Memories (12 page)

 "I decided I had to make a clean sweep of everything, so I packed up what little we had and left." He reached across the table and took Dani's hand in his. "Believe me, I did think about you and how my leaving might affect you. But you were so young; I honestly believed it was better for us to make a clean break. I thought then you'd have a better chance of forgetting me, even if it meant hating me for leaving. You'd go off to school and eventually find someone else and do all the things you should be doing. Things I couldn't offer you at the time. If I had only known..." his voice trailed off.

 "Would it have made a difference?"

 "I don't know," he answered honestly. "I was a different person then, not very reliable, still hooked on pot and suffering the aftershock of Vietnam. I really don't know how I would have reacted. And I'm not very proud of admitting that either." Michael shook his head and released his grip on her hand, grasping his coffee mug instead. Those years had been a mess of pot and booze and women with Dani being the only bright light in it all.

 "But I did straighten myself out when I got back to New York and into the business," he continued. "I really had no choice but to do so, and my mother made sure of it. Then, when I saw the business as a legacy I could leave to Vanessa, that's when I began to put all my energy into it. It finally made sense to me why my father and grandfather had worked so hard. It wasn't for the money, or the business itself. It was to be able to leave the next generation something better than they had known. For the first time in my life I had a goal and a purpose that was worthwhile, and it felt good."

 The waitress brought their sandwiches and left again. It was late afternoon and the restaurant was quiet. Dani stared out the large, plate-glass window beside her that viewed the busy street and tree-lined sidewalk. Everywhere there were traces of the storm, and people busy working to clean the mess up. After taking a few bites of her food, she once again turned to Miguel.

 "Where is your mother now?"

 "She died a couple of years after my dad. I was born late in their lives, so they were up in years." Michael stopped a moment, his eyes far away, and then turned back to Dani. "You know, I really did the right thing going back. My mother was happy to see me take over and proud of the work I was doing. She also had a chance to know Vanessa. When she died, I knew she was content with the way things turned out. I can live with myself knowing that."

 Dani nodded. "Yes, you did the right thing. I only wish I'd known, at the time. It would have saved me a lot of years of regret."

 "I'm sorry, Dani. I know that doesn't change things, but please believe me, I'm sorry." Michael's face looked pained again, like it had earlier when he'd professed how sorry he was. "I wish I could do something, anything to make it all better. I would give anything to do that for you."

 "You have already," Dani said softly. "By telling me what happened, by being sorry for the past, that's all I could ask for. It really has helped."

 Michael stared across the table at Dani for a few seconds, his pained expression turning soft, relieved, then the two finished their meal in comfortable silence. The stretch of years since their last relationship seemed to fade and the warmth of that time slowly emerged. As they ate, both were remembering the smiles, the happiness and the love they had felt for each other.

 They left the restaurant with Dani driving and she took Miguel on a tour of the city. He'd been to Minneapolis on business several times, but never had he seen its sights. They ended up wandering through the Mall of America, walking from shop to shop, level to level, and stopping for awhile above the indoor amusement park to watch the people on the rides. Seeing parents with their children waiting in line for rides reminded them of the times they'd taken Vanessa to the small amusement park near his apartment and they reminisced about the fun they had shared there.

 Sometime during their wanderings, they began holding hands like the younger couples they passed in the corridor. By the time Dani realized it, she felt so warm and comfortable with his touch that she didn't say a word, only continued holding his hand and smiling up at him occasionally. His gray eyes were bright with youthful excitement and she loved the way they sparkled each time he looked at her.

 On the third level, they passed a small jewelry store and stopped to look in the display window. Michael noticed a small costume jewelry pin that depicted a blond woman wearing a long, red coat, its buttons made of tiny rubies. He chuckled a little and pointed it out to Dani. "That looks like it was made for you," he said slyly.

 Dani glanced at the pin and glared at him teasingly. "Don't get me started on that again," she said, referring to the incident from the day before when he'd made her try on the red coat.

 But Michael just laughed. "I still think you need that coat," he told her.

 Dani shook her head at him and continued to walk on with Michael trailing after her. They decided to go up to the fourth floor and check out Planet Hollywood to see if they might be able to get in and take a look. Luckily, because it was still afternoon, they beat the evening crowd and were able to get a table against the wall and they had drinks and a quick snack. Again, they sat in comfortable silence as they people-watched and admired the movie memorabilia surrounding them on the walls. Finally, they made their way back to the enormous parking lot and headed north to Dani's St. Louis Park apartment.

 It was early evening and Highway 169 North running through the affluent suburb of Edina was aglow with light. Dani popped in an old Eagles tape and they drove for awhile listening to the lyrics they both knew so well.

 "Remember the first time we heard this song?" Michael interrupted as "Lying Eyes" began playing through the speakers. "It was the very first time we went out together, alone, without Vanessa."

 "I remember," Dani said as a smile of reminiscence touched her lips. "We went driving along Highway 1 and stopped at the wharf for a hot dog and fries. Then we took a walk on the beach."

 Michael looked over at Dani, happy to see the memory didn't bring sorrow to her face. "It was a cool day. The wind was blowing and you borrowed my sweatshirt to keep yourself warm." He laughed good-heartedly. "After you went home, I put that sweatshirt back on to feel and smell you near."

 Dani sighed. "You know, it took me a few years after you left to be able to listen to this song without crying. Crazy, huh?"

 Michael reached across the automatic stick that separated their seats and placed his hand on her leg. "No, not crazy," he told her. And it was this way they rode the rest of the way back to her apartment.

 As they walked into her apartment door, Michael hesitated a bit.

