Merger (25 page)

He must have sensed the change in me
by the way I sat brooding, as he put it. His hand remained in mine and he gave it a slight squeeze.

“Uh oh,” he said
. “I can almost feel your thoughts. Did the use of the word ‘love’ throw you off, K.K.?” We zoomed up the Pacific Coast Highway, and I prayed that Malibu wasn’t that far away. I need to get some air into my lungs.

“Not at all, your dog will love me, just like you do.” I repeated, trying to sound confident and unaffected by any use of that word
.

“Yes
, she will. What if I do love you?” he asked.

I felt my heart seize, then gallop in one fail swoop
.
Was he for real?
How would I answer? Was I ready to admit that I loved him? I didn’t know if honesty was the best policy right now. It was early in our relationship and while we’d virtually been together every waking moment since I’d come back to New York, I was nervous that I’d scare him off, or worse, rejection.

“What if you did?
” I was fidgeting in my seat and looking anywhere but at him.

I knew a question to his question wasn’t what he wanted, but it was the best I could come up with at that moment
. My tongue felt thick and tied, and my throat parched. Then all of a sudden we were on the side of the road screeching to a halt, my body flying forward as I truly gripped his hand and was grateful for the seatbelt across my body.

“Look at me
,” He said. He wasn’t asking, he was demanding.

“Are you fucking crazy?” I asked
, now fully looking into his eyes.

“Yes K.K.
, I am fucking crazy. I am fucking crazy about you.” I almost feel him tremble in my hand and I know that I’d stirred the hornet’s nest.

“Okay
. You’re crazy about me. Then why are you so hell bent on killing me in this very expensive car I might add.” My eyes were not wavering.

I knew it drove him crazy when I didn’t look at him, but damn, he said and did things that rendered by speechless and stupid
. Sometimes there was just no room for his intense eyes on me, and then times like now I couldn’t imagine wanting them anywhere else.

“I’m not trying to kill you
, K.K. I’m trying to gauge how you feel about me. I’m falling in love with you and I want to know that you feel it too. You’re like a magnet to me. I’ve never felt like this and I want you like I’ve never wanted anything.” His words were powerful on my heart.

I sat in the car staring at him
, in awe of his omission and thinking about how my hand had now turned hot and sweaty beneath his. My heart was hammering in my chest and I felt like I was going to start crying, but the tears never came. I was happy, and so overwhelmed and I just sat there shaking in my seat looking at the most beautiful overpowering man in the world.

“Come here.
” He pulled me over to his side of the car with me still seated, on one thigh, but stretched within an inch of his face. “Tell me how you feel? I want to know I’m not just dreaming.”

I released my hand from his grip and brought my hands to his face
. “I feel it too. You’re not dreaming.” I pulled him into my lips and slowly floated my tongue in his mouth, begging for his in return. He pulled me closer and moaned into my kiss.

“Don’t break me
, Josh,” I whispered as we came out of our kiss.

“Never
,” he whispered back.

We roared back onto the highway and it was only minutes before we’d hit the mile marker indicating that we were now in the city limits of Malibu
. Houses of various sizes lined the beach. I knew without a doubt that this was a very pricey piece of real estate indeed and wondered if Josh lived on the beach or on the hill overlooking it. I didn’t have to wait long for the answer. We pulled into a stunning and very large house that sat on the beach. It had a somewhat modern look to the outside. All glass and white stucco. The house sat on a cliff, with the main entry and garage on the second level. There appeared to be three levels in all; it was substantial and boasted an ocean view and a vast amount of windows.

Josh hit a button on his visor causing the three
-car garage door to slowly rise. The garage was immaculate, with special mats covering the entire floor. Two other cars were parked inside, one which I caught a glimpse of as we pulled in, as possibly being a red Ferrari and a very large black seven series BMW. This man took his cars seriously. Too bad he drove like a maniac.

“Home sweet home
,” he said. He reached over and kissed my head. “I’ll get the bags in a minute. Let’s get you something to eat and see my baby.” He released my hand and we both opened the doors to step out. Josh jumped to his feet as I tried to find my legs underneath me, but grateful for solid ground. He all but ran around the car, rushed towards me, and scooped me up into his strong muscular arms.

“This might be a bit much don’t you think?” I said smiling
.

“Absolutely not.
” He replied.

We
stood in the garage oblivious to the outside world when I heard a car door shut behind me. I craned my neck around to see who had pulled up in the driveway behind us.

“Am I interrupting something?”
she questioned mildly playful with a hint of sarcasm and I know instantly she and I were going to have a problem. It was Megan, the friend/dog and house watcher that Josh was so keen to have as an assistant.
Lucky me
.

“Not at all
,” Josh said with me firmly locked against his chest, turning to walk through the door to enter his house. I knew without a doubt that being in his arms was the absolute best place to be.

Josh
lavished me with a supple kiss before setting me on my feet. I steadied myself and watched as Josh dropped to his knees. Suddenly there was a click of toenails on the hardwood floors and in ran Daisy the Basset Hound, barreling towards her Daddy.

“Hey girl
!” She shook spastically around his legs, not knowing whether to get her back or belly, and throwing her body from fully standing then on to her back over and over again.

“She was such a good girl while you were away, Josh
. I walked her on the beach everyday while you were gone,” Megan said, looking at Josh and avoiding eye contact with me.

“Thanks Meg, I really appreciated you watching her.
” I couldn’t help but notice that he’d shortened her name in a less than professional manner. She was clearly more friend that colleague and I wondered if they’d ever explored dating. I was having a very girly moment.

