McDonald_TWT_GENVers_Feb2014 (17 page)

“A lot—actually. She wasn’t always skinny. She used to weigh over two hundred pounds. I know because I was her roommate in college before her dramatic change into a fitness guru,” Edwina declared.

Koka felt his eyebrows go up. “Why didn’t you tell me she was your friend? I wouldn’t have fought so hard about having her on as a guest. I also might have been kinder in expressing my disbelief.”

Edwina grinned and shrugged. “Because I wouldn’t exactly say she’s my friend. It’s more like I feel a need to make up to Ellen for all the ugly things I once thought and felt. She was a perfectly nice person, but I wasn’t always kind about her issues. I was just as direct with her as I am with you. Weight was never a problem for me. And teenagers are much too selfish to appreciate anyone’s struggles but their own.”

Koka looked at the woman on the book cover with new eyes. “The change was certainly dramatic.”

Edwina nodded. “During our initial interview, she told me it took her eight years to reach a size and weight that she was comfortable with. I can’t imagine the kind of effort that must have taken. Along the way, she had married and had a family. She said pregnancy was the only time she ever backslid and packed on the pounds again.”

“I was overweight as a teenager too. It took me over a decade to lose the weight, but by the time I was twenty-five I was okay with how I looked, or at least I was in my head. Lifting weights has taught me body sculpting, but I sometimes think I have replaced one obsession with another,” Koka said.

“Well, you’ve done a great job sculpting yourself. Your body is a machine. How overweight were you?” Edwina asked.

Koka lifted his gaze from the book to Edwina’s. He searched her eyes wondering how much he should admit. He rarely told anyone, and when he did, almost no one ever believed him.

“I lost two hundred eighteen pounds. What I have gained back in weight since is mostly muscle,” Koka said.

“Wow,” Edwina exclaimed. She stared at his nearly perfect body sitting in the chair. “If I didn’t know how incredibly honest you were, I would think you were lying. But you’re not, are you?”

Koka shook his head. “No. I lost the weight as Halia grew up. For the first ten years of her life, she watched me reinvent my physical self year after year. The muscle building was just one of the tricks I tried, but I liked the results of that most. What I didn’t account for was the very different way I would be perceived once I got to what I look like now. I think I am still adjusting. And I admit I think poorly of those who think they know who I am by judging the way I look.”

Edwina laughed. “Now I get it. Sabine Blakeman’s mistake at the bachelor auction is exactly why you liked her so much. And in her line of work, I imagine she sees right past a person’s exterior anyway. Combine that with her beautiful face and quick wit and you get the perfect woman.”

“I won’t argue your conclusion. Sabine is unique, and nearly perfect in every way,” Koka said. “Tell your author friend I’m happy to have her on my show. I’ll look through her book tonight. Maybe we can schedule her later this week if she’s free. You’re going to have to modify the set though if I’m going to keep having guests. Sabine and I were okay with the tight space, but I don’t imagine others will take my arm swipes so graciously.”

“Depends on how attracted they are to you,” Edwina said, laughing at the glare she received. “I’m teasing. I’ll have the guys work on it after today’s shoot. I imagine it won’t take much to expand the set two or three feet. It’s the camera guys who’ll have to make the real change. We’ll have to do fewer close-ups of that pretty face of yours.”

“I plan to marry Sabine,” Koka said, annoyed when Edwina laughed again.

“
Marry her?
Didn’t the woman just get divorced?”

Koka sighed. “Yes. But not from me.”

Edwina shook her head. “I can only imagine the two of you debating that demand. She’s a forty-three-year-old mother of two who needs to drop about thirty pounds. I’m not saying she’s not pretty, but it’s obvious to everyone that she’s not as pretty as you. I bet she has doubts every moment of every day.”

“I cannot worry about changing what others think. It’s hard enough to change what Sabine thinks,” Koka declared.

Edwina steepled her fingers on her desk as she pondered something risky, but interesting. “What if we could change what everyone thinks?” she asked.

“What do you mean?” Koka asked back, not trusting the calculating glint in Edwina’s gaze on him.

“I have an idea, but it will only work if you think Sabine is worth the embarrassment,” Edwina declared.

