Miah (Lane Brothers #2) (9 page)

“Good. I don’t want—”

“I know, and neither do I, so chill out, big guy. I’ve got us covered.”

I fall asleep with a smile on my face and my girl’s body wrapped around me, right where she should be, letting the other shit go just for now. Tomorrow’s soon enough to worry about catching scum. For now, I just want my good girl to fill me with that content feeling I only have when she’s near.

Clara

I’m freaking walking on clouds and my smile is so wide, it’s starting to get embarrassing since the darn thing won’t leave no matter how hard I try to school my features.

“Darn it, Miah, stop laughing already. Your family is going to take one look at this grin and know what we were doing all night and this morning.”

The man only laughs harder and squeezes me closer to his side, his own mouth smiling so broadly, I’m afraid he’ll hurt himself. To say that the last twelve hours have set a new standard for us is an understatement.

I am now calling this thing a relationship while the maddening nut has progressed to committed and is heading towards a ceremony of some sort. Not that I’m averse to tying the knot one day, just not soon.

Maybe in a year or two, I could dig it, but for right now I’m just basking in the happiness I feel.

              We get to the dining room with our smiles still firmly in place and I want to crawl up my own behind when every member of the family, including Roman, turns to stare.

They all know that I’ve spent the night having sex, I can see it on their faces when they all attempt to hide their smiles but end up laughing when I blush and try to hide behind Miah.

“Come on, babe, let me feed you.” He laughs, making me cringe at the renewed round of chuckles.

“Now you wanna feed her, Iron Man? What about last night when she needed the energy?”

“Shut the hell up, Jared. Hey, Ma, Pop.”

I laugh at that griping snarl along with the others and shake my head when Jace opens his mouth to goad the bear. He winks and zips his lips, giving me one of his rare smiles.

              “You two love birds gonna start making wedding plans?” Wyatt quips, throwing Miah the bird when he growls and gnashes his teeth.

“No. And mind your own business, asshole.”

“Jeremiah Lane, language!” Jude admonishes before turning my way.

“No wedding? What the hell are you saying?”

She looks so horrified at the loss that I can’t help but laugh and shake my head solemnly.

“Not yet, Jude. I just want to be happy with what we have and forget the serious stuff for now,” I say gently, smiling at Miah when he takes my hand in his and squeezes.

“But…I bought a ring!”

That has everyone howling with laughter and even she realizes her faux pas and starts laughing eventually.

“Really, Ma? You bought my girl a ring? You don’t trust me to do it right?”

Ellie is giggling and winks at Jude with a smile that poor Wyatt does not appreciate.

“Jude bought me a ring, too, but Mr. Possessive over here refused to let me wear it with the one he got me, so I wear it on a chain instead.”

“You’re
my
wife,” Wyatt gripes, throwing his mother a look.

“Oh pooh! You’re just mad because mine is bigger than yours.”

I don’t know how we all get through breakfast with her antics and the laughter that’s going around, but by the time I’m ready for work, I feel like I’m not just walking on clouds but floating through air.

I should have known it wouldn’t last.

***

“Miss Clara Elms?”

I answer in the positive and sip my tea while Miss Gruber, the science teacher, tries to appear as if she’s not listening to my conversation.

“This is Hannah Chase. I’m calling from Philadelphia Department of Social Services, ma’am.”

“Um, okay. How can I help you, Miss Chase?”

I really hope none of the kids at the old school are hurt or anything, because as much as I love my new class, I won’t ever forget the ones who came before.

“Well, Miss Elms, I’m very sorry to have to tell you this, but it seems that your mother, a Miss Mary Elms, passed two days go. As next of kin, we’re calling to ask if you’re willing to take guardianship of your brother, Joshua Elms.”

The news hits me like a slap to the face and a kick to my solar plexus. I’m so shocked by this news that I can’t answer for a good minute or two before I finally find my voice.

“Brother?”

“Yes, ma’am. Josh is almost four years old, ma’am. It seems that he was in his father’s care till just recently when Mr. Jeffries passed in a motorcycle accident. Miss Elms took him in, but with her…passing, you’re the only one left to contact. Will you take him in?”

