Mended (9 page)

“Have her home by eleven. Lucky broad,” Jake mutters then shuts the door behind him.

Cole holds my hand to his lips. “I need to tell you something.” I look up at him and wait. “I got confirmation that Rodrigo is dead.”

“Oh, that’s—that’s, wow.”

I’m…I don’t know what I am.

Cole nods. “One down, one to go.”

“Three,” I correct him, thinking my father needs to be taken out. I grab my jacket and purse.

Cole wraps his arm around my waist, walking me to the door. “Okay, no more talk about that shit. Tonight is about you and me.” I lean up and kiss him on the jaw, one of my favorite places.

“Okay.”

***

“I can’t believe it!” Zack claps his hands together as we walk into the restaurant. “Finally, you two are on a real date! Please come, I’ve saved the best table.” Cole helps me remove my jacket, running his hand down my back and swiping over the curve of my backside.

“This is going to be hard,” he growls in my ear. I smile and turn around, conveniently grinding my bottom into his stone-hard erection. I look over my shoulder.

“It already is, baby.” I bite my lip, fighting back the lust that’s battling with my rational side. We
are
in public. He sucks in a breath as I take my seat. He lets it out as he slips across from me in the booth.

“Hi, Savi.” Adam grins and fills my water glass first. “Red’s a stunning color for you. Really makes your dark eyes pop.” I blush slightly and glance at Cole’s face. He’s finding it funny.

Ass.

“Thanks, Adam.”

“Are you feeling better? Or am I going to need to buy you your own trash can so you can carry it around with you?” he jokes.

“It was nothing,” I say before I glance at Cole, who is studying my face. He can I see I’m lying. “Bad food too soon after the flu.”

“2005
St. Frances
, one of my favorites.” Zack holds up the bottle to show us the label. Cole thanks him as he starts to pour the wine. “Adam, stop flirting. Table seven needs water.”

“Bye.” Adam grins as he walks away.

Zack laughs and shakes his head. “I feel for ya, Logan. You’re going to be fighting men off this one left and right your whole life.”

“Then I guess we are even,” I cut in, and Cole rolls his eyes.

“Dinner will be ready in twenty. I promise, no fish, Savannah.” Zack winks and heads over to check in on another table.

Cole holds up his wine glass to me. “To troubled times that only make us stronger. To unexpected love that only makes us fall harder.”

“Well said.” I clink his glass and take a sip, swirling it around and over my tongue. “It’s delicious.” I lick my bottom lip, only to get a growl out of Cole. I look over and see his hungry eyes.

“Please don’t do that, baby.”

I look down to see what he’s talking about. “What?”

“That look and the way you lick your lips nearly has me ripping your clothes off right here.”

This right here is one of the main reasons I can’t get enough of Cole. He’s so
animal
. I love the fact that he’ll take me whenever, wherever. Not only that, but he tells me what he’s thinking without hesitation. This. Is. Incredibly. Sexy.

I twist the wine glass between my fingers. “How would you have me?” I ask so casually people around us would think we were chatting about the food.

“I’d flick up that dress and find you bare and lay you flat on the table. I'd spread your legs and dive in for a taste first. Then grip your shoulders and slip in verrrry slowly.” I can feel my chest rising and falling heavily.

“You like taking me from behind,” I remind him, encouraging him to go on.

“I do.” He takes a drink of his wine while his eyes swipe the crowded restaurant. “It’s my favorite position with you.”

“Why?”

His grin has devilish written all over it. “It’s the sounds you make. They’re different, they’re more animalistic. It’s sexy grabbing your hair and waist watching myself burying full tilt into your tight little opening. Your back curves, your head dips back, and your ass shakes when you want it harder.” He closes his eyes in an effort to get control, his jaw ticks, then he looks me straight in the eye. “It’s indescribable how much I need it.” I find myself panting right there across the table from him at Zack’s. In my workplace, no less!

I clear my throat and try to sort my thoughts as Zack and Adam serve our dinner.

“Filet mignon, with sautéed mushrooms and crumbled blue cheese, a side of roasted baby potatoes and fiddleheads.” My mouth is watering by the time he’s finished explaining. “Enjoy.” He nods before backing away and directing Adam toward another table.

The meat is so tender that my fork glides straight to the plate. I moan in delight at the first bite. The flavors swarm my taste buds, begging me to pair it with the wine. I don’t even notice Cole watching me until I tip my glass back and see his gorgeous smile.

