Meeting The Unpredictable (17 page)

FOR WEEKS, I’VE REPEATEDLY TOLD
myself that I don’t like Lennie. I kept telling myself that long after I knew I was lying. Then I went and had sex with her. Other than Amber, the only other woman I’ve had sex with were ones I had just met. Feelings or emotions of any kind didn’t play a part in the act we shared. When Lennie first suggested a friends with benefits concept, I was horny and not thinking about the big picture, the one where I would end up falling for her, and I’m afraid that’s exactly what’s happened because my heart is officially invested in Lennie Jacobs. Unfortunately, the only thing she’s known for is leaving. After my relationship with Amber, I never thought I would allow myself to open up to anyone again, least of all to someone as unpredictable as Lennie, but somewhere along the way, I managed to fall for her. Now I’m doing everything in my power to give her a reason to stay. A reason to pick me.

***

I’M IN THE MIDDLE OF
a new case when I hear a knock at the door. Lennie hasn’t knocked in over a week, not to mention she left about an hour ago to help out at the shelter. I pull open the door and within seconds, my stomach turns.

“Please tell me that woman isn’t here.”

“What do you want, Mom?” Her eyes narrow. My parents never cared what I did as a teenager, but that doesn’t mean my mother hasn’t demanded respect from anyone who speaks to her—especially her children.

“I didn’t like the way things were left last week. I decided to stop by and check on you.”

My mother never stops by. If she wants to see anyone in the family, she beckons them to her house.

“Really? You were worried about me?”

Her eyes thin. “Don’t start, young man.” Mom puts her hand on my door and pushes it open. She makes her way into my living room and takes a seat on my couch. “I’m sorry,” she says softly, causing my eyes to narrow.

“For what?”

Mom watches me for several long moments before she sighs in frustration. “I hate what’s happened. I remember the day I discovered Brandon and Amber together. I...” Her voice shakes. “I’ve never been more disappointed in one of my kids as I was in that moment.” My mouth drops open as I take the seat across from her. “I told Brandon that, too. I know neither of them were innocent. At that point, I didn’t want either of my boys to end up with her, but he kept insisting they were in love. Somewhere along the way, I convinced myself what happened was a good thing. They were in love and you deserved to find someone who’d properly love you. But I didn’t know...” She sniffles before wiping at her eyes. “I should have known. As your mother, I should have known. I got so caught up in being a grandmother that I didn’t pay enough attention to my own baby to see even after all these years you are still suffering.”

I rub my hands over my face. Until Lennie stood up for me, I didn’t realize how much I needed someone on my side. How much I needed my family to acknowledge that my perfect older brother isn’t as foolproof as everyone believes.

“Thank you,” I whisper. “I’m over the fact that Amber cheated on me. I was over that months after it happened, but...” I clear my throat. “I’ve never moved past what Brandon did to me.” A lot of that has to do with the fact that he’s never once apologized.

“I understand.” My eyes narrow. “I wish that wasn’t the case. I want my children to get along, but I understand why you can’t forgive him.”

“Do you really, Mom? Brandon has always been your favorite.”

Mom shakes her head. “Oh, Tyler...Brandon will say the same about you. I’m sorry if I ever made you feel second to any of your brothers.”

I sigh in defeat. I never felt second best growing up. “I just wish...you had told me this years ago.”

“Me too. You did a good job pretending you were okay, and I allowed myself to believe that was true.”

“Thank you, Mom. I really appreciate this.” She might be over six years late, but she’s finally said the words I’ve needed to hear.

“I’ll make sure to let you know if Brandon and Amber are going to be visiting when you come from now on.”

“Thank you.” She looks around my apartment. “Is it safe to assume you brought that woman to the house to make a point?”

I groan, knowing exactly where the conversation is heading. “What point would that have been?”

Mom huffs before rolling her eyes. “Oh come on, Tyler. You’ve barely dated since Amber, and you certainly haven’t brought a woman home since you were a kid. Then when you finally do, it’s a woman that’s...the exact opposite of anyone you’d date.”

I pinch the bridge of my nose, hoping to relieve some of the tension that’s building. “Mom, I unexpectedly met Lennie. She’s...not like anyone I’ve ever met before. She’s staying with her sister who happens to live across the hall.”

“Sweetheart, you make good money and—”

“Mom.” I cut her off before she can say something that will piss me off. “Lennie’s family comes from more money than I’ll ever see. She’s not hanging out with me because of how much money I have in my checking account, and it’s rude of you to imply otherwise.”

She nods her head. “Her tattoos are...”

“Are completely Lennie.” I smile, picturing how her face lights up when I ask her about her ink.

“I grew up thinking tattoos were something low life criminals had. I’ll admit when I first saw Lennie’s I judged her, but thankfully she didn’t hold that against me, because not only did I discover how wrong I was about her, I learned that every tattoo she has means something.”

Mom gives me a grim smile. “Are you saying...you’re serious about her?”

I shrug. “All I know for sure is she means something to me.” Mom silently watches me. She doesn’t like Lennie, and unless she drops what happened at dinner the other night, she probably never will.

“I’m going to have to trust your judgment.” My eyes widen in disbelief. “I was hoping that woman was your way of making a long overdue point, but if that’s not the case...if you...actually feel something for her, then I’ll figure out a way to like her.”

The corner of my smile turns up. “Thank you, Mom.”

She stands up and walks toward me with open arms. “I love you,” she whispers into my ear.

