Memoirs of a Physician (45 page)

” What, sir ! you will not allow me to introduce you ? I

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know I am not worthy of the honor, and that a name like yours needs no announcement “

” Sir, I am aware that you are more at court than I am anywhere in the world. I do not refuse your offer, therefore, from any motives personal to yourself, but I love my liberty. I wish to go as if I were merely taking a walk, and in short, that is my ultimatum.”

” Sir, I bow to your decision, and should be most unwilling to displease you in any particular. The rehearsal commences at six o’clock.”

” Very well. At a quarter before six I shall be at Trianon.”

” But by what conveyance ? “

‘* That is my affair these are my horses.”

He pointed to his legs, which were well formed, and displayed with some pretension.

” Five leagues ! ” said M. de Coigny, alarmed ; ” you will be knocked up take care, it will be a fatiguing evening i “

” In that case, .. have my carriage and my horses also a fraternal carriage the popular vehicle, which belongs to my neighbor as well as to myself, and which costs only fifteen sous.”

” Oh, good heavens ! The stage-coach ! You make me shudder.”

” Its benches, which seem to you so hard, are to me like the Sybarite’s couch. To me they seem stuffed with down or strewn with rose leaves. Adieu, sir, till this evening.”

M. de Coigny, seeing himself thus dismissed, took his leave after a multitude of thanks, indications more or less precise, and expressions of gratitude for his services. He descended the dark staircase, accompanied by Eousseau to the landing, and by Therese half-way down the stairs.

M. de Coigny entered his carriage, which was waiting in the street, and drove back to Versailles, smiling to himself.

Therese returned to the apartment, slamming the door with angry violence which foretold a storm for Eousseau.

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CHAPTER XLII.

R U S S E A U’S TOILET.

WHEN” M. de Coigny was gone,, Rousseau, whose ideas this visit had entirely changed, threw himself into a little armchair, with a deep sigh, and said, in a sleepy tone :

” Oh ! how tiresome this is. How these people weary me with their persecutions ! “

Therese caught the last words as she entered, and placing herself before Eousseau:

“How proud we are!” said she.

“I?” asked Rousseau, surprised.

” Yes ; you are a vain fellow a hypocrite ! “

” I ? “

” Yes, you ; you are enchanted to go to court, and you conceal your joy under this false indifference.”

” Oh, good heavens ! ” replied Rousseau, shrugging his shoulders, and humiliated at being so truly described.

” Do you not wish to make me believe that it is not a great honor for you to perform for the king the airs you thump here upon your spinet, like a good-for-nothing, as you are ? “

Rousseau looked angrily at his wife.

” You are a simpleton ! ” said he ; ” it is no honor for a man such as I am to appear before a king. To what does this man owe that he is on the throne? To a caprice of nature, which gave him a queen as his mother; but I am worthy of being called before the king ta minister to his recreation. It is to my works I owe it and to the fame acquired by my works.”

Therese was not a woman to be so easily conquered.

“I wish Monsieur de Sartines heard you talking in this style ; he would give you a lodging in Bicetre or a cell at Charenton.”

” Because this Monsieur de Sartines is a tyrant in the pay of another tyrant, and because man is defenseless

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against tyrants with the aid of his genius alone. But if Monsieur de Sartines were to persecute me “

“Well, what, then?” asked Therese.

” Ah, yes ! ” sighed Eousseau, ” yes, I know that would delight my enemies.”

“Why have you enemies?” continued Therese. “Because you are ill-natured, and because you have attacked every one. Ah, Monsieur de Voltaire knows how to make friends, he does ! “

” True,” said Rousseau, with an angelic smile.

” But, dame ! Monsieur de Voltaire is a gentleman he is the intimate friend of the King of Prussia; he has horses, he is rich, and lives at his chateau at Ferney. And all that he owes to his merit. Therefore, when he goes to court, he does not act the disdainful man he is quite at home there.”

” And do you think,” said Rousseau, ” that I shall not be at home there? Think you that I do not know where all the money that is spent there comes from, or that I am duped by the respect which is paid to the master. Oh, my good woman, who judgest everything falsely, remember if I act the disdainful, it is because I really feel contempt remember that if I despise the pomp of these courtiers, it is because they have stolen their riches.”