“Aren’t you going to try it?”

“I’m glad you like it.” He picks up his fork and knife, taking a piece of the steak and placing it in his mouth. Cole might be a big guy, but he eats very politely. His parents have raised him well.

We go back to eating and making small talk about the town and its history. We’re acting like a normal couple. I love it.

“How’re Abigail and Doc?” I ask after our plates have been cleared. Poor Cole tugs at the collar of his shirt, and finally he just unbuttons it. “Feel better?” I grin.

“Yes.” He laughs and leans back against the seat.

“Why didn’t you just wear what you are comfortable in?” I reach over and take his hand in mine. I trace circles over his fingers, noticing how small mine look in comparison.

“I need to make a good first impression,” he whispers, leaning over the table and kissing the back of my hand. “I need to show you I can be more than just a country boy.” I slide my hand away and his head flips up. I shake my head slowly, seeing something I haven’t before.
Huh.
“What?”

“Cole, I’m not interested in going back to New York. That part of me has died. The very thought of returning there makes me scared as hell.” He sighs and gives me a quick nod. I reach for his hand, grabbing his attention. “Honestly, Cole, my heart is with you. Ever since I met you, you’ve had it. You keep comparing yourself to something you think I am. If that’s truly how you see us, then you really don’t know me at all.”

He looks around to see if the staff is within hearing. “How do I know one day you’re not going to wake up and want to go back to the city life? That’s not me. I can’t do it. I need my mountain.”

“And how do I know that one day you’re not going to wake and fall out of love with me?” I counter.

“You can’t stop loving a piece of yourself, Savannah. You are here.” He points to his chest, making my heart want to leap over the table and join his. “Come on.” He stands and offers me a hand. He helps me with my coat and leads us out of the restaurant.

His fingers thread through mine as we walk along the sidewalk that’s now dusted lightly with fresh snow. Though it’s not Christmas, the street is still lined with white twinkle lights, making the town sparkle. He stops us at window. “You remember this place?”

“Yes.” I point to a box now showing a cross necklace. “It was right there. I wear it every day.” I pat my chest where it rests against my skin. I turn and point down and across the street. “And right there is where I first met Christina, and you told her we were engaged. I’m not going to lie, that was pretty damn fun.”

“Yes, it was.”

I pull him down so his lips meet mine and feel him tug me closer. He’s warm and tastes like wine. I moan when his tongue massages mine. Snow starts to fall harder, pricking my face and making me shiver.

He clears his throat and wraps an arm around my waist, encouraging me to walk with him. I tuck myself in close, thinking how happy I am when we are together. Things to seem to make sense, and so much of my worry floats away when I’m wrapped in Cole’s arms.

“Want to get a coffee?” he asks, nuzzling my head with his cold nose. He nods toward a tiny coffee shop across the street. I spot his SUV and reach in his pocket and pull out his keys.

“I actually think I’d like to get back to my apartment,” I say, dangling the keys. His eyes darken as he snatches them from my fingers. I laugh as he hurries me over and into the shelter of his truck.

The short drive to my place has me nearly crawling out of my skin. I feel like if his hands aren’t on me in the matter of seconds, I’m going to lose it. He pulls into the parking lot toward the back, but when he goes to open the door, I stop him.

“What?” He scans the lot, wondering what he’s missing.

The snow quickly covers the windows, hiding us from peeping eyes. I peel off my coat and crawl on to his lap. “Wow, Savannah, here?” I hold his face and swoop down to catch his bottom lip, giving it a nibble. His hands glide to my thighs, pushing my dress up. He growls when he feels I’m once again commando. “Jesus, baby,” he mutters as he swipes his fingers between my folds, discovering how completely soaked I am.

I feel almost feverish with lust. I don’t know what’s wrong with me, but I can’t help my hands that are nearly clawing at his belt. He must sense my need, because he lifts up and pushes down his pants and stands up his erection for me. I slide down, tossing my head back with a throaty moan.

He shifts his seat back to give us some more room. I grab the seat, raising myself a little off him, and start moving my hips in a slow, sexy roll. He grabs my ass, feeling the movement.