Take him in? I can’t even process the fact that I have a baby brother, never mind think of becoming a mother to an almost four-year-old kid I’ve never met.

“Um…”

“We completely understand if you’re not in a position to accept this responsibility, Miss Elms, especially considering that little Josh is autistic and in need of special care, which it seems his mother did not provide for him while he was in her care.”

No shock there
, I think sardonically, struck anew by the irony that Mary has another kid and never bothered to tell me. To hear that she passed away is painful, because no matter how at odds we were, the woman was still my mother and I loved her in my own way.

A brother, though…in need of a guardian…

“If you decline, we will understand. In fact, I’ve taken the liberty of lining up a few good foster families who are familiar with caring for children with special needs.”

              “No, uh, I’ll come down there immediately and sort this all out. Um, let me give you my e-mail address so you can send me the details.”

I ring off feeling numb and drained by this turn of events. I just started a relationship, one in which Miah and I agreed we did not want kids, at least not for the foreseeable future, and now I have to call him and tell him I’m about to become a mother to a four-year-old little boy who seems to need a lot more than just parents.

I decide not to call him immediately and leave school under the guise of a family emergency after calling Jude and begging a lift.

“Clari, dear, what’s wrong?”

We’re almost home by this time, and she keeps giving me sidelong glances filled with concern. I can’t say I blame her since I must look like I just saw a ghost and am losing my marbles.

“I…I need to call Miah, and…I need to talk to Miah.”

“Okay, honey. Would you like me to call him and get him home?”

I nod. It’s all I can manage when she leaves me at the stairs and runs off towards the study at the end of the long hall. The trip upstairs is a blur and I only come to when half a bag is packed and I’ve got tears streaming down my face.

That’s how he finds me. When he takes me into his arms, his eyes filled with concern, I can’t help but cling to him and sob.

“Clari, babe, what’s wrong?”

I cry harder, not wanting to tell him, not ready to lose him yet because of something that I shouldn’t resent but silently do. The sentiment is not fair to poor Josh and I know it, but it doesn’t make this any better.

“I…my mom died.”

“Oh, babe, I’m so sorry.”

“No, it’s not, I’m not crying because of that, Miah.”

He watches me carefully, waiting for me to explain.

“I have to go to Philly and fetch my baby brother, Joshua, who has autism and doesn’t have anyone else.” I wipe my nose with my sleeve. “So you see, I need to pack all my stuff before I get to the airport.”

He stiffens and pushes me away.

“What the fuck are you talking about, Clari? You only need an overnight bag and then we’ll ask Wyatt for his jet so we can get to Philly quicker. That poor kid must be terrified and alone. Man oh man, Ma is going to be in seventh heaven about this shit.”

“Miah?”

He jogs to the closet and comes back out with an overnight bag and his shaving kit and I’m still struggling to grasp what the heck is going on here.

“What’s up, babe? Listen, I think we should call Wyatt’s attorney and let him meet us at the airfield so as to get this stuff squared away as quickly as possible. Oh, and I think we should get Jared to come with just in case that asshole Grimes makes an appearance.”

He’s already on the phone and making plans. I take the time to center myself and get my thoughts in order.

“Babe?”

“Miah, I…I’m a little confused here. I thought…I thought you didn’t want kids, and…you know that if I take custody of Josh that I’m going to be a mom, right?” I ask hesitantly, more than little out of my depth here.

He rolls his eyes and pulls me in for a hug and a quick kiss that leaves me wanting more.

“Clari, your little brother is even now sitting somewhere with strangers, scared and alone and God knows what else. We need to go get him. Oh, and if you’re about to make some cockamamie statement about how you thought this would scare me off, I suggest you keep it inside under lock and key, because even suggesting that this would end us will just piss me off. Now come on, Jared is going to meet us at the airfield along with the attorney.”

“I think I love you, Jeremiah Lane,” I whisper, smiling through the tears trailing down my cheeks.

He smiles back and kisses me again before pulling me behind him.