 "What's the matter?" Dani asked, noticing the falter in his step.

 "Well, I was just thinking that maybe you might want me to get a hotel tonight."

 "You might as well stay here again," she said, seeing the pleasure spring up in his eyes. "On the couch, of course," she added.

 Michael closed the door and walked into the room behind Dani, his eyebrows raised. "Oh," was all he said. He tilted his head a bit and scratched the side of his beard. Dani laughed at his reaction.

 "You didn't think things had changed that much, did you?" she teased.

 "Oh, no, the couch is fine," Michael said.

 "Help yourself to a soda or water," Dani told him as she walked toward her bedroom. "I'm going to get out of these jeans and into some comfy sweats."

 Michael walked over to the refrigerator, opened it and took out a cola, then wandered back to the couch. It had been an interesting day and he was just wondering what might happen next.

 "Why don't you pick out a movie from my tapes under the television?" Dani suggested from behind the bedroom door. "I can make some popcorn in a minute."

 "Okay." Michael opened up the cabinet and began rummaging through the tapes. He was amused by the diverse selection she had.

 "What's that smirk for?" Dani asked, heading toward the kitchen in gray sweat pants and a Minnesota Vikings sweatshirt.

 "I was just admiring your collection of video tapes." He pulled out an old movie. "What is it with you women and Bogart?"

 Dani gave him a wry smile as she placed a bag of popcorn in the microwave and beeped the timer. "What's wrong with Bogart? And what do you mean 'you women'?"

 "Just that you and Cathy have the same tapes. What's so hot about Bogart?"

 Dani shook her head at him as if he were a child who would never understand. "It's not just Bogart," she told him, walking over and placing her elbows on the back of the couch that stood between them. "It's the whole Bogie and Bacall thing. The way they look at each other. The sly smiles between them that make you think they are sharing a secret. There's just a special energy between them like no other couple ever had."

 Dani sighed, her eyes dreamy. "As for Bogart, he's sexy in his own way. He has the look of someone who is mean or angry, but when he smiles, his face opens up and his eyes brighten like a little boy. And when he smiles at Bacall," Dani sighed again and just left it at that.

 Michael pulled out another tape and flashed it at Dani. "What about Stallone?" he asked teasingly.

 Dani laughed. "
Rambo
is left over from an old boyfriend. I guess he forgot to take that one with him."

 Michael's brows lifted. "Old boyfriend? Should I be jealous?"

 "What? Did you think I've been living like a nun all these years? There have been other men." The microwave beeped and Dani went to get the popcorn. "Why don't you put in
Key Largo
? I haven't seen that one in a long time."

 "Women," Michael said good-naturedly under his breath. He took out the tape and popped it in, then sat down on the couch and hit play on the remote. Dani came back into the room with the bowl of popcorn and a bottle of spring water for herself. Watching her sit down beside him, Michael couldn't help but notice she looked good, even in sweats. She had taken her hair out of its French braid and it fell loosely around her shoulders. She looked warm and inviting, but he forced himself not to bridge the few inches that separated them.

 "I love this movie," Dani said between mouthfuls of popcorn. "The little innuendoes and the looks that pass between Bogie and Bacall. I love it almost as much as
Casablanca
."

 "Yeah, you and Cathy both," Michael said, scooping up a handful of buttery popcorn and tossing it into his mouth.

 Dani chuckled. "Cathy and I were both old movie freaks in college. We'd stay up late and watch the old movie channel, then have to skip our morning class in order to get some sleep. When movies came out on video, we both had to have a copy."

 "Ah, so that's how you both ended up with the same tapes huh? Except Cathy doesn't have any Stallone ones."

 Dani gave Michael a sideways look and threw a piece of popcorn at him, making them both laugh. They settled into a comfortable quiet watching the movie for awhile. After a time, Dani broke the silence.

 "Why did you break it off with Cathy?"

 "Me?" Michael looked confused. "I didn't break it off with Cathy, it was her idea."

 Dani stared at him. "Why?"

 He sat a moment, collecting his thoughts before answering. "She wanted more out of the relationship than I could offer. We had a lot of good times, but I wasn't ready to make it permanent." He sighed a little. "I haven't changed all that much, I guess."

 "Do you still have feelings for her?" She had to know. After all, Cathy was her best friend and she didn't want any hard feelings between them now that she and Miguel had rekindled their friendship.

 "Cathy is a great person and I'll always care about her. But she and I are just friends now, nothing more. Besides," he added, "she's seeing that accountant guy now and they seem to be hitting it off fairly well."

 Dani's eyebrows rose as she looked at him. "And you're okay with that?"

 "Of course. I want her to be happy."

 Dani turned her attention back to the movie, but her heart was dancing a little. And it beat even faster when a few minutes later Michael reached past the popcorn bowl and took her hand in his. He just held it, occasionally rubbing his thumb along the side of her palm, a simple gesture of familiarity. It felt warm and sweet, like the movie they were sharing, and Dani appreciated the fact that he was letting her decide just how far things would go between them tonight.

Chapter Fourteen

 When the movie ended Dani sighed and stretched as Michael hit the off button on the control. Taking the bowl and her empty water bottle, she walked over to the kitchen and set them on the counter and then flicked off the light over the stove and headed back to stand beside the couch. Michael was still sitting in the corner of it, watching her.

 For a moment their eyes connected. "Well," she said finally, "it's pretty late. I guess I'll go to bed."

 Michael only looked at her, no expression reflecting his thoughts.

 "Do you want me to help you get the couch ready?" she offered, uneasy as to how to end the evening.