“I love you, too.” I never in a million years expected my mom to fix six years of problems in one short conversation, but somehow she did.

TODAY I LIED TO EVERYONE
and hid from the world. I needed a day to myself. A day where I wasn’t forced to hide myself from the only two people I care about. I have less than two weeks until my world as I currently know it vanishes. You can’t keep secrets from the people you care about and expect them not to be upset, but that’s exactly what I’ve done.

“Hey.” I glance over my shoulder as Tyler makes his way into the pool area. “You’re out here pretty late.”

I shrug. “So are you.”

“I’m only out here because of you.” My eyes narrow in question. “I saw your car in the parking lot, but Jodi said you weren’t home. I decided to wander around looking for you.”

Tyler drops down next to me and puts his feet into the water. “You want to talk about it?”

I breathe in deeply. “Talk about what?”

Tyler places his hand on top of mine. “Whatever is bothering you.”

I smile to myself. Tyler hasn’t known me for long, but he already knows me better than anyone else. “I’ve been thinking...” I pause to regain my emotions. “I don’t throw myself pity parties because there’s nothing to gain from them, but I think I did today.” My gaze travels to his. “I can’t change my past, but my past predicts my future.”

His hand comes up to my cheek. “Why? Why can’t you have any future you want?” His question wreaks havoc on my already fragile emotions.

“Have you ever sacrificed something because in the moment you weren’t able to look at how it would affect your future?”

Tyler looks out at the pool for a moment before looking back at me. “You mean like instant gratification?”

I nod my head while he continues to watch me. “Sure, but not on a deep meaningful level. I’ve gone out drinking when I’ve had a meeting the next day. In college I passed up studying for a final when I shouldn’t have, but none of those things affect me today.”

My eyes wander to the dark night sky.

“Are you saying you did something in your past that won’t allow you to stay here in Dallas?”

I swallow, doing everything I can to fight my tears. “Yes,” I squeak.

Tyler sighs before his shoulders drop in defeat. “You can’t fix it? Whatever you did?”

A tear slips down my cheek. “I don’t know. The thing is...no matter how much I want to change it, I don’t think I have it in me to fight it.”
It.
That word isn’t strong enough, but I’m not ready to tell him, at least not tonight.

“I wish you’d tell me what you’re talking about. I could be a voice of reason if you’d give me a chance.”

I sniffle and lean into his shoulder. “I will soon just...not tonight.”

Tyler places his hand under my chin and forces me to look at him. “You barged into my life and demanded I be your friend. Now that’s exactly what I’m going to give you. Good, bad, or otherwise, I’ll be here for you.” I wrap my arms around his waist as he pulls me tight into his body.

For the first time in years, I’m ready to beg for a second chance at life.

***

“MOM CALLED ME AT MY
office today. She told me we were both expected at dinner tonight. I told her I have a big case I’m working on but she wouldn’t listen.”

“She wants to see us tonight?” My voice cracks with panic.

“Yes. I don’t know what’s going on. She called and told me the two of us are to be out there tonight or else.”

They know...holy shit, they know.

“I can’t. I’m busy tonight.”

“Doing what?” she snaps. “I’m the one who actually has to work, Lennie. If I’m expected to stop everything at the drop of a hat, then you can, too.”

“I’m...” I trail off as my breathing picks up.

Jodi’s face softens with concern. “Lennie, what’s going on?”

“I didn’t...I didn’t...” I start shaking my head as the need to run is stronger than ever.

“You didn’t what?”

I rush to Jodi’s guest room and start shoving my things into my suitcase. Unfortunately, Jodi’s a few steps behind me.

“Lennie, stop for a damn minute and tell me what’s going on.”

“I never made an appointment!” I scream.

Instantly, her face pales. “What? But...you came back here for your appointment.”

“No, I didn’t.”

Jodi starts shaking her head. “But—”

“I lied. I tried to call. Hell, I actually did a few times, but I hung up before they made me one.” No one’s actually asked when my appointment is, but I still lied by not correcting my family when they assumed I had one.

“Why?” I see the fire in her eyes. She’s pissed and rightfully so.

“This is the year we’ve all been waiting for and now you’re telling me what exactly?” Her face turns beat red as she waits for me to reply.

“Lennie, this is our chance to finally put this whole mess behind us.”

I shake my head no as tears fill my eyes. “It’s back.”

Jodi gasps before placing her hand over her stomach. “You said you...didn’t have an appointment, so how could you—”

“I don’t need a damn test to tell me what I already know.” My hands start trembling.

“If you know then why haven’t you...” Her eyes flash with pain. “No, Lennie.”

I force myself to look away as I continue tossing things into my bag.

“You’re a damn coward.” Her words startle me. “When you were in that damn hospital fighting for your life, you think I wasn’t affected? You think when Mom and Dad took off to unknown parts of the world to get you help I wasn’t affected? Well, I was, damn it.” Her chest heaves with anger. “Just like you, I sacrificed a lot, and you’re not going to stand here and tell me it was for nothing.”

Before I have the chance to say anything else, she turns around and storms out of the room. I sag to the floor in tears.

When I’m hundreds of miles away from my family, it’s easy to forget they love me. When your parents yell at you more than compliment you, it makes avoiding them easy. Months ago, I made a choice to stop fighting, and I promised myself I would live my life to the fullest.

If only I could have predicted meeting Tyler, or if I could have remembered how much Jodi loves me, I’d go back to the day I officially gave up and kick my own ass.