“Don’t say it unless you know it for sure, because I know I love you and I want nothing less in return.”

“I know I love you, Miah.”

“I love you, too. Now stop bawling and get a move on, woman. We have a kid to get, and Jesus, you’re calling Ma from the plane to tell her about her new grandbaby. I’d rather chew my own leg off than listen to her squeal for an hour straight.”

I take his advice and don’t say a word to Jude before we’re well underway and far enough way that her screams won’t deafen us all. Poor George.

“I’ll arrange everything, Clari. Don’t you fret. My tennis buddy Jill has a grandson with autism and she knows everything about it, so we’ll put our heads together and make sure that everything is perfect when Joshie comes home.”

That goes on for a good hour before a laughing Miah finally takes the phone and tells Jude that she’s overwhelming me.

“Babe, when Ma gets that way, it’s just best to cut that shit short and save yourself more pain.” He chuckles, falling into the seat beside me and slinging one arm across my shoulders.

Jared is also smiling and I’m relieved to notice that he, like his family, does not seem averse to taking in my brother who happens to be… God, I hope he likes me enough not to go nuts. I’ve seen those programs on TV about kids with this condition, and it would really suck if he were to hate me.

“It’ll be okay, Clari. You’ll see. You’ll be lucky if Ma lets any of us near her newest baby, not to mention that Josh now has four uncles who’ll adore him and a grandpa who’ll have to fight Ma just to take the kid fishing and man him up a little.”

“You’re so sweet, Jared.” I sniffle, still reeling from it all.

How is it possible for me to have found this family? If any of this had happened a few weeks ago, I would be a wreck just wondering how I’d keep a roof over our heads and get my brother the care he’d need while I’m at work. Now it seems like they’re all lining up willingly to welcome us into the family, and…I’m just overwhelmed.

              “Deep breaths, babe. There you go, just take some nice deep breaths and forget whatever nonsense is running around in that pretty head of yours, okay? We’ll do just fine, and if not, well we’ve always got Jude to fix these kinds of things,” Miah croons when I start hyperventilating.

I suddenly imagine Jude holding up paint samples in a guest bedroom and the thought makes me giggle.

“See, that’s better.” He pulls me closer and I start to feel a hundred times better.

I love kids. I can relate to them. I can guide them. I’m just not sure I know how to be a mother to them.

Miah

The kid looks half-starved and crabby as hell when we finally get through all the paperwork and that uppity Chase woman brings him out to us. I love him immediately and can tell from the way that Clari’s face softens that she’s also in deep from just one look.

The kid’s hair is a messy shag of carroty brilliance and his eyes are the exact same shade of green that brings me joy every morning.

His mulish expression is priceless and a feat since he steadfastly refuses to meet our eyes or respond to anything being said.

“Hi, Josh.”

Clari keeps crooning and goes down on her haunches to try and catch his eye, but the kid just grunts and turns away with a sneer that I’d find amusing if not for the fact that Clari’s eyes just started tearing up and it looks like she’s about to start bawling all over again.

Like I need this shit after only just getting her sniffles under control. The way I’m feeling right now, Mary Elms is lucky she passed from an overdose or I’d have brought Ma down here to take care of her lying self.

“Hey, Josh, buddy, I’m Clari, your sister.”

She keeps trying and failing and the more he turns away, the harder it’s getting for me to just stand here and watch her shoulders sag in defeat. I’m just about ready to start pulling out my hair when Jared walks in.

              And wouldn’t you know it, the little terror takes one look at Jared and runs past Clari’s open arms, making a beeline for my grinning ass of a sibling.

The kid flings himself at the meathead and starts babbling a mile a minute, his gibberish so high pitched and indecipherable that all I can do is shrug when Jared throws me a questioning look.

“Me Josh.”

“Good to meet you, Josh. I’m your uncle Jared. You ready to go home now, buddy?”

That gets a nod and Josh’s arms go around his neck like two clinging vines that I don’t see coming off anytime soon.

