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Authors: Jean C. Joachim

BOOK: Memories of Love
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“I like it, too. Easier for Sarah,
let her transition slowly, adjust.” He rubbed his neck.

“Brother dear, you amaze me. Well
done. Now that you’re home, half-way sober, and not going to put your fist
through the wall, I’m off to bed.” Jane pushed to her feet.

Grant gave his sister a bear hug.
“You’re the best. I couldn’t do this without you.”

“Gary was happy to know I’ll be
staying.” She shot him a sly smile.

He raised his eyebrows. “I might
have to call when I’m on my way home so I don’t…interrupt anything?”

She colored. “Perhaps.”

“Oh?” He raised his eyebrows. “Gone
that far already, has it?”

Her blush deepened. “Wouldn’t you
like to know?” She brushed by him and headed for her room.

“Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do,”
he snickered.

“You
horndog
!
And don’t you go interrogating Gary at the office, either,” Jane wagged her
finger at him.

He laughed and raised his hand. In
his bedroom, he got undressed but didn’t feel at all sleepy. He lay in bed,
staring out the window.
Still things to
work out. If she goes back to the movies, she’ll be all over the world. I need
her here. I make enough money, she doesn’t need to work. I’ve got to convince
her to marry me and move in. I can’t let her get away again.

He rolled onto his side, staring at
the empty space next to him. Anger at Evelyn’s treachery began to fade,
replaced by hope for happiness with Cara. Healing warmth touched his soul. He
fanned his fingers out over her pillow. The thought of her there made his heart
skip a beat.
Soon she’ll be in my bed
again.
A smile lifted the corners of his mouth at the prospect. He rested
his hand where Cara would lay her head as sleep claimed him.

 

* * * *

 

Cara paced in front of the windows
in her suite. She brushed aside thoughts of slumber, welcoming instead thoughts
of Grant.
He looks wonderful.
The
desire to brush her fingers through his dark hair had never left her. His
smoldering, sexy stares roaming over her body made her shiver with need. She
had wondered if she’d feel the same about him when they met again. Now there
was no doubt. She wanted him as much now as she had years ago, maybe more.

His touch had excited her in a way
no other man had. Cara had searched for a replacement. For a while after Sarah
was born, she went from man to man, looking for another Grant. A guy who wasn’t
married and would love her as unconditionally…to no avail. Instead, she passed
her time with handsome young men, aspiring actors hoping she could boost their
careers.

None of the young lovers could
elicit a response from her like Grant could.
He can still raise my temperature with one touch.
Emotion warred
with reason in her head. But she knew they had to take it slow, especially with
Sarah.
How confusing to have one mother
today and a different one tomorrow.

Cara shed her clothes and slid naked
between the sheets. Envisioning Grant lying next to her brought lustful
feelings.
It won’t be long.
Remembering
the feel of his chest beneath her hand, it seemed he had kept in good shape.
She licked her lips at the prospect of touching him, pressing up against him, and
making love with him. Her visions faded to a hazy dream as sleep claimed her.

The next morning she slept in,
waking at ten o’clock and stretching lazily. Closing the sash on her silk wrap,
she joined Skip in the living room. He was sitting at a table by the window,
sipping coffee and reading the newspaper. Also wearing a robe, he raised his
hand to Cara as she crossed the room and sat opposite him.

“Coffee’s still hot. Don’t know
about your omelet.”

“Have fun at the clubs last night?” She
asked as he poured her a mug.

“Yes, thank you.”

“Any delicious men?” She uncovered
the platter with her omelet and turkey bacon on it.

“Too many to count.” He took a
forkful of his eggs.

“I worry you won’t make it home.”

“I can take care of myself. I’m
cautious.”

She arched an eyebrow. “I doubt
that.”

“I am. I don’t take chances.” A
handsome man in his mid-twenties, wearing a T-shirt and jeans, staggered out of
Skip’s room. He lowered his gaze, looking embarrassed.

“I’m Cara Brewster,” she said,
extending her hand.

“I know. Who wouldn’t? I’m Tim.” He
shook her hand, took the coffee just poured from Skip, added a ton of milk, and
chugged the warm liquid. “Got an audition,” he mumbled before kissing Skip then
turning to leave.

