Mastering Lexie (Stronghold Book 4) (17 page)

Getting bored
at work, Lexie found herself feeling compelled to write Jake an email. 
Maybe because she'd scened with his best friend last night and would be at the
club again tonight?  Granted, she'd be working tonight, but still.  It was
hard to forget what she’d done
last
night, because her nipples still
ached and so did her ass, inside and out.  She felt a little awkward,
keeping that kind of secret from Jake.  Not that she shared every aspect
of her life with him, but this part now involved a guy that he basically
considered his brother.  Before today she'd never felt even the slightest
twinge of guilt about her crush on Patrick, but now that they'd done something
together, it was somehow different.

Still, she
wasn't going to let Jake or anyone else hold her back from what she
wanted.  It was her choice to make.  Not that she really thought
anyone would disapprove, but of course everyone worried.  So she wouldn't
say anything about that exactly.  But she didn't want him to get home and
have a conniption (as Hilary would say) because he didn't know that she'd been
going to Stronghold regularly.  The more she could prepare him, the
better, she figured.  And, hopefully, the less he would blame Patrick if
he was upset about her... activities.

They hadn’t
Skyped in about two weeks, which was fairly usual.  He had to split up his
Skype time between her parents, her, Patrick and any of his other friends.  No
girlfriend though, unfortunately.  In between Skypes, she usually wrote him
emails to let him know what was going on at home.  She’d learned, during his
first deployment, that he liked consistent updates, even if she didn’t really
have anything new to say.  It made him feel connected.  Sometimes she almost
used him as a diary, it felt like, but he said he liked it so she kept doing
it.

Hey
Jakie-poo,

She grinned,
knowing that he would growl at the salutation.  Their mom had called him
Jakie-poo until he was ten and had finally told her, in the way only an
exasperated pre-teen could, to cut it out.  Unfortunately for him, Lexie had
been old enough to remember.  When they were kids, she’d called him that to
annoy him.  Now it was said with more affection, and he only pretended to get
pissy about it.

I miss
you.  How're things on your side of the sea?  Not much new is going
on here during the day.  Mom and Dad are still bugging me about getting a
"real" job - like I'll somehow have a magic revelation about not
being a receptionist anymore.  I just can't think of anything that I'd
rather be doing.  I'm making enough money to do all the things I want to,
and I find it hard to care beyond that, although they don't seem to understand
that I'm just not feeling very career-motivated.

Hilary's
asked me to be a bridesmaid, which I'm SUPER excited about.  I didn't
expect it at all, which just makes it even better.  Angel's going to be a
bridesmaid too, and Jessica's her maid of honor.  I really can't wait for
you to come home and meet everyone!  Olivia's a groomsman along with the
rest of the guys.  I know you're going to love them as much as I do.
 

A few
nights a week I'm going to be at Stronghold - and not working!  I know, I
know, I won't go into detail.  But I just wanted to let you know. 
The Sentinels aren't happy about it, of course, but all the other submissives
backed me up, and so did Olivia.  The rest of the Doms and Dommes didn't
get involved.  I'm just happy because I feel like I'm finally getting what
I need.  That's all I'm going to say about that though, so no freaking out
on me.  If anything, it's your fault for having pervy friends, it must
have rubbed off on me =) 

I really do
like the club though, and finally having girl friends who are like me. 
I've been spending a lot of time with Angel and Leigh lately, and getting to
know Maria, and now that I'm a bridesmaid I'll probably be seeing Hilary and
Jessica even more.  It makes me really happy.  Not that I don't love
the guys, but having some estrogen around (and not just Olivia) has been really
nice.  I didn't realize how much I missed having girlfriends until
now. 

I really
miss you too though, everyone does.  We can't wait for you to come home...
if you're home by Halloween, you'll have to come to Stronghold to see the
awesome decorating job I do for the theme nights!  Don't worry, I'll
protect you from all the kinksters.  I know how those subbies frighten
you.

