Midnight Angel (4 page)

“Speak for yourself. I’ve learned a lot from
the past. And I think it’s
us
that’s so potent.”

She raised an eyebrow. “This from the man
who said we were nothing more than a high-school crush?”

He accepted the blow. “An immature boy said
that, not the man I am now.”

She swallowed hard. “Who is that man, and
what does he want from me?” she asked.

“Time will tell.” He didn’t mean to be
cryptic, but he could hardly say,
I’ve come back for you
,
and expect her to believe his words when his promise had failed her
before. “Just give me some time.”

Her fingers touched her moist, red lips.
“Sex wasn’t enough before.”

“We’re older and wiser now.”

She grinned. “We can always hope.” She let
herself into the apartment and shut the door behind her.

He expelled a breath and tried to pull
himself together. He’d been her first, Dylan remembered, and though
she’d been an eager learner, she’d rarely initiated sex. This
teasing side of her was new, and he liked it a whole lot.

He couldn’t wait to explore more.

Holly knew she’d either lost her mind or she
was experiencing an early midlife crisis. There was no other
explanation for kissing Dylan and then agreeing to spend more time
with him. Then again, what choice did she have? The clean break
they’d taken—make that the clean break he’d forced on her—hadn’t
accomplished anything. Their chemistry and connection was still as
strong as ever. She had no choice but to play this through to
whatever conclusion awaited her, or she couldn’t move on with her
life. She’d be in the same limbo hell she’d been in for the last
ten years.

So by the time he rang her doorbell the
following morning, she was dressed in her favorite jeans and
baseball cap and she was ready to shop in Boston with Dylan by her
side.

She opened the door, and he greeted her with
a cup of Starbucks in each hand. “You come bearing gifts?” she
asked, laughing.

“Straight up for me and a froufrou drink for
you. I can’t think of a better way to take the T to Copley,” he
said, speaking of Boston’s version of public transportation.

“I must’ve heard you wrong. America’s
heartthrob is going to take the train? Do you want to get mobbed?”
She shook her head, realizing she really hadn’t thought about his
ego or what his lifestyle must be like now. “Never mind. To be so
successful, you must like the spotlight.”

He shrugged, looking uncomfortable.
“
Like
isn’t the right word. It comes with the territory of
being successful. You get used to it, but you don’t ever enjoy not
having a personal life or having to work for a solitary
moment.”

She studied his serious face. “You don’t
enjoy the fame?” she asked, surprised.

“I did in the beginning. But it got old
fast, and I realized that no matter how many people surrounded me,
I was always alone. And lonely.”

The wistful sound in his voice caught her
off guard and she narrowed her gaze. “Should I pull out the
violin?”

He laughed at that. “I’m not looking for
your pity. I’m just answering your question and telling it like it
is. I want you to know me. Who I was and who I’ve become. Yes, I
love my career, but I’ve given up a lot for it.” Again he sobered
as he spoke.

She met his serious stare and suddenly
wondered if his return could have more to do with his emotional
state than a brief visit to see his mother. He seemed so
reflective. But she couldn’t imagine that Dylan had suddenly
decided that he missed home and Holly. Not after a silent ten
years. Which brought up the question, just where did she fit into
the equation of his life?

“We all make choices,” she said of his
decision to pursue a Hollywood career.

“And sometimes we live to regret them.” He
squeezed her hand, and she felt as if her heart were being clenched
tight as well.

“Are you saying you’re sorry you went to
L.A.?”

He shook his head. “I’m sorry for how I went
about it.”

She swallowed hard and nodded, not certain
she was ready for any further discussion on their past, yet she
wasn’t ready to end the talk just yet. “And now?”

He grinned. “Now we go about taking things
one step at a time. We’re going shopping, and we’re going to take
the train like regular people. Nobody’s going to expect to see me
on the T, so they’ll think maybe I share a resemblance with the
famous Dylan North, but they’ll be so sure they’re wrong they’ll
leave us alone.” He wagged his eyebrows like a kid. “That’s what I
want. How about you?”