“Holy Christ, baby,” he pants, kissing my neck. “That feels so damn good.” I feel my wild side begging to come out. I try to keep it back, but it’s taking hold of me. My need for hard, animal sex is surfacing. I squeeze him hard as I flick forward. He gasps my hips and hauls me down. Then I see it. Dominating Cole is starting to show…
perfect!
I squeeze one more time and muster all my will and slow my pace. It’s not easy when my head is screaming me to go on. “Oh hell no,” he grunts, shifting me so I’m under him. He flattens the seat as he pulls out. “Up on your knees,” he commands. I do, though the space is small and he is so big. I manage and feel his hands grip my hips. He thrusts back in and props one foot up and kneels on the other. He slams me backward…over…and over…and over. I’m so lost in my build-up I couldn’t care less if anyone sees the car moving. I
need
this!

“Harder!” I scream. He reaches around and circles the perfect spot, and I go off, screaming his name into the chilly night fogging the glass all around us.

“Fuck, baby,” Cole grunts from behind me, “you make me wild. Sometimes I’m scared I’m going to hurt you.”

I swallow and try to moisten my dry mouth. “You won’t.” I shift and pull my dress back down. I scramble to the back seat so he has some room to get his pants on.

We skip the stairs and use the elevator instead. I sink into his side, feeling very relaxed and satisfied.

It isn’t until we are in bed, naked and wrapped into each other’s arms, that I ask a question. “Cole?”

“Mmm?” he says sleepily.

“Was The American telling the truth about Roth? Was he the one taking the photos?”

Cole pulls me a little closer. “Yeah, he was being paid pretty good to do it too.”

“I’m sorry.”

He yawns. “When I went to tell him he made it, my gut told me something was off. I’m glad I followed it, I’m even happier you remembered so he could be confronted.”

I turn to see him over my shoulder. “So he confessed?”

“Not at first, but when we told him The American outed him, he cooperated. He’ll go to jail for a few years, but most of all, the Army is kicking him out.”

“Good.”

He doesn’t deserve to fight.

Chapter Seven

I wake to beads of sweat across my forehead and a strong urge to vomit last night’s dinner. I roll out of bed and rush to the restroom. I barely make it before I’m cupping my mouth. I heave and retch for what seems like fifteen minutes. By the time I’m done, I am miserable. Somehow I make it back to my empty bed and sleep for another few hours. The nausea doesn’t subside even during my restless sleep. By the time I give in and dry heave, I decide I need to make a doctor’s appointment today. I call, and am relieved they’re able to see me right away.

The waiting room is quiet, only me and another woman who looks like she’s as sick as I am. Shit! I hope I don’t have some crazy flu. She glances over and smiles a little, then ruffles inside her purse and pulls something out. She leans over and hands it to me. It’s a roll of Arrowroot cookies.

“Try one, I promise it’ll help.” She nods.

I slip one out and nibble on the end. “Thanks.” I try and force the cookie, but it takes a lot of willpower. My stomach is dead set against me feeling a better.

“Your first?” she asks, tossing down her magazine.

I roll my head to look at her. I’m so friggin’ tired I really don’t want to chat right now. “First what?”

She points to my stomach. “Baby.”

My eyes widen, snapping me awake. “Oh, I’m not—” I stop when it hits me. “Oh. My. God,” I whisper, doing some quick math in my head. I can't believe I am so stupid.

“Congratulations.” She stands after her name is called. “Maybe I’ll be seeing you around.”

“Maybe,” I answer, completely shocked by this possibility. I try so hard to stop myself from getting excited, but a smile tugs at my lips.

I pee in a cup and wait with a thumping knee for the doctor to return. So many things are running through my head, one being…what now? A few weeks ago I would have been confused, but today, right now, I know what my heart wants. I want a home with Cole up on the mountain, full of our family. Suddenly, a haunting feeling creeps in when I think I still have two very stressful situations I need to get through—Lynn’s court case, and what’s going to happen with my father.

The door opening snaps me out of the thoughts screaming in my head.

“All righty, Savannah,” Dr. Brown says, adjusting her blouse as she sits across from me. “How have you been since the miscarriage?”

I swallow hard and try to be brave. “I’m doing better, thanks.”

“I’m happy to hear that.” She opens my file while I cling onto the seat for fear of falling. “Given the details of your missed menstrual cycle and your urine results, I would say…” She turns a little wheel, concentrating as she goes. “Congratulations, Savannah, you are roughly seven and a half weeks pregnant.”

A smile bursts across my face, instantly lifting my mood. “Wow, wow, all right.”

“I take it this is something that was planned?”

I nod, thinking we never talked about ‘trying,’ but we’ve been trying. No condoms and lots of sex means we were trying. “Yes, we have been. I just didn’t recognize the symptoms until today. My work had a flu going around, so I just thought…” I stop and place my hand on my belly, confirming it to myself with touch.