“Good luck!” Skip called out.

After the door shut, she turned to
her friend. “Isn’t he a little young for you?”

“I’m only forty-two, my dear. Not
exactly one foot in the grave. How was your date? Sleep with him? Is he in the
bedroom, still recovering from a night of passion with his dream girl?” Skip
snickered.

She laughed. “Not quite. I’m taking
things a bit slower than you.”

“Snail’s pace if you ask me,” he
mumbled, refolding his paper.

“We’ll get there.” She picked up a
piece of bacon and took a bite.

“The suspense is killing me. I’d
think you’d be so horny for him that—”

“Don’t assume I’m not. It’s been
five years. We do need to get reacquainted before we get naked together.”

He lifted his eyebrows. “Really? Why?
Not everyone feels that way.”

“Man-whore,” she teased.

“And proud of it!”

Cara laughed.

“So what did happen last night?” He
refilled his coffee.

“We had a fabulous dinner. Grant is
so smooth…all the rough edges have worn down.”

“He’s pretty sexy.”

“You noticed?” She snickered, before
swirling the rich, brown liquid around her tongue.

“Of course, darling. I never miss an
attractive man. What did you talk about?”

“Many things…Sarah, us. Something
about being with a man who knows me as Carol Anne, not Cara, that makes me
so…so…comfortable.” She sat back in her chair.

“Ah, the man who knew you when.” He
nodded, struggling to get a wiggly piece of egg on his fork.

“I guess. He knows the real me. The
scared little girl hiding inside the confident star. No pretense. No
expectations. I can be myself with G.”

“That’s what you call him?”

Heat rose to her cheeks. “My
nickname for him.”

“And his for you was…? Or is it too
dirty to reveal?” He wiggled his eyebrows.

“Very funny! It’s Cara Mia. That’s
where I got my stage name from.”

“This guy really
is
part of you, isn’t he?”

“More than I realized when I left. I
had stars in my eyes, my heart in my mouth, and everything riding on that
movie. I thought he’d wait. I didn’t see until it was too late how angry he was
at me for leaving. He was so certain we’d never see each other again. He was
almost right.” She trained her gaze out the window at the view.

Skip took her hand in his.
“Poignant. Very emotional meeting him again.”

She nodded. “I appreciate him so
much more now. We must stay together.”

“There’s Sarah to consider, too.”

“Of course. Glad you’re accepting
her as part of my life.”

“Does this mean you’re giving up
your film career when this show is over?”

“I don’t know what it means. I’m
trying not to think that far ahead. But if leaving to do a movie means losing
him, I doubt I could do that again.” She moved the last little bit of egg
around her plate with her fork.

“Maybe he won’t be so…so…inflexible
this time.”

“Two smart people. You’d think we’d
be able to work it out. I was naïve to think Grant would hang around, waiting
for me, twiddling his thumbs…”

“Giving up sex. It does sound a
little Mary Poppins, if you get my drift. Not like you at all.”

“It was. I was…different then.” She
pushed her chair back from the table.

“Younger. We all learn as we age,
hopefully,” he laughed.

“I’m trying.
Grant’ll
try, too. I know he will.” She stood up.

“You both damn well better, you’ve
got a child to consider. She needs her mother and her father.”

“Aye, aye, Captain!” She shot him a
mock salute.

“Glad you’re listening,” he sniffed,
plucking a croissant from the bread basket.

“Would be a dream come true. I’ve
always wanted to live with him and Sarah as a family.”

“Then go for it. Take it, if you
want it. Don’t let anything stand in your way. You haven’t when it’s come to
your career. Use the same moxie to win him over and find a way to be together,
babe.” Skip patted her hand.

She
teared
up. “Thanks, Skip. I’ll try.” Cara finished her coffee. “Go for a run with me?”

“After last night…not sure I have
the energy.”

“I told you, those younger men,” she
wagged her finger at him.

He blushed. “They do have stamina,
don’t they?”

Cara tugged on his arm. “Come on.
You need it, and so do I. If you want to keep up with Tim, you’ve got to be in
shape.”

“I’m coming. God, I hate it when
you’re right all the time.”

