Meeting Destiny (11 page)

Seth did not respond. He didn’t look at me, as if my words didn’t even register. I continued, “You deserve someone who loves you back - the way I know you want me to love you. I know that I won’t feel that way about you. You need to find the right person for you. I’m not her.”

A long silence followed before he finally spoke, “So, you’re breaking up with me, is that it?”

“
Yes.” I knew I shouldn’t say anything more.

“
I’m not mad about you telling me to leave last night.” Of course, he would think this had something to do with me tossing him out of my room.

“
Good, but I had a lot of time to think, and I know I’m not the right person for you.”

“
You’re just under a lot of stress. You’ll feel differently in a few days.” He still didn’t look at me, and I was sure from his expression that he really didn’t believe me.

“
Seth, I’m not saying this because I’m stressed out. I’m saying this because it’s the truth, and it’s not fair to keep pretending that one day I’ll wake up and feel differently. We graduate in a few months. I think you should enjoy your last few months of college, not hovering around me like an old mother hen.”

While I was talking, his expression was tense, then it eased and relief spread across his face. “Oh, I get it. You’re worried that if I take care of you while you’re laid up, that I’ll miss out on some rite-of-passage? There’s no one, anywhere on earth, that I would want to spend time with more than you.”

“
No, Seth, really, I think you should get out and date. Meet new people.”

“
Where is this coming from? Is this because of last night? Lauren, I’m going to take care of you, not because I feel sorry for you, but because I love you. I don’t want to talk about this anymore.” He reached for the volume on the stereo and turned it up in an effort to dissuade me from saying anything else.

Frustrated at his complete disbelief and utter disregard for my wishes, I reached for the volume and turned the stereo back down. This couldn’t wait one more minute. “Seth, you need to decide right now if you want to continue being my friend. You are not my boyfriend as of right now, and if being my friend is not enough, then we are nothing to one another, do you understand?” My words sounded harsh, but I didn’t want for there to be any confusion.

His obliviousness seemed to subside as I watched him, and saw that my words were sinking in. “Of course, I’m your friend. I don’t know what’s gotten into you, but I have half a mind to…to…” Seth trailed off, anger edging into his voice. He seemed unable to continue.

Realizing for the first time how volatile this had the potential to be, I eased my annoyance with him down an octave and replied quietly, “I think it would be better if you just drop me at my house, and maybe we take a break from each other for a few days.”

Seth didn’t respond. We drove in silence as I looked out the window, willing the pavement to move faster. I could see we were nearly to our houses and was relieved that this was almost over. A few final minutes passed before Seth pulled into his driveway. He got out, opened the trunk and retrieved my wheelchair and crutches. I opened my door and there was Seth standing with the wheelchair.

“
Here, let me help you.” Seth eased me into the wheelchair and wheeled me to the front door. We got to the bottom step and he asked politely, “Do you want to give the crutches a try?”

“
Sure.” I took the crutches and made my way awkwardly up the steps. Seth followed a few feet behind me, to make sure I didn’t crash. As he stood a few feet inside my house, I could tell he wanted to help me, he wanted to reach out to me.

“
I’m going upstairs. I’ll be fine, Seth. Thanks for all your help. I really think it would be best if we don’t see each other for a while.”

“
Whatever you want, take your time. Give me a call when you want to see me again. I’ll be patient. Like I told you - I love you enough for both of us. When the realization hits you that you’ve made a huge mistake, call me. I promise not to hold any grudges.” Seth made an effort to kiss my mouth, but I turned my head again, so he kissed my cheek and gave my shoulders a gentle squeeze. Then his phrase that I have become so accustomed to was whispered one final time in my ear, “I miss you already.”

Had last night not happened, had I not been so completely convinced that I had found the one person in the world I was truly destined for, my exchange with Seth would have likely brought me to tears.

But last night did happen. I know Max and I were brought together by something so much more powerful than a simple accident. I felt terrible for hurting Seth. I knew this was something I should have done years ago; Seth deserved someone who could love him equally. It was selfish of me to keep leading him on. One day he would appreciate that I was finally honest with him.

That day was not today.

I found my mom in the kitchen having just unloaded the last of the flowers. “If you are feeling up to it, I think it would be a good idea to send thank-you notes for all the flowers.”

Appreciative of the distraction, “Sounds good.” I hobbled awkwardly to the bouquet from Melissa that had been by my bed in the hospital. I pulled the card that was in the card holder and panic hit me. Max’s card wasn’t there! Where was it? The memory of hearing his answering machine and me throwing his card away came into focus. I was furious with myself. What an idiot! How was I going to call him? Max didn’t have my number. I hid the dread I was suddenly feeling so my mom wouldn’t see. “I’m going to go up to my room to write the thank-you notes, okay?”

My mom turned around, “It’s okay with me. Can you navigate the steps?”

“
We’ll know in a minute. If you hear me falling, we’ll both know I can’t,” I replied with a smile, hoping my humor camouflaged my frustration. She chuckled back at me as I collected all the mini cards from the card holders in the flower arrangements.

“
I’ve put all the cards and letters that came in the mail in your room. There must be fifty in the pile. I’ll run out and buy some more thank-you cards.”

I made it up the steps without incident. I lay on my bed and reached for my phone and dialed information. The automated attendant transferred me to a real person and the directory assistance human cheerfully informed me of seventeen listings for Max Meyers in the Charleston area. Having no idea where Max lived, I asked, “Could you give me all seventeen numbers?”