“Where are you working?”

“Zack’s, at the bar.”

“Hum…” She nods and writes in my file. “Are you still living at the house?”

“Umm, no, I’m living in town,” I answer, not sure where she’s going with this. Or is this protocol?

She takes off her glasses and leans back in her chair. “Well, since you have had a miscarriage due to high stress, I need to know if there anything I should be aware of that might endanger this pregnancy.” She watches as the bliss drains from my face. “Savannah, I need you to be honest with me, if only for the safety of your baby. You got pregnant very quickly after your last one, and there are risks.” She removes her glasses and leans her elbows on her desk. “Remember, everything here is strictly confidential.”

“There is.” I spend the next forty minutes filling her in on my life up until now, and what obstacles I’ll be facing.

“Well, considering all that, I really would like to see you twice a month, and if you feel any discomfort of any sort, you come right in or call me.” She hands me her card with her personal contact information. “I really need you to avoid as much stress as possible, though I know that will be hard with what’s coming. Maybe you should think about not working?”

“Do I have to?”

“No, I’m just saying if it becomes overwhelming, take some time off. It’s just not worth it.” She hands me a ton of paperwork and research to go over. “So for now, here are some prenatal pills with some folic acid, you remember the drill. Do you have any questions?”

“Any advice how to fight the nausea?”

“Are you actually bringing up food?”

“Yes, a lot,” I admit, remembering this morning.

She scribbles on a pad of paper. “Try eating a piece of chicken or turkey when you wake up. The protein will help take it away. But if it doesn’t, take one of these three times a day, and it will do the trick. It will not harm the baby.”

I go to leave, but she stops me. “Savannah, I want you to come back in soon so I can get a look at that little peanut. I want to check the heartbeat, make sure this pregnancy is strong from the very beginning.”

“I will, but not without Cole.”

She nods her understanding.

The walk down the long office hallway leaves me holding onto the wall for support. I’ve wanted a baby for so long, and here I am pregnant again. I fumble with my purse to pull out my cell phone. I stare at it once I’m outside. I’m not sure what to do first. I start to call Cole, but stop myself as a dark cloud moves in on my celebration. What if something happens again? Do I want to put him through this? Do I wait and tell him after the three month mark? Or do tell him now? My mind is spinning. I block everything else out and let my mind wander as I walk to work.

I’m still lost in my own little world when Jake decides to tell me about his date with Graham. His mouth is moving, but I’m not listening. In fact, I somehow lip read most of my orders. When I don’t respond, I get a tap to the arm. Jake is staring at me like I was supposed to have a reaction to his story.

“That’s great, Jake.” I smile and toss out an empty bottle, replacing it with a new one.

He leans his hip into the bar and crosses his arms. “Is it, now? I wouldn’t think Graham almost getting into a car accident is great.”

“Wait, what?” I shake my head, trying to recall his words.

“No, I’m lying, but see, you’re not listening!” He grabs my shoulders and gives me a little jolt. “What is going on? You’re like Night of the Living Dead.”

“Sorry.” I say with a weak laugh. “I just have a lot going on.” I wave my hand at my head.

He makes a face. “Anything I can do to help?”

I serve my client and take the credit card, swiping it down the machine. “I wish, but no. I just have to make a decision that I’m not sure how to make.”

Jake gives me a hug, rubbing my back. “If you need me, you know where I am.”

“Thanks, you really have no idea how much I needed to hear that.”

***

Three days go by, and I’m still stuck in my routine, not sure what to do. Cole has been busy, so we’ve only been texting. He hasn’t noticed my mood change since I saw him last. I go through ups and downs of being extremely happy, to scared to death, to just plan denial that my body would allow me to get pregnant again so fast.

I work my shift in another blur. Poor Jake must think I’m on something. My customers don’t seem to mind so much that I’m not as chatty, which is good because I barely remember my left from my right.

I zip my jacket up and step into the chilly air, and before I know what I’m doing, I’m calling a cab. A short while later, I dial again.

“Keith?” I say once he answers. I can tell he’s playing poker because his voice is muffled from his cigar.

“What’s up with you? Everything all right?” I hear Dell hooting in the background about his poker hand.

“Can you do me a favor?”

“Of course.”

“Tell the
Rambo wanna-be
at the gate to let me pass.”