“Oh brother. That is not going to be a good combination,” Clari mutters, pursing her lips in chagrin. “What’s up with that?”

“Don’t hate the player, Clari,” Jared sings over his shoulder, grinning from ear to ear when Josh mimics him and finally looks down at Clari with a smile.

“Me Josh.”

Her smile finally bursts free and I decide not to beat Jared after all for that little betrayal. All I care about now is getting my family home and ensuring that they’re all okay while I wrap shit up as soon as possible.

I can’t have this shit still clouding the air now that we have a kid to look after and another one on the way with Ellie about to pop. And I know just what to do to ensure that I’m here for them and not lying dead.

It looks like my military days are officially over, but the thought doesn’t bother me.

“Me Josh.”

The tyke is grinning from ear to ear every time he says it, which is like every five minutes on the minute, and I groan at the thought of the flight home.

Since he seems so taken with Jared, maybe I can take my Clari to the little bedroom at the back and play hooky for at least an hour before Ma starts calling incessantly.

***

“You can’t quit in the middle of an operation, Lane.”

Jared rolls his eyes at me across the table and outright laughs at the colonel when the old fart starts blustering and throwing threats my way.

“It’s done and done, old man, so you can stop trying to threaten me with some bullshit or whatever it is you think you can do. I just told you I have a woman and kid who I can’t involve in this shit, and that, as they say, is that.”

I really don’t want to do this stuff anymore if it means being deployed at the drop of a hat and having to leave my girl.

The decision wasn’t all that hard to make. What I’ll do after this is anyone’s guess, but I’ve been mulling over the idea of staying on the force once this corruption business is settled.

“Goddammit, Lane, who the hell am I supposed to trust with this? You’re already in with your flimsy IA cover and that cousin of yours is practically a member of their little band.”

“Not my problem anymore, dude, and you know it. Keep threatening me and I’ll let my pop call the vice president. They’re golfing buddies, you know, and Pop contributes to their campaigns, so…”

I leave the statement trailing and roll my eyes at Jared who seems to be enjoying the colonel’s obvious distress. Leave it to Jared to tag along when he shouldn’t even be privy to the mission.

That’s my brother for you. He enjoys rocking the boat and watching the idiots inside struggle to stay dry. To top it off, I had to sneak out of the house at four to lose Roman, who seems to think that being a cop gives him military privilege or something.

“Fine. At least give me access to Roman, you little shit,” the man says, throwing me a seething glare.

I’ve known the guy since I joined the navy after dropping out of college. My parents still don’t know that the only reason I earned that degree in business communication was because this man gave me special consideration and pulled a few strings while still keeping me in the field.

Hardest two years of my life juggling all that work, but I made it. Hey, maybe I could go into business with Wyatt…but nah, I’d never survive a suit and tie five days a week and we all know it.

“You can have Roman if he agrees, and only under the condition that you take care of my brother,” I warn.

Roman would love this, but I would never sacrifice him just to make my life easier, and definitely not to take down a few corrupt cops and kill a militia.

If the colonel wants this so bad, he’ll play by my rules, and to hell with what he wants.

“Deal. Now get the hell out of here and tell your gorgeous mother I said hello.”

“You want George to kill you, old man?”

“Some things are worth dying for, son, and don’t you forget that. Now skedaddle, I have an op to plan.”

Jared follows at a slow pace and sits silently all the way home before turning to me with a questioning look.

“You’re sure you’re okay with this? You loved being a SEAL.”

“Bro, I’m more than okay. Clari needs me to keep things together, and that kid is not going to be easy to get to know if he doesn’t trust me because I’m never home.”

“That’s just it, Miah. You always said you would never leave the SEALs, and you don’t want kids, and now what? You’re willing to give it all up for them?” he argues, watching me closely as we pull into the garage and I cut the engine.

“I’d give everything up to keep her, bro. I love Clari, and with the right effort, I’ll get Josh onboard, too. What, you don’t want Clari and Josh—”

“Don’t be an, asshole. I love them both and you know it. I’m just worried that you’ll look back and regret this is all. What will you do now?”