” Stolen ! ” said Therese, with inexpressible indignation.

” Yes, stolen from you from me from every one. All the gold they have upon their fine clothes should be restored to the poor wretches who want bread. That is the reason why I, who know all these things, go so reluctantly to court.”

” I do not say that the people are happy but the king is ahvays the king.”

” Well, I obey him ; what more does he want ? “

” Ah ! you obey because you are afraid. You must not say, in my hearing, that you go against your will, or that you are a brave man, for if so, I shall reply that you are a hypocrite, and that you are very glad to go.”

” I do not fear anything,” said Rousseau, superbly.

” Good ! Just go and say to the king one quarter of what you have been telling me the last half-hour.”

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” I shall assuredly do so, if my feelings prompt me.”

“You?”

“Yes. Have I ever recoiled?”

” Bah ! You dare not take a bone from a cat when she is gnawing it, for fear she should scratch you. What would you be if surrounded by guards and swordsmen? Look you. I know you as well as if I were your mother. You will just now go and shave yourself afresh, oil your hair, and make yourself beautiful; you will display your leg to the utmost advantage ; you will put on your interesting little winking expression, because your eyes are small and round, and if you opened them naturally, that would be seen, while, when you wink, you make people believe that they are as large as carriage entrances. You will ask me for your silk stockings; you will put on your chocolate-colored coat with steel buttons and your beautiful new wig; you will order a coach, and my philosopher will go and be adored by the ladies ! And to-morrow ah ! to-morrow, there will be such ecstatic reveries, such interesting languor ! You will come back amorous, you will sigh and write verses, and you will dilute your coffee with your tears. Oh ! how well I know you.”

” You are wrong, my dear,” said Eousseau. ” I tell you, I am reluctantly obliged to go to court. I go because, after all, I fear to cause scandal, as every honest citizen should do. Moreover, I am not one of those who refuse to acknowledge the supremacy of one citizen in a republic ; but as to making advances, as to brushing my new coat against the gold spangles of these gentlemen of the CEil-de-Bceuf no, no; I shall do nothing of the sort, and if you catch me doing so, laugh at me as much as you please.”

” Then you will not dress ? ” said Therese, sarcastically.

” Fo.”

” You will not put on your new wig ? “

“No.”

” You will not wink with your little eyes ? “

” I tell you I shall go like a free man, without affectation and without fear. I shall go to court as if I were go-ing to the theater, and let the actors like me or not, I care not for them.”

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” Oh ! you will at least trim your beard,” said Therese; ” it is half a foot long.”

” I tell you I shall make no change.”

Therese burst into so loud and prolonged a laugh that Eousseau was obliged to take refuge in the next room. But the housekeeper had not finished her persecutions ; she had them of all colors and kinds.

She opened the cupboard and took out his best coat, his clean linen, and beautifully polished shoes. She spread all these articles out upon the bed and over the chairs in the apartment ; but Eousseau did not seem to pay the least attention.

At last Therese said:

” Come, it is time you should dress. A court toilet is tedious. You will have barely time to reach Versailles at the appointed hour.”

” I have told you, Therese, that I shall do very well as I am. It is the same dress in which I present myself every day among my fellow-citizens. A king is but a citizen like myself.”

” Come, come,” said Therese, trying to tempt him and bring him to her purpose by artful insinuation ; ” do not pout, Jacques, and don’t be foolish. Here are your clothes. Your razor is ready; I have sent for the barber, in case you have your nervousness to-day.”

” Thank you, my dear,” replied Eousseau ; ” I shall only just give myself a brush, and take my shoes because I can-not go out in slippers ‘*

” Is he going to be firm, I wonder ? ” thought Therese.

She tried to coax him, sometimes by coquetry, sometimes by persuasion, and sometimes by the violence of her raillery. But Eousseau knew her and saw the snare. He felt that the moment he should give way, he would be unmerci-fully disgraced and ridiculed by his better half. He determined, therefore, not to give way, and abstained from looking at the fine clothes, which set off what he termed his natural advantages.