“That’s what I want too.” That’s what scared
her so much, she thought as she picked up her ski jacket and her
bag. “So who are you shopping for today?”

“I’m a big brother,” he explained. And
during their trip to the city, he told her about Darrell, the kid
he mentored, and the program he’d been funding with a percentage of
his earnings for the last two years.

In Sports Authority he purchased a pair of
Reebok basketball sneakers, a Spalding official NBA basketball, and
some gym clothes for Darrell. Then he ordered basketballs in bulk
for a youth program and arranged to have everything shipped to a
community center in South Central L.A. Watching the care he took in
choosing the gifts, Holly learned that the man wasn’t just rich and
famous, but he gave back to the community in which he lived, and it
became even harder to rein in her heart.

Over lunch he changed the subject. He wanted
to hear about her years in college and medical school, which she
managed to condense into a short story since she wanted to hear
more about him.

He told her about his trip and all his
firsts in L.A. She learned about his initial glimpse of the
Hollywood sign, his search for an agent and his first job waiting
tables, a job from which he was fired for spilling iced tea down
Dolly Parton’s dress. Laughing, he insisted on paying the
check.

While she shopped for family and friends, he
revisited his excitement over his first acting job, when he learned
which actors would take him under their wing and which were too
afraid of losing their own success to help someone else. For the
first time she was able to put her hurt aside and see what he’d
been searching for as an actor.

She understood they still needed to talk
about how he’d handled his decision to leave her, but for now she
was content to enjoy his company in an adult way they’d never
experienced before. They parted for half an hour, during which she
bought his gift. By the time they’d gotten back home, he’d managed
to avoid crowds and had signed only two autographs the entire day.
Each time someone recognized him, they made a quick escape and
found an entirely new place to shop. He was as adept at acting
pleased to meet his fans as he was at ducking them at first
opportunity.

Holly couldn’t remember a more fun or
sexually charged day. His cologne turned her on and kept her
aroused with each breath she took, and he never stopped touching
her. Either he held her hand as they walked, his palm tucked
against hers, or he cupped the small of her back, steering her this
way and that. Whatever they did, he made certain they were
connected the entire afternoon, and as a result, her body tingled
with awareness.

At the train station in Acton, they slid
into the car and Dylan turned towards her, one hand over her
headrest. “So what next?”

Holly’s heart pounded hard in her chest.
She’d wrestled with this all afternoon, wondering if she could
really have Dylan in her apartment and still be the same when he
returned to L.A. Probably not, but it didn’t matter. Given the
chance to be with him, how could she turn him away?

Her gaze met his. “I still have to finish
decorating my tree. I could make you dinner in exchange for your
help,” she offered.

If he turned down this not-so-subtle
invitation as he had turned her down last night, she was finished
playing his getting-to-know-each-other-again game.

He reached a hand out and caressed her
cheek. “I’d love that,” he said, the smile on his face evident in
his voice.

Tremors of excitement shot through her, and
as he turned the engine over, her stomach rolled with anticipation
at the night to come.

* * *

Whoever said you couldn’t come home again
didn’t know Holly Evans, Dylan thought. Her apartment was cozy and
made him feel welcome and at ease. While she put something together
for dinner, Dylan kept himself busy stringing the lights on her
tree. He couldn’t believe the Holly he knew, who loved Christmas,
hadn’t decorated her apartment before now, but her hectic schedule
was his gain. He put his own touches on her tree, and in doing so
he hoped he was making a definite mark in her life.

He heard her footsteps as she walked in to
join him. His gaze was immediately drawn to the way the tight denim
jeans molded to her hips and thighs. Still slender, she’d filled
out in a womanly way that made him hard just looking at her. It
wasn’t desire alone that beckoned to him but the sense of
fulfillment and belonging he found only with her.

Today had shown him that his memories were
but shadows of reality. Together they could share so much, if he
could convince her to open her heart to him again.