She was very attractive in an L.A. kind of way
—all legs and blonde hair, big boobs, and one meal shy of anorexia. I looked at her and knew, like the dog on the floor that I would need to exert my dominance now.

“Hi, I’m Kasey Blakely, and you are
…?” I asked. I knew who she was, but I wasn’t going to give her the benefit of thinking she was important enough for Josh to have made an effort to mention her.

“Oh,” she said
. “I’m Megan White. I work at Crawford as Josh’s assistant. We’re also really good friends.” She smiled and I knew it was for my benefit not Josh’s. How good, I wondered, but smiled politely and turned to look at Josh who was rising from the floor and walking my way.

In unison
, Megan and I both went to kneel to call for Daisy. I looked to her and felt a sigh of relief come over me as Daisy barreled into me, leaving Megan empty handed. I’d never been in a position to feel so jealous and rolled my eyes at my subtle, but not so subtle behavior. However, I was thrilled when Daisy picked me first.

“Hey, sweet girl
,” I said rubbing her belly as her leg pumped up and down. “Who’s the sweet baby?” I said as she moved from her belly to kiss my nose. Josh stood over the three of us, then pulled me up from the floor to face him.

“Looks like you’re here for good
,” he said, kissing me deeply and as I forgot about the two bitches on the floor.

“Well, Josh, I brought the food over that you ordered
. Will you be into the office this afternoon?” she asked, a tone of distraction hitting me in the back. Josh didn’t take his eyes from me as he answered.

“No
. Not today.”

I could hear the tap of her shoes against the wood floor and knew she was making her way out the door and I was relieved
. I turned and looked at her.

“Thanks for dropping off lunch and watching Josh’s dog
. We’ll see you tomorrow at work. It was a pleasure to meet you, Megan.”

She tried her hardest to form
a joyful response, but failed, and said nothing. I would definitely need to fire her at some point and I’d imagined she’d not make it too hard.

“Yeah thanks
, Meg. You’re the best.” Josh followed her out, handing her money for what I assumed was the food and then reemerged with our luggage.

“Let me get you some food and then we take a tour of my place.” He walked over to the cabinet, taking out two plates
.

“Can I help?” I asked
.

“Not a chance
. You sit.” I took my seat and watched as he maneuvered around the kitchen collecting all the necessary glasses and utensils and organizing the perfect place setting in front of both barstools.

“I love your domesticity
. You really are quite the catch you know?”

He walked around and sat next to me
. He grabbed the underneath of my stool and pulled me within inches of him. I knew we’d be hitting elbows through the entire meal, but I was so happy to be next to him, I didn’t complain or move over.

“I hope I’m caught then
,” he grinned as he pulled the Styrofoam containers out of a plastic bag.

“Hamburgers
?” I asked as he opened each container.

“Yes ma’am, but not just any hamburger
. These are the best damn hamburgers you will ever put in your sweet mouth. They have melted blue cheese and bacon on Kobe beef. Pure luxury baby.” I laughed at his proud lunch selection and then looked back up to his waiting face.

“Luxury indeed
. Looks like maybe we shouldn’t have missed our morning workout.

“Don’t worry
. I can think of a few ways to work off the calories.” He winked and then nudged my shoulder playfully. I licked my lips just thinking of the possibilities and grabbed for my burger.

It was massive in size and I couldn’t quite find the right attack
. I turned it over, then sideways before setting it back into the carton.

“Oh good lord, it
’s a hamburger K.K., and I’ve seen your mouth in action. Pick it up and eat it.” I rolled my eyes, putting my hand over the top of the bun and pressing my full palm onto the burger. I smashed it down and watched as the melted blue cheese oozed out the sides. I picked it back up and took my first delicious bite.

“Oh wow, that is good
,” I was looking at Josh and apologetically covering my mouth with my hand for talking with my mouth full.

“I know, I told you.
” I nodded my head up and down and continued eating.

We devour
ed the delicious food and after a long day of packing, flying, and now a full stomach, I found myself yawning. Josh stood up and began gathering up our plates.

“I’m going to clean this stuff up and then I’ll give you the tour
. How’s that sound?”

I
was a captive audience. Who’d have thought that a week ago I’d run into this stunningly handsome man and now I was on the opposite side of the country on the first day of a two-week stay?

“Come with me.
” He walked around the counter holding his hand out for me to take. I stood, thinking that he’d lead and I’d follow, but then he pulled me close and planted a devouring kiss on me. I felt weak in the knees at his powerful touch. When he released my mouth, I gazed up into his beautiful eyes.

“Mmm
,” I purred and laid my head on his chest.

“I’m sorry, I just can’t quit touching you
. I’m so glad you’re here.” He continued to kiss my head over and over—my forehead, my cheeks, my eyes, and everything in between, like a parent loving kisses a child.

“I am too
, baby,” I replied.

“Come with me beautiful.
” I wasn’t sure if I was going to get the tour or not and at this point, I really didn’t care. The heat from his touch had me withering. I held his hand tight as he led me on a tour of his amazing home.

“This is the main floor that were on now and three level in all
. There are three bedrooms upstairs each with its own full bath. The master is on this floor, along with a formal living room and you saw the hearth room attached to the kitchen. I have a home office on the main floor, down that hall,” he said, pointing to a long hall on the right of us as we continued hand-in-hand walking through the house. “Downstairs I have a theater room, home gym and a game room slash bar. I love to have friends over. It’s a fun entertaining house. As you can see from the wall of windows on every floor, it has a great view of the Pacific.”