“Wait, you’re here? Hang on.” A moment later the guy’s radio cracks and he waves me into his little heated booth. “What the hell, Savannah? I’ll come get you. Stay right there!”

“Yes, sir,” I joke, but he doesn’t find it funny and hangs up on me.

Headlights blind the booth as he appears moments later. He hops out to open the passenger door, and I rush in, seeking the warmth. He turns the car around and glares at me. We pass through the other two gates before he even speaks to me.

“Do I even wanna know how you got here?”

I close my eyes, whispering the answer.

“A cab? A flipping cab!” he yells at me for breaching the house rules, but I stop him.

“I got him to drop me off a mile and a half away. He wasn’t happy about it, but whatever. I hiked in the rest of the way.”

He stops the car in front of the house. His hands grip the steering wheel, and the leather stretches under the force. “You hiked in the middle of the night, in the back mountains, where god knows what is out there just to come and visit? Why the hell didn’t you call me or Mark?”

I grab my bag and walk toward the door with him close behind me. I know it was the world’s stupidest move. I’m reckless for no reason, and I don’t know why. Maybe it’s because I’ve been before. “Yes, it sounds stupid, but honestly, the walk felt nice. I needed to clear my head.”

“Stupid is not the word I’d use, Savannah,” he grits out.

I turn, feeling tired. “Where’s Cole?”

He studies my face while moving past me to open the door. “Should I even ask what’s going on?”

“No,” I sigh, “not yet.” I admit feeling like I owe him that.

“Office was the last place I saw him.”

“Thanks, Keith.” I drop my bag, remove my coat and boots, and replace them with my flats and hurry that way.

I knock and wait. “Yeah.” His voice sounds tired. I open the door and find my Cole hunched over his laptop typing away in a black t-shirt and jeans. Just the way I love him. “What in God’s name does anyone want from me at one a.m.?” he mutters without looking up.

“I didn’t want to sleep alone tonight,” I say softly, and his head snaps up. His face goes from stressed to relieved.

“Hey” his smile draws me toward him. I crawl on his lap and get him to wrap his arms around me. “How did you get here?”

“You seem stressed, Cole, what’s wrong?”

“Work. Sometimes I think I need to pass some of it off, but I don’t. I’m my own worst enemy.” I rub my fingers over the stubble along his jaw, stealing his body heat. “You smell good.” He takes a deep breath, then lets out a long sigh. “You have no idea how much I needed this.” I lean up to kiss his neck, letting him know I do. “Answer me, Savannah.” I know he won’t let it go.

“Cab, then hiked it in the rest of the way.” His body turns to stone. “I feel by now I should at least be on the guest list. Rambo out there, who has seen me at least a dozen times, wouldn’t let me pass. Pointed his big old gun at me until I finally called Keith to get me through. Honestly, Cole, I need some kind of special pass.”

“You took a cab and hiked it here?” I don’t have to look at him to know how pissed he is. The vibrating hand on my back is enough to alert me. “Just tell me why.”

I shift off his lap and stand in front of his desk, sorting out what I should say. I go to open my mouth to tell him everything, but I can’t. My nerves get the best of me. He’s watching every movement I make, calculating it, trying to read me. I drop my head and hold back my pesky tears.

***

Cole

Cole can see something’s bothering her, but he decides not to push. He’s not sure if Frank has called her yet, and if not, he won’t be the one to bring it up. The idea of her walking along the dark mountain road makes him want to punch a hole in the cabby’s face. Who the hell leaves a woman on the side of the road in the middle of nowhere? He’s not sure why Savannah does what she does. Sometimes he thinks she may not have any regard for her own safety, which scares the hell out of him.

“I just wanted to see you,” she nearly sobs, twisting his heart. “I didn’t want to bother someone to come and get me. It was my choice to move there. You’ve been so busy, and I’ve been feeling a little…” She rubs her stomach. If she’s still sick, he’s going to call Dr. Rice. If there’s something going on, he needs to know now. York’s face creeps into his mind and makes him uneasy. “I didn’t really know what I was doing until I was at the gate. I know it was stupid, but…” Tears start to flow, but she doesn’t try to hide them. She looks so tired and small as she breaks down.

“Hey,” he stands in front of her, “it’s okay, baby. You’re here and safe, that’s all that matters.” He kisses her head as she sags into him. “Why don’t you go have a hot bath, and I’ll join you in a few? I just need to send off a few emails and I’ll be done.” She nods as she steps away, looking paler than normal. “Can I get you anything?”