“Hi, there,” he said.

“Hi. Dinner should be ready in about
forty-five minutes. I hope you like frozen lasagne because when I
offered to cook, I forgot I hadn’t been shopping in a while. We’re
lucky I was able to find something to defrost so we could eat at
all.” She knelt down and sat on the hardwood floor.

“I’d have been happy to take you out, but
I’m happier to have more time alone.” He patted the empty space
beside him, but she kept her distance.

She smiled, but after a day of laughter and
relaxed fun, he recognized forced cheer when he saw it. “What’s
wrong?”

She glanced down, rubbing her palms against
her jeans. “I just had some time to think, and I can’t help but
have questions. A lot of them, actually.”

“Like?” he asked, prepared to deal with
whatever was on her mind.

She lifted her gaze to meet his. “Like why
you left so suddenly and why you came back into my life the same
way.”

He nodded slowly, glancing up at the empty
tree top, wondering where to begin. Hoping he wouldn’t push her
further away.

Though she sat cross-legged on the floor
next to him, their easy camaraderie was gone, and she went out of
her way to make sure her bent knee didn’t touch his. She was
waiting for an explanation, and he wondered if anything he said
would make sense—or make a difference to her now.

“You know how badly I wanted to act.”

She nodded. “You said Broadway. We had
plans. Dreams. At least I thought we did, but after you took off, I
convinced myself they’d been
my
dreams and you’d humored
me through high school before moving on.” At times she even thought
that he’d used her, Holly thought.

She bit down on her lower lip, not wanting
Dylan to see the extent to which he’d hurt her. Certainly she
didn’t want him to know his betrayal had probably ruined any chance
she had at trusting any other guy. Now that she was beginning to
understand how deeply he still affected her, in a way she resented
him even more.

He gazed at the needles on the tree as if
they could offer clarity until finally he spoke. “The closer we got
to graduation, the more trying for Broadway and acting in New York
seemed like a sacrifice,” he admitted. “Like I’d be accepting
second choice without even trying for the big-time.”

“So why didn’t you just tell me? Or was I
that much of a burden?” she asked, admitting her fears out loud for
the first time. “Were you afraid I’d hold you back?”

He jerked backward and stared. “Are you
serious? It was just the opposite. I didn’t want to hold
you
back. Your family had dreams and goals for you.
You
had those same dreams.”

Then, at the same time, they both said,
“Yale, like your father and his father before him,” laughing
despite the serious conversation.

“You see? I knew if I told you I wanted to
go to L.A., you’d probably have insisted on going with me. Yes,
there was Stanford or other schools, but none of them were Yale,
and none would uphold your family tradition.”

“Wasn’t that my choice to make? Unless it
was an excuse and you really didn’t want me—”

He grasped her hand hard. “I didn’t want you
to end up resenting me. And in case you need a reminder or proof of
how much I did and still do care, here it is.” Taking her by
surprise, he leaned over and met her lips in a searing, demanding
kiss.

A kiss she both wanted and needed, and this
time she didn’t hesitate. She parted her lips and allowed him
inside. His tongue swirled in her mouth, teasing, tasting and
demanding she understand. And though she still held the pain in her
heart, a part of her accepted the explanation. His kiss and gentle
touch went a long way towards helping her heal.

She placed her hands on his shoulders and
pushed backward. He toppled to the floor, pulling her on top of him
until they lay sprawled beneath her Christmas tree, her legs
tangled with his. Their bodies fit tightly yet perfectly together,
the hard ridge of his erection thrusting upward against her, making
her very aware of his desire, which found a feminine answer inside
her.

She couldn’t deny the aching emptiness only
he could fill or the trickle of desire dampening her panties. She
wanted him. Scarier yet, she needed him.

He stared up at her, his sexy gaze
smoldering with raw passion and emotion she couldn’t mistake. “I
missed you, Holly.”

“I missed you too,” she admitted, and then,
to keep things light, she nipped at his lips with soft kisses and
teasing strokes of her tongue.