I understand his doubt, hell I’ve been struggling to figure it all out myself before I decided to just let it go and go with the flow. This just seems so right that I can’t bring myself to doubt it.

“I might stay on the force with Roman, or maybe open a business. I don’t know yet. What I do know is that if those assholes find out who I really am, my family will suffer for it and I won’t have that,” I tell him, exiting the car with a huff.

“Good. Now go do something with your woman while I go spend some time with my nephew. That kid is wicked smart and he’s teaching me how to build these cool 3D puzzles that look like real buildings.”

I wave him off and run into the house with a smile. It’s Saturday, and if Jared’s willing to stop stalking Paulette Hayes long enough to keep Josh occupied, I know just how I want to spend the afternoon with my girl.

“Clari!”

“Yeah?” she asks, popping her head around the living room door with a frown. “What? What’s wrong?”

“Nothing. Jared wants to steal Josh for the afternoon, so…”

She starts smiling and throws herself at me, giggling when I start smooching her and almost dump us both down the stairs in my zeal.

“You want to play hooky with me all afternoon?” I purr, biting gently into the din of her neck while kicking the bedroom door closed behind us.

She sighs and licks over my lips, moaning low in her throat.

“Always.”

We fall onto our bed in a tangle of arms, legs and tongues, and I’m inside her minutes later, groaning at the pleasure to be found only here with her, inside her warm and welcoming body.

“Love you.”

I love her, too. So much. I just have to figure a way to make things right so she can live without looking over her shoulder.

***

Clara

The next few weeks are claimed by work, getting Josh adjusted to his new environment, and trying to keep track of Miah. His caseload seems to have doubled, and we’re lucky to see each other at all lately.

Roman’s also missing in action, and Jared only ever smiles when he’s with Josh. The Lane family seems to be falling apart right before my eyes, and it’s starting to give me an ulcer as I wonder what’s happening.

I’m drifting and ashamed of myself for feeling angry about Miah having to work, while also trying to bond with Josh at the same time. Part of my unhappiness stems from the fact that he doesn’t seem all that taken with me.

He adores Jared and doesn’t stop chattering from the time the guy walks in the room to the time I manage to get him to bed. He loves Jude, too, and while he’s not as animated with her as he is with Jared, he spends a lot of time with her in the garden and sorting through color swatches or her next big project.

Wyatt and Ellie aren’t even present most days, because she’s about ready to drop and spend a lot of time in bed as per doctor’s orders. That leaves me at loose ends most of the time, and it’s starting to wear on me not knowing what’s happening with Miah.

The bed dips beneath me and I snuggle back when his lips meet my neck and he starts kissing his way to my lips.

“Hey, babe.”

“Hi. You look tired.”

He sighs wearily and kisses me before falling to the bed beside me with a groan.

“I am. Dobson’s got me pulling doubles ever since I told him and Cates to go bugger themselves last week. I hope Roman catches that old asshole with his hands so deep in that militia cookie jar, they slam it shut at the wrist.”

His words sound reasonable, and while I don’t believe he’s lying, exactly, I think he’s using it as an excuse to cover up his real goals, which Ellie confessed seems to be trying to get some resolution on this whole family versus militia thing.

“You’re still going after the militia, aren’t you?”

That gives him pause and I feel him tense beside me.

“Clari—”

“Miah, don’t lie to me. I’m not mad, and if you’ll recall, I was against you leaving the SEALs and giving up on this mission. You’re the one who insisted you quit and drop it all. If you’re back to that, then just say so so that you’re not sneaking around trying to get it all done. You’re killing yourself keeping it all separate. Plus, I hate that you never tell me anything anymore.”

His yawn is loud enough to wake the dead, and I smile despite my annoyance at his tactics.

“Go to sleep, Lane. It’s already three thirty. We’ll talk later in the morning.”

He complies with nothing more than a sigh and an arm wrapped around me that pulls me closer. I’m the one left sleepless while he snores softly beside me, and by the time I drift off just as dawn is coming, I have a plan that I think may work.

If the Lane boys are willing to listen, that is.