 
 
 
 

Chapter Nine

 
 

“We’ve waited here for that stupid
bus every day this week. I’m giving you five minutes,” Josie said, glancing at
her watch.

“Please, Josie? It has to come today.”
Sarah turned pleading eyes on her friend’s sister.

“Five minutes!” Josie’s lips clamped
together to form a firm line.

Sarah stood facing the bus stop,
closed her eyes, and prayed.
Please God,
let it come now.
A tug on her sleeve brought her gaze to Molly, who was
jumping up and down. She pointed to a bus.

“Josie! There it is!” Sarah
hollered.

Josie turned and looked. Sure enough,
the poster with Cara Brewster’s picture was as big as life. The bus stopped and
opened its doors. Josie read, “Cara Brewster starring in Blind Love. Opening
October Thirtieth at the Irving Berlin Theater.”

“Irving Berlin Theater. Irving
Berlin Theater. Irving Berlin Theater,” Sarah repeated over and over again,
staring at the beautiful woman. Finally, all the passengers boarded the bus. It
closed its doors again and pulled away, lumbering down the avenue, swaying
slightly with its heavy load.

“Come on! Let’s get to your house
and make a plan,” Sarah said, pulling on Molly’s jacket.

The girls ran down the street with
Josie hollering for them to slow down. Sarah stopped at the door to their
building. A tickle at the back of her neck caused her to turn around. She spied
the chubby man she had seen several times before lurking on the corner for a
moment. Their eyes connected briefly before he turned. Sarah watched him walk
away before she entered.

Once the girls reached Molly’s
apartment, they tore into the snacks Molly’s mother had left out before she
went to work. Microwave popcorn for them to make, a scrumptious hot chocolate
mix to stir into milk, and a small plate piled high with homemade, chocolate
chip cookies Molly had helped make the day before.

“Don’t bother me unless the apartment
is on fire,” Josie said with a snarl, disappearing into her room and closing
the door.

Molly and Sarah took the tray of chewy
cookies into Molly’s room. Light peach paint and cheerful peach, yellow, and
white print bedspreads on the two twin beds lent a cheerful air. Molly had
decorated with pictures of wild animals, mostly large cats. Cheetahs, leopards,
lions, and tigers raced across her walls.

“How do we get the address of the
Irving Berlin Theater?” Sarah asked her friend.

“I don’t know. The computer?”

“But you don’t have one.”

“Josie does. A laptop. Let’s go.”

Sarah stopped her friend. “She said
not to disturb her unless the house is on fire.”

“She always says that. This is
important.”

The girls went down the hall, where
loud music was blasting from behind Josie’s door. Molly knocked. No answer.
Sarah knocked harder. Still no answer. The girls counted to three and knocked
together. Slowly, the door opened a crack.

“I told you to leave me alone. Is
there a fire? Are you dying?” They shook their heads. “Then go away.”

“Please, Josie. We need help.” Sarah
begged.

“What?” She hollered to be heard.

“Sarah needs an address. You can
find it on the computer.”

“What address?”

“That theater place,” Sarah
explained. The door closed again and the music got softer. Then, Josie opened
the door about a foot but didn’t let the girls in.

“What do you want that for?” She
eyed them with suspicion.

Molly feigned indifference. “Nothing.
Just want to know where it is.”

“Why?”

“Just ’cause.”

Josie narrowed her eyes. “What are
you up to?”

“I’ll tell you,” Sarah blurted out.
“I want to find my mother. She’s there. I have to go see her.”

“You don’t even know if she
is
your mother.”

“She is. She is. She looks like me.”

“What if she isn’t?”

“Then at least Sarah will know,”
Molly said.

The three stood around eyeing each
other silently.

“And I suppose you won’t stop
bothering me until you get it, right?”

Both girls nodded. Josie muttered a
few curse words under her breath before opening the door wider. Sarah moved in
slowly, looking around. The room was painted a deep purple with white trim.
There was a desk piled too high with magazines and books to be of any use. The
walls were covered with posters from dark and mysterious images to rock stars.

The computer sat on a lap desk on
the unmade bed. Molly climbed up and sat at the bottom. Sarah joined her.