Love,

Lexie

After giving
the email a once over, Lexie hit send.  She felt like she'd done a pretty
good job of sliding in the info about her actually becoming involved in the
club without giving too much or too little information.  Couching it in
between talking about the other girls would hopefully mean that it didn't stand
out too much.  Not that Jake was too horribly overprotective - the
Sentinels were actually much worse when they were doing the big brother thing
in his stead - but email and Skype didn't really help her gauge his
reactions.  Even looking at him face to face over the computer wasn't the
same, because she couldn't see the rest of his body, and Jake had always been
good at controlling his facial expressions.

Whatever. 
She'd drop a few more hints along the way until he finally came home. 
There was only so much she could do, and then it was up to him to not freak
out.  She tapped her pen on her desk, making herself sit up straight
rather than slouching and resting her head on her hand like she wanted
to.  It wasn't a very professional look, after all.  Sending the
email to Jake hadn't made her feel that much better, because in the end, he
wasn't the one she needed to convince.

It didn't
really matter what Jake thought, although of course she wanted his approval,
but she was willing to fight for what she wanted.  Her life was hers and
no one else's, unless she chose to give them control over it.  Like she
wanted to with Patrick.  Even if Jake was upset at first, honestly, she
thought it would make him a pretty shitty big brother and best friend if he let
some weird, protective emotions keep her and Patrick from being happy.

Because after
last night, Lexie knew that Patrick made her very, very happy.  The scene
had been exactly the kind of thing she'd always fantasized about.  Parts
of her body still throbbed and ached a little bit, and she relished every
second of the lingering effects.  This was how she was meant to
feel.  Knowing that she was going to be working at the club tonight
excited her more than usual, like there was extra meaning behind her presence
there.  

Last night's
scene hadn't completely fulfilled her, of course, because Patrick hadn't
actually touched her with his hands or lips until the scene was over, but the
hope it engendered was enough.  For now.

******

Being back
behind the front desk at Stronghold after her first training session was making
Lexie antsy.  It wasn't boring, not with all the people coming in wearing
their interesting outfits, and most of them wanted to stop and talk with her,
but she felt a restlessness that she hadn't experienced before.  The
faint, throbbing beat of music coming through the walls had her dancing and
entertaining Jared with her jerky movements, but it was the only way she could
expend some of the energy that was building up inside of her.

She wanted so
badly to be back inside the club.  Even if she couldn't scene, she wanted
to watch.  To observe.  To learn.  Now that she'd actually
experienced two scenes, she wanted to see more of how other couples
interacted.  IT was a bit like having a taste of chocolate.  Just a
small taste.  Enough to make her crave more, and even if she couldn't eat
the chocolate herself, she wanted to know everything about it until the next
time she could have some of her own chocolate.  Okay, maybe it wasn't a
great analogy, but she really couldn't think of how else to explain it. 
Just that she wanted to surround herself with the sights and sounds of BDSM until
it was her turn again.  It felt weird to crave living vicariously through
others, but it would still be better than sitting at the front desk and being
shut out entirely.

She stroked
the training collar around her neck.  Patrick had said to wear it whenever she
came to the club, and he hadn’t excluded work from that statement, so she had
it on tonight.  Just having it on made her feel good, but it also made her even
more restless.

"Can't
you sit still?"  Jared's deep voice was tinged with both amusement
and frustration, his dark eyes fixed on her from across the room.

Lexie grasped
her desk with both hands, trying to control the urge to kick her legs some
more.  "Sorry.  Too much energy."

"What did
you do, drink a pot of coffee before coming here?"

"No...
just..."  Her frustration swirled.  "How can you bear
it?  Standing outside the door... don't you want to go in?"

The big guy
looked at her, a little sadly.  "Go in and play with no one? 
No, I'd rather be out here where I can at least be useful."

