Mia's Heart (The Paradise Diaries) (21 page)

And
all of a sudden, I see her point. 

I
don’t know why, but it’s like a revelation.

An
epiphany.

Maybe
Gavin was right and I can still be who I am, but I don’t have to announce it to
the world.  Maybe I should fall into rank and do what is expected of
me.  At least part of the time.  It wouldn’t hurt me and it would
make my life easier.  I can do what I want on the side, but still do what
my parents want.  Then I wouldn’t have to butt heads with them. 

Butting
heads with them takes so much energy.

“Okay,”
I say simply. 

My
mother stares at me.

“Okay?”
she’s incredulous. 

I
nod.  “Okay. I’ll try to be more considerate about daddy’s image.  I
don’t mean to be disrespectful.”

My
mother looks like she doesn’t know whether to have a heart attack or whether
she wants to cry and hug me. 

So
she just looks at me with her mouth open. 

“I’m
being serious,” I tell her.  “I’ll try not to keep disappointing you.”

And
she flies into my arms with all the velocity of a raging bull. 

A
tiny raging bull.

“You’re
not a disappointment,” she tells me as she strokes my hair.  “I love you,
Mia.  Thank you for being so understanding. And for trying.”

Holy
cow.  This was easy. 

That’s
all I can think as my little bitty mother cries in my arms.  I’ve made her
so happy by simply not railing against her.  I think Gavin was onto
something.

“I’m
not changing my hair though,” I tell her.  “But I won’t get my nose
re-pierced.”

“Deal,”
my mother smiles.  And it honestly makes me happy to see her happy. 
She’s looked miserable for as long as I can remember.  And probably way
before that.

I
can imagine that I was partially to blame.

“Fresh
slate?” I ask her.  I pull away and look at her face.  Her eyes are
as green as mine.  And hers are wet. 

She
nods.  “Fresh slate.”

I
hug her and am surprised by how good it feels…like a puzzle piece falling into
place, somehow. 

“Mia,”
she says slowly.  “I was dreading telling you this, but maybe it won’t be
so bad now.  There is a benefit tonight at the Old Palace.  It is to
raise money for people who have been the hardest hit by the earthquake. 
There will also be a few awards.  Dimitri is going to give you and the
other kids an award for helping with the clean-up.  You should probably
go.”

I
stare at her.  Obviously, if I’m getting an award, I should go.  But
she seems so nervous about asking me. 

“Holy
cow.  I must have been a monster,” I mutter for the twentieth time this
week.  “Of course I’ll go.  I’m sure Dante and Reece will be there,
too, right?”

Mom
nods.  “Yes.  And Gavin and Quinn, too, among a few others.”

“It’s
black tie?” I ask.  She nods again, looking pained. She’s dreading my
reaction, still.  I smile pleasantly.

“Okay. 
I’ll need to go get a dress. But I look forward to it.”

I
don’t look forward to it, but part of this new leaf that I’ve turned over means
that I will not throw a fit.  My mom looks infinitely relieved. 

“Thank
you, Mia,” she tells me.  She gives me another hug before she
leaves.  And I’m left alone in my bedroom. 

I
text Gavin. 

Are
u going to that benefit dinner tonight?

He
answers,
Yep.  U?

I
reply.
  Yes. Sigh. 

Gavin
comes back with,
Do u want a ride?

I
pause.  I’m sure Dante and Reece will be going, so I can get a ride with
them.  Plus, if I’m honest, I have to admit that I’m still a little
annoyed with Gavin for leaving me like he did last night. 

Yes,
I understand that he was flustered and forgot that I didn’t know what was going
on.  But still.  He left me. 

And
Quinn saved me. 

That
fact isn’t lost on me. 

I
sigh loudly. 

No,
that’s ok.  I’ll catch a ride with Reece and Dante- and I’ll see u
there. 

Gavin
take a little longer to answer this time, but finally comes back with,
Ok. 
And it is accompanied by a frownie face. 

I
don’t know why I just did that.  I honestly don’t.  But for some
reason, all I can think about today is Quinn.  And how he looked as he
plunged into the water to carry me out. 

It
makes my heart flutter. 

Gavin
makes me feel safe because he knows me. But Quinn makes me feel safe because I
feel like he would never let anything happen to me.  Not that I need a
protector, because I don’t.  But it’s still a nice feeling. 

I
duck out of my room to find Reece.  I find her, along with Dante and
Quinn, out on the porch sipping at fresh lemonade. 

Reece
looks up, concern apparent on her face. 

“How
are you doing?” she asks worriedly.  I stare at her.

“What
do you mean?  I’m fine.  Shouldn’t I be?”

Now
she’s the one who is confused. 

“The
pictures,” she says slowly.  “And your mom was so upset.  I bumped
into her in the hall earlier.”

“Oh,”
I answer.  “She’s okay now.  I told her that I would try to stop
being such a challenge for her. And I haven’t seen the pictures.  Should I
see them?”

Reece
looks uncertain and she glances at Dante. 

“There’s
no reason you need to,” he tells me.  “It would just make you upset. 
It’s our fault anyway.  We should have reminded you that this happens to
us sometimes.”

“Particularly
when Dante is around,” Reece interjects. 

“But
this will blow over,” Dante adds.  “It always does.  By this time
next week, the gossip sites will be on to something else.”

“You’d
think that with all the real news with the earthquake, they’d report about
that,” Quinn mutters.  “Not some teenagers at a party.”

“I
couldn’t agree more,” Dante answers.  “But these websites are toxic and
gossipy.  They don’t care about the real news.  They just want things
that will make people’s tongues wag.”

“Like
Mia standing in the sea topless,” Quinn rolls his eyes and I cringe at his
words. 