Therese watched him. She had only one resource left; this was the glance which Eousseau never failed to give in

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the glass before he went out ; for the philosopher was neat to an extreme, if there can be an extreme in neatness.

But Kousseau continued to be on his guard, and as he caught Therese’s anxious look, he turned his back to the looking-glass. The hour arrived, the philosopher had filled his head with all the disagreeable remarks he could think of to say to the king.

He repeated some scraps of them to himself while he buckled his shoes, then tucked his hat under his arm, seized his cane, and taking advantage of a moment when Therese could not see him. he pulled down his coat and his waistcoat with both hands to smooth the creases.

Therese now returned, handed him a handkerchief, which he plunged into his huge pocket, and then accompanied him to the landing-place, saying:

” Come, Jacques, be reasonable ; you look quite frightful you have the air of some false inoneyer.”

” Adieu ! ” said Eousseau.

” You look like a thief, sir,” said Therese ; ” take care ! “

” Take care of fire,” said Eousseau, ” and do not touch my papers.”

” You have just the air of a spy, I assure you ! ” said Therese, in despair.

Eousseau made no reply; he descended the steps, singing, and favored by the obscurity, he gave his hat a brush with his sleeve, smoothed his shirt frill with his left hand, and touched up his toilet with a rapid but skilful movement.

Arrived at the foot of the stairs, he bodily confronted the mud of the Bue Plastriere, walking upon tiptoe, and reached the Champs-Elysees, where those honest vehicles which, so rather affectedly called pataclies, were stationed, and which, so late as ten years ago, still carried, or rather bundled, from Paris to Versailles those travelers who were obliged to use economy.

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THE SIDE SCENES OP TRIANON.

THE adventures of the journey are of no importance. A Swiss, an assistant clerk, a citizen, and an abbe were of course among his traveling companions.

He arrived at half-past five. The court was already assembled at Trianon, and the performers were going over their parts while waiting for the king ; for as to the author, no one thought of him. Some were aware that M. Rousseau, of Geneva, was to come to direct the rehearsal; but they took no greater interest in seeing M. Rousseau than M. Rameau, or M. Marmontel, or any other of those singular animals, to a sight of which the courtiers sometimes treated themselves in their drawing-rooms or country houses.

Rousseau was received by the usher in waiting, who had been ordered by M. de Coigny to inform him as soon as the philosopher should arrive.

This young nobleman hastened with his usual courtesy, and received Rousseau with the most amiable empres.se-ment…But scarcely had he cast his eyes over his person, than he stared with astonishment, and could not prevent himself from recommencing the examination.

Rousseau was dusty, pale, and disheveled, and his paleness rendered conspicuous such a beard as no master of the ceremonies had ever seen reflected in the mirrors of Versailles.

Rousseau felt deeply embarrassed under M. de Coigny’s scrutiny, but more embarrassed still when, approaching the hall of the theater, he saw the profusion of splendid dresses, valuable lace, diamonds, and blue ribbons, which, with the gilding of the hall, produced the effect of a bouquet of flowers in an immense basket.

Rousseau felt ill at ease also when he breathed this perfumed atmosphere, so intoxicating for plebeian nerves.

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Yet he was obliged to proceed and put a bold face on the matter. Multitudes of eyes were fixed upon him who thus formed a stain, as it were, on the polish of the assembly. M. de Coigny, still preceding him, led him to the orchestra, where the musicians were waiting for him.

When there, he felt rather relieved, and while his music was being performed, he seriously reflected that the worst danger was past, that the step was taken, and that all the reasoning in the world could now be of no avail.

Already the dauphiness was on the stage, in her costume as Colette ; she waited for Colin.

M. de Coigny was changing his dress in his box.

All at once the king entered, surrounded by a crowd of bending heads. Louis smiled, and seemed to be in the best humor possible. The dauphin seated himself at his right hand, and the Count de Provence, arriving soon after, took his place on the left. On a sign from the king, the fifty persons who composed the assembly, private as it was, took their seats.