Guilt settled
her down a bit.  Jared's on-again, off-again submissive and girlfriend had
been out of town for weeks now.  Granted, he always seemed happier when
she was gone and he could do his own thing, but he was also completely faithful
to her.  Not that she deserved it.  The bitch.  Marissa had a
habit of wanting an open relationship while they were apart.  Jared would
scene, then, but he never actually dated any of the subs.  Just got his
needs met.

All the
submissives in the club knew that Jared was always good for a cuddle or a
shoulder to cry on or a supportive hug.  Whenever he was free to play,
they were lining up for it.  Unfortunately, every time, Marissa would just
sink her claws back into him and he'd go along with it.  Lexie couldn't
understand why he bought into her manipulations every single time.  Then
again, she thought, not everyone could understand her patience with waiting for
Patrick to come around.  

"Sorry,"
she said, feeling bad that she'd reminded him of his own relationship issues.
 "I'm just antsy."

Jared looked
at her with sympathy in his eyes, and also a bit of big-brotherly resignation.
 "I really wish I didn't understand, but I do."

"You guys
will get used to me scening here eventually," Lexie said, giving him her
brightest smile and hoping to distract him from any troubling thoughts she'd
brought up for him.  "You'll have plenty of time to."

"Great."
 Sarcasm laced the word and he gave an exaggerated groan, but he actually
didn't seem too upset about it or anything.  Just kind of resigned and
maybe a little uncomfortable.  Then again, he, more than any of the other
guys, probably understood what it was like to be constantly denied a need. 
When it came to relationship issues, Jared had them in spades.

"So when
is Marissa coming home?"  Lexie asked, curious.  She did her
best to keep her dislike for the other woman out of her voice.  

"Next
week."  He didn't look super excited about it.  Lexie debated pointing
that out, but figured he probably was getting enough of that from the other
guys.

"That's
good," she said, noncommittally.  "Jake's coming home in
October."

Jared flashed
a grin, a reaction notably missing when talking about his girlfriend returning.
 "I've heard.  It'll be good to see him again."  He
raised his eyebrow at her.  "What's he going to think about you being
here?"

"Doesn't
really matter," Lexie retorted, smirking.  "There's nothing he
could say that would make me stop."  Her expression grew more
serious.  "I need this.  Just like you guys.  If not here,
I'll find it elsewhere."

The gruffly
protective look that he gave her was exactly what she'd expected.  She
didn't mean the words as a threat though, they were just the truth. 
Denying a part of herself hadn't worked out for her and there was no way she
was going to make herself miserable just for the Sentinels’ comfort.  They
just had to deal with the fact that she was just as much a kinky bitch as they
all were.

The front door
opened, letting in a mass of people all at once.  Lexie grinned, sitting
up and smiling.  

It was another
two hours before things really slowed down again, and Lexie was kept hopping
way more than she was during her day job.  She didn't just greet people,
check them in, and take their coats, she was also in charge of the Theme
Rooms.  It never ceased to amaze her how many dominants procrastinated on
setting up some time in a Theme room, waiting until they arrived to see what
was open.  Then, if they'd brought some of their own equipment, she was in
charge of making sure the bag ended up in the right room at the right
time.  Other submissives who worked at the club did the actual running for
her, but she had to know whose bag was whose and where and when they needed to
go.  A few carried their bags around with them, but most preferred not to
be burdened until they were ready to actually play.

So once things
started getting busy, Lexie rarely stopped.  Especially because people
always wanted to chat a bit too, before heading into the club.  Now that
she'd done a scene, people were even chattier than usual.  

Her shift
ended at eleven, at which point Miranda came out of the club to take
over.  Lexie could immediately tell that the other woman had done a scene
earlier that evening; she looked both flushed and satisfied.  Envy
trickled through her, but she knew that going into the club without Patrick was
just going to be a letdown.  There was no way she was going to break their
agreement not to play with others, and if she went in without him, he'd
probably just take it as a direct challenge and send her home.  That kind
of stunt was considered topping from the bottom.