“Please
tell me that they didn’t get a shot of my girls,” I plead.  And by girls,
of course I mean my boobs.  Reece looks pained.

“Well,
your girls are blurred out.  But yes.  It’s clear that you’re
topless.”

I
cringe again.  But there’s nothing to be done.  The damage is already
done. 

I
square my shoulders. 

“Okay. 
I’m putting it out of my mind,” I announce.  “So what if half of Caberra
has seen my girls now—I’ve got to think about other things.  Are you guys
going to the benefit tonight at the Old Palace?”

They
all nod.  I turn to Reece.  “I’ve got to go get a dress.  Are
you up for a short shopping excursion?”

“Of
course,” she answers.  “I have to get a dress, too.”

“Perfect,”
I smile.  Dante is already handing over his car keys, the ever-perfect,
ever-dutiful boyfriend.  He pulls Reece to him and kisses her on the
forehead, warning her to be careful on the curves. She smiles sweetly and tells
him she will.  And then she takes the curves too fast, anyway. 

Twenty
minutes later, we’re shopping. Which is apparently one thing that hasn’t
changed about me.  I will always love to shop.

* * * * * * * *

At
5:45 p.m., I’m standing in front of the mirror in my room.  I look pretty
hot, I have to admit. My hair is pulled into a chignon and I like the way the
pink streaks show.  My dress is black and soft and clings to my curves,
falling just above my knee.  My shoes are kick-ass three inch heels with
cute straps that criss-cross part-way up my calves.  I’m even wearing a
strand of my mom’s pearls.  She was incredibly and amazingly happy about
that.  I wonder if I used to realize how little it would take to make her
happy? 

When
it’s time to go, Dante, Reece, Quinn and I pile into Dante’s Maserati. 
Quinn and I are crammed into the backseat, which seems even smaller than it
normally would because Quinn is so enormous.  He takes up way more than
half of the space.  He just sprawled out and then laughed at me because he
had pinned me against the seat.  But if I’m honest, I will admit that I
enjoy being crushed up against him. 

He
grins down at me, almost as if he can read my mind. 

And
I can see that he’s enjoying the cramped quarters too.  He stretches his
arm out behind me and I curve into his shoulder. 

And
I like it. 

I’m
not gonna lie.

Dante
drives quickly into town.  Like, bat-out-of-hell quickly. And that is too
quickly because I’m enjoying the heat from Quinn’s body.  Reece cringes as
we cruise smoothly through the curves, but I don’t blame her.  It’s where
Dante had his car accident last summer.  

I
pause.

Did
someone tell me that?  Or was that a memory?  I sigh.  It’s
confusing sometimes.  This amnesia thing really, really sucks.  But
it does seem like my memory is coming back in bits and pieces.

When
we arrive, I can see Dante’s security detail following us.  They’ve been
really good about trying to be inconspicuous.  But in light of the
assassination attempt last year, they are being very careful now. Particularly
tonight, with all of these people swarming about.  They aren’t letting
Dante out of their sight.

“I’m
going to find my father,” Dante says.  “I’ll meet up with you
later?”  I nod and Reece leaves with Dante.  The security detail
follows.  Quinn and I are left alone.

Again.

I
look at him. 

Then
I look at the lines waiting to get into the Old Palace’s ballroom. 

“I
know a short cut,” I tell him.  And then we both stare at each
other. 

“You
do?” Quinn asks, one eye-brow raised.  “And you remember it?”

“I
do,” I confirm in a whisper.  “I remember it.”

The
weird thing is that the memory just sort of appeared.  It didn’t spring
out of nowhere with a big announcement.  It’s like it was just there,
waiting for me to realize that I remember it. 

So.

Strange.

I
turn to Quinn.  “Yes. I do remember,” I repeat.  “Follow me.”

And
we duck behind the lines and through the back hallways.  Security lets us
pass because they recognize me. 

“Have
a good evening, Miss Giannis,” one of them says.  He nods at me and I
smile back.  Quinn and I weave through the empty halls of the Old
Palace. 

“This
building is amazing,” Quinn tells me as we walk through a corridor with a
gilded gold ceiling.  The artwork hanging on the walls is authentic and
expensive and there is exquisite art in every nook and cranny. 

“It
is,” I agree.  “It really is.”

I
wonder if I used to be blasé about it.  After all, I was born and raised
around this stuff.  But I enjoy seeing the wonderment on Quinn’s face as
he takes it all in.  I hope that I remain like he is right now—appreciative
of the beautiful things in life, no matter how many times I see them.

Even
if my memories come back. 

The
ballroom is decorated to the nines in silver and black decorations.  I see
Dante and Reece standing with Dimitri Giliberti toward the front of the room.
He is in a military uniform with a sash, his typical formal dress. 

And
again, that is something that I suddenly remember as though it has been there
all along. 

Which
it has. 

I
just didn’t remember it until now.

I
gulp. 

My
memories returning sporadically and without warning is a total mind
bender.  Seriously, I can barely wrap my mind around it. 

So
instead, I choose to ignore it.

“Would
you like to dance?” I ask Quinn. 

He
stares at me hesitantly. 

“What?”
I cajole him. “The big brawny cowboy can ride a bull but can’t dance?”

And
now he rolls his eyes. 

“Is
that a challenge?”

“Does
it seem like a challenge?” I ask innocently. 

He
sighs and grabs my hand.  “Come on, tiny tot.”

I
smile victoriously as he leads me onto the polished dance floor.  The
crystal chandeliers sparkle above us and servers in black-tails and white
gloves sail through the crowds with trays of champagne. 

Quinn
pulls me to him and we smoothly dance around the ball room floor.  I look
up at him.

“You’re
a surprise,” I admit.  “I figured you couldn’t dance.”