Michael Jackson (53 page)

For a month, Janet and James lived at Hayvenhurst with Janet's family, much to James's dismay. ‘He wanted them to have their
own place,’ explained his mother, Etterlene. ‘He felt that they needed to be alone to give themselves a chance to grow in
their marriage. However, Janet didn't want to leave that house. She was still like a little girl, who never wanted to leave
her bedroom.’

‘James DeBarge would come to the house completely out of his mind on drugs,’ Steve Howell remembered. ‘He would be so high
on coke and alcohol that, on two occasions, the guards tried to stop him from going inside Hayvenhurst. “If you do, Mr Jackson
will kill you,” they'd warn him, speaking of Joseph. However, he was belligerent and didn't care. The funny thing was that
when he wasn't high, James was the nicest guy in the world. He was like Dr Jekyll and Mr DeBarge.’

‘You leave my husband alone!’ Janet was heard screaming at Joseph on several occasions.

‘He's not good for
you,
Janet,’ Joseph shot back. ‘And if you think you're going to ruin this family by staying married to this guy, you can forget
it.’

Katherine tried to find a reasonable solution to the problem: she offered to enroll James in a rehabilitation programme. He
refused to go.

In an interview, James DeBarge remembered the Encino estate as ‘The House of Fears’ and painted an eerie picture of Michael,
who was at home for a short time in the middle of the tour schedule. ‘It was while I lived there that I came to realize what
a sad, lonely figure he is,’ James said. ‘He was like a ghost, wandering around the place looking for friendship. He would
come to our room late at night, tap softly on the door, and say, “Is it all right if I come in?” One time, Janet and I were
making love, and he came right on in! He got into bed with us and poured his heart out. He said, “I envy you two, because
you have each other and love each other. But, I haven't got anyone.” There was never a sign of a woman in his life, ever.’

‘He really was a very lonely man-child,’ James DeBarge recalled of his brother-in-law, Michael. ‘The only time he had any
fun was when he had friends over to play in his two-million-dollar amusement arcade, but they had to let Michael win most
of the time. If they didn't, they wouldn't be asked to come back.’

James has a litany of amazing memories about his life in the ‘House of Fears’. He recalls the day it rained and Michael danced
naked around the pool. ‘His mother screamed from the house, “Put your clothes on, Michael. Your father will be home soon.”
Fear of Joseph was what controlled them all,’ James said. (Of course, James was on drugs, so who knows how reliable his memory
is of that time.)

After a few months, James and Janet moved into their own condominium at 12546 The Vista, in Brentwood. ‘They moved out of
the house because Joseph was gonna kill James,’ recalled Steve Howell. ‘I'm serious.’

‘James had it out with Joseph a number of times,’ confirmed his mother, Etterlene. ‘They were enemies. They detested each
other.’

Janet wanted nothing to do with her family as long as they could not accept her husband. Actually, Janet had begun distancing
herself a couple of years earlier when she began working as an actress on the TV show
Fame.
‘My parents were very strict while I was growing up,’ she once told me. ‘It was really our music and our work. We missed
out on our childhood, getting to know what really goes on out there. It was bad, because once you step out there for the first
time, it stuns you. I saw a lot of things I'd never seen before.’

In a short time, Janet was miserable in her new marriage. She had wanted her independence, and she got it, but at what cost?
Now, she found herself staying up nights worrying about James, who was rarely at home.

According to Jerome Howard, Joseph and Katherine's former business manager, ‘Janet would get phone calls in the middle of
the night from James's friends telling her where he was, which was usually out in the ghetto, about twenty-five miles from
Encino, buying or doing drugs. Janet, who'd never been there in her lifetime, would get up and drive out to the ghetto to
find him. In time, she got to know the ghetto better than any other Jackson. She loved him and would do anything for him.’

With the entire Jackson family opposed to the marriage, each member took turns trying to persuade Janet to end it with James.
The problems the newlyweds were having in their marriage, especially the drugs, went against everything Michael stood for
personally and spiritually. Besides, he could see what the marriage had done to his sister emotionally. At one point she collapsed
and had to be rushed to a hospital. She was exhausted, physically and emotionally. Michael was the only person to whom she
would now listen. He begged her to leave James, crying on the phone with her from different stops along the Victory tour.
Janet was finally convinced.

‘God, I felt like my whole life was falling down, and I could see him [James] going down, but there was nothing I could do,’
Janet said. ‘And he said to me, “Well, you haven't tried to help me,” but I thought, What about helping yourself? I thought,
Well, I can either go down with him and that's the end of my life, or I can let go and continue on, alone.’

Janet left James on 7 January 1985, and immediately filed for a petition to nullify her marriage and restore her former name,
Janet Dameta Jackson. On the petition, she listed her total gross monthly income as just $3000 – a minuscule amount considering
the millions she would earn later. She said the amount of her husband's income was ‘unknown’ to her. When she got home from
the courthouse, she called her friend René Elizondo and said, ‘God, I can't believe what I've just done.’

(The annulment was finally granted on 18 November 1985. By then, Janet was back at Hayvenhurst.)

James claims that Janet terminated a pregnancy while he was married to her. ‘I don't think she told many family members,’
he said, ‘but, her mother knew. I wouldn't have minded a child, but it had to be Janet's decision. I think her career, her
plans, her family had a lot to do with it. We went to a clinic in Los Angeles but we had to go in and out the back door because
we were so well known. It was real scary. Afterward, I took her home and held her in my arms and told her everything would
be okay.’