“Irving Berlin Theater, huh?” Josie
talked as she typed. “Aha! Here it is.” She wrote on a piece of paper but
didn’t hand it to the girls.

“Come on, Josie, stop teasing.”

“I’m not teasing. Not giving this to
you. I’d get killed if you go there and something happens to you.” Sarah’s eyes
welled up with tears. “Okay, okay. Don’t cry, Sarah. I’ll take you guys there
myself.”

“You will?” Sarah leaped straight up
into the air. Molly screamed.

“Shut up, already! Yeah. It’s too
dangerous for you to go alone.”

“When? When?” Sarah’s adrenaline was
pumping.

“Whenever I choose. I’ll let you
know.” The girls’ faces fell. “Don’t worry. Soon, soon.”

“Promise?” Molly asked.

“Promise.”

“How soon?” Molly folded her arms
across her chest.

“Two weeks?” Josie raised her
eyebrows. The girls frowned. “That’s my final offer. Or I rip this up.”

“Don’t do that!” Sarah yelled.
“Okay. Two weeks.”

 

* * * *

 

Grant sat back in his big chair in
the corner office. A smile played over his lips. He picked up the phone. “Jeff?
How are you? What’s happening with my divorce?”

“Papers for legal separation are
ready. I’ve sent them to you and to her lawyer.”

“Good. So can I go ahead and live my
life?”

Jeff snickered on the other end.
“Can you go out and get laid without committing adultery? Yeah.”

Grant laughed. “You know me too
well.”

“From what you said, she’s shacked
up with some guy and has been sleeping with him anyway. So she got to the
adultery deal first.”

“How about money?”

“That doesn’t sound so good. I think
she’s going to hit you up for alimony.”

“Damn her! Tricked me into marriage
in the first place,” Grant muttered.

“You should have demanded to see a
pregnancy test.”

“I suppose. But she was so upset.”

“Yeah. Mr. Nice Guy. And you paid
for it. Watch out next time.”

“This is different. This is my
daughter’s mother.”

“Oh, boy. Sounds interesting, but
I’ve got people here for a meeting. Good luck.”

“Thanks, Jeff.”

Green
light with Carol Anne. Nothing can stop us now.
He dialed
Café Limoges
. “Jean Claude, can you
deliver a picnic for two?”

That evening, Grant missed
Blind Love
in order to work until eight
then rush home to shower and change. Sarah was staying over at Molly’s house, and
the picnic was on its way. He intended to surprise Cara after the show. Slapping
on some aftershave, he pulled on a fresh, white, button down shirt and picked
up his camel hair sports jacket.
No tie.
Less to take off.
He grinned.

Jane appeared in the bedroom doorway.
“Gary’s coming over tonight.”

“Oh?” He cocked an eyebrow. “Should
I knock before entering the apartment?”

“Maybe before coming into my room.
But I don’t expect you home before dawn anyway,” she snickered. “Haven’t you
waited long enough?”

Heat in his cheeks caused Grant to turn
away from his sister. “Not a topic I want to discuss with you.”

“Same here,” she laughed before
moving back into the living room.

Grant reached in his top drawer and
plucked out three condom packs.
It’s been
a long time.
He stuffed them into his pants pocket and grinned. Jane patted
him on the shoulder on his way out. He passed Gary in the lobby and smiled.
“Break her heart and you answer to me,” Grant tossed out, making him turn pale.

The mid-October evening was mild and
clear. Grant strolled down to the theater. He loved to walk in Manhattan.
Everything seemed so close. It gave him time to think and he enjoyed looking at
the people and shop windows as he marched by. He didn’t think he’d like New
York, maybe because he was forced to move here by the behavior of some weirdo.
But he found himself loving it.
Do I love
it here because Carol Anne is here? Maybe I just love New York.
He hummed a
favorite song,
Lovestoned
by Justin Timberlake, as he walked down
Broadway.

Turning his mind back to pleasant
thoughts, like Cara waiting for him in bed, he hoped he’d find her as
enthusiastic a lover as ever. He admitted to himself he had turned off to sex
after a couple of years with Evelyn. Willing at first, she seemed to tire of
him one minute then cry he was neglecting her the next. Sex between them became
charged with emotional issues. No matter what he did, it was wrong. He tried to
make her feel loved, but she never bought it. Perhaps because it wasn’t true.