The human stated, “I can give you five.” She rattled off the first five numbers of the seventeen. I dialed the first number and got an answering machine. I hung up without leaving a message, knowing that it wasn’t the same answering machine I had heard a couple days ago.

When I tried the second number, a lady picked up on the second ring. “Hi, this is Lauren, I’d like to speak with Max?” The lady answered, “This is Max.”

I know I sounded a little flustered when I asked, “I’m sorry, this is Max Meyer?”

She answered, “Yes, Maxine Meyer.”

“
I am so sorry, I have the wrong number. We both hung up, and I called the other three numbers without hitting the jackpot.

Extremely frustrated with myself, I got ready to dial information again. I looked at the stack of unopened cards and all the cards I had pulled from flower arrangements. I found that I wasn’t feeling very thankful for anything and laid down on my bed. After a few minutes, I felt myself drifting off to sleep and did nothing to resist.

I found myself in a fitful sleep, images of the shooter, of Max in my night-washed room, Seth’s hurt look this morning, all mixed together. The dream of Max coming to me and telling me how urgent it was for me to find him, got all jumbled up with the events at the hospital, with the exchange between Seth and Max, Felecia worried about my heart monitor, then - a ray of hope. Doctor Gracie told me he had received several calls from Max. I awoke with a start, sitting straight up in bed. He must have Max’s number, or at least knew a way to contact him! I dialed information again, but asked for the number to the hospital this time.

When a receptionist at the hospital came on the line, I asked if she could connect me to Doctor Gracie. I was connected to his voice mail and left a message, “Doctor Gracie, I’m sorry to bother you. This is Lauren Davis, your gun shot patient, and I was hoping you could give me a call at your earliest convenience…” I left my number and sat back in my bed, thrilled that I’d soon have Max’s number.

I grabbed the stack of cards and opened each one. I was shocked that only five came from people I knew. I counted sixty-one from complete strangers. One message tugged at my heart more than any other.

Dearest Lauren,

I have no idea how to thank you. Fred is my son. You saved his life yesterday. No amount of money will ever repay your sacrifice, but I felt it necessary to do something. Please accept this as a small token of my appreciation and know that for the rest of my life I will remember what you did for my son and our family. I wish you a speedy recovery, and, if there is ever anything I can do for you, please don’t hesitate to ask.

Love,

Maggie Lawrence.

Inside the card was a check for twenty thousand dollars.

Shock overtook me. How should I write a thank-you note for this one? Could I even keep this money? I’m sure my parents would say no. I set it aside as I opened the rest of the cards. I was shocked by how many cards from strangers came with cash and checks. One from a car dealer said I could have any car on his lot at cost. All the inscriptions were much the same, calling me a hero, saying how brave I was, or thanking me for a friend or a loved one who had been in the restaurant during the robbery. It was overwhelming, and all told I had received more than twenty-five thousand dollars from grateful strangers.

I began writing thank-you notes, but after ten handwritten notes, I realized that this was something I would have to pace myself for. I had been at it for a couple hours and my hand was throbbing. When the phone rang, I picked it up on the first ring, hoping to catch it before my mom could.

“
Hello,” I responded into the receiver.

“
This is Doctor Gracie from Saint Joseph’s. Is Lauren available?”

“
Hi, Doctor. This is Lauren. Thanks for calling me back!”

“
Lauren, are you okay?”

“
Oh, yeah, I’m fine, safe and sound at home. I have a weird request for you. Max Meyers was the paramedic who got me to the hospital. Do you know how I can reach him?”

There was an audible sigh on the phone. “Lauren, I’m not an answering service. I’m very busy.”

“
Doctor Gracie, I’m so sorry to ask, but I needed to ask him something about what happened at the restaurant, and I don’t know how to get a hold of him. I tried information, but I don’t know if he’s listed, and there are a ton of Max Meyers in the area. You mentioned that he called you a few times that first night, so I hoped you knew how I could reach him.”

Unenthusiastically, Doctor Gracie responded, “Hold on, I’m sure I’ve got his number here somewhere.” He did find it and gave it to me. I thanked him profusely and assured him I was fine.

I dialed the phone immediately. It wasn’t the number I had called before; it must have been his cell phone. Max picked up on the second ring. “This is Max.”

A thrill rang through my voice. “Hi, Max, it’s Lauren.”

Nothing, silence. Did I dial the right number? “Hello? Are you there?”

“
Hi, Lauren, you must’ve made it home okay.” His words were something close to monotone, and I knew he was still stung by Seth’s words this morning.

“
Yeah, a couple hours ago. I’m sorry about this morning. I was thrilled to see you, but unfortunately I didn’t have time to talk to Seth alone before you arrived.”

“
Yeah, I got that. So did you talk to him?”

“
Seth drove me home, and on the way I broke it off officially with him.” There was a hopefulness in my voice that this would somehow fix the hurt I knew I had caused.

More silence, then Max asked, “So how’d he take it?”

I thought about it for a second, realizing I was so focused on convincing him that I really was serious, it didn’t occur to me how well Seth took the news. “Actually, he took it very well. He didn’t raise his voice or call me names or anything like you see on TV. He argued with me a little, telling me that I didn’t know what I was saying. But in the end he understood.”