For years, Janet has dealt with the rumour that she actually did have the baby she was carrying at the time, and that this
child is secretly being raised in Europe. Janet denies it. Of course, she spent almost ten years denying that she was married
to René Elizondo when, the entire time, she actually
was.
It was only when he filed for divorce that the truth came out… would it surprise anyone, then, if Janet Jackson one day reveals
that she and James de Barge had a child so many years ago, and that rather than having an abortion she thought it better if
he or she was raised away from the limelight?

It was difficult to imagine Michael Jackson viewing romantic relationships in a positive light when he was surrounded by such
poor examples. His parents' marriage had rarely been happy. Marlon's marriage to Carol had been troubled, though they had
reconciled. It was difficult to know what was going on with Jermaine's relationship, but Hazel seemed domineering to most
observers. Jackie's marriage was also in trouble at this time, because he had cheated on Enid. The two would end up divorcing,
and the final decree would not occur until August 1987, after they had put each other through as much misery – and litigation – as
possible. Luckily, Tito seemed to be faring well with Dee Dee. Still, Michael had learned early on to be cautious before committing
himself to any relationship that could become serious. Therefore, he stayed alone – except for the occasional youth, such as
Emmanuel Lewis and, in 1984, a ten-year-old kid named Jonathan Spence who had become a constant companion. The two were seen
nuzzling and hugging throughout the fall of 1984.

Along with Michael's huge success came a resurgence of rumours about his sexuality. Michael had always been extremely sensitive
about the issues of sexuality, and nothing annoyed him more than the fact that it kept coming up every few years. Yet, by
September 1984, the question remained: was Michael gay?

However, being a twenty-six-year-old virgin teen idol devoted to a sexually repressive religion is not easy, especially when
show business dictates that a male celebrity be ‘romantically involved’ – to use Michael Jackson's words – with a woman, thus
the existence of Tatum O'Neal and Brooke Shields in his life. But the public could see through those charades, and tongues
continued to wag.

One rumour had it that, when Michael was younger, Joseph had ordered him to be injected with female hormones to ensure that
his voice would not change with maturity. He wanted it to remain high-pitched and, thus, commercial. ‘Not true,’ said Michael's
vocal coach, Seth Riggs. ‘He started out with a high voice, and I've taken it even higher. It's ridiculous. I don't even know
if it's possible to do that.’

During one break in a vocal lesson, according to Seth, he said to Michael, ‘You know, everybody thinks you're gay.’

Michael nodded his head and told Riggs this story: a tall good-looking blond approached him one day and said, ‘Michael, I
think you're wonderful. I sure would like to go to bed with you.’

Michael glared at him. ‘When's the last time you read the Bible?’ he asked.

The blond said nothing.

‘You know, you really should read it, because there is some real information in there about homosexuality.’

‘Sure, I guess if I was a girl, it would be different story,’ said the fellow. ‘
Then
you'd have sex with me.’

‘No, I wouldn't,’ Michael told him. ‘There are some very direct words on
that
in the Bible too.’

Still, there were some odd reports about Michael. For instance, reporter Denise Worrell was writing a story about him for
Time
and had tried to arrange an interview with him, but to no avail. Instead, she interviewed his parents. Unbeknownst to Michael,
Joseph decided to give the reporter a tour of the house. He knocked on Michael's bedroom door. There was no answer. ‘Michael
I have someone I want you to meet,’ Joseph said. He opened the door. ‘Can I bring her into your room?’

Denise reported that Michael was inside with a male friend, about twenty years old, watching television. The glow from the
set was the only light in the room. She noticed the outline of Michael's mannequins against a wall.

Michael was startled by the presence of his father and his guest. He nervously introduced Joseph to his friend, using just
a first name. Michael then shook hands with the journalist who reported that his handshake ‘felt like a cloud’. He ‘barely
said hello’. Michael's friend then nervously extended his hand; she reported that it was ‘damp’. Michael stared at the writer
for a moment and then began watching television, again.

As Joseph and Denise backed out of the room, Joseph had the look of a man who'd just opened Pandora's box. ‘Michael has a
friend over,’ Joseph explained. ‘He isn't about to give any interviews. You got pretty close, though,’ he added, with a nervous
chuckle.

After Denise left the house, a security guard came running after her. Joseph and Katherine wanted to speak to her again. Joseph
must have told his wife what had occurred in the bedroom.

‘We were hoping you'd set the record straight and put a stop to the rumours,’ Katherine said as soon as she saw Denise. ‘They
say Michael is gay. Michael is not gay. It's against his religion. It's against God. The Bible speaks against it.’

‘Michael is
not gay
,’ repeated Joseph, emphatically.

Perhaps Michael is
not gay,
but he was curious about the lifestyle just the same. One friend remembered the day he and Michael went into a gay bar on
Santa Monica Boulevard in West Hollywood. ‘Michael was recording at Larrabe studios, which is across the street from a bar
in a predominantly gay section of Hollywood,’ the friend recalled. ‘I said to him, “Hey, man, let's go get a drink at that
bar.” He told me he didn't drink, but perhaps he could get an orange juice. “You know, it's a gay bar,” I warned him. “Really?
I've never been to a gay bar,” he said. “What goes on there?” he asked. I told him he should go and see for himself. He hesitated.
“Well, I've always wanted to. Okay, let's do it.” So, in we went.

‘“Why is it so dark in here?” Michael wanted to know. I had the impression he had never been in
any
bar, let alone a gay one. There were a few guys in there, but it was early, so there weren't many. Michael took a deep breath
and went up to the bartender and ordered an orange juice. The bartender said, “Hey, aren't you Michael Jackson?” He said,
“Nope. But I'm told I look like him.” He turned to me and winked.

‘He and I sat in a corner and watched all the guys. He was recognized by a few, but they left him alone. Not one person came
up to him.