Shame warmed his face against the
cool night breeze.
I should have left her
after she said she miscarried. A decent interval then a quiet departure.
He’d
been over a thousand scenarios and what he should have done. At the time, Carol
Anne was galloping all over the globe not giving him or their daughter a second
thought. Or so he imagined. So what was the point in hurting Evelyn? By then
he’d come to realize he’d never be able to love another woman.
So much time wasted.

He sighed and slowed down as he
rounded Columbus Circle.
A second chance.
Never thought I’d have a second chance. Don’t blow it.
He stopped at a deli
to pick up a dozen of her second favorite, pink roses. Nervousness crawled up
his spine.
Don’t push her for sex. But
don’t not make a pass at her. She’ll think you don’t want her.
Suddenly his
palms started to sweat.
Chill!

He went back to humming and
remembering the texture of her skin and hair. As he approached the stage door,
his smile broadened.
She’s right behind
that door, waiting for me.

“Go right in, Mr. Hollings. Ms.
Brewster’s expecting you,” Gus said.

 

* * * *

 

Time had run away from Cara.
Chatting with Quinn, Susanna, and Jake after the show had eaten up the minutes
she’d reserved for getting dressed in something hot for her date with Grant.
Once inside her dressing room, she moved like a tornado, ripping her dress off
the hanger and throwing it on the chair.

She yanked her top off and pulled
down the skirt she wore in the last scene. Taking a deep breath to steady
herself, she tried to hang them up carefully, but her hand was shaking.
Excitement surrounding the previews and seeing Grant had her keyed up. Love,
lust, and need blended in her blood, reducing her ability to concentrate to
practically nil.

She tore off the white bra, tossing
it in a drawer while she fished for the black lace one to match the black lace panties
she’d bought just for tonight. She removed her underwear and shoved them in her
leather bag. Finally, she located the black set, pulling them out.

As she held up the sexy lingerie,
the door burst open and in marched Grant. Startled, Cara screamed. Grant
dropped the flowers and stood for a second, staring at her nude body. He
recovered quickly and left, closing the door behind him.

“Grant! Give me five.”

“I’m so sorry. Gus said to go in.”

“I’m running a little late. I’ll
only be a minute.” She slipped on the sexy clothing then threw the dress over
her head. “You can come in now,” she called.

Grant peeked in cautiously. “All
clear?”

“Come in, come in.”

“Darn! I was hoping to see you in
the next stage of dress. But you’re too fast for me.”

She laughed.

“I must admit that surprise jolted
my heart as much as it must have yours. Even in ten seconds, I can tell you’re
just as beautiful now as you were years ago, Cara Mia.”

She picked up the roses and put them
on her dressing table before allowing him to pull her into his embrace. She
took a deep breath, enjoying the scent of Grant mixed with his piney aftershave
and the smell of his freshly ironed shirt.
God
he smells good. Much better aftershave than I remember.

He ran his hands up and down her
back as she pressed right up against him, leaving no room for even a piece of
paper to slide through. His tongue swiped against her lips, and she opened. He
angled his head to deepen the kiss as his fingers closed around her bottom. His
hard chest pressing into her excited her. The way he held her so tightly,
skimmed his palms over her body, squeezed her gently, told her of his desire.

The ache that had been building
inside her grew, pushing out rational thought. She wanted him to take her right
there, but the clock was ticking. Gus’s knock reminded her they were out of
time.

“Closing up, Ms. Brewster.”

She broke away from Grant. “Out in
five, Gus.” She called, trying to catch her breath.

Cara refreshed her lipstick. Grant’s
eyes glowed, and she smiled at him.
He
still rings my chimes. Chemistry is still there.
Cara ran her gaze over his
physique, from head to toe.
He’s dressing
better than he used to. Clothes fit him better. He’s filled out a little…in all
the right places.

“It’s almost like we’ve never been
apart. Kissing you is…amazing, like always,” he said, wiping her lipstick off his
mouth with his handkerchief.

Cara arranged the flowers quickly and
added water to the vase. She turned to face him and stepped closer.

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