reached out and took my hand in her own. Her touch was like trying to hold onto a handful of lava, and for an instant, I almost considered pulling away. “You want me to help you break through the illusions.”

“You’re not going to ask me why you should help me?” I asked through clenched teeth, fighting to keep the pain of her touch in check. “Even though I’ve been a pretty horrible host and let you be taken away?”

She laughed, a quaint little sound that filled me with longing and made me wish I’d been nicer to her in the past. “Why wouldn’t I help you? I
chose
you. If I didn’t want to help you, despite your little idiosyncrasies, I wouldn’t have been bound at all.” She showed me her teeth. “I am a goddess after all. One people still remember. Quite powerful, if I do say so myself.”

“That is an excellent point,” I replied, shaking my head because it really was. I couldn’t remember how I had gotten Isis to bind herself to my weapon during my past life as Dirge Meilan, and I’d never had the audacity to outright ask the goddess about the details. It seemed sort of rude because I ought to remember. It was like when I forgot the exact date of my parents’ birthdays and had to sneak a look at their IDs to avoid embarrassing myself.

“Well, now that your silliness is out of the way, what say you we kick some scaly serpent ass?” Isis smiled, and for the first time in a very long time, I saw the expression fill the entire essence of her being. “I’d prefer it to be Apep, of course, but for the time being, I’ll settle for Jormungand. He needs to learn the power of Egypt.” She shrugged as a thought flashed through her milky eyes. “I still can’t believe he tore me away like that. Do you have any idea how much it hurts to get forcibly ripped away from the Dioscuri to whom you’ve been bound?”

“Quite a lot, I’d imagine,” I said, thinking back to how it’d felt when it’d happened. It was like having my soul torn in pieces before being doused with napalm. Times a thousand.

“You don’t even know.” She narrowed her eyes at something in the distance. “But I’m going to make our fine, legless friend quite aware.” Her gaze snapped back to me and actual fire blazed where her eyes had been. “So what’s the plan?”

“I need you to let me see through my eyes, but you need to keep me hidden from Jormungand,” I replied, hoping my plan would work.