***

“I promise I will not steal any pictures from you,” Koka swore, crossing his heart.

Pekala lifted her chin. “Even if I had such a picture in my memory box, what do you want with it?”

Koka sighed and sat in the chair Denise had put next to Pekala’s bed. “I’m going to use it for my show. I’m having a guest on this week who lost over a hundred pounds. I’d like one of myself when I had a similar amount to lose.”

“I don’t know if I have any of just you alone. You burned most of those,” Pekala said.

“Then I’ll take one of me and Leileiana. I know you and I fought over those. I’m sorry I was so mean about it. You were right that Halia has a right to understand her parents and know the past.”

Pekala frowned. “Begging is not like you, Koka. What’s wrong? Are you upset that your sunshine still stays away?”

“Yes,” Koka admitted. Pekala was the only person who could truly understand.

“Then you are allowed to be upset. I miss her too,” Pekala said sharply. “But she is coming back. I think Sabine just needs a little more time.”

Koka’s sigh echoed through the room. “Well, she is taking too long. I’m lonelier now than before I met her.”

“Now that sounds more like you. Maybe you will make it after all. This has taught you appreciation,” Pekala declared.

“
Kupunawahine
,” Koka said sternly in warning, but ended up sighing again when she laughed.

“You are so like your father and his father when you boom out in that big man Hawaiian voice. Sabine likes it though. You are a very lucky man,” Pekala said, nodding.

Koka sat quietly and stared at her for what had to be five minutes before his grandmother finally relented.

“Very well. The box is in the top of the closet behind the big stack of blankets. Be careful picking it up. It is as old as I am. The lock does not work well anymore,” she ordered.

A few minutes later, she passed him the only two pictures she had of him.

“
Mahalo
. These will do just fine,” he said.

“Swear again that you will return them to me,” Pekala ordered.

“I can do even better. I will scan them into my computer and not even take your copies from the house,” Koka said softly.

“You can do that?” Pekala said in amazement. “Wonderful. Send the one of you and Leileiana to Halia.”

“That’s a good suggestion. I guess I should talk to my daughter before I confess on TV,” Koka said.

Pekala snorted. “Halia has been looking at this picture of you and her mother since she was a young child. It was helpful to her to know the past so I showed it to her.”

“She has seen this picture? Why did she never tell me?” Koka asked.

Pekala shrugged. “Probably for the same reason you have trouble seeing why Sabine is struggling. Women are complex creatures. Their confidence does not come from lifting heavy things.”

“I never said women weren’t complex,” Koka denied. “And I’m not ashamed of the man I was. I just had to keep focused on where I was going. Lifting helped me.”

Pekala reached out and patted his hand. “You have a right to be proud. For women, the journey to their true self is an emotional jungle. But hopefully Sabine will realize that a big Hawaiian man with a machete wit might have his usefulness.”

“Sabine is fine like she is. I have no wish to change her. I just want her to forget her hurtful past and be happy with me,” Koka said.

“For Sabine, great patience and great love will be necessary for
Pilialoha
. You are capable of both,” Pekala said firmly.

Koka nodded. “The question is how long shall I wait to use my big man Hawaiian voice on her?”

Pekala laughed at her grandson’s teasing. “Your heart will lead you. Do what you plan. See her after.” She shrugged at his frown. “The clouds can move, but no one can tell the sun when to shine.”

Koka snorted. “Are you going to call her that when she moves in here with us?”

“Yes. She likes it. I will make her feel appreciated. Her first family did not do well with that,” Pekala said.

“You just want her to fix French toast for you again,” Koka said, laughing when Pekala smacked his arm with a strength that surprised him.

The call from Edwina inviting her to watch today’s show had come at the same time she had finally cleared the cobwebs from her brain. She had planned to come by earlier though and get the initial confrontation over, but the timing hadn’t worked out. For one, it had taken most of the morning to find another dress that fit well. She hadn’t seen Koka in over a week, and the weekend had been miserably long and lonely while she prowled her house and thought.

Now she stood behind privacy curtains chewing her lip while watching him set up for the show. He was probably too busy to talk at the moment, but once she had made up her mind, she decided seeing him again was too important to wait for another day.

“Somehow I didn’t see you as the hiding behind the curtains type,” Edwina said, stopping beside a wide-eyed Sabine Blakeman. “Thanks for coming. I was waiting until I saw you to tell him. He’s been a little more high-strung than usual lately.”

“It’s been a week since I talked to him. I’m being a coward. What if he’s mad at me? Maybe I waited too long before coming to see him,” Sabine offered in explanation.

Edwina snorted. “I’m sure that’s not the case. Koka’s only chewed through three spatulas this week. But there’s really only one way to find out how he’s feeling. Ask him. You know he’s not shy about answering direct questions.”

“I tried to get here earlier, but it didn’t work out. How bad is my timing?” Sabine asked.

Edwina checked her watch as she laughed. “Depending on what you have in mind, there’s forty minutes left before we start the intro. Want me to send him to my office to meet you so you have some privacy?”

Sabine shook her head, knowing they would attack each other. “No. It wouldn’t be a good idea for us to be alone until after his show. Just take my word for it.”

Edwina laughed again. “Okay. I think I will. Go and say hello while I find you a seat. He’s got a guest coming—one he didn’t have to blackmail this time. I think you’re going to see a whole different man today.”

Sabine laughed. “I think I’ll keep the man I have, but thanks.”

Laughing harder, Edwina walked through the set and on to her other tasks. After she disappeared, Sabine turned her attention back to Koka. She took a deep breath, pushed aside the déjà vu making her apprehensive, and walked toward him. The click-clacking of her heels on the cement floor had several gazes turning in her direction, but not the right one. She was almost in front of the counter when she stopped and cleared her throat loudly to get his attention.

“Hello,” she said, swallowing hard when Koka’s gaze finally lifted to hers.

The spatulas, spoons, and other cooking implements in his hands went clanging to the floor. Several interns and grips rushed over to scoop them up, scrambling on the set floor around his feet while he just continued to stare. Her laugh was nervous, but not forced when it finally escaped.

And she prayed fervently that she would always have the ability to stun him with her appearance.

“Another very nice dress. Blue looks really good on you, Sabine. And your curves are . . . not something I can comment on at the moment and keep my dignity,” he confessed.

“Blue looks good on you too,” Sabine replied, pointing at his shirt.

Koka looked down. “That’s right. I wore blue today. We match,” he said, raising his gaze to hers again.

Sabine snickered. “Well, that’s what I decided too. We match and that’s why I’m here. I’ve decided I want us to try dating . . .
real dating
. . . and I don’t care who knows. If you like the way I look and who I am, then that’s all I’m going to care about. And I won’t let your career suffer for it because I know how to fix those kinds of things. I also promise you that I’ll eventually lose the weight and look more like I belong with you. Until that happens though . . . I’m still here. I missed you like hell this week. So what do you say? Want to be
my right Todd
?”

Another anxious intern came running up with clean replacement utensils. Koka nodded at the clean ones and said thanks, asking the wide-eyed young woman to just lay them out on the counter.

Then he walked around the set kitchen and straight into the open arms of the woman he loved. Sabine’s happy laughter at his action brought all faces to them as he put his arms around her and hugged as hard as he could. Sabine truly was like sunshine when she was happy. He was going to keep her that way.

“
'O Ku'u Aloha No 'Oe
,” he whispered.

“I love you too. Later you can translate all those things you’ve been telling me. I’m ready to hear them now,” Sabine whispered back. “And thank you for waiting this week while I did my soul-searching.”

“Will you come home with me after the show?” he asked.

“Yes,” Sabine said. “Edwina offered me a seat for it. Can I stay?”

Koka thought about his plans, but nodded anyway. “So long as you do not run away. Promise me.”

“Why would I run away?” she asked.

“
Promise me
,” he insisted.

Sabine nodded. “Okay. I promise.” She was rewarded by a lip-tingling kiss just as insistent as his command.

Then she was free and he was striding back around the counter.

***

Unsure what to do next or where to go, Sabine turned and saw Edwina waving and pointing to an empty chair next to a man sitting behind a stationary camera. Nodding, she headed in that direction, hoping all the spandex she was wearing would allow her to sit. Unlike the full red dress, the new blue model was fitted and outlined her generous curves. She had wanted to look as sleek as possible today.